All of My Love
by Aaliamad
Summary: When Hyde is at his lowest can Jackie step up and be there for him?
1. Chapter 1

_Wednesday, July 8th, 1981_

 _Hyde's House_

The lump in Hyde's throat grew thick and the pain was like nothing he'd ever felt before. His grip on the bedspread tightened as tears threatened to fall for the hundredth time that day. He swallowed through the pain repeatedly, desperate not crumble into the emotional mess everyone was waiting for.

The emotional mess that he felt inside.

He turned around and leaned his back against the bed. Looking at his friend's sympathetic gazes was not an option right now. The guys were like brothers to Hyde, but even brotherly love wasn't gonna get him through this one. Pulling his knees to his chest he put his head in his hands and wondered what the fuck _would_ get him through today, and tomorrow, and the rest of his goddamn life.

A nervous hand gently patted his shoulder. "Hyde, man, just let it out. You don't need to be strong, not today." Eric's voice was shaky, like he too had been crying as he paced Hyde's small bedroom.

"Yes Hyde, you have barely shed a tear all day, that can't be good." Fez was sitting on the other side of the bed and Hyde was sure that the guy hadn't stopped crying all freaking day. He'd probably cried enough tears for all of them and his dramatics were starting to piss Hyde off. Hell, everything was starting to piss him off. The constant ringing of the doorbell, the constant stream of visitors, the casseroles, the pies, and most of all, the constant streams of tears, were all reminders of the living nightmare he had found himself in.

Eric's hand returned to Hyde's shoulder, this time with more force. "We're here for you Hyde, we're all here for you. We want to help, you just gotta let us," Eric said, his voice nearly a whisper.

Hyde tried to say something, he tried to tell them that he was fine, that he'd get over it and that they didn't need to fuss, but the lump in his throat was burning now and he couldn't bring himself to say anything. Instead he pulled at tufts of synthetic fiber sprouting out of the carpet. He'd never noticed how ugly the carpet in his bedroom was. The brown and mustard swirly patterns made him want to be sick and he wanted to rip the shit up. Floorboards. Polished floorboards would be better. Perhaps he could do that tomorrow.

"Wanna give me a hand lifting this carpet up Forman?" The words had come out without him even thinking, his eyes and mind still locked on the dirty, threadbare carpet.

"What? You want to lift the carpet? Today?"

Hyde shrugged. "Today, tomorrow, whenevers good for you."

Eric crouched down in front of Hyde and calmly said, "Hyde, you have a funeral to be at tomorrow."

"We'll do it today then, it won't take long. We'll need a sander though, for the floorboards," Hyde explained as he continuously ran his hand over the carpet. "Kelso, has your old man got one of those? He's got loads of crap like that in his garage."

Kelso looked up nervously from his seat on the old wooden chair in the corner of the room. "Ah, I dunno man, maybe. I could ask-"

"No Kelso, you won't ask," Eric cut in. "Hyde, we're not lifting your carpet and sanding your floorboards today." He stood up abruptly, breaking Hyde's trance, and ran a hand through his bangs. Hyde's eyes followed the lines across his best friends forehead; the lines of sadness, frustration, and anger.

"Eric, it might give him something to do, you know, to take his mind off things," Fez said quietly behind his hand, as if one tiny hand could shield Hyde from hearing him.

Eric's arms were folded across his chest now and Hyde was sure one lone tear was falling down his cheek. God he envied Forman and his ability to show emotion.

"No Fez, Hyde's mind needs to be on this." Eric turned back to Hyde and stared down at him. "Your son has _died_ man, you gotta let yourself grieve, ripping up carpet while all your family and friends are out there isn't grieving, it's hiding," he said pointing to the closed bedroom door.

In the full length mirror on the wall Hyde watched as Kelso's head fell into his hands. His shoulders were shaking and his foot was manically tapping the floor. He was crying. Everyone was crying. Except for Hyde.

"I'm fine," he said as he resumed pulling at the carpet.

"No you're not, and I'll tell you who else isn't fine, Cassidy. I haven't seen you talk to her in two days. Don't you think she needs some support?" Eric was starting to really piss Hyde off now.

"She has her family."

"But she needs you."

"Whatever."

Cassidy. Hyde let his head fall back on the bed, his eyes now studying the ceiling and the yellow tobacco stains that lay as reminders of the shithole he'd moved his family into. Cassidy had never once complained about the crappy house. All she'd wanted was to live with Hyde and their son, no matter where it was. The day they'd moved in she'd told Hyde it was the greatest day of her life. He still remembered smiling a half-hearted smile, wishing that he felt the same. But he didn't. She had been a one night stand, she was never supposed to be the girl he'd spend the rest of his life with. But her pregnancy changed all that and he'd tried real hard to be enthusiastic about their situation. But now the glue that'd held them together was gone and he didn't even know what to say to her.

"I agree with Eric," Fez said as he turned to face Hyde. "Cassidy needs you Hyde, the poor girl is so sad. You must comfort her."

"Whatever."

Eric slammed his fist against the wall, his eyes darkened with sadness and frustration. "No Hyde, not whatever! You-"

Eric's angry words were cut off by a soft knock at the bedroom door. Kitty Forman poked her distraught face into the bedroom, her eyes darting around the room and at the boy's solemn faces. "Steven honey, Pastor Dave is here, you need to come and sort the final details for tomorrow's service."

Hyde rubbed his eyes under his shades and sighed. He didn't wanna sort anything for tomorrow. What a waste of fuckin' time funerals were. It wasn't gonna bring his son back. It wasn't gonna take away the pain of losing a little baby. It wasn't gonna help.

"Can you just do it Mrs Forman? Please?" He looked at his foster mother with pleading eyes but the small shake of her head told him that even she couldn't do that for him. She walked over to his sorry form and bent down, placing a warm hand on his knee.

"Steven you have to do this, I'm sorry." Her tone was soft, like she was talking to a child, and right then he actually felt like a child.

He sighed again. "I know."

...

To others, wearing work boots everyday may have been unbearable, but Hyde had worn them everyday for as long as he could remember and usually to him those boots were as comfy as soft slippers. Today, however, as he made his way into the living room, Hyde could've sworn his boots were filled with cement. Every step was heavy. Every step was torturous. He could hear the quiet whispers of the well-wishers who had stopped by to offer their condolences, and the familiar scent of coffee lingering heavy in the air reminded him of the old ladies at church who hung around after the sermon sipping coffee and collecting the weekly gossip. It pissed him off knowing most of them would've come by today for the exact same reason. The death of a baby, it had to be big news in a small town like Point Place.

He stopped just before reaching the living room door that separated him from the gossipmongers. His chest felt tight like someone was standing on it, probably someone wearing his cement laden work boots, and he couldn't take another step. Just before he attempted to flee back to the safety of his bedroom a hand rested on his shoulder, the same hand that had been trying to remove his pain all day, Eric's.

"We're right behind you bro," he whispered as Hyde turned around and saw his three best friends. Fez wiped his wet eyes and smiled. Kelso nodded, his face sadder than Hyde had ever seen it. And Eric, well Eric, just gently pushed Hyde into the room he'd been avoiding all afternoon.

The afternoon sun streamed into the small living room and specks of dust floated through the air in search of somewhere to rest. Hyde wondered if his son was somewhere out there floating around looking for somewhere to rest. He hoped not. He hoped Johnny wasn't watching all of this, or worse still, searching for his parents. Tugging at the neck of his t-shirt the thought of his son alone or afraid made it hard for Hyde to breathe and he wanted to run for the door and escape the dusty, claustrophobic room.

"Steven," Kitty called, "come and sit down over here honey." She was gesturing to a spot on the old sofa next to Cassidy, the last place Hyde wanted to sit. He tugged at his t-shirt again, positive that over there, on that sofa next to Cassidy and her mom, there would be even less oxygen. He walked through the crowd of people avoiding their pitiful glances and sat down next to his girlfriend. Straight away she latched onto his arm, her wet tears on his bare arm sending an icy chill down his spine.

"Great, now we have you both here we can start." Pastor Dave was talking but all Hyde could concentrate on were the tears running down his arm and the bags hanging around the pastor's eyes. God if Hyde looked that bad he hoped someone would just shoot him. "Now, we have most of the hymns sorted but is there a song in particular you'd like played as Johnny is carried out of the church?"

Songs. Who gave a crap about songs right now?

Cassidy sat up and Hyde wiped his arm. "I was thinking," she began as she smoothed her blonde hair back, "maybe you have something in mind Hyde? Maybe one of your Zeppelin songs?" Her eyes were puffy, almost like she was having an allergic reaction to something. Hyde couldn't look at her.

"Nope I'm good."

She wiped her nose with the wad of rolled up tissues in her trembling hand. "There must be something you think might be appropriate?"

"Ah, no, no there's not."

Pastor Dave sat forward, nervously tapping his pen on his empty writing pad. "We have songs for these occasions, maybe you could pick one of those?"

"God!" Susan, Cassidy's overbearing, over weight, and overrated mother chimed in. "You have done nothing to help Hyde! The least you could do to help is chose a song to fit the occasion. Poor Cassie has organised everything!"

Hyde shot Susan an angry look as all the rage he'd been supressing since he'd received the devastating phonecall yesterday bubbled to the surface.

"Tell me Susan, tell me what fucking song fits the 'my baby died in his sleep at three months old and now we're burying him' occasion? Because y'know what, I can't think of one right now and truth be told I don't fucking care what song is playing while my son is gettin' carried outta the church in a freakin' wooden box!"

The room fell silent as everyone turned their attention to Hyde. He stood up as Kitty rushed over and placed her hand on his chest.

"Steven honey, it's okay, now sit back down," she said trying to calm the situation.

Everyone was watching the crazy, bereaved father's outburst, probably trying to commit what he yelled to memory so it could be shared down the main street tomorrow.

The only movement in the room came from Kelso who was walking toward the front door. As he opened it he looked over at Hyde.

 _Good old Kelso, he always knows how to escape an awkward situation._

Hyde nodded at his friend and moved to step toward the open door but a small hand reached out and grabbed his.

"Hyde don't. Please stay and help me with this." Her voice was small, her tone was pleading, but his mind was made up, he had to go.

Avoiding Cassidy's crying form Hyde stepped out of the door after Kelso, with Eric and Fez following closely behind. The warm air quickly filled his lungs and he could finally breathe again. And god he needed to breathe.

...

 _Later that night_

 _Jackie's Apartment_

 _Kenosha, Wisconsin_

Jackie wrapped a thick chunk of hair around her curling iron and clamped it closed. As she waited for the hot press to work it's magic she checked her reflection in the mirror and smiled a satisfied smile. Her make up was perfect, as usual, and her new coral lipstick complemented her olive skin perfectly. She just hoped her blind date tonight appreciated the effort. Unwrapping the tight curl from the iron the sudden sound of the phone ringing caused her to jump and burn her finger slightly.

"Damn you!" she cursed the caller aloud as she raced to her nightstand to pick up the phone. "Hello?"

"Jackie, it's Donna, where the hell have you been?"

Jackie rolled her eyes as she blew cool air on her burning finger. "God Donna, just because you and your hillbilly cousins talk to each other like that it doesn't mean you can greet the rest of us civilized people in the same manner."

"I've been trying to get a hold of you for two days, why don't you pick up your phone?" Donna sounded flustered, it was probably Eric problems again and while Jackie took delight in hearing about her best friends unfortunate relationship she really didn't have time to discuss it tonight.

"I have a _job_ Donna, and a life, speaking of which, I have a date tonight so I really have to go and finish getting ready. But call me tomorrow and I'll do my best to not laugh at whatever it is Eric's done now."

"Jackie, this isn't about Eric, it's about Hyde, I have some news."

News about Hyde. That was the last thing Jackie wanted to hear tonight. News about him was never good news and somehow Hyde news always seemed to be news that had major repercussions on Jackie's life. The last news he had to tell her was that he had knocked up a one night stand and that piece of information effectively ended their relationship for good.

"I don't have time for this now," she said, twirling the phone cord tightly around her finger. "I have a handsome man waiting to take me out tonight so whatever it is you feel you need to tell me can wait, preferably forever."

She heard Donna sniff. Was she crying?

"Johnny's dead."

Jackie's heart stopped for a moment. She couldn't have heard right. "What did you say?"

Donna's voice was louder this time but her words were still hard to hear between the sobs. "Johnny, he passed away yesterday morning. A little baby Jackie, a tiny little baby..."

"Oh my god." With a hand over her mouth Jackie sat on the edge of her bed. Images of Steven flashed through her head. "How? What happened?"

No answers came from her friend, only more sobbing.

"Donna! Tell me what happened!"

More sniffing. "I don't know...he passed away in his sleep, it happens apparently. Jackie you have to come home, the funeral's tomorrow at 10, you have to come..."

A funeral? For Steven's baby? This was all too much for Jackie to process and she took a deep breath before speaking as if trying to inhale the strength she needed to explain to Donna that she wouldn't be coming back. "I can't come," she whispered.

"What?" Donna sounded angry but Jackie couldn't and wouldn't back down.

"I can't come to his funeral Donna, I never even met him." It was true, she had never met him. The closest she'd even gotten to Hyde's baby was the few photos Donna had shown her over the past couple of months.

"So? It's not about that Jackie, it's about being here for Hyde, he's a mess."

Jackie closed her eyes as the images of Hyde continued to swirl through her mind. She could only imagine the pain he was going through and as she wrapped an arm around her waist she imagined wrapping it tightly around him. God she wished she could comfort him right now.

"He has Cassidy," she said flatly, trying to conceal the hate she had for his girlfriend.

"But he needs us. Cassidy's distraught, as you can imagine, but she has her family. _We're_ Hyde's family and you need to get over whatever beef you have with him and get back here! This is important!" Donna wasn't crying anymore, there was no sadness in her voice, only anger and that anger was directed at Jackie.

"Donna she hates me, she wouldn't want me at her son's funeral, don't you get it? I don't want to make a scene, the right thing to do is for me to leave them be. I'm sorry that you're angry, but I'm actually doing this for them."

"God Jackie you can be such a selfish bitch sometimes, but this is low, even for you."

Jackie wasn't surprised when Donna slammed the phone down abruptly ending their conversation. She also wasn't surprised at the cruel words her supposed best friend had hurled at her. They all thought she was a self-absorbed bitch and usually she played her role well. But choosing not to go to Johnny's funeral wasn't about being a bitch, she was actually doing it for Cassidy and Steven. Her appearance would only add to their agony and she couldn't do it to them. That would be low, even for her.

She slowly placed the phone back on the receiver and walked to her dressing table. Her reflection in the mirror was no longer perfect. Staring back at her was a broken doll, black mascara lining the cracks that she had spent years trying to repair. Closing her eyes she let what was left of her shatter and the tears formed new cracks. Her heart was breaking all over again but this time it was breaking for Hyde. And breaking because she couldn't be there for him.

No matter how much she wanted to be.

* * *

 _A/N: All questions will be answered throughout the story. Next chapter up tomorrow._


	2. Chapter 2

_Thursday, 9th July, 1981_

Hyde's boots felt heavy and again he was struggling to breathe. He felt a tug on his arm, directing him to make his way out of the pew, but those fuckin' heavy boots made it impossible for him to move. It was all a dream. It had to be a dream. Eric, Kelso, Fez and Cassidy's brother were not standing in front of him holding a tiny white casket. His little baby was not lying motionless inside the casket. It couldn't be real.

It had to be a dream.

And he wanted to wake the fuck up.

"Hyde come on," Cassidy said pulling on his hand. He looked down at her tear stained face, and watched as her bottom lip trembled, but he couldn't move let alone comfort her.

A familiar song suddenly filled the church, the lyrics spinning round Hyde's already scrambled head and putting his mind into overdrive.

 _There are places I'll remember_

 _All my life, though some have changed_

 _Some forever, not for better_

 _Some have gone, and some remain_

 _All these places have their moments_

 _With lovers and friends I can still recall_

 _Some are dead and some are living_

 _In my life, I've loved them all_

The Beatles. The fucking Beatles.

That song of all songs they had to go and chose, forever etching it in Hyde's brain as the song his three best friends carried his son out of the church to. Why couldn't they have picked one that he'd never hear again? A hymn or something? He never came to church so the chances of hearing a hymn again were slim to none. But the Beatles...well, he fucking loved the Beatles.

And those words... _in my life, I've loved them all,_ had always made him think. Hyde had only truly loved two people in his life; one of them he was burying today, and the other one he had been forced to give up in order to be a part of his son's life.

He had looked for her today. When Mrs Forman had read her eulogy all about how Johnny must've been needed as a special angel in heaven, Hyde had discretely scanned the packed church to see if she had come.

She hadn't.

If she had of Hyde knew she would've sat right at the back, protecting herself from Cassidy and the glares that would've been thrown her way. But she wasn't there and her absence hurt. She must've known what had happened by now; Donna surely would've rung her. Maybe she just didn't care anymore. Maybe she had finally decided enough was enough. He closed his stinging eyes and imagined that the hand currently holding his was hers and he squeezed it a little. The hand squeezed back and just for a moment he felt calm and allowed a small smile to creep across his face. But he was all too quickly dragged back into reality by the sound of Cassidy's voice.

"They're waiting for us, come on Hyde."

He opened his eyes and glanced at the pallbearers patiently standing, each with a hand clasping a silver handle on the small casket. They were all focused on the door leading out to the carpark and the waiting hearse. He had to go. He had to move his feet and get this over with.

Red lowered his head so it was right next to Hyde's ear and quietly encouraged him. "You can do this son."

The old man's words provided Hyde with the strength he needed and he slowly followed Kelso and Fez behind the casket. Kitty clung to his right arm, openly sobbing, while Red, W.B, Bob and Donna walked directly behind them. He was surrounded by people who cared about him, but he no longer had the two people he loved more than life and it was killing him inside.

 _But of all these friends and lovers_

 _There is no one compares with you_

 _And these memories lose their meaning_

 _When I think of love as something new_

 _Though I know I'll never lose affection_

 _For people and things that went before_

 _I know I'll often stop and think about them_

 _In my life, I love you more_

Hyde did, or had, loved his son more than anybody else in the entire world. The honour once reserved for a certain brunette cheerleader was bestowed on Johnny the moment the screaming little bundle entered the world. His piercing blue eyes, his chubby little thighs, the smattering of white blonde hair on his head, were enough incentives for Hyde to finally let go of the girl who had owned his heart. It hadn't been easy letting go of her, and a couple of times he'd questioned his decision, but every time Johnny smiled, or cooed, or laughed Hyde had been reassured that what he'd done was for the best.

But now Johnny was gone. He had become a memory.

A painful one.

Dropping Cassidy's hand, Hyde watched as his friends guided the casket into the back of the hearse and he tugged on his shirt collar. He was doing that a lot lately. Why couldn't he fucking breathe? It was as if the hot summer air was smothering him slowly and if that was the plan he wished it'd just get it over with quickly, he didn't want a long drawn out process. He undid the top button of his shirt and loosened his tie a little as Eric, Kelso and Fez made their way over to him.

"You okay?" Eric asked as he shoved his hands in his pocket.

"Yeah I'm okay" Hyde lied.

Kelso slapped Hyde's back playfully, trying hard in his goofy, adolescent way to lighten the mood. He winked. "You wanna ride with us to the cemetery?"

Hyde smiled. He knew exactly what Kelso had in mind but while circle time had been a godsend yesterday his brain knew it couldn't handle it today. "Nah man, I'll drive Cass, meet you guys there."

The boys nodded and made their way to the Cruiser while Hyde unlocked the El Camino. He hopped inside and leaned over to the passenger door, unlocking it for Cassidy. It was the first time they'd been alone together since their baby had died and the smothering feeling Hyde was becoming accustomed to was returning in full force.

He wound the window down before starting the engine. "God it's hot."

Cassidy wiped her eyes and checked her reflection in the rear view mirror. "Yeah it is," she said as she wound her window down as well. "It was a lovely service don't you think? He would've liked it."

Hyde shrugged. "I guess it was okay. Dunno that a three month old would've 'liked it' though."

"You know what I mean Hyde. As far as funeral's go, it was nice."

Hyde drove the short distance to the cemetery avoiding making eye contact with his passenger. The Beatle's song was bugging him and although he new it could be the start of an argument he had to bring it up with her. "What was with that fuckin' song at the end man? Who chose that? Talk about ruin a great song."

Cassidy glared at him. "My mother did actually-"

"Should've known."

"My mother chose it because you were M.I.A all bloody night! You should've chosen the song like I asked you to. But no, our son dies and you go off with your stupid friends and leave me and my family to do all the work." Cassidy was huddled up next to the car door screaming at Hyde as he focused on the road. "Why won't you even look at me?"

He said nothing, and not because he didn't want to but because he actually didn't know what to say. He didn't know why he couldn't look at her.

"Hyde," her voice was calmer now as they entered the cemetery gates, "Are you coming home with me tonight?"

He parked the car and sighed. He was an asshole, that he knew, but he figured she deserved some honesty. "Probably not," he answered, both hands still gripping the wheel.

Cassidy let out a little sob before placing her hand on the door handle. "Where will you be?"

"Where I was last night...where I belong, in the Forman's basement."

...

Jackie pulled her Ford Pinto in behind a large station wagon and put the car into park. She was far enough away from the funeral to go unnoticed but close enough to see the sadness which seemed to darken Hyde's face. He was walking back to the line of cars with Donna at his side and a tear fell from Jackie's eye as she watched Donna slide her arm around Hyde's and lay her head on his shoulder. For a second Jackie contemplated running to him, to offer him her shoulder to cry on. Just the thought of him in her arms caused her heartbeat to accelerate but she pushed aside her own selfish feelings. Today wasn't about her needs. Today was about parents grieving for their son, neither of whom wanted her anywhere near them.

As Hyde and Donna reached the black Camino Jackie studied every movement her ex-boyfriend made. The way he placed his forehead onto the roof of the car and covered his head with his hands was something she'd never seen him do before. Her Steven had never suffered despair such as this. Her Steven was the one leaning against the car, thumbs in belt loops, smirk on face. He wasn't the guy hiding his face as a sobbing Donna gently rubbed his back and whispered consoling words in his ear. Jackie wiped the tears from her eyes as she realised that this Steven wasn't her Steven. This was Steven the dad. The Steven she never knew.

Not because she never wanted to know him, but because she wasn't allowed to know him anymore.

Jackie's wet eyes darted around the cemetery in search of the cause of her pain. Once she found her, cradled in the arms of her mother, Jackie didn't shift her gaze. Cassidy Wilson, the girl who'd finally ended the rollercoaster that was Jackie and Hyde. Some may argue she did it accidently, but Jackie knew Cassidy's motives had always been clear. The short blonde with the big boobs had wanted Hyde from the moment she'd moved to Point Place in the 10th grade. Unlucky for her though he had never noticed her, much preferring the company of the older, more sophisticated Jackie Burkhart. However, as Jackie had come to find out, Cassidy never gave up on landing Hyde and only needed one drunken night with him to get herself knocked up with his baby.

 _You bitch._

She felt bad cussing out a woman so obviously upset but Jackie couldn't help it, she hated the skank, and the feeling was mutual. It wasn't enough for Cassidy to ruin any hope of Jackie and Hyde having their happy ever after, but she'd gone so far as to destroy any remnants of friendship between the two. Hence why Jackie was sat crying in a stifling hot car in the middle of summer stalking a funeral.

Her wide eyes narrowed as she watched Cassidy approach Hyde and put her arm around him, shoving Donna out of the way in the process.

 _God Donna grow a backbone!_

Hyde didn't turn around to embrace his girlfriend and Jackie wasn't at all surprised. She knew deep down how he felt about Cassidy.

Lost in her own thoughts and stalking Jackie never noticed Kelso at her passenger window until he was banging his fist on the glass. She scowled as she leaned over and unlocked the door for him to get in.

"Geez Jackie why are you parked all the way over here," he asked as he closed the door and wound down the window. "Aren't you hot, it's like an oven in this car!"

Jackie rolled her eyes before locking them again on Hyde. "I'm watching from a distance Michael, so as not to upset anybody." There was a crowd around Hyde and Cassidy now and Jackie was struggling to see him.

"You should've just come to the funeral, you know he would've wanted to see you."

"No he wouldn't, he made that clear to me the last time we saw each other," Jackie said sadly as she watched Hyde turn around and hug Kitty. The love Kitty had for Steven always warmed Jackie's heart and she felt a small smile creep over her face.

 _At least he has her..._

Kelso took his blue tie off and began to roll it up. "Hey, why don't you come to the Forman's for the food and drinking bit -"

"It's called a wake," Jackie interrupted.

"Wake...food, drink, whatever. Why don't you just come? Everyone wants to see you."

" _She w_ on't want to see me. You know that, I know that, Steven knows that. I want to be there for him Michael, more than anything in the world...but I can't do it. He left me for her -"

"For him."

Jackie looked at Kelso and noticed the tears forming in his eyes. Bringing her thumb to his face she wiped the small drops of moisture away and smiled. Michael always was a big softy, it was something she had always loved about him. The cheating thing was what she hated.

"He left me for _them_ , and I have to respect that...even now. So Michael, you can't tell him you saw me okay? Promise me."

Kelso held her hand and brought it up to his lips. Kissing it he said, "I promise I won't say anything Jackie. But if you aren't gonna come to the Forman's then you really shouldn't stay sitting in here, it's like 200 degrees in this freaking car, you'll start melting soon."

"Thank you Michael," Jackie smiled. As the tall man winked and went to open the car door Jackie quickly grabbed his arm stopping him from exiting. "Wait," she said with wide eyes. "Tell me how he is."

Kelso sat back down in his seat and looked over at their friends by the Camino. "He's not good Jackie, our boys not good," he started, "he won't talk about Johnny, he won't talk about _anything._ He just sits there, saying nothing, staring off into space. We went to the water tower yesterday - had to get him outta the house y'know - we had a circle, drank some beers, and he didn't say a thing. It was weird man...it's like he's just given up..." Kelso's voice trailed off as Jackie's eyes left his face and settled on Hyde. She knew he'd be like this but had hoped against hope that he was at least trying to cope. She didn't want him to completely give up.

She put a hand on Kelso's shoulder. "Look after him for me," she whispered.

"We'll try Jackie."

As Kelso ran back over to the gang Jackie started the car and made a U-turn. Focusing on the road ahead she desperately tried to not look back at him. She had to leave him behind. She couldn't try to save him.

Could she?


	3. Chapter 3

_Saturday, 25th July, 1981_

Jackie parked her car outside the Forman's house and admired the pretty flowers growing in Kitty's lovingly tended to garden. Kitty's flowers always seemed the biggest and brightest in Point Place and Jackie attributed their glory to the devotion with which Kitty gardened in the springtime. The work she put in meant she would always get a glorious show in the summer when everything was in bloom.

Hard work paid off in the long run...most of the time.

As long as some skank didn't show up and run off with the man you'd lovingly tended to for years.

 _Stop it Jackie, you have to get over it. You are young, successful, and free, you do not need him and he doesn't need you._

Plastering a smile on her face Jackie made her way down the basement stairs. Hyde's car wasn't parked out front so she had taken that as a sign she was free to spend the afternoon with her friends. It sure as hell beat a hot Saturday on her own in Kenosha.

As she opened the door her smile faded. The friends were there, all in their usual spots, but the laughter and hijinks she had driven 30 minutes for were nowhere in sight, and if she had to guess why she would say it had something to do with the empty white chair nearest the freezer.

"Hey guys," she said as she swung her bag and made her way over to Hyde's vacant seat. A few 'hey's' and 'hi's' were muttered but the only person to make eye contact with her was Fez. She smiled at him as she sat down. "What's up?" she asked no one in particular.

Fez shrugged in his spot on the couch next to Donna. "Not much," he said. "You have not graced the basement with your beauty in a while. Why not? Do you not like us anymore? Have you made better friends in Kenosha?"

Jackie giggled as she adjusted her off the shoulder top, enjoying Fez's semi-compliment. She hadn't heard one in a while so a little bit of flirting on her part was just a knee jerk reaction.

"Don't be silly Fez -" she smiled.

"She's been hiding from Hyde," Donna cut in, not bothering to look at Jackie.

Jackie's smile quickly faded as the temperate in the room suddenly dropped leaving Jackie feeling cold in her crop shorts and flimsy top. "Donna that's not fair, you know why I haven't seen him!"

"Whatever." Donna nestled her head into Eric's shoulder and closed her eyes. The pain Jackie had seen on the redhead's face at the funeral a fortnight ago was still there for all to see.

"Donna, please - "

Eric shot Jackie a look. "Leave it okay Jackie? While you've been flouncing around Kenosha we've all been dealing with some heavy shit, and we're tired, and we're worried, and we're just not into playing Barbies with you today okay?"

His words cut like a knife. He may as well have stomped on Jackie with his ugly brown shoes like she was a manky roach crawling on the dirty basement floor. Never had Eric's words hurt so much. She looked across at Kelso, surely he understood. Hell he knew she'd gone to the funeral. He knew she cared.

"Michael?" She sought reassurance from the one person who had stayed loyal to her through nurses, strippers, and illegitimate babies, but all he could do was shrug.

God she hated shrugs.

Standing up she cleared the lump in her throat. "So that's it? You all think I'm some kind of heartless bitch?"

Fez quickly lifted his head off his hand and gazed up at her. "No, I don't think that," he said. "Hyde hurt you, so now you are hurting him back -"

"Fez that's not what I'm doing..."

Donna opened her eyes, tilting her head toward Jackie. "Then what are you doing? He won't talk to anyone, won't eat, won't go to work. He's gone all day, none of us know where. He's falling apart Jackie and none of us can do a damn thing about it but at least we've all tried, something you've never bothered to do. What do you think he'd do if the situation was reversed? Do you think he'd just leave you to suffer on your own?"

"He let me fall in a -"

"Oh my god stop with that story!" Donna stood up, her chest nearly touching Jackie's. "That was years ago Jackie and you falling in a creek is nothing compared to this! You know Hyde would _never_ let anything major happen to you, and you know you're the only person he's ever properly opened up to. Why won't you help him?"

"He has Cassidy! He chose her!" Jackie yelled, her voice piercing even her own eardrums, her heart pounding in her chest. Clenching her fists at her sides she stepped around Donna. She had to get out of the basement, the temperate in the stinky room was about as unpredictable as Mrs Forman when she was going through menopause.

Donna had other ideas though. Grabbing Jackie's wrist she pulled her back. "He's still your friend Jackie, and he needs you."

Jackie looked up at Donna and then at her friends sitting with solemn faces. They were worried about Hyde, deeply worried, but how did they expect her, _his ex-girlfriend,_ to help him? And why did they think he'd even want her help? Pulling her wrist out of Donna's grip she picked up her bag and moved toward the basement door.

"I'm sorry," she whispered before running up the concrete steps toward freedom.

Once in her car Jackie quickly started the engine and turned up the volume on the radio. Thank goodness the song currently playing was The Winner Takes All, she had to drown out the voices of her friends which were still screaming at her in her head and ABBA was always a sure fire way to cheer her up.

Driving the familiar route between the Forman's and the highway which led to Kenosha had become second nature to Jackie. She had done it so many times she was confident she could do it with her eyes closed. But today, instead of turning left at the skating rink and onto the highway, she turned right and followed the road towards Hyde's house.

 _Damn them all! I do care, probably more than all of them put together!_

As she approached his small house she felt butterflies float through her stomach. The mere thought of seeing him again was enough to trigger such a reaction. The 'Steven butterflies' she called them...only to herself of course. They'd first made an appearance years ago at the back of the Hub when Steven had so gallantly gone to jail for her, and they'd never left.

Not even when he paraded his skanky wife around the basement.

Not even when he'd come home and told her he'd gotten another girl pregnant.

...

(Flashback)

 _November 2nd, 1980_

 _Jackie's Apartment_

 _Point Place_

 _It was Sunday night and Jackie hadn't seen Hyde all day. He'd left early to help Fez move his belongings into the apartment he was now sharing with his new girlfriend Melinda but he hadn't returned, and it was making Jackie anxious. He always made sure he was home in time for the Sunday night movie but it was already ten minutes past nine. She picked up the phone and dialled the Forman's number. He had to be there either being fed by Kitty or getting high with Forman._

 _The phone only rang twice before Kitty answered. "Hello?"_ _She sounded worried. Jackie had forgotten how calls after nine freaked old people out._

 _"Sorry Mrs Forman, it's just me, Jackie."_

 _"Oh hi there Jackie, is everything okay? It's very late to be calling."_

 _Jackie rolled her eyes, imagining Kitty in her dressing gown standing in the kitchen with a concerned hand on her heart. "Everything's fine Mrs Forman, I'm just looking for Steven, is he there?"_

 _Her heart thumped in her chest as she waited for an answer, then stopped when the answer came. "No honey, I thought Steven had been staying with you for the last few weeks, isn't he there?"_

 _"No, if he was I wouldn't be calling," Jackie snapped before realising she shouldn't be taking her worry out on Hyde's foster mother. "Look, it's fine, he's probably somewhere with Michael or Fez, I'll just wait."_

 _"But Jackie, Michael and Fez are here eating my peach cobbler as we speak. I wonder where he could be...you don't think he's had an acci-"_

 _"Mrs Forman I'm sure he's fine." She didn't want Kitty to say the words she was thinking. "I bet he's at Grooves doing inventory or something n forgot to tell me. I'll call there now. Bye Mrs Forman!" She quickly put the phone down, not waiting for Kitty to say another word. Where the hell was he? Since they'd gotten back together a little over two months ago Hyde was always checking in with her to see how she was and let her know that he was thinking about her. He could see that his earlier refusal to admit his feelings, and his indiscretion with a certain stripper, had left large scars on Jackie and he had been doing whatever he could to mend those wounds. It just wasn't like him to be gone without a trace for twelve hours._

 _The sound of a key in the door jolted Jackie upright off the couch and the sight of Hyde's face had her leaping into his arms._

 _"Baby where have you been?" she cried, wrapping her arms tight around his neck. The smell of cigarette smoke wafted from his denim jacket and she shook her head. "Thought we agreed no more smoking."_

 _He hooked an arm around her waist and guided her backwards to the couch. "Ah, yeah, sorry about that, just needed a couple...or twenty."_

 _Jackie snuggled into the crook of his arm and swung her legs up onto the couch. "Busy day huh? What took you so long moving? It's not like Fez has much, only a few boxes of magazines and a few bags of candy." She waited for Hyde to laugh or agree but he said nothing. With her head on his chest Jackie could feel his heart beating rapidly and the concern that had moments earlier left her body came tumbling back._

 _"Steven," she said as she sat up a little to face him. "Is everything okay? You're acting weird."_

 _He took off his shades, threw them on the table and then rubbed his fingers hard across his forehead._

 _"Steven, baby, what is it?"_

 _He sighed before clearing his throat and leaned forward, clasping his hands together so tight they began to turn red. "Look, Jackie, we need to talk."_

 _Jackie's stomach knotted together and she placed a panicked hand over it. He was breaking up with her, she was sure of it. "Is it me Steven? Are you leaving me?"_

 _He quickly turned to her, cupping her face in his hands. She stared into his glassy blue eyes as he gently kissed her lips. "No Jackie, I told you I'd never leave you again..."_

 _The knot in her stomach unravelled allowing her to breathe again. Whatever it was that he needed to talk about they would work through...together._

 _Pressing his forehead on hers Hyde closed his eyes. "But I have some news," he whispered, "and you're not gonna like it."_

 _Jackie pulled away and grabbed his hands, furiously rubbing them with her thumbs. "Just tell me, please."_

 _Hyde sighed again and stood up. He was pacing her small living room with his hands on his hips. She wished he'd just spit out whatever it was he had to say so that they could snuggle up together and watch the rest of the movie._

 _"I was at the Forman's today-" he started, his blue eyes filled with dread._

 _"Is Red okay? I just talked to Mrs Forman, she didn't mention anything-"_

 _"God Jackie just let me speak okay!" His voice was raised causing her to sink back into the couch and pull her legs up to her chest. He continued. "So, I was at the Forman's and I got a call, from a chick...a chick I hooked up with a while back." He paused and looked at Jackie. She couldn't move._

 _"And?"_

 _"She's four months pregnant Jackie, and before you ask, it's my kid." Hyde fell into the armchair and buried his face in his hands, but all Jackie could do was watch him. Did he want sympathy? Did he want her to say everything would be okay?_

 _Did he want her to fucking congratulate him?_

 _"You're gonna be a dad?" Jackie's voice was barely a whisper, stifled by the large lump slowly forming in the back of her throat._

 _Hyde nodded._

 _"Who is she?"_

 _She heard him clear his throat. Was he crying?_

 _"Um, her name's Cassidy, she went-"_

 _Jackie stood up, her sadness suddenly replaced with rage. "She went to Point Place High?! Cassidy fucking Wilson...the bitch I TOLD you to stay away from?" She was wild. Cassidy had been a year below her at school and had desperately tried to hook into Hyde every chance she got. Jackie had warned him numerous times to stay away from her, she was a manipulator, and with the queen bee of the LOPPs as her mother Jackie knew just how dangerous someone like Cassidy could be. "You IDIOT!" she screamed, not caring if the neighbours heard her._

 _Hyde finally looked up. "Me n you weren't together Jackie, it was four months ago, we were only just starting to be civil to each other."_

 _"I'm not talking about that Hyde, I'm talking about HER...Cassidy...of ALL people you had to knock her up. God you're more of a fool than I thought you were." She stormed over to his discarded denim jacket and searched the pockets. When she found the soft packet of Marlboro's she pulled one out and lit it, taking a long, calming drag._

 _"What, you're smoking now?" Hyde asked quietly._

 _She exhaled. "Yes I am, coz I'm not pregnant so I can," she snapped._

 _Walking to the kitchen counter she thought of all the promises she and Hyde had made each other over the past two months. None had involved sticking around if children to other people popped up so this certainly wasn't a scenario they had planned for. And she hated not having a plan. She sat down at the counter and inhaled again, this time closing her eyes and imagining she was on a tropical island, away from this mess._

 _"She doesn't mean anything to me Jackie, she was just a drunken one night stand. I hadn't thought of her since-"_

 _"Of course you wouldn't think of her, she's disgusting. Aside from me you really have the lowest standards of any guy I've ever met Steven...and that includes Fez."_

 _Hyde exhaled loudly and sheepishly walked toward her. Unable to look at him Jackie turned her back and wondered how they would, or could, ever move on from this._

 _"What does this mean for us?" he asked as he tentatively slipped an arm around her waist. "I wanna be with you Jackie, I don't wanna lose you."_

 _Jackie pushed his arm away. "Don't touch me," she snarled. He pulled the chair out next to her and sat down, leaning his arms on the kitchen counter. He looked drained and probably more upset than she'd ever seen him look but right now she didn't care. He'd ruined everything._

 _Again._

 _Putting his chin in his hand he glanced at her, his blue eyes pleading like a puppy dog begging for someone to play with. "Please Jackie, tell me what your thinkin'"_

 _"I'm thinking your an idiot."_

 _"Yeah I know that and I'm with ya on that one. But what are you thinkin' about me n you?"_

 _She put her cigarette butt in an empty beer bottle and swished the bottle around until the light extinguished. Was that them? Were they about to go out again that easily?_

 _"I don't know Steven," she murmured._

 _"Do you still want there to be an us?"_

 _"God Steven, I said I don't know and I really don't know! An hour ago I thought you were officially moving in with me and we were starting our life together. That life didn't include a kid to another woman. A woman who just so happens to be the biggest skank in Point Place! I wish I knew where we go to from here but I honestly don't okay?" A headache was coming on, she could feel it twitching away just behind her ears waiting to release it's full effect and really fuck her off. She rubbed her temples but knew it was a waste of time._

 _Just like her relationship with Steven Hyde was a waste of time._

 _"Fuck Jackie, I'm so sorry," Hyde mumbled, staring at her. "If I could fix this I freakin' would."_

 _"Yeah well you can't, the damage is done and now you're stuck with that bitch for the rest of your life," Jackie spat back._

 _"I'm not stuck with her, just the kid. I told her I'm with you but that I'd be there for the baby. She knows that, she was cool with it."_

 _Jackie laughed and continued to rub her temples. "Steven, I'm telling you right now, she will not be 'cool with it'. She wants you and she'll find a way to get you. I don't matter anymore."_

 _"You matter to me." Hyde put his hands on her knees and leaned over to kiss her forehead. The smell of him, the feel of his lips, the depth of his voice, were enough for the floodgates behind her eyes to finally burst open. The tears fell is streams down her face and the pain in her head disappeared as she sobbed uncontrollably for the life together they were never gonna get. Hyde scooped her onto his lap and tried to kiss away her tears while she clung to his t-shirt knowing that their time together was coming to an end._

 _"I'm not leavin' you Jackie," he whispered between kisses. "Just trust me, everything'll work out okay? I promise you babe, we'll get through this."_

 _His words were reassuring but deep down Jackie knew the two of them wouldn't be coming out of this with their relationship unscathed._

...

(End of flasback)

Shaking off the painful memories of her and Hyde, Jackie quietly knocked on the front door. As she waited on the creaky porch, with butterflies still twirling in her stomach, she secretly hoped no one would answer. What would she say to either of them? It had been a bad idea to just turn up unannounced; an idea that would benefit no one.

 _I can't do this._

Quickly tiptoeing down the rickety steps Jackie's feet, and heart, stopped when she heard the screen door squeak open. With one hand on the handrail to steady herself she prepared to turn around and face Hyde.

"Jackie?" The female voice startled Jackie and she turned around.

"Cassidy, hi," was all she could say as she offered Cassidy a sympathetic smile.

Cassidy's face darkened and her eyes narrowed. She stepped out onto the porch letting the flimsy door bang shut behind her. "What are you doing here Jackie?"

"Uh, I came to see how you both were doing." Jackie took a step up towards the small blonde but her hand still gripped the wooden handrail tightly. "I'm so sorry to hear about Johnny."

Cassidy sniffed and rubbed her nose, her eyes darting in every direction possible but never letting them rest on Jackie. "Thanks."

"Is there anything I can do to help? I'm no cook but I could clean, or pick up things from the store, or maybe garden?" Jackie offered as she looked out at the empty, dry flower beds that lined the perimeter of the small yard. She hoped Cassidy wouldn't take her up on the garden offer, but the other two she could manage.

"Look Jackie, we have tonnes of help okay? The last thing we need right now is you stickin' ya nose where it isn't wanted-"

Jackie gasped. "I wasn't sticking my nose in Cassidy, I was just trying to help." She watched as Cassidy threw both of her hands up into her hair and closed them tightly into balls. The girl was a mess and it only made Jackie wonder just how well Hyde was coping.

"We don't need your help."

Letting go of the handrail Jackie ascended the last step so that she was now standing directly beside Cassidy. Peering over the smaller girls shoulder she was able to get a glimpse inside the home her boyfriend had set up with another woman. From what she could see through the screen door the place was a mess. Empty beer cans and spirit bottles were scattered over the dinning room table, and dirty dishes cluttered the small kitchen counter behind it. Her Steven may have liked to make out he didn't like cleanliness and order but she knew better; he would never live like this.

"Where's Ste...Hyde?" she asked as her eyes fell back on Cassidy.

"Stay away from him Jackie," warned Cassidy through gritted teeth. "I mean it." Her eyes were bloodshot but as she said the words Jackie noticed them grow two shades darker.

"I just want to see that he's okay Cassidy, that's all."

Cassidy put her hands on her hips and stepped closer to Jackie, causing the brunette to shudder. "I mean it, _stay away from him!_ " she yelled, her face hardened in fury.

The outburst was no more than Jackie had expected but the sound of the screen door slamming as Cassidy stomped inside still made her jump. She stood for a moment, unsure whether to try and smooth things over with the girl who for the last few years had been her enemy, or whether to run to her car and flee to Kenosha.

But she did neither.

As she started her car Jackie took one last look at the small house with the empty flower beds. Saying a silent 'sorry' to the grieving mother inside she gently pushed her foot down on the accelerator and headed to where she knew she needed to be.

With Steven.

* * *

 _A/N: Thank you so very much to those of you who have reviewed. I wasn't sure if people would like this story so I'm happy that some of you do. To the Guest who has recently lost a loved one - I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. The death of any family member is horrific but I know the death of a baby or a child brings with it even more questions and sadness. Thank you for reviewing xx_


	4. Chapter 4

_Twenty Minutes Later_

Hyde lay his head on an old log and found the wood which had been softened by decades of rain and rot surprisingly comfortable. His glasses did little to shield his eyes from the harsh afternoon sun and for the first time in his life he wished he had a hat. He closed his eyes in an attempt to block out the bright light and listened to the sound of water lapping on the lake shore. It was peaceful, tranquil if you will, and a far cry from the chaotic mess his life had become.

He had been coming here everyday for the last week just to escape the endless questions directed at him from friends and family. 'Are you okay Hyde?', 'How are you feeling today?', 'Did you sleep well?' and the worst of them, 'Do you want to talk about it?'.

Fuck he hated the questions.

No he didn't wanna talk about.

No he wasn't okay.

And no he wasn't sleeping well.

But _he_ would deal with it if they'd all just leave him alone for two goddamn seconds. They were concerned, they were grieving too, he knew that, but no amount of talking about it was gonna help him. If he'd learned one thing from his mother leaving all those years ago it was that time was a healer. Time helps you forget the pain. It was time he needed, not endless yabbering.

So he came here everyday, to this very spot, for some peace. He read. He smoked. He thought. And he didn't have to talk. The hours spent here were the best ones of his day. But when darkness fell he always returned home with the same tight feeling in his chest. The feeling of dread as he wondered how he could successfully avoid Cassidy for a whole night. He still couldn't talk to her. He still didn't know what to say. But he'd figure it out eventually.

He just needed time.

And the privacy of his special spot at the lake.

The sound of twigs snapping and crunching a few feet away startled him and he sat up. No one came here. Ever. Only he and one other person knew how to find this secret cove but someone was heading his way.

 _They fucking followed me the nosey bastards_

Readying himself to make a hasty escape he reached out for his keys and tin on the old log when he heard a familiar voice. "Thought I might find you here."

He turned around and just the sight of her made his stomach flip.

"Ah, hey Jackie, what are you doin' here?"

She walked over to the log and stood next to where he was sitting. "Looking for you," she said as she twirled her car keys around her finger.

"Why? What have I done now?" For the last few months the only time Jackie had sought him out was to yell at him for something. Talking was high on his list of shit he didn't wanna do today but engaging in a screaming match with her was even higher up that list. He lay his head back down on the log and prayed for peace.

"You haven't done anything...for once. Just haven't seen you in a while so I thought I'd come find you." Jackie sat down on the log a few inches away from his head. Hyde figured she must be hanging around for a while and for some reason that really didn't bother him.

"You thought you'd come find me or they sent you to come find me?"

"Steven when has anyone ever told _me_ what to do? Do you honestly think I'd come looking for you just because _they_ told me to? I was bored, driving around, found myself here and whadaya know, I see the Camino. It was fate," she smiled.

Hyde chuckled. "Fate? Whatever man."

Jackie kicked her sandles off and dug her feet into the pebbles. Hyde couldn't help but notice the different colour polish on her toenails; it wasn't the pink he was used to. He wondered what else had changed about the girl he had once known so well.

"God I haven't been here in forever," Jackie said as she took in her surroundings. Hyde followed her gaze. Willowy trees lined the edge of the lake, their long spindly branches and leaves dipping in and out of the crystal clear water. The blue horizon hung heavy in the distance reminding Hyde, as it always had, that there was a big wide world out there. There was more than this place, or 'their place' as Jackie had always called it. "You come here much?" she asked turning to look at him.

He shook his head. "Nah, not really, well...I guess lately..." He stopped talking, unwilling to 'go there' with Jackie of all people.

She paused for a moment, waiting for him to continue, but he didn't. So they sat in a strange silence that Hyde didn't find awkward. Instead he found it comforting; he wasn't alone but he didn't have to talk. It was a perfect Hyde situation.

When Jackie all of a sudden turned to him and opened her mouth to speak he remembered that silence and Jackie didn't go together and he closed his eyes pretending to be asleep.

"So," she started, ignoring his obvious disinterest in whatever it was she had to say, "I stopped by your house earlier."

That got his attention.

"Why?"

"To see how you were."

He cleared his throat nervously while resting his arm over his eyes. "Was anybody home?"

"I saw Cassidy," she answered and just hearing Jackie say her name caused Hyde's jaw to clench.

"How was that?"

"It went as well as I expected it to go. I didn't want to upset her Steven, I just wanted to see how you were doing. I'm really sorry if my going there starts shit between the two of you."

Her voice was soft and heartfelt and he knew the guts it would've taken for her to go to his house alone. Jackie had guts, he'd always loved that about her. Moving his arm away he opened his eyes and looked at her. She was still beautiful. She'd always be beautiful.

"Don't worry about it man," he said, "I won't be." He really didn't give a crap about what Cassidy had to say to him about Jackie, although he was somewhat concerned about what Cassidy could do to Jackie if she was tipped over the edge.

Jackie leaned back against the log and turned to face him. The sparkle that usually radiated from her green eyes was absent, replaced by a sadness that left Hyde feeling cold. He looked away, preferring the view of the lake to the view of pity.

"Are you o-" she started.

"Jackie please don't fuckin' ask me if I'm okay." Through the corner of his eye he saw her flinch. God what did she expect? Did she honestly expect him to sit and tell her all about his goddamn feelings? She should've known better.

"Actually, I was gonna ask you if you were any better at skipping stones, but I guess I won't." Her quick recovery got a smile out of Hyde and he turned to watch her throwing a flat stone up and down.

"You know I'm the champion," he said.

"So you've been practising then? Coz you certainly weren't a champion last time we were here."

Hyde laughed and sat up. He scoured the area around him and found the perfect stone. "Of course I was, and no, I haven't been practising. Practising is for losers who have nothin' better to do with their time."

Jackie rolled her eyes and stood up. "Whatever," she said as she ran to the shoreline. "Let's see if I'm still the champion."

"Jackie you were never the champion, I let you win, because you're a girl and I felt sorry for you." He grinned as she cocked an eyebrow and glared at him. "C'mon, show me what you got."

Hyde followed her down to the water's edge with an overwhelming sense of relief. She had dropped it. She hadn't pressed him to talk. She wasn't walking on eggshells so as not to upset him. Instead, she was yapping on about how much better she was than him. It was as if nothing had ever changed.

With her stone set in the crook of her finger Jackie crouched down and attempted to ensure the stone was as parallel to the water as could be. Hyde sighed as he waited not-so-patiently for her to throw the damn thing. "Hurry up man, I've seen Kelso read a book in less time than this," he said as he threw his stone in the air and caught it.

"Shut up Steven," Jackie growled in a low whisper, as if anything louder would ruin her throw. She flung her arm back and then hurled the stone into the water, quickly regaining composure so she could count the times the flat rock skimmed the surface of the lake.

"10, 11, 12...oh my god!...13, 14, 15..." She counted excitedly before the stone finally relented to the lake's gravitational pull and disappeared. "Fifteen Steven! That's my personal best!" Jackie was jumping on the spot and clapping her hands. Hyde laughed, she had always been her own personal cheerleader.

She used to be his too.

"Righteo Jackie, step aside and watch how it's really done." Hyde moved his arm out, gently pushing Jackie to the side for dramatic effect. She was still bouncing, still cheering, still trying to put him off. He had to win this or he'd never hear the end of it.

Using the same technique as she had - he had taught her how to skim stones after all - but crouching lower and using more force, he released his stone. As predicted Jackie was counting, loudly, from the first skim. "5, 6, 7,...ooohhh Steven It's not gonna go much longer you can tell...9, 10,..."

"C'mon, c'mon, c'mon..." Hyde willed his stone to keep going but he had a feeling Jackie was right. "Crap!" he yelled as the stone gave up after twelve skims.

"Woooohoooooo! I won, I won!"

Dammit. She was kicking her legs in the air now as if she'd won the lottery not a stupid kids game. He was pissed off, he had always hated losing to her, but he still couldn't help the corner of his mouth from turning up as he watched her do her victory dance.

"Best outta three?" he called out while she did cartwheels along the shoreline. She stopped and stood up, straightening out her top before flashing a huge smile.

"Best outta three, but don't think the results will be any different," she winked as she bent down to search for the perfect stone.

The next hour was spent skipping stones. Best out of three had turned into best out of ten, and then best out of twenty. Jackie had won most times but Hyde had given up caring about who won twelve throws ago. He was just enjoying this moment. He wasn't alone, and he didn't have to talk.

This was cool.

"So," Jackie said once her last stone had disappeared beneath the calm water, "do you finally agree that I am the champion?"

Hyde was sitting on his log now, the sun was fading, the air was cooling, he was comfortable. "Yes Jackie," he sighed, "you are the champion. But don't go gettin' all cocky about it...it's only stone skipping, not rocket science or anything."

Jackie sat down next to him and brushed the water off her legs. "I'll have you know, stone skipping is actually physics, it's all about gravity, and angles and -"

"What a load of -" Hyde cut in.

"It is!" she demanded. "That's why I keep winning, you're too low to the ground Steven, being low is just a myth, the higher the better, so long as you keep the stone parallel to the water."

"Whatever," he sighed. He wondered where she'd learned the physics of the game he'd taught her. Did she have some stone throwing boyfriend? Or had she hooked up with some science geek? But it was none of his business. He'd given up the right to care about what she got up to a long time ago.

"You gettin' cold?" he asked when he noticed her rubbing her arms with her hands. The gentle breeze was catching wisps of her hair and blowing them across her face and he had to stop himself from brushing them behind her ear. He'd also lost the right to touch her a long time ago.

"Yeah I am a bit," she said, shuffling a little closer to him. Hyde's body stiffened and he automatically folded his arms across his chest to keep them from wrapping around her.

She sighed. "I should get going, I have a long drive ahead of me."

"Yeah I guess." He didn't want her to go. He didn't want the day to be over. Once she drove away Hyde's life would go back to the living nightmare it had become and being with her today had been a refreshing interlude during that nightmare. He'd try and stall her. "How's life in Kenosha anyway? You still liking your job on the radio?"

She smiled as she looked out at the lake. "It's good, I like being there, loads more shops than here and the restaurants are amazing, _way_ more variety. Do you go there much to eat?"

"Ah, not really, you know me, just kinda stay where I lay n all that, I don't roam far from home."

"Except for a concert or to go to Canada for beer," she reminded him.

"Oh yeah of course, but those are worth travelling for," he grinned.

Her smile faded and Hyde knew exactly what she had remembered. "And Vega..."

 _Please don't Jackie...not now..._

She quickly abandoned the words Hyde knew she wanted to say and cleared her throat. "Anyway, I guess I should get going."

"Yeah, hey, it was cool to see ya today Jackie," Hyde said as he tossed a pebble into the distance.

"It was good to see you too," she smiled as she checked his shoulder with her forehead. "Anytime you're up for a rematch let me know."

Hyde didn't know why he said it, and what his motives were, but all he knew was that today had been way more bearable than any other day over the past two weeks. He wanted to see her again.

"Um, I'll probably be here tomorrow if you really think you have a shot at winning a rematch." Lie, he knew he'd definitely be here tomorrow, there was no 'probably' about it. He was here every fucking day.

Jackie narrowed her eyes and grinned. " _Think_ I have a shot? I _know_ I have a shot," she said, flicking her hair over her shoulder. His heart sped up a little at the thought of hanging out with her again. "I guess I'll meet you here then. What time shall I come?"

Hyde stood up and put his hand out to help her off the log. "Ah, say 1ish? Gimme time to wake up n all."

"Still sleeping til noon huh?"

Hyde chuckled as they made their way to the track which lead to their cars. "Why not? Not much else to do."

"You do know you run a record store right Steven? You don't think maybe you should pop your head in and _run_ it every now again?"

"It's Sunday tomorrow Jackie, we don't open on Sundays, therefore I don't have to run anything, 'cept for rings around you of course."

She raised her eyebrows and pulled a leaf off an overhanging branch, throwing it in his face. "We'll see about that mister."

They walked the rest of the track in silence, the only sound the crunching of their footsteps on the twigs and debris scattered on the ground beneath them. Through the corner of his eye he noticed her bite down on her bottom lip, something she always did when she was nervous, and he swallowed hard. There was only one thing she could be nervous about with him, and that was the elephant that'd been on the lake with them all afternoon. He just hoped she had the good sense not to bring it up now. Surely _she_ knew him well enough to know that he wasn't ready to talk, even if everybody else thought that he was.

"A red Pinto Jackie? I'm surprised," he said as they reached the clearing where their cars were parked.

Jackie ran a hand through her hair and screwed up her face. "A 1974 Pinto no less," she said sarcastically before sighing. "It was all I could afford."

Hyde walked her to her car door and opened it for her. "Hey if it gets you from A to B then who gives a shit right?"

"Um, you? Mr 'I love Camaros more than life itself'" She hopped in the car and flung her bag on the passenger seat. "Well, I'll see you tomorrow, oh - and it's gonna be a hot one so bring your swimming trunks."

Hyde shook his head as he closed the door and waited for her to wind the window down. "So you can take the weather girl outta the radio station but not the weather reporting outta the girl huh?" he teased.

"You'll be thanking me tomorrow when you're not sitting on your log melting in your jeans."

Hyde smirked. "We didn't need swimsuits when we used to come here before. In fact, I can recall you bringing yours and not bothering to wear it." The memory of lazy summer days spent at the lake with Jackie wrapped around him flooded his mind and when she quickly shifted her eyes from him to the steering wheel he knew she was remembering the same thing.

"Well we're a bit older now so I'm sure we can both remember our swimsuits," she smiled as she started the car. "See ya Steven, thanks for today."

Hyde flicked her chin with his finger. "I'll see ya Jackie," he said before walking to his car.

Just as he was about to start the engine Jackie pulled up next to him. He wound his window down and saw she was biting that bottom lip again.

"What's up Jackie?" he asked, fairly positive he didn't wanna know.

"Um," she started, nervously rubbing her hands around the steering wheel, "I came y'know, the other week, I was there." Her voice was small and her wide eyes appeared to be filling with tears. She couldn't cry. Not now. It'd break him.

He smiled and nodded. "I know you were."

Her head titled up in surprise. "What? How?"

"Kelso told me." He could tell she was about to fly into a rant about Kelso's big mouth so he stopped her just before the words came out of her open mouth. "Jackie," he said as his engine roared to life, "thank you for coming, then, and today."

"Anything for you doll," she smiled before driving off into the still night.

* * *

 _A/N: Thanks so much for reviewing...I love 'em!_


	5. Chapter 5

_Later that night..._

Jackie fell onto her couch taking care not to let her dinner slide off the plate. She was exhausted after the day's events and promised herself that once her grilled cheese and the Love Boat were over she was going to bed. Sure it wasn't what most single 20 year old girls were probably doing on a Saturday night, but for Jackie it was heaven. She didn't want to go out tonight. She wanted to hurry up and sleep so that it would be morning and she would be one step closer to the seeing Hyde.

Munching away on her basic dinner she thought over the afternoon she'd just spent with her ex-boyfriend. His friendliness had surprised her but his unwillingness to talk about the death of his son had not. Getting Hyde to open up about anything had always been a massive task so she was fully aware that it would take some time before he shared with her his feelings.

Jackie's train of thought was abruptly interrupted by the phone ringing. As she reached across to answer it she hoped it wasn't someone from the radio station asking her to work tomorrow.

"Hello."

"Hey Jackie, it's Donna," said the voice on the other end of the phone rather sheepishly.

"Oh, hi Donna."

"Look, I just want to apologise for how I treated you today, I had no right-"

Jackie cut in, "Don't worry about, I'm over it." That was kind of true, Jackie was kind of over the way her friends had treated her earlier. The words they had said still stung a little but she was also pleased they'd prompted her to go and see Hyde. She'd enjoyed their couple of hours together at the lake.

"No Jackie, I was a bitch - you know it and I know it. You don't owe Hyde anything and I shouldn't have made you feel as though you did. I'm just so worried about him." The concern in Donna's voice was clear. It was the same concern Jackie felt for their friend.

"I know you are Donna, I am too."

"I wish there was something we could do to help him-"

"He needs time. The best thing we can do is give him time to process what's happened. You know Steven, he'll talk when he's ready to talk," Jackie said softly.

"But that could be never Jackie, Hyde never wants to talk about himself."

"Yeah, I know..."

"Hey, how do you know he needs time anyway? Have you seen him?" Donna questioned. Jackie cleared her throat and sat up, unsure whether to tell Donna about her afternoon or keep their meeting to herself.

"Well, yeah, I did see him this afternoon."

"What? Where? How was he?"

"He was as good as can be expected -" Jackie started.

"Did he talk about Johnny? Did he mention Cassidy? Or going back to work?" The questions were spewing out of Donna's mouth and suddenly Jackie wished she'd kept her afternoon with Hyde private.

"No Donna, he didn't talk about Johnny. Like I _just_ said, he needs time. He's not just gonna tell all about how he's feeling straight away. The last thing he needs is pressure from everyone. We didn't really talk about anything today. We just hung out," Jackie explained.

"Hung out? Where?"

"It doesn't matter where." Jackie knew if she told Donna about the lake the whole gang plus Kitty and Red would all be there with their questions tomorrow. Hyde didn't need that. He needed space, not the Spanish inquisition.

"So you know where he's been going then?"

Jackie sighed. "Well I know where he was today."

"Is there any chance you'll be seeing him again in the near future? I just want him to know how much we care about him," Donna said, "He won't take Eric's calls, he barely stops by the Forman's. We all feel so useless Jackie."

"I know you do Donna, and so do I," Jackie said sympathetically. "If I see him again I'll be sure to let him know that you're all thinking about him."

"And tell him that he needs to be spending some time with Cassidy, the poor girl is alone all day trying to cope on her own. He should be at least trying to help her through this. They should be supporting each other, not avoiding each other."

Jackie screwed her face up as Donna rambled on about Cassidy. Sure she felt for the girl, but Hyde was her priority and she certainly wasn't going to be ordering him home to comfort that bitch when what he really needed was some comfort himself. "Yeah sure Donna, I'll tell him."

"Thanks Jackie. And hey, I'm really sorry about earlier on okay?"

"It's fine, honestly." Jackie had had enough, she wanted this call over with.

"Cool, so let me know when you see Hyde next yeah?"

"Sure. I have to go Donna, talk soon."

"Okay, thanks Jackie, bye..." Donna said as Jackie mumbled a goodbye and put the phone down.

She settled back into the couch and picked at what was left of her now cold grilled cheese. The pieces of the Hyde puzzle were starting to come together in her mind; he was hiding because everyone was fussing and trying to tell him what to do and how to cope. Did they not know him at all?

 _My poor Steven,_ she thought as she stared blankly at the TV, _I can, and will help you through this._

...

 _The Next Day_

Jackie retied the bow on her wrap-around dress before picking up the picnic basket and heading down the not-so-beaten track to the lake. Hyde's car was parked in it's usual spot under the corner tree so she knew he was already there, and she hoped he was eagerly awaiting her arrival. Once her feet touched the pebbles she looked over and saw Hyde sitting on his log staring out at the still water. He looked lost and lonely, and she knew that was exactly how he felt. Ignoring the sadness that was threatening to reveal itself in tears Jackie forced a smile onto her face and hurried over to him.

"Hey Steven!" she called out, struggling to walk steadily on the pebbles while simultaneously managing the picnic basket. Hyde jumped up and took the heavy pile of food off her.

"Geez whadaya got in here? Your whole damn kitchen?" he said as he set it down next to the log.

" _No,_ just some lunch for us. I figured that since you only just got out of bed you'd probably be hungry."

"I'm good," he said, "maybe later." Hyde sat down on the ground, resting his back on the log. Jackie could sense his mood was different today and for a moment she wondered whether it had been a good idea to come.

"Everything okay Steven?" she asked, knowing that of course everything was not okay with Steven, he'd buried his son only two weeks ago.

"I'm fine Jackie."

Her fake smile made a reappearance as she sat down next to him. Rummaging through her large muslin tote she pulled out a cowboy styled straw hat and presented it to Hyde. "I got you this," she grinned.

Hyde's brow furrowed in obvious disgust. "I don't wear hats, you should know that." He crossed his legs at his ankles and his arms across his chest defensively.

Jackie plonked the hat on him anyway before pulling out a similar one and placing it on her head. "I know you don't, but you should, you suit them, and besides, no one can see you here so no one will ever know."

Hyde took the hat off and tossed it on the ground next to him, looking only at the water, never at Jackie. He was gonna be difficult today but she was used to difficult Hyde, she could handle it.

"Just wear it," she ordered before picking up the hat, dusting it off, and placing it back on his head.

"Damn it Jackie-" Hyde started, trying to flick her arm away.

"Anyway," she interrupted, "how was your night?"

"Dark."

"Ha ha, you are _such_ a funny guy. You know what I mean, what did you get up to?"

Jackie had watched Hyde in her rear view mirror yesterday after leaving the lake and had seen him turn down the street where he and Cassidy lived, so she knew he had gone home. She wondered how his relationship with his girlfriend was, but there was no way she could ever ask him outright.

Hyde sighed and folded his arms again, cowboy hat still on his head. "Went home, had a beer, went to bed," he mumbled.

"Sounds great," Jackie said while thinking that this afternoon was gonna be a long one if all conversations were one way. "Well I got home around seven, had a bath, then I made some dinner. Then I watched the Love Boat...did you see it? It was such a good episode, Julie and Gopher, well they-"

"Jackie, I said I went to bed so no, I didn't watch it."

"Well I'll tell you about it."

"You know I hate it when you tell me about TV programmes, I don't give a shit about what Julie was wearin' or whether Vicky's hair was quote unquote ugly," Hyde snapped.

Jackie fell back on the log. Usually she would storm off about now but she couldn't leave him on his own, he needed her. "I was just trying to make conversation Steven," she said softly.

Hyde picked up a handful of pebbles and let them fall through the small hole in his clenched fist. Jackie watched his movements and was surprised at how small they were. She wondered if he'd thrown anything or hit anything since his son had died. Usually his reactions to upsetting events were big, loud, and destructive; they didn't include little pebbles.

"So you know how to cook now?"

"Huh?" Jackie's head jerked up and she looked at Hyde.

"You said you cooked last night, I didn't know you could cook," he smirked, finally looking at her.

She grinned. "Shut up, I cooked for you plenty, you were probably just too drunk to remember." She flicked her hair over her shoulder in mock irritation, but was secretly pleased Hyde was actually making some conversation.

"I had to be drunk, it gave me the courage I needed to eat whatever it was that you put in front of me." He smiled and poked his tongue out. God she loved it when he did that; he looked like a cheeky little boy.

Jackie raised her eyebrows. "Well you're not drunk now-"

"So you think."

Jackie ignored him and continued, "so why don't you have a look in the basket and see what I whipped up in my kitchen this morning."

Hyde raised his own eyebrows before sitting up. He dragged the basket over and opened it up. Pulling out a yellow Tupperware container that Kitty had given Jackie for her birthday he turned to her. "I'm nervous," he said in a mock tone.

"Whatever," she smiled.

He removed the lid and nodded his head in approval. "These look good, almost edible," he said as he looked at the turkey sandwiches Jackie had raced to the deli to buy that morning.

"Wait til you see what's in the other one."

Hyde placed the sandwiches down and picked up the other container, this one filled with chocolate cake that Jackie had bought from the bakery down the street from her apartment.

"Wow, this looks _really_ good Jackie, a whole lot better than the biscuits you made me years ago," he teased.

"Well eat some then." She smiled a satisfied smile as Hyde tucked into the turkey sandwiches. While she hadn't lovingly prepared them for him _per se_ , she had lovingly purchased them for him, and she was pleased to see him eating; it looked like he hadn't eaten in a while.

Four sandwiches, three pieces of chocolate cake, and one Tab later Hyde was done. Jackie was laying on a beach towel on her stomach, the heat of the sun nearly putting her to sleep.

"So weather girl, are we swimming or what?" Hyde asked as he walked over to her and stood by her head, blocking the sun.

She looked up at him. "Did you bring your trunks?" she asked surprised.

"No," he said as he whipped off his t-shirt and unbuttoned his jeans.

Jackie quickly turned away and covered her eyes with her hands. His manhood was nothing she hadn't seen before but it wasn't hers to see anymore. It, and him, belonged to somebody else.

"Steven! Stop!" she cried, using all the self-control she had to not peek through her fingers.

She heard him laugh. "I know you're tryin' to have a look Jackie, don't worry, I don't mind."

"Steven, no! I don't want to look actually...please put your jeans back on...it's not appropriate..."

"Jackie relax man! I have my boxers on, see."

Still covering her eyes Jackie didn't know whether to believe him. "I don't believe you."

She felt him crouch down in front of her and he pulled her hands away from her face, but she kept her eyes closed. "Jackie, don't be stupid, I have my boxers on, I promise."

"You better." She reluctantly opened her eyes and saw that Hyde was indeed wearing black boxers. Taking her hands out of his she stood up. "Lucky," she said as she untied her dress and let it fall to the ground. Standing there in her one piece swimsuit she noticed that Hyde didn't even flinch at the sight of her, he simply told her to hurry up as he ran down to the water's edge. His indifference was a good thing she told herself as she ran over the hot pebbles to join him. His life was messy enough without adding feelings for an ex-girlfriend into the mix. She wasn't spending time with him to try and recapture the love they'd lost; she was only trying to help him heal.

Or so she kept telling herself.

Tiptoeing into the shallow water she winced. "It's cold!" she called out to Hyde who was already waist deep and duck diving further out.

He turned around and shook the water off his face and hair, the clear sprays resembling crystals as the sunlight reflected off them. "No it's not, just get in." He dived back down, the ripples making their way back to shore and over Jackie's feet. His actions always seemed to affect Jackie in some way, whether they be in the water or on land.

Determined to be brave Jackie ignored the cold and waded further out toward where Hyde had been. Once the water reached her elbows she dived under quickly. She couldn't see Hyde, not under the clear water or above. "Steven!" she called out to the amphitheatre that was their cove. But there was no response. "Steven!" She was scared, but not because she couldn't find him, the fear came from knowing what was about to come. He did this every time; when she least expected it she would feel a yank on her leg and she'd be pulled under.

God he was predictable, and yet, so unpredictable.

Sure enough, she felt the yank, so quickly took a breath and held her nose. Down she went under the water as he pulled not one, but both of her calf muscles. She fought the natural urge to struggle, knowing full well that fighting him just prolonged the ordeal. He released her legs and just as she was about to swim to the surface for air his hands grabbed her shoulders and pulled her back down. Still holding her breath but fearing her air supply was running out, she saw his head bob out of the water to breathe. She took the opportunity to grab his arms to steady herself before kicking his shin with her bare foot. It was no match for her pointed boots but it was enough for him to release his grip on her shoulders so that she could swim to the surface.

As her face broke the water she inhaled a much needed hit of air. "Asshole!" she panted as she splashed water at Hyde's smirking face.

He splashed her back. "I get you every time, you're so easy," he grinned before diving back under the water and popping back up next to her.

Right about then was when he'd usually slide his arms around her waist as she wrapped her legs around his. Then they'd spend the afternoon making out in the water until their skin was pruney and covered in goosebumps from the cold. But his arms weren't sliding around her today, and all her legs were doing was treading water. Times had changed. They had changed. And as much as Jackie missed him and the relationship they'd once had she couldn't take advantage of his vulnerability.

"Race ya to the tree," Hyde challenged, his blue eyes glistening in the sun and setting Jackie's heart aflutter.

"Sure," Jackie agreed quickly before attempting to gain a head start on him. She could never understand why he always wanted to race her; she could always beat him in a swimming race. Her childhood had been spent at resorts and country clubs and her parents had always paid swimming instructors to keep her occupied. Swimming was a strength of hers, but not of Hyde's.

As predicted she reached the willowy branches of the tree before he did so turned and watched him swim toward her. Smiling, she said, "guess I'm just too good at everything?"

Hyde rolled his eyes and shook the excess water out of his hair. "There's plenty I can beat you at Jackie. Like I said, I just let you win."

"Whatever. Why would you let me win? You're way too competitive to just let me win."

"Because when you win you smile, and it's nice to see you smile."

Shocked at his words Jackie just stared at him. His face was void of physical expression but his eyes were filled with a sadness she'd never seen in them before. She wanted to swim to him and wrap her arms around his neck. She wanted to make _him_ smile again. But instead she just stared.

"You're cold," Hyde said as they treaded water.

"Not I'm not," Jackie lied trying to keep her shoulders emerged under water away from the breeze.

"Jackie, your teeth are chattering, c'mon, I'll race you back to shore, winner gets the last of the sandwiches."

...

By the time Jackie made it back to shore Hyde was already stretched out on her towel eating the remaining sandwiches. She'd let him win that race, he needed the sandwiches more than she did.

"The sun is so good," she said as she pulled a spare towel out of her tote and lay down next to him.

"Uh-huh," Hyde agreed with a mouthful of food.

She closed her eyes and for a moment forgot why her and Hyde were sitting side by side at their spot on the lake. Being with him had almost been like old times, minus the kissing, touching, love making, and I love you's of course. But she had to at least try and acknowledge what had brought them together again.

'Steven?" she asked, her eyes still closed.

She heard him gulping on his Tab. "Yeah," he said when he was finished.

"How are you?" It was a stupid question, that she knew, but he would know what she was getting at.

"I'm okay Jackie." His voice was small, so she rolled onto her side toward him.

"I know you're not okay Steven, no one would be okay if they'd been through what you've been through. I want you to know I'm here for you-"

Hyde reached for his glasses perched on the log and swiftly put them on. "Jackie I'm fine so long as people aren't fuckin' on at me about it. I don't wanna talk-"

"Is that why you've been avoiding the Forman's? They're worried about you Steven, and they care, whether you like it or not." Jackie sat up and shuffled closer to him. Placing her hand on his shoulder she was surprised when he didn't shrug it off.

Hyde brought his knees up and leaned his forearms on them. He was staring out at the lake, like he usually did.

"I know they're worried man, but fuck, I can't deal with their shit and my shit at the same time. Whenever I go there Mrs Forman and Donna start fucking crying." He paused and cleared his throat as though the thought of their tears were about to bring on his own. "And Red, even Red, keeps askin' me if I'm okay, or if I wanna talk. They don't get it Jackie...they don't get that I don't wanna talk about it. I just wanna be alone."

Jackie tucked her hand under his arm and rested her head on his shoulder. Tears were threatening to spill out of her eyes but she blinked them away. His words were so pained, his voice was so low. It was hard to hear her strong Steven talk like he just had.

"Don't cry Jackie," he warned.

"I'm not going to," she lied.

"Good, I need someone around me who's not a blubbering mess."

"I'll always be here for you when you need me," she whispered, gently stroking his arm.

"I'm pleased, coz I need you around, man," Hyde said before kissing her forehead softly.

The touch of his lips elicited a small smile on Jackie's face and his words warmed her more than the intense sun.

He _needed_ her around.

He finally needed her.

* * *

 _A/N: Thank you so much for the reviews! Hope this chapter was okay and the J/H interaction kept everyone happy. Next chapter up tomorrow. Thanks again._


	6. Chapter 6

Pulling into the dark driveway Hyde suddenly found it difficult to breathe. Feelings of dread and despair smothered him again, just as they had frequently done over the last two weeks. He sat in the car for a moment, gazing at the old house before him. It had weathered the ages, that's for sure, and with paint peeling from the boards and a rickety handrail leading up to the front door it now appeared to be merely surviving; strong only until the next tornado blew through town and took with it the tangible, and intangible remnants of a house that was no longer a home.

As he approached the porch he tugged again at his collar before reaching out a hand to pull open the squeaky screen door. The sound of Debbie Harry's gruff but mellifluous voice stopped Hyde in his tracks. If Blondie was playing, Cassidy had her friends over for the night, and Hyde was struggling to deal with her on her own let alone in a group. He turned to walk back to the Camino but it was too late, he'd been spotted.

"Hyde, you're finally home!" Cassidy slurred as she opened the screen door.

He slowly turned around and sighed at the state of her. Unsteady on her feet and clutching a wine glass it was clear she was drunk. As usual. "Yeah I am," he mumbled as he strode past her into the house.

Cassidy followed behind him. "I don't know where he goes everyday," she told her two friends as she slung an unwanted arm around Hyde's neck. "He's gone all day, everyday, only coming home to sleep."

Hyde crossed his arms, knowing full well what was coming next, it happened every night after all. This was when Cassidy's boozed friends would berate him for not being there for her and tell him what an asshole he was. Avoiding their judgemental glares Hyde's eyes drifted to the coffee table where, surrounded by booze bottles and lines of white powder, sat a photo of his son. He wanted to move it, to get the smiling baby away from all that crap, but he hadn't had the strength to do it when Johnny was alive and he still couldn't do it now.

"Whatever," he mumbled as he turned to walk down the hallway, ignoring the girls heckling.

Cassidy grabbed his arm. "Why don't you stay up and have some drinks with us?"

"No thanks."

"He's so boring, Cass, just let him go," called one of her friends.

"Yeah," Hyde said as he pushed her hand away and made his way to his bedroom, "let me go."

Closing his bedroom door he suddenly felt 8 years old again. How had he ended up here, with her? It wasn't supposed to be like this. He wasn't meant to be shut in a room trying to drown out the sound of his 'girlfriend' and her friends getting drunk and high. This was too much like his childhood; the childhood spent trying to drown out the sound of his mother and her friends doing the exact same thing. This was bullshit.

But this was his life.

And he deserved every bit of it.

He lay on his bed and checked the time. Jackie probably still had another ten minutes drive before she got back to her place. He'd told her to call him when she got home just to let him know she was okay; and maybe so that he could hear her voice again. He felt better when she was around. The little cheerleader was slowly giving him a reason to exist.

He pulled the phone from the nightstand to the bed and waited. If he knew Jackie like he thought he did she would hang up if Cassidy answered but there was no chance of Cassidy answering tonight, she was way too far gone. The only ringing she would hear was the ringing in her own head.

With one arm tucked under his head, and one hand on the receiver Hyde waited. In his room, away from Cassidy, and with thoughts of his day with Jackie swirling in his head he was finally able to breathe again. God he wished he could be with her every minute of every day. Her smile, her laugh, her understanding of his need to not discuss every fucking detail of his life, was what was getting him through each day and he loved her for it.

The loud ring of the phone cut short his trail of thought and he quickly picked it up. "Hello?"

"Hey it's me, I'm home safe n sound."

Hyde smiled at the sound of her voice. "That was quick, hope you weren't speeding."

"Do you honestly think I could speed in that Pinto? I couldn't even if I tried."

"Yeah I know. That's a pretty shitty car y'got there, Jackie-"

"Shut up you," she cut in. "What are you doing anyway? Sounds like you're having a party."

Hyde hadn't even noticed how loud the music and voices were, he was too used to it, and he found himself embarrassed that Jackie could hear what was going on at his house. "Ah no, no party. It's the neighbours, my windows open."

"Oh I see."

"So, what's on the agenda for you tonight?"

He heard Jackie giggle. "Well I'm gonna make some dinner now then watch the movie I suppose."

The Sunday movie. How long had it been since he'd watched one of those? How much did he wish he was with her right now getting ready to watch it?

"Sounds good," he said with a heart that all of a sudden felt rather heavy. "What time's work tomorrow?"

"I start at 5am, and usually finish by 2. Are you working tomorrow, Steven? Or are you still letting that store run itself."

"I might go in for the morning." Going to work would at least get him out of this shithole. "You feel like going to the lake tomorrow after work?" He closed his eyes as he waited for her answer hoping it would be a positive one.

"Um, is it worth it? I mean, I wouldn't get there til 3ish, so it would only be or a few hours then I'd have to turn around and come home again for dinner and everything-"

"I'll buy you dinner." Suddenly able to move again Hyde wanted to kick himself for sounding so desperate.

"Really? You'll buy me dinner?"

"Yeah, we'll hang at the lake then go to that diner we pass on the way home. Or isn't that fancy enough for you?"

She laughed and Hyde smiled but before he could hear her reply his bedroom door swung open.

"Who are you talking to?" Cassidy asked, using the door handle to keep her balance.

Hyde quickly covered the mouthpiece on the phone. "It's Forman."

Cassidy glared at him. God he wished she'd fuck off. "How can it be Eric when he's standing in the living room?"

Hyde's heart thumped in his chest as he scrambled to find a way to get out of this one. It wasn't that he cared about Cassidy's feelings anymore; that ship had sailed up her nose with all the coke she snorted up there. He just knew her hate for Jackie could potentially turn dangerous for his ex-girlfriend.

"I said _Mrs_ Forman," he growled.

"Oh, well it's nice that _she_ can put a smile on your face." The blonde's tone was unmistakably sarcastic and Hyde knew she didn't believe a word of what he said.

"Whatever, tell Forman I'll be out in a minute," Hyde said dismissively while waving a 'go away' hand toward the door. Cassidy took the hint and practically fell over as she stumbled into the hallway, slamming the wooden door after her.

Hyde waited for a second before talking again. "Sorry about that," he said quietly, cautious that someone in his house could hear him.

"Um, that's okay. Is everything alright?" Jackie's soft, almost angelic voice settled Hyde in an instant.

"Yeah everything's fine, so-"

"Was that Cassidy?"

Hyde sighed. Cassidy was the last person he wanted to talk to Jackie about. "Yeah."

"Is she okay?"

"Look, Jackie, forget about her man. Now are we on for tomorrow or what?"

"I don't want to upset her, Steven, she's been through enough and I don't want to be the cause of any more problems between the two of you. Does she know we've been hanging out?"

"No she doesn't, and she doesn't need to know. Can you come tomorrow or not?"

"I just-"

"Please?" Hyde cut her off.

She paused again. "Yeah alright, I'll come."

"Thanks," Hyde said sincerely, satisfied in the knowledge that he would be seeing her again tomorrow. "Hey I gotta go okay? Eric's here. So I'll see you around three yeah?"

"Yes, Steven, I'll see you at three. Bye!"

"Later, Jackie." Hyde hung up the phone and rubbed a hand over his tired face. Dealing with Eric was not something he could be fucked doing tonight but the skinny guy was sat in his living room with three smashed girls who were no doubt talking all kinds of crap, so he had to get out there.

 _Dammit!_

"What's up, Forman?" Eric was leaning against the front door frame, hands in pockets looking uncomfortable as hell. He glanced up as Hyde walked into the living room.

"Hyde, hey, how's it going man?"

Hyde walked past the girls without acknowledging them and gestured to the porch. Eric gladly opened the door and stepped outside where it was quieter and Class A drug free. The two guys took a seat on the step and looked out at the dark street.

"What brings you by?" Hyde asked.

"Well it was either me come or my mom, I figured I was the better option," Eric said nodding toward the living room. Hyde appreciated the fact Eric had always kept Cassidy's 'habits' a closely guarded secret from his parents and the rest of their friends. Although now he really didn't give a shit what people knew about her. He didn't much feel like protecting her anymore.

"Thanks man. Your mom would'a freaked if she'd walked in there."

Eric nodded, his eyes growing as big as saucers. "God can you imagine?"

Hyde chuckled, imagining Kitty dusting up the hundreds of dollars worth of coke thinking it was icing sugar. "How is your mom? And Red?"

"They're good. They miss you. Well, mom misses you, Red - who knows? I hear him mumble about you."

Hyde's head fell into his hand. He missed them too, even though it'd only been a couple days since he'd seen them. "I'll stop by tomorrow morning before work maybe."

"So you're going into the store tomorrow?" Eric asked as he turned to look at Hyde.

Hyde shrugged. "Yeah, thought I might spend some time there tomorrow. Check that Leo n Randy haven't let the place go to crap."

"I went in on Friday, it's still standing if that makes you feel any better."

"That is actually very reassuring."

"So," Eric started, "I see not much has changed with Cass?"

Hyde shook his head. "Nope. If anything she's gotten worse man."

"Come n stay with us then, get outta here dude-"

"What? And have everyone think I'm an asshole for leaving my girlfriend right after our kid died? Fuck that. People in this town already think I'm a loser, if I leave powder nose now they'll fucking castrate me."

"Not if they know what she's really like."

"Forman, who's gonna believe that shit? Her mom is the head of every damn committee in Point Place, everybody thinks that family are saints. It's my word against hers man. And remember, I did come and stay at yours n your mom sent me home to take care of Cassidy. I'm fucked bro."

Eric sighed and Hyde knew his friend believed he was fucked too. "Man Hyde, if only you'd left last month like you wanted to."

"I couldn't leave him, Eric-"

"I know you couldn't, n I don't blame you."

The two friends sat for a while, saying nothing. The sound of Madonna and laughter spilling out of the open windows didn't fit the mood on the porch but neither Hyde nor Eric attempted to leave. They both knew Hyde had to stay and they both knew Eric would support him for as long as he could.

"Hey, so you know it's mom's 50th next week right?" Eric asked as he kicked the loose bits of gravel on the step below him.

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that."

"She's having a barbeque this Friday n really wants everyone there. That means you _and_ Cassidy."

"Guess I can do it for your mom," Hyde said, his voice not hiding how unenthusiastic he felt about a party and his girlfriend.

"And just a heads up, moms inviting Jackie as well. I know things aren't good with you guys but for some strange reason mom thinks she's part of the family n wants her there. Just when we think we're a step closer to being rid of the devil she finds a way to claw herself-"

Hyde cleared his throat. "I've actually been spending some time with Jackie," he said quietly.

Eric quickly turned to face him, his brows furrowed. "What? When? And _why_?"

"I'm not explaining anything to you Forman except that I like hang'n with her okay?" Hyde folded his arms across his chest, unwilling to divulge any extra information to Eric. He hoped he'd said enough for his friend to stop bagging on her.

"Um, okaaaaaay," Eric said, still puzzled. "But what about Cass? If she finds out you've been seeing her she'll go crazy."

"Which is why she won't find out anything." Hyde turned to look at Eric. "Yet."

Eric raised his eyebrows. "Yet? So in time she'll have to know? Some unresolved feelings between you n satan I'm guessing. All I'll say, Hyde, is that you're grieving and you don't wanna go rushing into anything right now."

"Forman, if anything were to happen between me n Jackie now, or in the future, it definitely wouldn't be 'rushed'. This shit with us has been going on for fucking years-"

"And it never seems to work does it?" Eric interrupted.

Hyde glared at him. "Look, alls I'm saying is that she is about the only person I wanna be around at the moment okay? You better keep your mouth shut about it Eric coz if that looney tune in there," he said pointing a thumb toward the house, "or her mother finds out they'll fucking destroy Jackie. And if anything happens to her I'll seriously lose it. Got it?"

Eric's eyes grew dark with worry and he nodded his head slowly. "I won't say a word," he muttered as Hyde stood up and patted him on the back.

"Good man." Hyde waited as Eric took the hint to leave and stood.

"It was good seeing you Hyde, you take care."

"You too man, hey, tell your ma I'll be by in the morning so long as she doesn't cry," Hyde said, opening the screen door. "Catch ya later Forman."

Hyde watched Forman wave goodbye before driving off in the trusty old Cruiser. He checked his watch, 9.45pm. In 18 hours or so he'd be with Jackie again.

He sighed as he stepped into his house.

 _18 long ass hours._


	7. Chapter 7

_Wednesday, 29th July, 1981_

 _Lakeside Diner_

Jackie studied the menu trying hard to ignore Hyde's blue eyes staring at her from across the table. "Okay, what is it?" she asked, slamming the flimsy menu down on the table. "Do I have something on my face?"

Hyde grinned. "No, your face is fine."

"Then why do you keep staring at me then?"

"Because I don't know why you're bothering to pretend to read that thing," he said, pointing at the menu. "You always order the same thing, Jackie. Every. Single. Time."

"I do not."

"Do too," he grinned.

"No I don't. I'll have you know I have quite the sophisticated palate because I'm always trying new, exotic foods-"

"Exotic foods like chicken burgers?"

Jackie raised an eyebrow. "I do not-"

Wendy the waitress appeared with her notepad and pen. "Hey guys, back again I see? Third night in a row now," she said in between chewing her gum. Hyde and Jackie both greeted her in a friendly manner having decided the previous night that she was just about the friendliest waitress they'd ever come across. "So, double beef burger for you?" she asked Hyde who nodded. "And the chicken burger for you," she said to Jackie.

"No actually," Jackie said staring straight at Hyde. "Tonight I'd like to have the fish of the day please Wendy."

Hyde laughed. "Jackie, just get the burger, you won't like the fish."

Jackie looked at Wendy and smiled as she handed her their menus. "Like I said, I'll have the fish thanks. Make sure it comes with a segment of lemon please."

Wendy took the menus and winked. "Coming right up kids. I'll be back with your sodas in a tick."

Once she'd gone Jackie turned her attention back to Hyde. "Gosh I'm so looking forward to my fish," she said, both her eyebrows arched.

"Just know you're not gettin' my burger when you decide the fish is yuck and you're still hungry," he warned as he tapped the wooden table with his knife. The setting sun was streaming into their booth, it's warm rays lighting up Hyde's face. Jackie couldn't take her eyes off him.

God she loved being with him.

"I don't want your greasy burger, Steven, my meal will be glorious." She smiled as he began to laugh.

God she hoped that she liked the fish.

Jackie had driven straight to the lake from work every day this week. They had swam, skipped stones, sunbathed (mostly her), and goofed off. Every night they'd finished their day off with dinner at the diner and it had all been amazing. Every little bit of it. However Jackie couldn't help but wonder how long it would, or could last.

Or how long they could avoid talking about Steven's son.

"It's been really cool hanging out with you this week," she revealed without even thinking.

Hyde stopped laughing but the smile remained on his face, much to Jackie's relief. "Yeah man, it's been cool."

Jackie played with her napkin nervously, her eyes darting around the mostly empty diner. The only other patrons were a couple of old truck drivers obviously making a pit stop. She wondered if weekends here were busier.

"You okay?" Hyde asked as he leaned his arms on the table.

"Yeah of course, I'm fine."

Hyde stared at her quizzically. "What's on your mind, Jackie?"

Jackie bit down on her lower lip contemplating whether or not to talk to Hyde about her thoughts. "Well-" What the hell, she may as well go for it. "-we've been seeing each other every day but we don't seem to talk...about anything."

"We're talking now," Hyde grinned.

"You know what I mean," she said. "You've never mentioned Johnny." Hyde tensed and for a second Jackie wanted to take the words back. But no, she was gonna make him talk. "What was he like, Steven?"

Hyde sat back in his seat and exhaled loudly. His gaze trailed to the outside garden bar, his foot tapped the floor nervously. "He was cool," he eventually said, "so cool."

Jackie's eyes glossed over. He was talking. Finally. "I bet he was," she said.

"Like, you imagine that babies are just gonna cry all the fuckin time right?" He glanced at Jackie. She nodded although she was fairly sure babies didn't cry _all_ the time. "But he barely ever cried. When he was real little he would, like when he was hungry n stuff. But man, the older he got the happier he got. He'd just lay there smiling n makin' all those cute baby noises."

The smile on Hyde's face as he spoke of his son was priceless. Nothing had ever put a smile on his face like the one she'd just witnessed.

Not even her.

"He sounds amazing," she smiled.

"He was the coolest fuckin' kid ever, Jackie." He turned to look at her and her heart dropped when she saw the smile leave his face. "But now he's gone. It's over."

"But you have the memories." Jackie put her hand over his and gently rubbed her thumb back and forth.

Hyde shrugged. "Memories suck. They are no comparison to having the person in your life."

Jackie had to agree with him. The memories of him hadn't made her feel any better, they'd only served as reminders of what she'd lost. "Yeah I guess."

The awkward silence that had fallen was thankfully broken by Wendy and two ice cold sodas. They thanked her and kept their mouths occupied drinking for a few moments.

"I wish I'd met him," Jackie finally said, her straw still lingering at her lip.

Hyde put his glass down on the table and looked at her. "Yeah, me too. Would've been cool, y'know, if it'd worked out how we'd wanted it to."

A sharp pang in Jackie's heart physically hurt as she thought about the crib and baby clothes she and Hyde had bought for Johnny. They'd spent a whole weekend turning Fez's old room into a nursery for him and Hyde had given Jackie free reign over the project, not even complaining when she asked him to put up a unicorn freeze. But none of it was used in the end. Well not in Jackie's apartment anyway.

Hyde reached across the table and grabbed her hand. "Sorry," he whispered as if reading her thoughts.

She wanted to up and leave then and there, but her pain was nothing compared to Hyde's. She had to forget old crap and concentrate on him; no matter how much it hurt her to do so. "Don't be silly, it's fine," she said, trying her hardest to smile.

"It's not fine." He was still holding her hand in his and she wanted to melt. "I hated leaving you."

"I know you did."

"If I could go back-"

"Steven, if you could go back nothing would change. We've been over this so many times. We tried to find a way and nothing would work. If you didn't leave me she was taking him away and you would never have found him. You did the right thing."

"But I hurt you so much-"

Jackie shrugged. "And you got hurt at the same time. It wasn't easy on either of us."

The pain on Hyde's face was heartbreaking and at that moment Jackie finally realised how hard it had been for him to leave her. So caught up in her own heartache when he'd left all those months ago she'd never really believed it'd been just as hard on him. She had figured he had a new baby on the way to soften the blow. Perhaps Johnny had helped Hyde cope, but now he was gone and Hyde was alone.

"Come here," he whispered.

Jackie narrowed her eyes. "What?"

"Come over here by me," he said, gesturing to the spot on the booth next to him. Jackie looked around the diner, unsure whether to go to him. "Please, Jackie?"

Always a sucker for Hyde manners she shuffled out of her booth and slid in next to him. He turned to her and immediately wrapped his arms around her small waist. Lifting her slightly he slid a leg up onto the long seat and sat her between his legs. Her heart raced as she adjusted to being in his arms again and she automatically put an arm around his neck.

"God I've missed you," he whispered into her ear.

She wanted to cry. God did she want to cry. He smelled the same. His body felt the same. His voice sounded the same.

But things weren't the same anymore.

"I've missed you too Steven." His grip around her waist tightened and she waited for him to seek out her lips. But they didn't. He simply held her tight, his face buried in her hair as though they were the only two people in the world.

If only moments such as these could last forever.

"Here you go kids," Wendy said, placing their meals on the table.

Jackie turned to thank her but Hyde kept his face buried in the crook of her neck. "Thank you Wendy," she smiled.

Wendy winked. "No problem, just holla if you need anything else". As Wendy walked back to the kitchen Jackie moved to shuffle off Hyde but his grip stayed strong.

"Stay here," he muttered.

"But our food's arrived."

"So? We can eat like this." He sat up a little and released an arm from around her waist to grab a fry off his plate . "See?" he said as he shoved the fry into her mouth.

"Ow! That was hot, Steven!"

He chuckled and picked up his soda bringing it to her lips. "Sorry," he grinned.

...

An hour later, after food was eaten and sodas were finished, Jackie and Hyde were prolonging their goodbye in the diner's parking lot.

"Told ya to order the burger," Hyde said as he nudged Jackie's shoulder with his own.

Jackie frowned. "Why? I liked the fish," she lied, not wanting him to be proved right.

"No you didn't. You left most of it and ate nearly all my fries."

"Only coz you kept shoving them in my mouth."

"I only shoved them in your mouth coz you were just playing with that fish." He grinned and slid an arm around her waist.

"Whatever."

Jackie pulled the shades off of his face as he looked down at her. She hooked them into his t-shirt and was surprised when he didn't complain. "So, same time tomorrow?" he asked.

"I can't tomorrow, Steven, I have a meeting at 4 for work."

Hyde's grin vanished from his face, replaced by an obvious look of disappointment. "Really? Can't you get out of it?"

She shook her head. "I can't sorry. It's a monthly thing we have and the boss says that since it's only held once a month none of us have an excuse not to be there. If I could get out of it, I would."

He wrapped his other arm around her and pulled her in close. Her eyelids fell as she lay her face on his chest, overwhelmed at the closeness between them. Never in her wildest dreams had she ever thought her and Hyde would be holding each other again. It felt right.

Even though it probably wasn't.

"How am I gonna go all day without seeing you?" he asked, his tone low. Jackie wasn't sure if it was the tone of his voice or the neediness of his words that made him sexier than ever.

How good it was to be needed.

Especially by Steven Hyde.

"I can come Friday," she offered. "Although we do have dinner at the Forman's that night so we'll only have a few hours."

"Oh that's right." He sounded pissed off all of a sudden.

"What? You don't want to go to Kitty's birthday party?"

He sighed before kissing her forehead. "Not really, but I'll go," he said. "Just dunno if I can wait till Friday to see you."

"I'm sorry." She could've stayed like that all night; protected in Hyde's strong arms. But the long drive home and the darkness of the night forced her to pull away from him and say her goodbyes. "Three o'clock Friday, I'll see you then okay?"

Hyde said nothing, he just looked down at her with sad eyes only visible thanks to the clear night's moonlight, and her earlier removal of his ridiculous shades.

"Steven, I have to go." Her curly haired ex-boyfriend still remained silent so Jackie cupped his face with her hands and pulled it down to place a kiss on his cheek. "Goodbye," she whispered as she broke away and turned to unlock her car. Turning the key she felt him slide his arms around her waist again and pull her back into his chest.

"I'll miss you," he whispered into her ear, his warm breath sending a shiver down her spine.

"I'll miss you too."

All too quickly for Jackie's liking Hyde removed his arms from around her and began walking away. The sound of his retreating footsteps reminded her that he had somewhere else to be; a home he shared with somebody else. She wiped a tear from her eye as he waved goodbye, wishing that she was the girl he was driving home to see.


	8. Chapter 8

_Thursday, 30th July, 1981_

 _5pm_

Hyde sat in the Camino and fiddled with the radio. Every station was playing a crap song and it was pissing him off. It was 5 o'clock, shouldn't they be playing stuff people wanted to listen to on their drive home? He turned the damn thing off and sat in silence. Silence beat out shit music every time.

He pulled a cigarette out of his glove box and sparked it up. He'd quit the filthy habit when Johnny was born but after suffering through a shit night, a shit morning, and a shit afternoon he figured he deserved a fucking cigarette. Puffing away he wondered how he was gonna handle any more nights with Cassidy. After the amazing days he spent with Jackie it was growing harder and harder to go home to his 'girlfriend' and her drug whore pals and ignore their crap. Last night had been even more hellish than usual. Last night Cassidy had had the nerve to climb into bed with him and try to have sex. Flicking his smoke he shuddered at the memory of her booze breath and creepy hands all over him. No, there was only one girl Hyde wanted to sleep with, and she was in a fucking meeting.

He checked his watch, 5.12pm. Surely she'd be out soon? He'd driven to Kenosha on a whim, hoping like hell Jackie would be happy about his surprise visit. He wasn't sure what they'd do. All he knew is that he had to see her. He took one last drag of his smoke before tossing the butt out the window and into the gutter. By chance he glanced up and saw a group of people exiting the station's front entrance.

And there she was, in the middle of the group. Her dark hair was all swept up in a bun just the way he liked it, and her tight shirt was tucked right into her short, black skirt accentuating her hot body. She'd always had a killer body that girl.

Hyde stepped out of his car, which was parked next to hers, and waited. Rubbing his sweaty hands down the front of his jeans he watched her wave goodbye to her co-workers, and waited for her to notice him.

He was pleasantly surprised when she did.

"Oh my god!" Jackie gasped when she saw him leaning against his car. Her slow footsteps turned into a quick jog as she clip clopped over to him and threw her arms around his neck. "What on earth are you doing here?"

The enthusiasm she exuded pushed all thoughts of his shitty night and day to the back of his mind. Her smile, her sparkly green eyes gazing up at him, actually made him happy. With a genuine smile on his face he put his arms around her and said, "I came to see you."

Her eyes grew wide. "Really?"

"Yeah, I figured if the girl couldn't come to the lake then I'd bring..." Uh, he hadn't thought that line through.

"You brought the lake to me, Steven?" Jackie teased.

"You know what I mean," he smiled. "So, how was your meeting?"

"Boring. They always are. But look, I managed to do my nails while I was in there." She flashed her freshly painted red nails in Hyde's face and he rolled his eyes.

"That's great, Jackie, now come on, show me where you live."

"Are you ordering me around Steven Hyde? I didn't even hear a 'please'. "

" _Pleeeease,"_ he said as pushed her to her car. "Get in, I'll follow you."

...

"Now, it's not much, and it's kinda small, but it's enough for me," Jackie explained as she unlocked the door to her apartment.

"Whatever, Jackie, just hurry up yeah? It's hot out here."

Once inside Jackie directed Hyde to the refrigerator while she went to her bedroom to change. Making his way through the living room Hyde stopped to look at the collection of framed photos on a small table by the doorway to the kitchen. He smiled at the familiar faces of his friends but his jaw suddenly clenched when he realised he wasn't in any of the pictures. He couldn't really blame her for not wanting to look at him everyday, he had hurt her after all. But it still stung to see how much she had tried to wipe any trace of him from her life.

"Find everything?" Jackie said as she breezed into the living room wearing shorts and a tank top. Hyde quickly set a photo of Jackie and Fez back in it's place and stepped into the kitchen.

"On to it," he called out.

Jackie flopped down on the large red sofa Hyde remembered choosing with her. They'd picked that particular one because it was big enough for Hyde to lay down comfortably on and, according to Jackie, wasn't brown and ugly.

"So what's in the bag? You have homework to do?"

Hyde handed her a cold beer and smiled. The bag was meant to be a schoolbag but had never been used for one. Kitty had bought it for him years ago not knowing that Hyde barely went to school, let alone carried books to and from the damn place.

"Actually," Hyde began as he picked up the bag and sat down next to Jackie. "I brought some photos to show you. Y'know, seeing as you never met Johnny."

Jackie looked at him, her mouth slightly open. Maybe it was too much? Maybe she didn't wanna see his kid? He tossed the bag down on the floor and took a swig of his beer.

"I'd love to see them, Steven. Show me." She gently rubbed a reassuring hand on his thigh and he picked the bag up and unzipped it.

"Ah, there's a few, you can just skip through the boring ones."

Jackie took the large envelope of photos out of his hand and moved closer to him. "I'm sure there are no boring ones," she smiled as she started flicking through the glossy prints. "Was this when he was just born?"

Hyde looked at the photo of his naked son at the hospital. "Yeah, he was only a few minutes old there."

"I heard you nearly missed the birth?"

"Yeah I did thanks to fucking Kelso and that stupid car of his." Hyde was still pissed at Kelso for making him late to the hospital. The Camino was in the shop that day and when Hyde had received the call that Cassidy was in labour he'd rung Kelso to pick him up and drive him to the hospital. His stupid friend had insisted he knew a short cut but instead got them lost and to top it off his car overheated. By the time Hyde had hitchhiked to the hospital Johnny was minutes away from being delivered. "But I got there in the end," he reminisced.

"He's so tiny. Look at his little toes, they're smaller than my fingernail," Jackie said, examining the photos. "Oh Steven, look at him in your arms, he looks even smaller!"

"Unreal right? It was pretty scary holding him at first."

"I bet. I'd be scared about dropping him."

"I was." Hyde smiled and put an arm across the back of the sofa. Jackie leaned into him and put her head on his shoulder while continuing to 'oohh' and 'aahhh' over the photos. It was nice. Being with her was nice.

And being able to share memories of Johnny with her was even nicer.

"He looks so much like you." Jackie was nearing the end of the pile now and was looking at a photo of Johnny taken only a week or so before he died. He was laying under his play-gym on the floor wearing a pair of denim overalls Hyde had bought him. The big, gummy smile on his face got Hyde every time and he had to turn away as Jackie's finger trailed the little boy's bright eyes. "He so has your eyes don't you think? The blonde hair is all Cassidy though. And the smile, hmmm, that's yours too."

"Yeah, he totally looks like me." Hyde closed his eyes and kissed the top of Jackie's head. "I mean, 'looked' like me."

Still holding the photos Jackie turned into Hyde and wrapped an arm around his waist. He exhaled slowly, surprised that he was able to go through the photos and talk about his son without struggling to breathe. It was her, Jackie. She calmed him. Always had. Always would.

"Thank you for bringing the photos, Steven," she said softly into his chest, her warm breath penetrating through his t-shirt.

"That's cool," he shrugged.

To his disappointment Jackie sat up abruptly and began tidying the photos into a neat pile. It had only been a few seconds but he already missed her in his arms. How the fuck was he ever gonna leave her tonight?

"Hurry up," he ordered as he watched her fit the photos into the envelope. She turned around and glared at him.

"Excuse me?"

Taking the envelope out of her hand and throwing it on the table, he smirked. "Hurry up so you can get back here."

Jackie raised an eyebrow. "For what?"

Hyde grinned. "For this." He pulled her into his arms while simultaneously swinging his legs up onto the sofa and manoeuvring Jackie so that she was on top of him. Tightening his grip around her waist he chuckled when Jackie tried to free her arms which were jammed between their chests.

"Steven! What are you doing?" she squealed.

"I'm cuddling you. You always liked cuddles didn't you?"

Jackie tried to frown but Hyde could clearly see the smile in her eyes. "This isn't a cuddle, Steven, this is a wrestling move. And you have your dirty boots on my sofa too, no boots on my sofa remember!"

Hyde kissed her forehead while she half-heartedly struggled to break free. "Sorry," he said as he tipped her over so that she was jammed between him and the back of the sofa. He kicked his boots off onto the floor and looked down at her. "Is that better m'lady?"

Jackie sighed dramatically. "I guess so."

He smiled and tucked her further into chest. She wasn't struggling anymore so he knew her words didn't quite match her feelings. "That's good then," he mumbled, putting a hand under her top to gently tickle her back. She'd always loved that; having her back tickled before she fell asleep. Hyde had always hated doing it though. However today was different, today he didn't mind so much.

"So," she started as her arm slid around his waist. "What did you do today, Steven?"

"Not much." The warmth of the evening sun streaming down on them and the feeling of her body pressed up against his was blanketing him in a comfortable bliss that threatened to push him into slumber. The last thing he wanted to do was talk about his shit day.

"Did you go to the lake?"

"No."

"Did you see Eric or anyone?"

"Yeah, called into the Forman's earlier."

"And?" Dammit, she wasn't gonna drop it.

"And Mrs Forman cried, and tried to feed me. Donna hugged me. Kelso made stupid jokes. Usual shit..." he mumbled. God he wished everyone would just be fucking normal around him.

"Oh, okay," Jackie said quietly. She smoothed a pitying hand up and down his back and he winced knowing he'd made her uncomfortable.

"Jackie,' he said, lifting her head up to face him. Her eyes were glassy with moisture from threatening tears. "I'm alright okay? I don't need everyone fussin' over me-"

"But we're all worried about you."

"I get that, but you don't have to be. I'm not out there drinkin' n fuckin' shit up am I? I just want things to be normal."

Jackie placed a hand on his chest and nervously tugged on his t-shirt. "But what is 'normal' for you now Steven? Everything has changed and if you refuse to talk about it how are you going to deal with it and move forward?"

Hyde watched her lips as she spoke. They were so plump and pink and the mere thought of kissing them again sent his heart racing. Unsure whether or not his advances would be welcomed he slowly moved down and kissed her. Her eyes widened at the touch and he pulled away.

"I'm talking to you aren't I? We talked last night, I showed you the photos? I'm dealin' with it," he said as she stared at him in shock.

She licked her lips. "Yeah...I guess you are...mmm, yeah, well..."

A grin crept across Hyde's face when he realised his kisses could still elicit something inside of Jackie. Now he just wanted to steal another one. "Ssssh, Jackie," he whispered as she continued to ramble nonsense.

"Sorry," she stuttered, before sweeping her tongue across her bottom lip and giving Hyde all the encouragement he needed to grab the back of her head and pull her face to his.

The feeling of Jackie's tongue flicking around his mouth was even better than Hyde than had remembered. Her kisses had always been incredible but the way she was kissing him right now was on a whole other level. The taste of the strawberry lip gloss she obviously still used, mixed a faint hint of the beer she'd just been sipping on, was glorious and something he never thought he'd be tasting; especially on her. His girl was back in his arms and his lips were back on hers.

He actually felt fucking happy.

Until she pulled her mouth away.

"Steven," she said, her lips swollen, her fingertips trailing down his sideburns. "What are we doing?"

"We're kissing, Jackie. Well we _were_ kissing," he answered before kissing her exposed neck.

She lifted her shoulder and shook him off. "You know what I mean. You have a girlfriend, we shouldn't be doing this." Her voice was small and shaky and Hyde knew she was worried. He just didn't know if he had the reassuring words she needed to hear.

He sighed and twirled some loose strands of her hair around his finger. "Don't worry about her okay? You know how I feel about her-"

"So are you leaving her?" The spark that lit up her eyes was adorable and Hyde wished it could stay ignited.

"I can't just yet, babe. But I will," he tried to assure her, "I promise you. Can we forget about her for now?"

Jackie closed her eyes, her usual mechanism to stop the tears flowing. "I can't be the other woman, Steven," she choked.

Hyde pulled her close. "You're not the other woman, Jackie. You're the _only_ woman. You just gotta gimme time okay? We'll figure all of this out. Trust me."

He smoothed her hair while she cried into his chest, her tight grip on his t-shirt telling him that she felt the same way about him as he felt about her. She still loved him. Thank god.

"How long do I have you for?" Jackie quietly asked, her voice muffled.

"Huh?"

She looked up with red puffy eyes. "When do you have to leave? It's already 6.30, shouldn't you be getting home soon?"

Hyde swallowed hard. "Ah, I was thinkin', maybe I could stay the night? Only if it was okay with you of course?"

"Really?" A delicious smile appeared on Jackie's face. "For the whole night?"

"The whole night," Hyde nodded.

Jackie sat up and flung a leg across Hyde's waist so that she was sitting on him. "How? Won't she be wondering where you are and who you're with? Her n her mom will be calling all around town looking for you."

Every word she said was correct. Cassidy would search Point Place top to bottom trying to find him but he'd already come up with a plan; he just didn't want Jackie to know he was such a desperate forward thinker.

"Um, yeah she probably would," he said contemplatively, "I wouldn't want her to be buggin' the Forman's all night."

"No," Jackie agreed. He grinned when he saw how concerned Jackie appeared. She was biting her lip and staring off into space trying to work out a plan. She wanted him, and it was good.

"I got it," Hyde announced, quickly sitting up and catching Jackie off guard.

"What? What is it?!"

"W.B. I'll call W.B and have him cover for me if she calls there. Actually, I'll call Cass too n tell her I'm at W.B's."

Jackie's eyes sparkled with enthusiasm. "Are you sure he'll cover for you though, Steven? Where will you say you are? What if he gets mad at you for not being there for her?"

"C'mon, Jackie, it's W.B, he knows all about crazy girlfriend's...he was with my ma remember? Plus, I'm his son and he owes me. Pass me the phone," Hyde said as Jackie crawled off his lap and reached over to the phone, "Let's get these calls over with."

...

 _Five hours later..._

Hyde lay in Jackie's bed with her fast asleep and draped all over him. It was like a dream. A fucking awesome dream. But her warm, even, breaths on his bare chest reassured him that it wasn't just a figment of his imagination, it was real.

With the hand that wasn't wrapped tightly around his girl he reached over to the nightstand and pulled a photo out of the envelope. It just so happened to be his favourite one of Johnny. The little guy was fast asleep on Hyde and he was staring down at him smiling. It hurt knowing that he would never hold that kid in his arms again but having Jackie in them was at least giving him hope that the future wasn't all doom and gloom.

He just had to figure out a way to get rid of Cassidy.

* * *

 _A/N: Thank you for the lovely reviews! I'm pleased those of you following the story are enjoying it. Kitty's party will be up tomorrow. Cheers x_


	9. Chapter 9

_A/N: Prepare yourself...this is a long chapter. So, sorry or your welcome, depending on whether you like 'em long or short!_

* * *

 _Friday, July 31st, 1981_

 _4am_

 _Jackie's Apartment_

Jackie woke to the loud piercing sound of her alarm clock buzzing, and the low, familiar growl of Steven Hyde.

"Fuck, Jackie, what time is it?" the curly haired man lying next to her moaned as he threw a pillow over his head.

Jackie snuggled into his side, aching for one last cuddle before she had to get up for work. "It's 4 o'clock, go back to sleep, baby," she whispered.

"Why the hell is your alarm going off at this time? It's still dark out," Hyde grumbled as he pulled her in close.

"I start work at 5 remember? I have to get up now n get ready."

His sleepy hands roamed her body and Jackie softly sighed, knowing that leaving the comfort of his embrace was going to be difficult.

"Don't go to work," Hyde mumbled into her ear.

His order was tempting. "Steven, I have to."

"No you don't. Call in sick. This is a stupid time to be going to work."

Hyde's lips were lazily trailing her neck now, making it harder for her to resist calling up her boss with a lame excuse. But no, Jackie Burkhart was a professional, and she was never going to climb the ladder and become a TV news anchor if she called in sick every time a super hot guy like Steven Hyde was in her bed.

"I can't, sorry." She quickly kissed his warm lips before attempting to scoot out of the cosy bed.

He grabbed her wrist and pulled her back down. "You're not gettin' away that easily," he said, pinning her down under him.

The weight of Hyde's sleepy body made it too hard for Jackie to escape, not that she even wanted to, so she let him keep her there and assault her neck with his mouth.

"Did you sleep well, Steven?" she asked as she ran her nails lightly up and down his back.

"Uh-huh."

She kissed his shoulder. "What are you gonna do today?"

His mouth left her neck for a second. "Wait for you to get home," he said, gazing down at her.

Butterflies twirled in Jackie's stomach at the thought of Hyde waiting at her place all day for her to finish work. Since she had moved to Kenosha five months ago she had always come home to an empty house. No one was waiting for her in this town; let alone the man she loved with all of her heart. It was a July 31st miracle.

"Really? You'll still be here when I get home?" she smiled.

Hyde nodded as he moved down and began kissing her stomach, sending the butterflies into overdrive.

"I'll still be here if you're a bad girl this morning," Hyde said, hooking a finger under the elastic of her panties and pulling them down.

"Steven! Don't you blackmail me!" Jackie swatted the top of his head, irked at his suggestion.

Hyde laughed and bobbed his head back up. "I'm kidding, Jackie," he grinned, before catching her lips and sliding his hot, wet tongue in her mouth.

It'd been a long time since Jackie had had sex, and an even longer time since she'd had a morning quickie. The thought of making love to Steven excited her but something, or rather, _someone,_ was holding her back. It was one thing fooling around a little with Hyde while he was still technically with Cassidy but having sex with him while he still had a girlfriend was an entirely different situation. How could she be sure that he wouldn't go home later and have sex with the blonde skank?

Her body tensed when she felt Hyde's erection push against her core and she quickly turned her face away from his kiss. His hot kisses were making her stupid.

"I don't know if I can do this," she said, running her hands down his muscular biceps.

Hyde's hand continued to explore her body as if she hadn't even spoken. "Sure you can," he said as the same hand moved down to her bare intimate parts, "and by the feel of it I'd say you want to."

Dammit, why were her body and mind ever in sync?

"Just because I want to it doesn't me we should, Steven. You still have a girlfriend and for all I know you're still fucking her."

Hyde quickly pulled his hand away and propped himself up, his eyes focused on Jackie. By the streetlight sneaking in through the gap in her curtains Jackie could make out the seriousness visible in his eyes. This wasn't cheeky Hyde. This was 'I'm not fucking around Hyde'.

"I'm not fucking her, Jackie."

She wanted to believe him but a niggling doubt in the pit of her stomach wouldn't go away. "But you sleep in the same bed as her every night, how can -"

"I don't sleep in the same freakin' bed as her every night!" Hyde angrily pushed himself off her and landed heavily on his side of the bed.

"Why not? I don't get-"

"Just forget it, Jackie. You don't wanna have sex-we won't have sex," he spat. "You better go get ready for work, you wouldn't wanna be late."

Jackie's fingertips lightly pulled at her lips, her gaze locked on the ceiling. She hadn't wanted to upset him. She'd just wanted some sort of proof that things were over between him and Cassidy. But she was kidding herself; he'd told her only last night that he was stuck with the bitch for the time being.

Hyde's short, quick breaths signalled that he was angry. She rolled over and gently kissed his back.

"I'm sorry for bringing her up," she said hoping he wasn't going to ruminate over this for too long. His silence told her he probably was. "Steven." She pulled herself up and rested her chin on his shoulder. "I said I was sorry, but you have to see it from my point of view. I love you and you're with someone else. How do you think I'll be feeling when you have to go home to her?"

"Like shit," he said gruffly, "Which is exactly how I'll feel when I have to go home to her." His breathing was still shallow and when Jackie placed her hand on his chest she could feel his heart racing. He was anxious; nervous about something.

She wanted to delve further into it with him. She wanted to ask why he had to stay with someone he didn't even love. But she couldn't push it. Not now anyway.

"Come here, baby," she whispered gently pulling him onto his back.

He sighed as he rolled over, his eyes closing, a resigned hand falling on his forehead. "I don't wanna talk about this now, man," he said.

"Nor do I," Jackie purred as she climbed on top of him and whipped her singlet off. When she looked back down surprised eyes stared back at her.

"You sure, Jackie?" Hyde asked, his hands tentatively moving up her torso.

She leaned down and kissed him softly, her hand grabbing his tight curls. "I'm sure, baby."

...

 _4.30pm_

 _The same day..._

 _Forman Residence_

Jackie stood at Kitty's kitchen bench trying her hardest to chop carrots into even sticks. As she looked at her pile of long and short, and fat and thin sticks she wondered how Mrs Forman managed to always cut such perfect pieces. Someone needed to invent some sort of machine to do this job, and fast.

"Great job, Jackie," Kitty exclaimed as she picked up a pile and placed them on a platter next to some crackers.

"They're not as good as yours, Mrs Forman. But a worker is only as good as his tools, or so I've heard, and this knife is crap," Jackie said, tossing the blunt knife into the sink. "What's next?"

Kitty stared at her blankly for a moment before laughing. "Well I think the carrots look great, and they're only going to be crunched up in people's mouths anyway." The older woman looked around the messy kitchen and ran her hands down her apron. "Now, the foods all done, so I suppose we should get onto tidying up. The guests will be here in half an hour."

Jackie sighed when she saw the pile of dishes stacked up on the counter behind her. When Kitty had asked her to come early and help set up for the party Jackie had thought she'd be elaborately decorating the garden, not chopping carrots and washing dishes.

Pulling some pink rubber gloves on her hands she suddenly realised that a certain redhead was nowhere in sight. "Where's Donna, Mrs Forman? Shouldn't she be here helping?"

"No, dear. Donna's spending some time with Cassidy. The poor girl wanted a new dress to wear tonight so Donna offered to take her shopping. She's very good in a crisis is our Donna. So caring." Kitty carefully wiped down the kitchen table, oblivious to the steam coming out of Jackie's ears behind her.

Donna? Good in a crisis? Where the hell was she when Jackie hit rock bottom? Oogling a freaking Trans-am that's where. She certainly wasn't offering to go to the mall with Jackie.

"Mmmmm," Jackie muttered, furiously scrubbing a pot that was already clean.

"I think tonight will be nice for Cassidy, don't you agree? I know it's only been a few weeks since - you know what - but I really feel it'll do both her and Steven good to be out of the house and around people again. Lord knows being cooped up in that house isn't helping them."

Jackie eyed Kitty, deducing that the older woman could be her key to the mystery that was Hyde and Cassidy.

"How are things between Steven and his girlfriend? Losing the baby must've taken it's toll on their relationship," she casually asked.

Kitty stopped wiping and put a hand on her hip. "It's been hard for them, especially as they're both so young. And you know Steven, he doesn't say much and tends to push the ones who love him away when really he needs them the most. I think deep down he loves her but they are just too locked in their grief right now to communicate." She walked over to Jackie with more dirty plates. "Hopefully her pretty new dress reminds him of the reasons he fell in love with her."

Kitty smiled a hopeful smile and Jackie smiled a fake one back. Elbow deep in dirty water, and with images flashing through her head of Steven and Cassidy all loved up, she fought back the urge to scream. What if Mrs Forman was right? What if Steven was just too upset to know what he really wanted? What if he'd only turned to Jackie because it hurt too much to be with the one he really loved?

God, had she really been so stupid?

She scrubbed the last of the dishes so hard that Mrs Forman had asked her to go easier on them. She couldn't though, she had to take her frustrations out somewhere and Eric and Donna hadn't arrived yet. After Kitty went upstairs to get ready a sweaty sheen appeared on Jackie's forehead as she thought back over her day. Hyde had called by her work at lunchtime to tell her that he had to get back to Point Place. He'd forgotten earlier about the party and the promise he'd made to Red to help with the outdoor furniture. At the time Jackie hadn't minded that he wasn't going to be at hers when she got home. She had been too overwhelmed by the high she was on after their lovemaking.

 _Fool.._

The sliding door flinging open broke her out of her thoughts and she looked up.

"God Donna, finally!" Jackie virtually yelled, throwing a tea towel at her supposed best friend. "While you've been shopping some of us have been working."

"Jackie Burkhart in pink rubber gloves stood at a sink of dirty dishes moaning about people shopping," Eric chirped, walking in behind Donna, "am I in a parallel universe?"

Jackie's eyes narrowed. "Shut up, Eric!," she snarled. "And get to work, Donna. I want to get this done so that I can finish getting ready."

"Geez, Jackie, chill." Donna began drying the dishes. "Man, what's up your nose today?"

"Um, people swanning around the mall while others are stuck in a sweltering kitchen chopping freaking carrots and making stinky fish dips. That's what."

Eric sat at the counter directly in front of Jackie. "But Jackie, we only went to the mall to buy you a present."

Her eyes shot up and a small smile spread over her flushed face. "Really?"

"No," Eric deadpanned.

"Screw you, Eric."

"Look, Jackie, I don't get why you're so worked up. I only took Cassidy out to cheer her up. Mrs Forman said there wasn't much that needed doing here anyway," Donna explained as she stacked dry plates and placed them in the cupboard.

"Whatever." Jackie pulled the plug out of the sink releasing the murky water while also hoping to release some of the anger that had built up inside of her.

Just then the door separating the kitchen and living room swung open revealing a very dressed up Michael Kelso. "Well I see I'm the only one who bothered dressing up for the occasion," he said as he adjusted his powder blue tie and stared Jackie up and down.

She looked down at the dirty apron that covered her pretty pink off the shoulder dress and scowled. "Some of us have been-"

"Working, yeah we know, Jackie. You've told us a thousand times. Your medal will be ready in the morning," Eric said, rolling his eyes.

"Blow this." Jackie untied the apron and threw it on the counter. "You lot can finish up in here, I'm going to finish getting ready."

"Woah, man," Kelso said, putting his hands up. "I only came here for the free beers n food. These hands don't clean. I've been told I could be a hand model, can't be messing these babies up."

Jackie shook her head as she brushed past him and made her way to the upstairs bathroom. Her body was trembling from an odd mix of anger and embarrassment. Why had she slept with Steven so quickly? Why did her friends have to be such idiots?

How the hell was she gonna get through the night?

Thirty minutes later Jackie was finally satisfied with her reflection. The sweaty mess that had first presented itself in the mirror had been replaced with one of sophisticated perfection. Her make-up was perfect; not too heavy but enough to cover the tired eyes of a girl who'd stayed up way too late talking to her ex-boyfriend. Brunette locks tumbled down over her bare shoulders drawing attention to her smooth, olive neck. The pale pink dress, which stopped just above her knees, was set off by the beautiful silver locket her father had bought her for her 20th birthday. She looked good, and she hoped someone would notice.

Passing through the now clean and empty kitchen, Jackie stopped briefly to pour herself a glass of champagne. It wasn't real champagne; the Forman's could never afford the real French stuff that her parents had guzzled at their parties, but it would do. She sculled a flute glass down, and laughed at how proud her mother would be, before pouring herself another and heading out to the party in the garden.

As she approached the festivities the first person she saw was Red working hard at the grill. "Hey, Mr Forman," she said, stopping next to him.

"Hello, Jackie," he greeted her back, never taking his eyes off the sausages slowly sizzling away.

Jackie used the opportunity to scan the garden. Donna, Eric, Kelso, and Fez were sitting around a white plastic table in the corner of the yard. Kelso was dealing out cards signalling the beginning of drinking games. Dammit, it was going to be a messy night.

Kitty and Bob were in the middle of the garden dancing to Tom Jones who was blaring out of the small tape deck perched on the garage window. By the looks of it, Kitty was going to have a messy night too.

"Mrs Forman looks like she's having a good time," Jackie said, her glass lingering at her lips.

Red glanced up at his wife who was being swung around by his neighbour. "Good god, it's only 5.30," he grumbled. "Hopefully that means we'll be all done with this hoopla by 10."

Jackie laughed at the wishful thinking on the old man's part. He surely knew as well as Jackie did that Kitty could drink all of them under the table and still stay up and cook them bacon and eggs in the morning.

"Good luck with that," Jackie smiled before making her way through the crowd of people to Donna and the others.

"Hey guys," she said as she plonked herself down next to Fez.

"Why hello, Jackie," Fez said. "My, what beautiful shoes you are wearing today."

Jackie crossed her legs and wiggled her foot back and forth, admiring the pretty silver stilettos she'd spent a small fortune on. "Thanks, Fezzie. They are beautiful aren't they?"

"They really are," he agreed, bending down to touch them.

"So," Kelso started as he dealt out a new round of cards, "you in a better mood now, Jackie?"

"Yes, Michael. Thanks for your concern by the way." Jackie rolled her eyes and had a sip of her champagne. Hopefully the drunker she got the more bearable the night would be.

"She probably just needed some time out to cast spells on innocent children and kill some kittens. Y'know, to feel happy again n all," Eric chided to the amusement of Kelso and Fez.

"That's one, Eric," Jackie warned.

Donna suddenly stood up and looked toward the gate. "Shut up you guys, Hyde and Cass are here."

Jackie's stomach dropped as Donna waved a hand over at the approaching twosome. Thankful that her back was to the crowd, Jackie prayed that the rush of blood that had rosied up her face would fuck off before Hyde and his girlfriend sat down.

"Cass, over here, by me," Donna called out, gesturing to the empty plastic chair next to her. "You guys," she said looking at Kelso, Fez and Jackie, "move down a bit would ya?"

Kelso stood up in a huff and angrily pushed his chair further down. Jackie wished she could do the same. Instead she calmly shuffled her chair closer to Eric's and waited.

It wasn't long until Hyde and Cassidy were stood by the table hand in hand. Jackie tried, and failed, to stop her head falling back and her eyes closing in utter embarrassment. She had been played. Standing there, in his fancy white shirt and tidy black jeans clutching his girlfriend's hand, Hyde didn't look like a man desperate to escape a crap relationship. He looked like a regular boyfriend.

Albeit one that fucked his ex-girlfriend senseless that morning.

"Hey everyone," Cassidy said as she took her seat next to Donna.

Everyone greeted her happily and did the usual 'how are you?', 'what have you been upto?' crap; well all except Jackie. She just smiled at the blonde and finished her champagne.

"I'm going to get a refill," she announced to her friends who weren't listening. "Righteo, back soon then."

As she passed the table earmarked for service she noticed Red's cooler bins filled with ice and topped off with champagne bottles. "This'll do," she said to no one in particular as she grabbed a bottle and took it back to her table.

Standing next to Fez she unwrapped the foil, removed the wire, and popped the cork. Sprays of wine showered her and Fez and they both giggled excitedly.

"Ooooh," Fez exclaimed, "champagne showers!"

"I know right, Fezzie," Jackie chirped, filling up her glass, "they're the best kind of showers!"

"Really, Jackie?" came a righteous voice from across the table. Jackie looked over at Donna and couldn't help but notice the serious expressions on the faces of the redhead, Cassidy, Hyde and Eric.

Jackie sat down. "Sorry."

Kelso, Fez and Jackie sat silent like good children for the next twenty minutes while Donna and Cassidy admired Cassidy's ugly green dress, and Eric and Hyde talked about something no one could hear. A few times Hyde glanced up at Jackie through shaded eyes and each time Jackie looked away. She couldn't look at him. If she did she'd cry. And if she cried her make-up would be ruined.

"This party blows," Kelso muttered, his head in his hand.

"Tell me about it," Fez agreed, twiddling his fingers.

"Yeah, it's a shame we're not adult enough to join in other conversations," Jackie said, her eyes set on Donna who shot her a confused look.

Kelso sat forward and smiled. He had a plan. Thank god. "Well, if we're not adults that means we can play childish games then doesn't it?" He pulled a hip flask of tequila out of his jacket pocket and some plastic shot glasses out of the pockets of his pants.

"It sure does amigo!" Fez's eyes lit up, Jackie giggled.

"Michael, I honestly don't know anybody else who carries glasses around in their freaking pants," she giggled. "What are we playing anyway?"

"Please not cards," Fez pleaded, "I never win at cards."

"But that's the point with drinking games, little buddy, you don't wanna win coz then you don't get drunk," Kelso explained as he filled three glasses with tequila.

Eric looked over and frowned. "Hey you guys, don't let my dad catch you with that. He said wine n beer, no spirits."

"Whatever, Eric, your mom's drinkin' spirits all the time. She's probably got some shoved down her bra as we speak," said Kelso as Jackie looked over at Kitty and decided he was probably right. "And besides, we're 21 man, we can drink what we like."

"We might be 21, but we all know Red can still kick our asses."

"You have a point, Eric," Kelso mumbled, hiding the tequila under the table.

"And Kelso you idiot, you're 22." Hyde's voice made Jackie's heart skip a beat. She dared to glance his way only to be stabbed in the heart again at the sight of Cassidy whispering in his ear.

 _Bitch._

She looked back at Kelso. "Okay, Michael, what are we playing?"

"Well if we can't play cards who's up for a little never have I ever?" Kelso suggested with a large grin on his face.

"Oh, I don't know-" Jackie started.

"Oooh I love that game, count me in," Cassidy chimed in from across the table. Jackie discretely rolled her eyes. Of course _she_ wanted to play that game.

"I'm in too," Fez said, sitting up.

"May as well," Eric shrugged.

"Yeah, pass me a glass," Donna said, nudging Kelso.

Hyde sat back and swigged his beer. "Well count me out." He glanced at Jackie as she finished off yet another glass of bubbles. She looked away again.

"I get to go first," Kelso grinned when everyone had their shot glasses ready. "Never have I ever...kissed Donna."

Eric drank his vessel.

"Boring," Fez said.

Eric went next. "Never have I ever hidden in a girl's closet."

Fez smiled. "Thank you, Eric," he said before he and Kelso drank their drinks.

"Hold up a minute, Eric. You hid in my closet plenty of times. You better drink, actually, you might as well make it two," Donna informed.

"But I was only in there hiding from your dad."

"Still hiding in a girl's closet, man," Kelso said, handing Eric another drink.

"Dammit."

A few more boring rounds played out - 'I have never worn a girl's dress' and the like - and through them Jackie watched Cassidy. She had sculled a few times - not to anything major or shocking, probably more due to the fact the questions had been lame - and for the last thirty minutes had fawned all over Hyde, desperate for his attention. He had talked to her here and there, and gone to fetch her beer. But it wasn't as though she was sitting on his lap while he ran his hands all over her. He wasn't acting like he did when he was with Jackie; or even Sam for that matter.

"My turn again!" Kelso announced, his speech already slurred. "Never have I ever done it with Hyde."

Cassidy's brown eyes shot straight to Jackie and narrowed. If Jackie wasn't feeling more drunk than Kelso sounded, she might've cared about the grieving mother's feelings. But she was, and she didn't.

"Oh that'd be me," she said, lifting the tiny glass of clear liquid to her mouth and emptying it quickly. She raised her eyebrows at Cassidy who also sculled her vessel.

Hyde stood up, grabbed his beer, and walked away.

"Good one, Jackie," Donna growled as she pushed her chair out and went after him.

Jackie laughed. "God, what did I do? It's only a game...and the truth."

"My turn!" Cassidy announced, tossing her plastic cup to Kelso for a refill. "Never have I ever kissed three of the four guys who were all just sitting around this table."

Jackie's fists clenched and she imagined smashing them into Cassidy's smug, mousey face.

"Jackie...hello? That'd be you. Drink up." Cassidy pointed to Jackie's glass.

Smiling, Jackie picked it up and sculled it back. After slamming it down on the table she said, "And it was the best kisses of their lives. Right boys?"

"Ah, yeah," Kelso mumbled, his drunken eyes darting between the two girls.

Fez smiled a triumphant smile. "Yes, they really were lovely. She tastes like strawberries, and she does this little thing with her-"

Now Jackie wanted to hurl. "Yeah okay, Fez, that's enough," she said, patting him on the arm.

Eric leaned forward. "Yeah, I think that's enough from everyone. How's about we give this game a rest?"

"Oh, but I'm just getting into it," Jackie enthused, her head spinning as Red approached the table.

"Well you can get into some of this food now, soak up some of that alcohol," Red growled, pointing at Jackie and Kelso. "Hurry up!"

Kelso and Fez stood up and followed Red to the grill while Jackie continued to sip champagne.

Her sips became large gulps when Hyde and Donna returned to the table, both with plates full of burgers and hotdogs and salads.

"Go grab something to eat," Hyde mumbled to Cassidy.

"In a sec," she replied. "I'll just finish this cigarette.

Donna looked over at Jackie. "Jackie, you need to eat something," she said.

"Oh, okay mom. I will later." God she hated it when Donna acted all superior and righteous. Especially when she was drunk. And god she was drunk.

"Well I'm going to get something." Just as Eric stood to get his food Hyde grabbed his arm and whispered in his ear. Jackie wondered what he was saying. She hoped it was that she was hot, or beautiful, or that he loved her.

God she was drunk.

"Do you think Mrs Forman will let us change the music?" she asked the table once Kelso and Fez had returned. "We've been listening to Tom Jones for like, seven hours."

No one answered her.

"Well I might just go see then." She went to stand up but was pushed back down by Eric holding a plate of BBQ.

"Eat it," he ordered.

"No thanks, I'm okay," Jackie said, still wanting to sort the music.

"Jackie, I'm under strict orders to make you eat-"

Jackie frowned. "From who? No one orders _me_ around."

Eric sighed and put the food down in front of her. "From Red, and he orders everyone around, so just freakin' eat it okay?"

"Whatever." Jackie waved a hand in his face before taking a bite of her burger. It tasted good; perhaps she did need to eat something. She still needed more wine though, and lots of it.

One burger, six flutes of champagne, two beers, and three hours later, Jackie was well and truly hammered. And so was Kelso.

They had become the self-titled dream team, successfully changing the music which subsequently drove all the old people indoors. Now, all that remained outside was the gang (plus Cassidy), half torn down party decorations (courtesy of Kelso), Elton John (on the radio), and a great big mess (mostly created by the dream team themselves).

"Oh my god, someone needs to take them home," Donna said from the table.

"We can hear you, Donna," Jackie yelled from the dance floor (grass area) that she and Kelso had created (put plastic chairs around).

"I know you can, _Jackie_ , and I repeat, someone needs to take you both home," Donna yelled back.

Through the corner of her eyes Jackie could see Hyde and Cassidy sitting side by side staring at her. Neither of them had said more than two words to each other , or anybody else, that night. They were sad, she knew that, but she still found it weird.

The drunker she had gotten the more obvious she had made her trips to the bathroom. Each time she had counted on Hyde following her and maybe ramming her up against a wall to have his wicked way with her. But each time she'd been left disappointed and the only wall action she'd seen was her trying to hold herself up against one.

So now it was just Jackie and Kelso singing Tiny Dancer to each other while he twirled her, lifted her, and held her, and the whole time she wished it was another ex-boyfriend she was dancing with. How could Hyde just sit there watching and do nothing?

 _Fuck him._

She stumbled to the table when the song ended and reached for the bottle of champagne sat in the middle. Eric whipped it away and she frowned.

"God, Eric, share," she whined.

"You've had enough, Jackie."

Kelso wrapped his arms around her from behind and lifted her off the ground. The motion made her want to be sick. "Jackie's never had enough, ain't that right, Jackie?"

"That's right, Michael,", she agreed as her head fell back on his shoulder.

Eric stood up. "Kelso, dude, she really needs to go home. We should call her a cab, none of us can drive."

"Hyde's only had a few beers, he could drive her," Fez piped up.

Cassidy shot Hyde a look and he shook his head. "Not my problem, man. I'm not driving her to Kenosha."

The tears were coming and Jackie wasn't sure she had the willpower to stop them. God she hated him.

"Call us a cab, Forman." Kelso set Jackie down but kept his arms around her. She buried her face in his chest unwilling to look at anyone, especially not Hyde. "Jackie can come home with me," he grinned.

Eric went inside to call the cab while Donna collected up Jackie's things and placed them in her handbag.

"I'll call you in the morning, Jackie. You're gonna have a killer headache, girl," she said, draping the handbag over Jackie's arm. "Kelso, you better look after her."

"C'mon big red," he winked. "You know I'll take good care of her, I did it for years didn't I?" He scooped Jackie up in his arms and she slung a floppy arm around his neck. The night sucked but at least she didn't have to walk.

"That's what I'm afraid of," Donna sighed.

Hyde got up and walked over to them, his hands shoved in his pockets. Jackie hoped he was coming to grab her and run away with her but she had a sneaky feeling that wasn't going to happen.

He stared at Kelso. "You got enough money for the cab?" he asked.

"No, Hyde, I don't." Kelso stuck his hand out and Jackie waited for the burn or fist Hyde would surely throw his friend's way. What Hyde did next surprised her.

He pulled a fifty dollar note out of his wallet and shoved it in Kelso's open hand. "Catch ya later, man." He winked at Jackie before turning and walking back to his seat next to Cassidy.

Now she really wanted to cry. Hyde had essentially paid Kelso to take her away. Asshole!

Headlights in the driveway signalled the arrival of the cab and the departure of Kelso and Jackie. Everyone called their goodbyes but Jackie ignored them and wrapped her arms tighter around her ex-boyfriend's neck. Placing a kiss on his cheek she thanked god for having him in her life.

"Thank you, Michael," she whispered into his ear as he carried her across the yard.

He smiled. "No problem, Jackie."

* * *

 _A/N: Uh-oh...what's gonna happen when Kelso takes Jackie home? Why was Hyde being a weirdo at the party? What's Cassidy got to say about it all? Stay tuned for the next episode which is coming soon (and leave a review n tell me what you think!). x_


	10. Chapter 10

_A/N: Sorry for delayed update...Xmas shopping + Xmas parties + Xmas hangovers = No time on the computer. Sorry!_

* * *

 _Friday, July 31st, 1981_

 _10.45pm_

 _Forman Residence_

Hyde's grip on the neck of his beer bottle tightened as he watched Jackie kiss Kelso's cheek. He didn't need to look down to know his hand was probably turning white, and he didn't want to look down anyway; he was far too preoccupied with the couple hopping into the waiting cab. It took all the self-control he had to not smash the glass bottle against the white wooden fence that lined the Forman's garden. He knew he couldn't, there'd be too many questions, too many raised suspicions.

Sitting next to him Cassidy lit a cigarette. "Wow, Jackie is a mess," she laughed.

Hyde kept his mouth shut as he clenched the bottle tighter, if that was even possible.

"Yeah, she is," Donna said as she sat back down. "She's not usually like that, I can't understand what's got into her."

Hyde knew what'd gotten into her. She was pissed at him.

"Isn't it obvious? She has a sad, lonely life and gets drunk to make herself feel better, only she ends up making a fool of herself," said Cassidy through fits of giggles.

Donna shook her head and picked up her beer. "But that's just it, everything's been going great for Jackie lately. She has a great job, friends, her own apartment...hell, she's even been dating, I can't see what could be bothering her."

Dating? When had she been going on dates? The news threw Hyde off for a moment but he remained Zen and sipped his beer.

"Don't worry about her," Eric chimed in, "she probably just missed out on some big sale and had to drown her sorrows. She'll be fine tomorrow."

"But going home with Kelso...I don't know that we should've let her go, what if she regrets it in the morning?" The lines on Donna's forehead deepened as she peered over at the driveway and the fading lights of the cab. She was worried.

So was Hyde.

Cassidy scoffed. "But isn't that her thing? Feel down - fuck Kelso?"

Hyde's blood was boiling now.

"I wish her thing was 'feel down - fuck Fez'," Fez sighed from his spot next to Eric.

"Hey." Hyde spoke through a large lump in his throat. "If she's hookin' up with that moron again then at least every other guy's safe. I say let's drop it n let'em have each other."

Cassidy's smile grew wider and she reached over and rubbed Hyde's thigh with her hand. Her touch made his skin crawl but if it meant she was buying his crap then the heebie jeebies were totally worth it.

"I s'pose you're right," Donna said, looking over at Hyde. "But whatever happens I know I'll need to set two hours aside tomorrow morning to hear all about it. It's either gonna be _'Donna, why did you let me go home with Michael, Donna?',_ or, _'Donna, I love Michael, Donna, we're picking out china patterns for the wedding tomorrow._ "

Everyone laughed at Donna's Jackie impersonation, even Hyde. The redhead really did have Jackie down pat.

"Well," Hyde said, standing up, "as entertaining as this has all been we need to be making tracks."

"What? Already?" Cassidy asked. "It's only 10.30."

"Closer to 11 by my watch." Hyde had to get out of there. It'd been cool hanging with the guys, chilling, and having them treat him normal for once, but he was done. Especially with Cassidy.

Eric handed him a fresh beer. "Just stay for one more, we haven't hung in ages"

"Yeah, we can change the sounds now that the dream team are gone," Donna offered.

"Thanks, but no thanks," Hyde said pulling his keys out of his pocket. "I gotta get home. Got a busy day tomorrow."

Cassidy stood up and reached for her handbag. Thank god she wasn't gonna fight him. "What have we got on tomorrow?" she asked.

"Dunno what you're doin' but I have to help W.B move."

"Really?" asked Eric, "Where's he moving to now?"

Hyde shrugged. "Don't know logistics, Forman, just know he needs my ute." He turned to Cassidy. "You ready?"

"Sure am, hun," she smiled.

Hyde waited in the Camino while Cassidy thanked his friends and kissed them all goodbye. Fuck she was full of crap, and if they all knew the shit she'd said about them behind their backs they'd be more inclined to slap her than kiss her. She climbed into the car and shuffled right over to him, he tensed as her leg touched his.

"So, where am I taking you?" he asked, pulling out of the Forman's street.

Cassidy looked at him puzzled. "I thought we were going home?"

"I can drop you there but I gotta get to W.B's. He wants to start moving at 7 in the morning n I'm not drivin' all the way to Milwaukee first thing, I'm gonna head out there tonight." Hyde cleared his throat as Cassidy placed her head on his arm.

"Awww, but I wanted to spend the night with you," she whined. "It was nice being out together don't you think?"

Hyde shrugged. "I can think of other things I'd rather be doing."

Cassidy sat up abruptly and pounded her fist into his arm. The physical pain was minimal; nothing in comparison to the emotional hurt he'd been feeling lately.

"Fuck you, Hyde," she spat.

Hyde ignored her insult, his focus was solely on the dark, empty road ahead.

"You're not still hung up on her are you?" Cassidy asked as she tucked some fly away strands of her blonde bob behind her ear. "She's obviously not into you anymore. She wants Kelso, like she always has. You're a fool if you think you have a shot with her."

Pulling the Camino into the narrow driveway of their home Hyde turned to look at her. "I don't give a fuck what Jackie does. I haven't cared for a long time," he lied. "Now are you gettin' out here or am I dropping you at your booze hag mate's?"

Cassidy opened the door. "I'll get out here, one of 'em will come pick me up. Mustn't hold you up any longer than I already have."

"Bye, dear," Hyde smiled sarcastically as she slammed the door and scowled at him. Fuck he hated her. Always had, always would. She had screwed everything up for him and he couldn't seem to find a way to put any of it right.

...

 _(Flashback)_

 _Tuesday, April 14th, 1981_

 _Hyde & Cassidy's House_

 _Hyde sat on his old sofa, blanketed in an overwhelming sense of protectiveness for the tiny baby cradled in his arms. He had tuned out the incessant chatter drifting from the television in the corner, his sole focus lay on his son and the milky, newborn smell drifting off of him. 'Three's Company' and Suzanne Somer's perky boob's just weren't important anymore._

 _The 10 days since little Johnny had been born had been 10 days of pure bliss. Hyde had taken time off from the store, leaving Randy in charge, and had taken to fatherhood surprisingly easily. Changing diapers was no problem and thanks to Cassidy's refusal to breastfeed he was also able to feed his son the bottle. Yeah, he could do this father business with his eyes closed, and on his own, the latter something he was gearing up to do._

 _If only Cassidy would put his name on the damn birth certificate._

 _As he stroked the soft, downy hair on Johnny's head Cassidy walked in. "Hey," she smiled, unbuttoning her grey overcoat. "How's he been?"_

 _"He's been great." Hyde looked at Johnny then up at the baby's mother. While he didn't love his girlfriend in any sense of the word, Hyde found he had been better able to tolerate her since Johnny's birth. Maybe the baby had softened him a little._

 _Not that he'd ever admit it._

 _"Where did you get to?" he asked._

 _"Oh just out n about," she answered, flopping down next to him on the couch._

 _The smell of cigarette smoke permeated from her clothes and Hyde pulled Johnny closer to him. "Go take a shower, man, you stink of smoke."_

 _"Chill out, a bit of smoke won't do him any harm. Here," she began as she put her arms out to take the baby, "give him to me. I want a cuddle."_

 _"Not until you've cleaned yourself up," Hyde demanded._

 _Cassidy rolled her eyes and smiled. "You're so overprotective, Hyde."_

 _"So?" He kissed the top of his son's warm head as Cassidy got up to take a shower. "Hey," he called before she left the room. "Have you found that birth registration form yet? We need'a get my name on it and send it in this week."_

 _Cassidy waved a dismissive hand and carried on toward the bathroom. "Oh it's around here somewhere. I'll find it when you stop nagging me about it."_

 _Hyde sighed and continued stroking Johnny's sweet little face. He was sick of asking for that damn form and hearing the same old answer._

 _He'd fucking find it himself._

 _Once Johnny was tucked in his crib Hyde walked into the room he shared with Cassidy and flicked the light on. He opened a few drawers in her dresser and rummaged through lace fingerless gloves, and tacky - even by his standards - lingerie before realising his search was probably useless. He'd spent yesterday searching the kitchen drawers and came up with nothing._

 _The form was gone._

 _Quickly checking the small cubby in Cassidy's nightstand, Hyde was intrigued to find a large, leather bound, black diary hidden under a pile of magazines. He'd never seen the book before and it's worn cover and frayed edges told him it probably held some years old secrets. The sound of the shower running made the temptation to open the gold leaf pages too hard to refuse so he sat down on his thin mattress and opened the cover. He swallowed hard as he carefully turned the first page and saw, t_ _o his horror , that each page after that was filled with photo after photo of him and Jackie._

 _Some were of them together._

 _Some were of them on their own._

 _Some were taken years ago during their school days._

 _Others were taken only a few months ago._

 _However each and every picture of Jackie had been defaced, and a_ _ccompanying each photo were cruel words scribbled in Cassidy's erratic handwriting describing her hate towards his ex-girlfriend._

 _It was more than Hyde could bare to see, or read._

 _This shit was fucked up._

 _He stared at a photo taken of him and Jackie, shopping for a crib for Johnny, for what felt like an eternity. Jackie's perfect face had been scratched out and was now a fluffy, white mess of paper. He covered his mouth with his trembling hand hoping to muffle the scream that so desperately wanted to escape him. What the fuck had he gotten himself into? It wasn't enough for Cassidy to physically remove Jackie from his life; she obviously still took some sick pleasure in ruining pictures of her too and keeping the evidence of her hate close._

 _In a fit of rage Hyde stomped across the hall and kicked the bathroom door open. "What the fuck is this shit?" he yelled at a towel clad Cassidy as he held the book in the air._

 _Her eyes widened and her mouth moved to say something. But no words left her mouth._

 _He shoved the book in her face. "What is this, Cassidy?" he screamed again._

 _"I...I...just..."_

 _"You just what? You just happened to be fuckin' stalking me n my girlfriend for the last 3 years?"_

 _Cassidy clutched her towel tightly, wet beads dripping from her face. "I hate her, Hyde. I hate her so much."_

 _Hyde was shaking in anger, his fist clenched at his side. "So? I hate plenty of people, but I don't go round takin' photos of them n stickin' them into books! What the hell did she ever do to you?"_

 _Puffing her chest out and straightening her back, Cassidy finally looked ready to spill. "Jackie Burkhart is an evil cow n I hate her."_

 _"Many people have said that over the years but I bet they don't have anything like this," Hyde fumed, gesturing at the fucked up pages in his hand._

 _"She humiliated me at high school and made sure nobody liked me, all because she found out I had a crush on you. She could'a dropped it, just warned me off, but no, she had to make sure everybody thought I was an idiot. I was the biggest loser at Point Place high thanks to her."_

 _Knowing the extreme Jackie had gone to to ensure Cassidy stayed away from Hyde was kind of an ego boost but Hyde had to stop his swelling head and sort out his psycho 'girlfriend'._

 _"So what? Big deal. She was a kid and that was high school, who gives a fuck?"_

 _Cassidy's eyes narrowed. "I do...I give a fuck. I hate that bitch."_

 _"So is that what all this was about? You getting pregnant to me, holding my son as leverage, forcing me to leave Jackie...was this all just some big vendetta against her coz she was mean to you?" She made him sick. Cassidy literally made Hyde wanna hurl all over their pale pink bathroom._

 _"No, not at all." Cassidy walked toward him. He took a step back. "I love you, Hyde. I've always loved you. I just had to make you see how good we could be together. You and Jackie were all wrong for each other -"_

 _"But I love Jackie. I don't love you, Cassidy."_

 _Cassidy's face froze before a scowl appeared. "But we have a son together. We're a family."_

 _She was a psycho, well and truly. How the hell did she think they were a family? She had blackmailed him into being with her and to top it off was a freaking stalker. His own mom was a saint compared to this chick._

 _"Yes we have a son together, but no, we're not a family," Hyde explained as he folded his arms over the book on his chest. "You see, I can and will leave with my boy as soon as possible. It won't be hard. No judge would give you custody once they knew how much shit you snort up your nose-"_

 _"And no judge would give you custody because you're not even on Johnny's birth certificate. Just try n prove you're his dad."_

 _Hyde closed his eyes and through gritted teeth said, "Fuck you're a bitch."_

 _Cassidy shrugged. "And you're stuck with me. Oh, and if you think this was fucked up," she said as she pulled the diary from Hyde's arms, "just wait n see what I'll do to your precious Jackie if you ever try n go back to her. Me, you n Johnny, Hyde, we're a family, so get used to it."_

 _(End flashback)_

 _..._

As Hyde walked up the steps to Jackie's apartment memories of the night he'd discovered Cassidy was a crazy stalker washed over him. The couch had become his bed from that night on, only ever sleeping in his room if Cassidy was passed out in the living room after one of her benders. He didn't mind the lumpy old couch, it was better than sleeping with her. But sleeping in a bed with Jackie only last night had reminded him of what he'd been missing out on.

And he didn't ever wanna miss out on a night with his doll again.

His heartbeat sped up as he knocked on her door and waited, the uncertainty of not knowing what he would be met with playing havoc on his mind.

When the door swung open Hyde winced. "Put some fuckin' clothes on," he said as he pushed past Kelso and walked into the living room.

Kelso shut the door and rubbed his sleepy eyes. "I have clothes on, _Hyde._ "

"Put more clothes on," Hyde grumbled eyeing Kelso's bare chest and Playboy boxers. "How is she?" He nodded toward Jackie's closed bedroom door knowing his girl had probably cried herself to sleep. He couldn't wait to get in there and hold her again.

Kelso fell back on the sofa and pulled the woollen blanket back over him before fluffing his pillow dramatically. "She's not good, dude. Cried all the way home n didn't stop going on about how much she hates you."

Hyde sighed as he leaned against the kitchen counter. "Did you tell her anything?" he asked.

"No, you told me not to."

"You don't usually do what I tell you."

"Well I did this time." Kelso closed his eyes obviously wanting to go back to sleep.

"What are ya doin', man?" Hyde asked. "I'm here now, you can go."

Kelso's eyes opened and he stared at Hyde blankly. "I'm not going anywhere. It's 11.30. How am I meant to get back to Point Place?"

"Same way you got here," Hyde said tossing Kelso's pants at him. "Which reminds me, where's my change for the cab?"

"Damn, Hyde! I do you the favour tonight, look after Jackie for you and now you're trying to make me leave? I don't think so," Kelso moaned as he pulled the blanket up high around his face. Hyde knew he was right; Kelso had done him the favour and fooled Cassidy into believing something was going on between him and Jackie. He'd also asked Hyde very few questions as to why he was asked to do the things he'd done. He'd just been a good friend and done what Hyde needed him to do.

Hyde hadn't asked him to be so handsy though.

"Ow!" Kelso yelped, quickly rubbing his arm. "What the hell was that for?"

Hyde smirked. It always felt good to frog Kelso, especially if the frog had to do with Jackie. "You didn't need to touch her as much as you did," Hyde growled.

"I was playing a role, dude." Kelso was still rubbing his arm on his bed on the couch. "And did everyone not buy it?"

Hyde nodded.

"Then I played my role well. You shouldn't be punching me, you should be thanking me-"

"But I didn't ask you to put your grubby mits all over her!"

Kelso held up a hand, ordering Hyde to back off, and closed his eyes. "Jackie's home, safe n sound. Cassidy thinks we're hooking up. Everyone bought it. Now I don't know what all this was about, but I do know that I'm not cabbing all the way home now, I'm going to sleep. So, goodnight, Hyde," he said as he turned around and faced the back of the couch.

Hyde opened his mouth, ready to yell at Kelso and tell him to get up and get out. But, truth be told, he couldn't be bothered. All he really wanted to do was sort things with Jackie.

Turning off the living room light and walking towards her room he hoped like hell she would give him the chance to explain, because he sure as hell couldn't bear the thought of anymore nights without her.


	11. Chapter 11

The second Hyde opened Jackie's bedroom door the sweet aroma of her perfume filled his nostrils and he immediately felt calm. Just a hint of her fragrance lulled him into a peaceful sense of security. But he knew she'd be pissed at him, so he had to shake off the desire to grab her and kiss her. There was some serious work, or rather, some serious grovelling to do on his part before he would have the luxury of being intimate with her again.

He grinned when his tired eyes fell on the fully clothed woman snoring softly on top of her comforter. Sprawled across the bed, with her hair an untamed mess of tangles and bumps, Jackie was a far cry from her usual perfectly coiffed self. Sitting down next to her Hyde gently lifted her foot, which was dangling over the side of the bed, and slipped off her shoe. She'd hate seeing herself in this state. Even while sleeping Jackie still liked to assume she was movie star gorgeous and she'd die if she knew a small trail of dribble was currently making it's way out of her mouth and onto her pillow.

"Silly girl," Hyde mumbled as he removed her other shoe and threw it next to it's partner on the floor. As he attempted to remove Jackie's dress Donna's words rang through his mind. _'Everything's been going great for Jackie lately...great job, friends, dating...'._ What had he done to her? Why did he always have to push her to rock bottom? Okay, maybe this time she hadn't flashed a pub full of people, but she'd still ended up in a drunken, incoherent state all because of him.

Could she take anymore of his crap?

Did she deserve to?

As he wangled her arms out of her dress a small sigh escaped her pink lips. "Jackie? Wake up, babe," Hyde whispered holding her head in his hands. Her eyes fluttered open for a moment and stared blankly at him before closing again. He pulled the dress over her head and quickly replaced it with her nightgown, his eyes careful not to linger too long on her perfect breasts. "Babe, wake up, I wanna talk to you." Now there was a turn up for the books - Hyde wanted to talk - it was just a shame the only person in the world he wanted to talk to was too wasted to listen or talk back. He kissed her forehead, lay her back down on her pillow, and smiled. Now she looked more like a movie star. "Okay then, you just sleep n we'll talk tomorrow," he said, tucking the comforter around her.

After going to the kitchen for water and painkillers and placing them on Jackie's nightstand, Hyde sat back down next to her on the bed. Gently stroking her soft, shiny hair he contemplated his next move. He could leave now, walk out of her life for good, and let her carry on with her great life without him. It'd only been a week of 'togetherness', surely it wouldn't take long for her to recover from his latest shenanigans and forget all about him. Then he could go back to his shitty life and push his feelings for her away like he'd done so many other times. The problem was, as he'd discovered all those other times, those feelings always came back because he fucking hated his life without her. No amount of strippers, wives, baby mamas and country music could ever replace what he had with Jackie. He was only half a person without her, and that half was the half he didn't like so much. Angry, bitter, cynical Hyde, the one who rarely smiled, the one who rarely cared. He needed Jackie to complete him...he just wasn't so sure she needed him.

...

 _Saturday, August 1st, 1981_

 _Jackie's Apartment_

Hyde awoke to the sound of Abba blaring from the living room, and the sun's bright light piercing his eyes. Alone in Jackie's bed he sighed, deciding that he'd gone to sleep in heaven with her in his arms, and woken up in hell. Grabbing his jeans off the floor he put them on and made his way to the kitchen hoping to find his girl in a good mood. Perhaps on the way he might even be able to change the music.

As he walked into the living room the sight of Jackie sitting at the kitchen counter eating muesli made his stomach flutter. Her hair was swept up in a ponytail, her legs, only covered by a pair of short hotpants, were bronzed and smooth and just waiting to be touched. It was as if he'd just left hell and waltzed into paradise. He pulled up a chair to face her and threw an arm around her chair.

"Mornin'," he grinned. Jackie didn't look at him, instead she continued to chew her food while flicking through a Vogue magazine. Hyde leaned down and kissed her exposed shoulder. "Jackie, I said mornin'," he said again in-between kisses.

Jackie jerked her shoulder as if ridding herself of an annoying fly, her leg swinging rapidly. "I heard you the first time," she muttered.

With some trepidation Hyde put his hand at the nape of her neck and gently rubbed. "Babe," he said quietly, "I'm sorry about the bbq okay? Can we just talk about it?"

Jackie flicked the page and feigned interest in an ad for toothpaste. "Nothing to talk about."

He'd kiss her shoulder again, perhaps have a go at her neck as well, surely that'd get her. "C'mon, Jackie, don't be mad," he said through lazy kisses and licks, "I came back didn't I?" He felt her chest rise as she inhaled a large hit of air. He was fucked.

"What?!" she bellowed, her shoulders dropping as she exhaled through the word. Hyde quickly sat up and moved his face out of her firing line. "Am I supposed to _thank you_ for coming and sleeping in my bed after you'd ignored me for five hours? You only came here because you wanted to get laid again... _as if_ I'd let you touch me with those grubby hands after they'd been all over _her!_ " Jackie stood up and walked around the counter into the kitchen, throwing her bowl into the sink.

"Jackie, c-mon-"

Just then Kelso walked into the kitchen wearing a towel. Hyde rolled his eyes at the irony. "Wait," Kelso said as he rubbed his wet hair with a smaller towel, "did I just hear you say 'get laid a _gain_ ', Jackie? Have you two been doin' it?" His brown eyes darted between Jackie and Hyde whose own eyes darted everywhere but in the direction of each other.

"That's none of your business, Michael." Jackie was propped up against the counter biting on her fingernail. Hyde could tell it wasn't just anger bubbling away in her pretty little body, she was nervous as well.

Hyde looked at Kelso. "Yeah, Kelso, we've been doing it-"

"Steven! Shut your mouth!"

"What? It's the truth!"

Jackie's shaky eyes fell on Kelso. "We only did it once, Michael."

Hyde shrugged. "Still did it."

Unable to conceal the smirk that crossed his face whenever he thought of sex with Jackie, Hyde watched as she crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes at him. "It was a momentary lapse of judgement, Steven, so claim it all you want, coz it'll _never_ happen again."

Hyde had plenty of quick comebacks that he could've thrown at her, but now was not the time, so instead he dropped the smirk and cleared his throat.

"Woah!" Kelso exclaimed with a dramatic nod of his head. "Are we back on this merry-go-round again? As much as I'd like to help sort this mess out for you two I really feel it's beyond fixing, so, Jackie, hows about making me a coffee huh?"

Beyond fixing? Kelso needed to shut the hell up before Jackie started believing the idiot.

Jackie smiled and reached for a cup. "Of course, _Michael,_ I'd love to make you a coffee. After all, you did take care of me last night didn't you?" She winked up at Kelso as he stood there grinning like a dick. Hyde wanted to punch him straight in his pretty boy face.

"Yes, Jackie, I did take care of you last night. So feel free to rustle me up some of that bacon I saw in the fridge earlier too."

"Anything for you, Michael," Jackie said, opening the fridge.

"Will you two knock it off!" Hyde stood up. "Why don't ya tell her why you looked after her huh, _Michael_?" He turned to Jackie. "It wasn't coz he gave a shit, Jackie, it was coz I told him to."

Kelso, obviously concerned about his breakfast, reached into the open fridge and grabbed the bacon, handing it to Jackie. "But I still cared, Jackie, I would'a done it whether he'd told me to or not."

Jackie eyed both of the men in her kitchen suspiciously, one hand on the fridge handle, the other holding a soggy packet of bacon. "I don't get it?"

Hyde pushed the fridge closed and put his hands on her small hips. "Look, I knew I was gonna have to ignore you at the party coz of Cassidy, so I went n saw Kelso yesterday and told him to keep an eye on you...make sure you were okay..."

"But you were holding her hand -"

"She was holdin' _my_ hand."

"And you didn't even look at me."

"Every chance I could I did."

"And you paid Michael to take me home." Jackie's voice was soft. The shrillness was gone, replaced with a sadness that tore at Hyde's insides. He gently pushed her back against the wall and stared into her doe eyes.

"Jackie," he said quietly, aware of Kelso standing behind him, "I didn't 'pay him to take you home', I gave him money to make sure you got home safely. I knew I'd be comin' here straight after the party, so did he." His fingertips lightly brushed her cheek and her eyes closed slightly.

"But...you _ignored_ me like I was...was...nothing."

"You're not...hold up." Hyde suddenly turned around and frogged Kelso hard in the arm. "Kelso, get outta here would ya? And put some freakin' clothes on!"

"Could'a asked nicely!" Kelso cried, furiously rubbing the red mark forming on his arm. He stomped his foot and turned to leave the kitchen, stopping just by the door. Looking back at Jackie he said "So, Jackie, I'll be in the living room when you're ready with that coffee n bacon."

Hyde's lips thinned. "Kelso!"

"Going!"

Once the moron was safely out of earshot Hyde's eyes fell once more on Jackie. "So," he started, as his hand crept up into her hair, "where was I? Oh, that's right, I acted like you were nothing right?" Jackie nodded. "You went to the bathroom eight times last night, Jackie, three of those times you forgot your purse." Jackie's mouth opened, Hyde placed a finger over it to silence her. "You drank two bottles of wine, three beers, and four shots of tequila, and I must say, after all that booze I'm more than a little surprised you're up this early today -"

"Steven, it's 12.30 -"

"Sssh, like I said, I'm surprised you're up so early," Hyde continued. "The burger you ate only had a beef pattie, ketchup, and cheese on it -"

Jackie narrowed her eyes. "How do you know that?"

Hyde grinned. "Because I told Forman to make it for you n I know you hate the way lettuce goes slimy in warm burgers."

The corner of Jackie's mouth turned up, indicating that Hyde was finally making some headway. "You told Eric to get me something to eat?"

"Of course I did. You were on your way to gettin' wasted, you needed to soak up some of that alcohol." Hyde's hand on her hip slowly moved further around her back and he pulled her closer.

"So, you were watching me all night, counting how many times I went to the bathroom even?" Her eyebrows were angrily arched but her mouth was telling a different story. She couldn't get rid of that smile if she tried. And Hyde knew she was trying.

"Yip," he said proudly. "Now is that _really_ ignoring you?"

"Steven, all you did was watch me and made sure I ate something. You just don't get it do you? I had to sit there and watch everyone fuss over your girlfriend and you didn't even speak to me...you didn't even smile at me. How do you think that made me feel?" Jackie's hand was on his chest now trying to push him away. He wasn't letting her go.

"Jackie, we talked about this, I just need some time to figure out how I can leave her okay? Until then things are gonna have to be like this." He stroked her face, she quickly turned away.

"Well I don't think I can do 'this'," she said using air quotes. "'This' is too hard and I'm worth more than 'this'."

...

Jackie pushed Hyde away and he finally let her go. Was he not going to fight for her? Was he really done? She ignored the dejected look on his face as she busied herself finding a frying pan to cook Kelso's breakfast. God she hated cooking. Damn Steven for being so much of an asshole that it forced her to be nice to Michael.

"How many pieces of toast?" she called out to her ex-boyfriend while her other one stood in the kitchen watching her.

"Three!" Kelso called back from the living room, "and two eggs."

Jackie giggled. "Michael, you're allergic to eggs!"

"Oh yeah! I always forget about that!"

She glanced at Hyde whose eyes were rolling into the back of his head. "God he's a moron," he muttered, "I can't believe you're making him breakfast."

"Technically it's lunch," Jackie said as she dropped bacon into the hot pan.

"Technically you shouldn't be doing it."

Jackie watched as Hyde sat himself up on the counter and folded his arms. He looked pissed off, with his tightly pursed lips and puffed out chest.

"Someone jealous coz they're not getting food cooked for them by moi?" she asked.

"I don't give a crap who you cook for, n besides, you're the one that's all jealous -"

Jackie slammed the fish slice on the stove, the sharp noise it made making her wince. "Really, Steven? You're really gonna go there with me _now_?" How dare he get nasty with her. She'd only ever tried to be a supportive friend and help him through his grief and now she was the one being put through the wringer.

He sighed heavily and looked at the floor. "No. No I'm not gonna go there with you now."

Wow, Hyde's lack of fight actually surprised her. It wasn't often Steven Hyde backed down, didn't demand the last word, didn't go for the jugular forcing her into a crying heap of the floor. But then she was kidding herself if she hadn't noticed that her ex-boyfriend had changed. He had grown, softened even. Being a father had worn down some of his sharp edges making it easier for her to get close to him. Now the biggest barrier to Steven's heart was Cassidy, and Jackie didn't have a file big enough to smooth that skank down.

Jackie cleared her throat and watched the bacon sizzle. "Um, would you like a coffee, Steven?" she asked.

"You gonna make me one?"

She turned around in time to meet his unshaded gaze and found that instead of the bright blue she loved so much his eyes were a dull shade of grey. He was heartbroken over his son and here she was making everything about her. But she couldn't, and wouldn't, be somebody's booty call just because they were going through a tough time.

She could go back to being his friend though.

"Of course I'll make you one, I'm not a complete bitch," she smiled as she pulled two cups out of the cupboard.

"Jackie," Hyde said quietly, "you're not a bitch at all."

...

Jackie sat down on the couch, picked up her Vogue magazine and began flicking through the pages. As much as the latest summer fashions excited her, Steven Hyde was far more intriguing so she couldn't help glancing over at him every five seconds. He was sitting on a chair by the door, his face expressionless, his fingers rapping his knee.

"Well I'm full," Kelso stated, putting his empty plate on the coffee table. "Thanks for that, Jackie. Now that I know you can cook I'll be around here more often.

Jackie smiled. "Thank you, Michael, I'm pleased you enjoyed it." Kelso's glowing cuisine review wasn't worth much, but it was still nice to hear.

"I did enjoy it, maybe next time add a few fried tomatoes, maybe a sausage or two -"

"Okay Michael, I get it," Jackie said with a snarl, "now you can do the washing up."

Kelso shook his head and rubbed his tummy. "No can do sorry, Jackie. I've got a date with Eric, Fez, a slingshot, and a pack of bottle rockets." He glanced at his watch. "You ready, Hyde? I still gotta stop at my place and get changed so we needa go."

Jackie's pulse quickened and she could do little to stop the small gasp that escaped her lips. She was mad with Hyde, but she didn't want him to leave, well not yet anyway.

Hyde was grinning at Kelso, completely oblivious to Jackie's full blown panic attack. "A slingshot _and_ bottle rockets?" he questioned. "Where are you guys doin' this? Man, I want in." Jackie's face fell, god he was as stupid as Kelso.

"Water tower, dude. Straight off the top."

"Michael, you do realise it hasn't rained in days, so the ground is dry -"

"Which is the perfect environment for what you wanna do, man," Hyde cut Jackie off and gave her a sly wink.

Kelso nodded with childlike enthusiasm. "So does that mean you're in, Hyde?"

Jackie waited for his answer with baited breath.

"Nah, man, as exciting as that sounds I got some stuff to do with Jackie, might catch you guys up later though."

Jackie exhaled as quietly as she could, relieved that he still wanted to salvage something between them; even if it couldn't be the romantic relationship she'd been dreaming about for the last three years.

Kelso stood and picked up his blazer, flinging it over his shoulder. "Hyde, my man, you don't know what you're missing out on."

To Jackie's surprise Hyde removed his shades and leaned forward, staring right at her. "Oh yes I do, Kelso," he said, never taking his eyes off Jackie who currently felt like she was melting into the sofa. Hyde waggled his eyebrows and winked at her before grabbing her hand and pulling her up. "But, know this," he said, still talking to Kelso but looking at Jackie, "I won't be missin' out for too much longer."

"Ahh, yeah, I don't get what the hell you're on about so I'm gonna go wait at the car."

Jackie briefly glanced in Kelso's direction as he walked out to the hallway, but her pounding heart and blurred vision meant she cared very little about what he was doing, and a whole lot more about what Hyde was saying. The warmth of his hands creeping up her back was driving her crazy and she stroked his cheeks, fascinated that what only a week ago was covered in stubble, was now covered by a fully grown beard. God Steven was such a man.

He pulled her flush against him. "I'm gonna go ahead n assume I'm forgiven," he smiled, a hint of blue returning to his gorgeous eyes.

"What did you mean before?" Jackie asked, still stroking his beard. "What aren't you going to be missing out on for much longer?" He must have a plan. Surely he'd come up with a plan.

Before Hyde answered he kissed her softly on the lips and her knees went weak. She was a fool for ever believing she could only be friends with him.

"You," he finally said. "I'm not missin' out on you for much longer." He kissed her again, this time using his tongue to pry open her lips. His mouth was warm, his tongue was urgent, and his hands were roaming. Jackie giggled internally as Hyde's hands cupped her ass and lifted her up; they were never, and could never be friends. The spark between them was electric and the smallest kiss always led to an explosion. Nope, she wasn't giving this up.

Hyde carried her to the doorway much to her annoyance. Feeling frustrated she pulled away from his kiss and frowned. "Steven," she said, her arms locked tightly around his neck. "Where the hell are we going? The couch is right there."

He smiled and pecked her lips. "We're gonna go drop that moron off then I'm gonna tell you my plan."

Jackie's face lit up. "You have a plan?"

"I always have a plan, babe." Hyde pulled the door closed behind them while Jackie clung to him, hoping like hell his plan meant she could have him forever.


	12. Chapter 12

_A/N: I'm so sorry for the delay! My only excuse is Christmas time so I hope you'll forgive me. I've split this chapter in 2 as I didn't like it as one so it may seem like it ends abruptly. Next chapter up soon._

* * *

 _Later that day..._

"I could sit here like this forever."

"Hmmm, I guess." Hyde smiled, tightening his grip around Jackie's waist. "It'd get kinda boring though."

"Not for me it wouldn't."

Hyde warily lifted his head and took in his surroundings. The lake was beautiful, and not even in a girly kind of way. The view from the shore was like something from a postcard, all picturesque and perfect, but it wasn't the view that drew Hyde to the place; he came to the lake because it was familiar, and safe, and comfortable. Much like the girl sitting between his legs.

"Oh I think it would, Jackie, there's no mall here remember."

Jackie chuckled and placed her soft, warm hands over Hyde's. "Oh, Steven," she said, "I don't need shopping to entertain me. If you and I were stuck here forever I'd be fine with it."

Her words were reassuring and as Hyde dropped desperate kisses on Jackie's neck he wondered whether now was the right time to ask her the question. They'd been at their spot at the lake for hours but the nagging uncertainty of Jackie's feelings toward him had stopped him from spilling his thoughts. As always, the fear of rejection was rearing it's ugly head and halting the progression of his relationship with Jackie.

Deciding that his own insecurities were not going to ruin him and Jackie this time, Hyde cleared his throat.

"So you'd be fine if it was just me n you? No malls, no parties, no friends?" He nuzzled his head into Jackie's hair, closing his eyes as he waited for her answer.

"If I had you with me I'd be fine wherever, Steven. Although I don't know if I could give up malls n shopping completely."

Hyde opened his eyes and caught Jackie's smile as she contemplated life without spending. Of course he knew she couldn't do that, and he would never ask her to.

"But you could give up the friends if it meant we could be together?" he asked, drawing her closer into his chest.

She turned to look at him, her smile fading. "Baby, why are you asking me that? Why would I need to give up my friends for you?"

Hyde swallowed hard as he caught a wisp of her hair that'd been picked up by the light summer breeze. "I told you I have a plan right?" he asked. Jackie nodded. "I want us to leave here, Jackie, just me n you."

"Leave the lake?"

"No, babe, leave Point Place, Kenosha...freakin' Wisconsin. Start a new life somewhere else. Somewhere with a mall." He grinned and tried to ignore the worried expression on Jackie's face. Her saying no to leaving was something he'd considered but the reality of that answer scared the shit out of him. He wasn't sure he could live without her.

"Why? Why would we have to leave here? Our lives are in Wisconsin. Not just our friends, but our jobs, our families...everything."

"Which is exactly why I wanna go. Leave all the memories behind, man, start anew. Just us."

Hyde had decided days ago that Jackie never needed to know the extent of the hate directed at her courtesy of one psycho blonde. That information would only scare her so he was counting on persuading her to leave town using measures other than the fear of being attacked.

Jackie turned right around, placing her legs around Hyde's waist, and cupped his face. "Steven, you can't run from memories, baby. You are grieving, and sad, and confused -"

Hyde rolled his eyes. Of course she was gonna bring up that crap. "I'm not confused and Johnny's death has nothing to do with me wantin' us to leave," he said, semi-truthfully.

Jackie shook her head. "It has _everything_ to do with you wanting to leave. Tell me then, were you wanting to move interstate 4 weeks ago?" she asked.

"Four weeks ago I had a kid who needed me here. But I don't anymore. The situations changed."

"Exactly. Your life has changed so much in the last few weeks, baby, and I just think you need to let things settle a bit before you make any big decisions."

Hyde removed his arms from around Jackie's waist and leaned back on the log. "So you don't wanna come?" he sniped, not attempting to remove the anger from his voice.

"Steven, that's not what I'm saying -"

"So you'll come?"

Jackie smacked a hand hard on her forehead crushing Hyde's hopes once again. She was confused and agitated, that much was clear, but Hyde wasn't backing down. He needed her and was willing to let go of everything he'd spent the last few years accumulating if it meant he could have her with him.

"I'm not saying I want to come and I'm not saying I don't want to come. What I'm asking is _why_ do we need to go in the first place? And where do you think we're going anyway? Have you even thought that far ahead?"

Hyde nodded, still leaning on the log, still feigning confidence in his plan. "I have actually. We're off to Seattle, babe. W.B has a couple of business ventures going on over there so I could easily get a job, and I'd bet my life that there are radio stations there too," he said with a grin.

Jackie narrowed her eyes and pursed her lips and Hyde couldn't help but be a little annoyed. Why did she have to be so damn difficult?

"Steven, Seattle is like 2000 miles away -"

"Yeah, cool huh?" Hyde figured two thousand miles was surely enough distance to deter Cassidy and her camera from anymore stalking.

"But that's so many miles between us and our friends. You need your friends, especially now."

"No, Jackie, I need you and a fresh start. So are you gonna come or not?"

Hyde watched as Jackie began to lightly chew on her bottom lip. Nervous. She was nervous. The churning of his stomach indicated to him that he too was nervous. He needed her to agree to leaving. He needed to be away from this town and Cassidy.

He needed Jackie to say yes.

For what felt like an eternity Jackie chewed on her lip and stared at the mottle grey pebbles that lined the lakeside, while Hyde stared at her waiting for some kind of sign that she loved him and would leave with him. He knew it was a big ask. He knew she didn't owe him anything. He knew she probably trusted him as far as she could throw him. But still he waited, hoping that this time the stars would align in their favour and allow them to be together.

Finally Jackie looked up, her green eyes glassy with threatening tears. "When," she softly asked. "When would you want to go?"

Hyde's chest rose and his arms shot around Jackie's little waist. "As soon as possible, babe. Tonight, tomorrow...as soon as you can leave." he couldn't stop the smile that crept over his face as he imagined a future with his girl. Just them. No crazy ex-girlfriends, no moron ex-boyfriends. The only thing that could make it anymore perfect was if he still had his son with him.

"I'd need to give work some notice, maybe a week?" Jackie said, her hands lightly stroked his forearms. "And I'd want to spend some time with Donna and the others. We couldn't just leave without saying goodbye."

"Ah, yes we can n that's exactly what we're gonna do. We can't tell anyone anything, Jackie." Telling the others would only lead to them trying to talk him and Jackie out of it and Hyde wasn't having that. It also meant there would be more chance of Cassidy finding out what he was upto and there was no way in hell he was risking anything happening to Jackie.

Quietly slipping out of town was best for everyone.

"Why not?"

Dammit, questions.

"Because, they'll try n talk us out of it," he shrugged.

"Of course they will, because it's a crazy plan," Jackie said, her eyes wide and suspicious. "And what about Cassidy? Don't you think she deserves an explanation?" A small hand quickly flew to Jackie's chest and her bottom lip began trembling. "Oh my god, Steven, I hadn't even thought about her 'til now...how can we do this to her? She's just lost her son...I can't take her man away."

Hyde grabbed Jackie's hand and softly kissed it. "Yes you can. And no, she doesn't need an explanation."

"But it's bad enough that you're going to leave her. Can't you just talk to her about all this. Maybe break up with her, move back to the Forman's, then in time we can tell her we're together...when the initial shock has worn off."

"No, Jackie, that's not gonna happen. It's this way or no way."

Pulling her hand out of Hyde's Jackie said, "Well I don't think this is fair." She looked angry, like he was some kind of heartless asshole. Little did she know he was doing all of this for her, so that they could be together. It wasn't as easy as just moving out of Cassidy's and starting a new life; the chick had been stalking him and Jackie for three years already and who was to say she wasn't gonna keep stalking them for the next three years. No, leaving town was the only way they could be sure they were free of her.

He sighed and pulled her into a hug, the strawberry scent of her shampoo invading his senses. "I'm sorry you think it's unfair, but it's how it's gotta be okay? If you don't want a secret relationship then we gotta leave."

Jackie pulled away, her face wild, her eyes darkened in anger. "What, so because I was angry about last night you're punishing me by giving me an ultimatum? Is that what this is about?

"No! God, Jackie, this isn't an ultimatum -"

"Sounds like an ultimatum to me -"

"Fuck!" Hyde stood up, unsure if he could take anymore of this conversation, and hurriedly walked to the track that led to the car. He felt sure he had given Jackie more of himself in the last week than he ever had before and now she was questioning his motives. He wasn't playing tit for tat, he was proposing a freakin' solution to their problem. But he was tired, and he was also done.

 _Fuckin' chicks._

As he made his way to the car the sound of Jackie's quick footsteps behind him made him stop. It would be easy to keep going, leave her behind, un-complicate his life a little. But as sick and tired of arguing as he was, the love he felt for her meant he couldn't keep walking away. He loved her. He had to stay and sort this with her one way or another.

Plus they'd come in his car so leaving her miles from her home would really make him an asshole.

"Steven," she whispered, her hands creeping around his waist. "I'll come."

A weight was lifted off his shoulders, quickly replaced by a rush of happiness that he was sure he felt through his entire body. "Really?"

Jackie nodded as small tears fell from her eyes. "Really."

"Tell me why," Hyde asked as Jackie stared up at him, confusion falling across her pretty face.

"Huh?"

"Tell me why you're gonna come with me." He needed to hear the words again.

Clearly unsure of what Hyde meant Jackie said the only words that came to her mind and thankfully they were the words Hyde desperately wanted to hear.

"Because I love you, Steven."


	13. Chapter 13

_A/N: Hello all! Sorry for the very late update...a mix of holidays and computer problems is my excuse. Hope you all had a great Christmas and are ready for the next chapter. It is a bit of a filler but I hope you enjoy._

 ** _Warning: rated M for smut so please don't read anything after Jackie and Hyde's little disagreement if you're under 16 or whatever. You will know when it's starting so if you're not into it (or young) please don't read any further._**

 _Thanks for the reviews, you know I love them! Happy New Year everyone!_

* * *

 _Wednesday, 5th August, 1981_

 _Forman Residence_

Warm biscuits and lemon scented cleaning products. If Jackie had to describe the smell of the Forman's home she would say, warm biscuits fresh out of the oven mixed with lemon scented, generic brand cleaning products. And as she walked into the Forman kitchen on this balmy summer's day, the smell almost magically put her at ease. Their home, with all it's tacky, old fashioned furnishings had always been a place Jackie could run to when her world fell apart. She'd come here when she'd found out her father was going to prison. She'd run here when her mother had returned from Mexico threatening to turn her life upside down. She'd fled to here from Chicago when Hyde had stormed off after finding Kelso at her door dressed only in a towel.

But now she and Steven were preparing to leave Point Place. In a few days they wouldn't have the Formans and their home to escape to anymore.

They'd be on their own.

"Hey, Mr Forman," Jackie said as she pushed the door open to the lounge.

Red was sitting in his favourite chair reading the newspaper. "Hello," he muttered without looking up. Jackie stood for a moment staring at him, wondering how long it'd take to get his full attention.

Turned out it wasn't long. The old man folded a corner of the paper down and looked up. Cocking an eyebrow he said, "The rest of the morons are down in the basement," before resuming his reading of the paper.

"Oh I know where they are," Jackie said, taking a seat on the couch closest to Red, "they're creatures of habit. It's 5.30, they've finished work, and 'I Dream of Jeanie' is on. Where else would they be?"

"Then why are you still in here yapping to me?" Red grumbled, shifting his newspaper in annoyance.

Jackie smiled and flicked her hair off her shoulder. "I can talk to them any old time, it's not often you and I get a chance to catch up on our own."

Red's eyes shot up and landed on Jackie's. "Catch up? What the hell do we have to catch up on?" he asked, completely puzzled.

"Plenty, Mr Forman," Jackie said as she crossed her legs and smoothed out her skirt. She had decided that this week she would grab any moment she could with the people she had grown to regard as family; whether they liked it or not. "For instance, I haven't asked you about work in a while. How's the new muffler shop going? What about the Packers? How was their season? Or fishing, have you been -"

Red folded his paper and slammed it down on his lap. "I cannot recall you and I ever discussing any of that crap before so can you please explain to me why we have to start now?"

Jackie swallowed hard, wishing she could explain to Red why all of a sudden she wanted to talk about boring stuff with him. But mostly, she wished she could tell him the truth so that he would dissuade Hyde from leaving. If she did that though she risked angering Hyde and losing him completely.

She could still maybe bring it up in a round-about way though, surely?

"Well, Mr Forman. I may not be around for much longer so I figured we should chat while we still have the opportunity."

"Not around for much longer?" Red asked. "Where are you going? God, you're not dying are you? Where's Kitty? I'll find Kitty, she'll be better to talk to than me." Red stood up and nervously looked around the room before turning to walk to the kitchen. Jackie quickly grabbed his arm and gestured for him to sit back down.

"No, I'm not dying silly!" She smiled. "I'm far too young and beautiful to leave this earth just yet. No, I'm moving away."

Red shook his head, relieved that he didn't have to deal with anything too heavy. "Moving away huh? Haven't you tried that before and come straight back?"

Jackie rolled her eyes. "Yes, but that time I went on my own. This time I'm going with a friend. A friend who actually asked me to go with them."

"This friend a boy?"

"Yes, the friend is a boy," Jackie said, watching Red's brow furrow. "He's been having a rough time of it lately, wants to leave, asked me to go. What do you think?"

Red wrapped his fingers over his knees and stared at the floor. The room was silent so Jackie concentrated on the deep breaths the old man took and the way his blue shirt went up and down on his chest. He knew who her friend was.

"Well," Red finally said, "it's a big decision you're making here, Jackie. But I guess if you really love this friend of yours, and if he feels he has no other option then I guess you just have to go."

"You don't think he's running away when he should be staying put to sort things properly?" Jackie's eyes met Red's, her mouth dry as she waited for his response.

"Now I don't condone people who go AWOL but sometimes people feel they have no other choice but to run away, they've run out of options. In this case I'd say it was a good thing that your friend isn't running by himself, he wants to take you too."

Jackie's heartbeat sped up, maybe out of nervousness, maybe out of excitement. It was as though Red was giving her his blessing to leave with Steven. Why, she couldn't understand. Perhaps he knew something she didn't?

"But what if we leave and I find out in a few weeks that he doesn't even want me? Then I've left everything and everyone behind and am stuck on my own in a strange city. I've built up a pretty good life for myself here, Mr Forman, he's asking a lot of me to leave it all behind."

"Jackie, I give credit where credit's due, so yes, you have done very well for yourself and it hasn't gone unnoticed...not by me, nor anyone else. Which is why I don't think your friend would ask you to give it all up if he wasn't serious about you. I'd say it's a case of him finally coming to his senses and trying to put things right." Red sat back in his chair and Jackie was positive she saw a slight grin flash across his face. Through all her ups and downs with Hyde, Jackie had always felt like they fought their battles alone. She'd never realised that they possibly always had an allie in Red Forman.

"I hope you're right, Mr Forman," Jackie said as she sat back into the couch with a smile.

"So do I -"

Just then the kitchen door flew open. "Now, Red, do you want..." a frazzled Kitty started before noticing Jackie and turning her attention to her. "Oh, Jackie dear! Lovely to see you."

"Hi, Mrs Forman," Jackie smiled.

Kitty's eyes darted between Red and Jackie as she tied a blue apron around her waist. "What were you two talking about in here so quietly? I didn't even realise you were both in here."

Red shot Jackie a concerned look but his face warmed as he looked up at his wife. "Oh nothing, dear," he said with a grin. "Jackie was just asking for some help with that crappy car of hers. I told her I'd take a look at it tomorrow."

Jackie caught the gist and nodded. "Yes, it's such a pile of junk."

"Oh no, well you shouldn't leave it until tomorrow, Red, Jackie has to drive it all the way back to Kenosha tonight. Go and have a look at it now," Kitty ordered, swatting Red's shoulder. Red rolled his eyes and threw his newspaper on the coffee table.

"Fine," he huffed, standing up. "Now, Jackie," he said turning to her as Kitty walked into the kitchen. "I'll go take a look at the car now but I would appreciate you keeping me posted about how it's running in the future okay?"

Jackie smiled. "Sure thing, Mr Forman," she said. "Oh, and thank you. I really love that car you know."

"I know you do," Red said as he left the room.

...

 _Three Hours Later.._

Hyde shot up and ran to the door when he heard the key in the lock.

"Damn it, Jackie!" he growled as she walked in. "Where the hell have you been?"

Jackie froze for a moment, her keys still in the lock. "Um, hello, Steven," she said, a hint of annoyance in her tone.

Hyde kissed her forehead reassuringly. He hadn't meant to piss her off the moment she walked in the door, he was just anxious to see her and had been waiting in her apartment for four hours.

"Sorry, babe. I just didn't know where you were, I was gettin' worried."

Jackie closed the door and threw her handbag on a chair. "Well I didn't know that you were coming over tonight. If I had I would've been here earlier."

"I told you I'd try didn't I?" Hyde flopped onto the couch, pulling Jackie down with him. He hadn't seen her since Monday and he'd missed her like crazy.

"Yes but you also told me you'd try to come yesterday and you didn't. I can't sit waiting around for you every night." One of Jackie's arms snaked around Hyde's neck while her other hand removed his shades. He'd gotten used to that with her, his eyes being uncovered, and he actually didn't mind it. Years of trying to protect himself from her had only led to misery, he figured letting her in might lead him in the other direction.

"But I want you to sit here waiting for me every night, so that's what you should be doing," he said, a few fingers gently playing with the silver locket around her neck.

Jackie raised her eyebrows. "Are you kidding m-"

"Yes, Jackie, I'm kiddin'!" he quickly cut in. "I'm sorry I couldn't get here last night, and I don't expect you to wait round for me. Hey, in a couple days we won't have to fuck round like this. We'll be outa here...just me n you."

Hyde couldn't freakin' wait, and was pretty sure he'd never been this excited about anything in his whole life. As a kid he'd heard kids counting down to their birthdays or Christmas, but those days had meant jack in the Hyde household. They were just another excuse for Edna and Bud to blow the rent money on expensive booze. They definitely weren't occasions to buy your kid a present, or talk to him for that matter so they definitely weren't worth counting down for. But leaving town with Jackie...now that was exciting.

Although he still hadn't been able to shake the fear that she would change her mind.

"Yip," Jackie said as she twirled the curls at the nape of his neck around her finger. "Three more sleeps."

He tried to meet her gaze, but her eyes were fixed on his shoulder. She wasn't helping him get rid of his fear.

"You counting down, babe?" he asked hopefully, tilting her chin up. Why couldn't she be more enthusiastic? Hyde didn't want to resort to kidnapping but if she kept acting like this he just might be driven to it.

She looked at him, finally, and he saw a spark in her green eyes. "I am actually," she grinned. "In three days it'll be me n my puddin' pop forever."

Hyde died. Right then. And went to heaven.

Puddin' pop. It'd been years since Jackie had called him that and hearing her say those words sent warm shivers through his body.

He tried to shake the excitement he felt by clearing his throat as casually as he could. "That's right," he said. "Just us. But I gotta ask, why haven't you started packing, man?" Jackie's apartment was exactly as it always was, perfect; everything in it's place. There were no boxes in sight. No clothes strewn across chairs for Jackie to sort into categorized piles. She wasn't a last minute girl. There had to be a reason she hadn't started packing.

Jackie's warm hands cupped Hyde's cheeks firmly and she pulled him into a tender kiss. It was as though she sensed his insecurities and was trying to reassure him without words.

But this time Hyde needed words.

He pulled his lips away and the pout that quickly appeared on Jackie's pretty face almost made him kiss her again. He fought the urge and spoke instead. "Jackie, why haven't you started packing? We leave on Saturday."

"I bet you haven't packed."

Hyde wasn't the most organized of people. In fact, most of his clothes remained in a duffel bag the whole time he lived with the Forman's despite Kitty buying him a second hand set of drawers. That was who he was; lazy and disorganized. But, if he could've been organized for this trip he freakin' would've been. He couldn't wait until Saturday when Cassidy went to lunch with her mom and he could pack his shit and get the hell outta that hell.

"If I could be packed I would be, but I'm pretty sure bags of my stuff by the door might lead to her thinkin' I'm doing a runner," he said, flicking his finger on the tip of Jackie's nose. "You, on the other hand, could have all this crap packed anytime you want. So why isn't it?"

Jackie sighed. "Well, honestly -" Hyde flinched, unsure he wanted to hear what she had to say. "- I wasn't completely sure we were doing the right thing -"

Hyde closed his eyes in frustration. "Damn, Jackie, we've been over n over this! It's the same conversation every fucking day! I calle-"

"Steven, wait, you didn't let me finish." Jackie covered his mouth with her hand. For a small girl she was surprisingly strong, especially if she wanted someone to shut up. "What I was saying was that I wasn't sure about it so I hadn't packed but now I am sure. Steven, I want us to leave now. I want us to have our happily ever after. I'm not losing you again."

She moved her hand and stroked his cheek, a warm smile on her face that extended to her eyes. It was the thumbs up sign that Hyde needed. They were gonna be okay.

"What changed your mind then?" he asked, his hand lightly rubbing her forearm.

"I talked to Mr Forman -"

Hyde's heart thumped in his chest and he felt his face flush red. Why would she do that? Why would she go to Red when he had specifically told her to keep her trap shut? "What?! Why did you talk to him? You know what he'll do now right? He'll tell Mrs For-"

"No, no, baby he won't! I promise! You have to understand, I couldn't tell no one...I needed someone to talk to. I needed someone to tell me we were doing the right thing. And, Steven, Mr Forman pretty much told me we were."

Hyde hands were furiously rubbing his head now and he just wanted to push Jackie off his lap. A million scenarios were playing through his mind but the main one involved Cassidy storming Jackie's apartment and hurting her. They were so close. So close to being away from here. But she'd ruined it.

"I gotta go..." Hyde mumbled, reaching for his aviators.

Jackie wrapped her arms tightly around his neck. "Steven, stop it! Why are you running from me now? What's got into you? I only told Red, he won't say anything!"

"Yes he will, Jackie. Adults talk remember? He'll tell Mrs Forman, she'll tell Eric n Donna, Donna will tell Cassidy, and Cassidy will..."

Jackie stared straight into his eyes. "And Cassidy will what, Steven? Be mad? Hurt? Devastated? I get that, I understand that, and it guts me, baby. But it won't come to that okay?" She lightly pecked his lips forcing him to relax a little. "Red isn't saying a word, I promise. No one will know a thing."

"I hope you're right." Hyde studied Jackie's face and vowed not to let anything happen to her. He couldn't lose both people he loved more than life. His son had suffered because of his stupidity. Jackie wasn't going to.

"I'm always right remember?" Jackie grinned a mischievous smile and Hyde almost immediately went from concerned to aroused. How did she do that to him? Generally speaking once Hyde was pissed off he stayed pissed off. But with Jackie there seemed to be a fine line between pissed off and horny as hell.

It also didn't help that she was currently straddling him wearing tight black jeans and a top that fell off one shoulder and indicated that she was braless. His eyes fell to her chest, imagining the perky, soft breasts underneath the light fabric.

Jackie noticed.

"What'cha staring at?" she purred, further adding to his arousal.

"Your tits," he said in a daze.

She flicked his chin and he was no longer staring at her chest. Instead he was staring at her scowling face. "Steven! I've told you I hate that word!"

"Sorry," Hyde mumbled, "I meant your breasts, I was staring at your breasts."

Jackie's face softened, liking his words. "Oh, you mean these?" she asked, whipping off her top.

Hyde licked his lips, his eyes fixated on the pink nipples which were now pointing straight at him. "Yeah, those." One hand moved around her small waist and smoothed up her torso before gently palming a breast. He tweaked the nipple a few times and then licked the tip a few times. Jackie arched her back, her hands pulling his head closer to her perfect mounds. "You like that?" Hyde asked.

"Mmm." She didn't need to say anything. The way she was tugging at his hair and practically shoving her tits in his mouth told Hyde Jackie wanted it as much as he did.

Rather forcefully, Hyde pushed Jackie so that she was lying down on the couch. She squealed in delight as he used his leg to open hers and settled himself on top of her. He took one nipple into his mouth, sucking, nipping, licking, while his hand worked on the other one. He couldn't get enough of her. Even her skin tasted sweet.

His work was interrupted when Jackie pulled his head up to hers. "Kiss me, Steven," she pleaded, her legs wrapped tightly around his waist.

Balancing on his forearms Hyde lowered his head to Jackie's. "With pleasure," he said into her mouth just as her hot tongue ran across his lower lip. He closed his eyes at the feel of her wet mouth. Her kiss was urgent and passionate and be damned if he didn't wanna rip her pants off right then.

As Jackie's tongue darted around Hyde's mouth her hands crept up his top. "Take it off," she ordered, barely breaking their kiss. Hyde sat up on his knees and pulled his tee off, throwing it on the floor. He stayed for a moment, just staring down at Jackie; her legs open for him, her nipples hard from his tongue, her lips swollen from his kiss. How did he get so lucky and have her wanting him again?

He ran his hands up her flat stomach. "Fuck you're sexy, Jackie," he said, admiring the body laying before him.

She giggled and winked. "I know."

"Oh I know you know-" Hyde grinned back at her "-I just hope you know you're all mine. No one else is touching this ever again." His hands trailed her torso, causing her to flinch whenever his fingertips brushed the sensitive spots on her sides.

Jackie licked her lips seductively. Hyde almost came in his pants.

"Well," she said, her hands slowly undoing his belt, "that means that no one is touching any of _this_ again either." Hyde's eyes rolled into the back of his head as Jackie pulled his throbbing dick out of his jeans and gently starting stroking it.

"Oh, man," he mumbled, pleasure coursing through every vein as her strokes found an even rhythm. "That is _all_ yours, babe." He opened his eyes in time to see Jackie's head moving closer to the head of his shaft. Fuck, if she sucked him off now he'd come for sure, and as much as he wanted to feel her mouth all over him, he also wanted to last the distance. He quickly pushed her back down onto the couch and settled on top of her, capturing her mouth with his.

As they kissed Jackie's hands roamed his body. She knew every spot; where he liked it, where it tickled him, where it drove him crazy, and she used that knowledge to her advantage. When she wanted him to increase the pace she would run her fingers along the inside of his thighs, which is where they were right now.

Taking her orders, Hyde rolled off Jackie so that he was in between her and the back of the couch. With one hand he unbuttoned her jeans and slipped his hand inside. His fingers crept lower and lower until they found her swollen clit and he began rubbing her. Jackie moved her hips, eliciting little gasps into Hyde's mouth as her pleasure increased.

"Don't stop," she moaned, as she wiggled herself out of her jeans, while simultaneously kissing Hyde, while he brought her to the brink of orgasm.

His girl was such a multitasker.

"Not plannin' on it," Hyde mumbled, moving his kisses to Jackie's collarbone. As two fingers pumped into her he could feel her muscles begin to spasm. Quickly he pulled them out and positioned himself on top her. Staring into her eyes, as she writhed in pleasure, he noticed for the first time how the green of her eyes contrasted so dramatically against the black of her pupils. He smiled, almost pleased that there was still more to know about the girl he loved so much.

Jackie's eyes closed as he entered her, and his soon follow suit. She was still so tight, even when wet and post-orgasm, and almost immediately her inner muscles tightened around him as he thrust in and out. His arms tingled as her hands trailed the outline of his biceps, almost giving out each time he dipped down to kiss her wanting lips.

"God, Jackie," he groaned as his thrusts gained momentum and grew harder. Without needing to be guided, Jackie lifted a leg over his shoulder and Hyde ran his hand up and down the smooth skin before using it for balance. He would never get over how hot this chick was in bed.

Or on a couch.

She was freaking perfect.

And his.

With Jackie's lips all over his neck, and her hands all over his body, and her inner muscles milking his dick, it only took a few more moments before Hyde exploded inside of her. Spent, he released her leg as his head fell into a pillow of her silky, black hair.

"Fuck you're amazing," he panted into her ear.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. "I know," she giggled.

He pulled her naked body closer into his and breathed in her scent. He could only describe it as something akin to vanilla; he was a guy after all and while he knew most things about her he really didn't know shit about chick scents.

"I know you know," he whispered. "But what I really wanna know is when you're gonna pack."

"Tomorrow," Jackie said, slipping a leg between his, and tucking her head into the crook of his neck. "I promise I'll be packed tomorrow."

Hyde smiled. "Only three more sleeps."

"Only three more sleeps, baby," whispered Jackie before falling asleep in his arms.


	14. Chapter 14

_A/N: Thank you all so much for the reviews! I'm glad you liked the last chapter...I hope you like this one too. It's all on from here and I'd love to know what you all think might happen! Next chapter up soon x_

* * *

 _Friday, August 7th, 1981_

 _Forman Residence_

 _4pm_

Jackie couldn't hide her excitement as she skipped up the Forman's driveway. She had just worked her last shift at the radio station and her friends there had put on an amazing farewell party in her honour, complete with farewell gift. Although she'd only been at the station a few months her co-workers obviously knew her well and had all chipped in to buy her a gorgeous pair of diamond earrings which she'd put on immediately. Granted, they weren't the biggest diamonds she'd ever seen - she'd come from one of the richest families in Point Place after all - but they were bigger than anything she could afford right now so she was happy.

Adding to the diamond-clad girl's excitement was also the knowledge that in less than 24 hours her and the boy she'd loved for over four years would be together again, properly. No more sneaking around. No more lies. No more hurt. Well there would be hurt, but for once it wouldn't be Jackie lying in a heap on the floor. It wouldn't be her crying herself to sleep wondering how it'd all gone so wrong. It'd be another girl. A blonde girl. A girl who'd already been through so much.

As Jackie approached the Forman's sliding door she tried to push down the pangs of guilt that arose every time she thought about Cassidy. Once upon a time Jackie would've revelled in ruining the slut's life, but things had changed. Situations had changed. Lives had changed. People were already hurting enough.

She shook her head and forced a smile. Tomorrow was the beginning of the rest of her life. Nothing was going to get her down.

Not even Cassidy.

She walked inside and to her surprise Hyde was sitting at the kitchen table. He was staring at a cup of coffee and wearing her all time favourite band tee, the black AC/DC one. It wasn't Jackie's favourite because she liked the band, far from it. No, she loved that tee because it hugged his body in all the right places; around his firm biceps, across his broad chest, down his slender waist.

God he was hot.

After oogling him for a moment she decided to make her presence known. "Hey," she said, stepping further into the kitchen.

Hyde looked up from his cup. "Oh, hey." His voice was low and unenthusiastic, making Jackie nervous.

"Is everything okay?" she asked, leaning on the chair next to his.

For once Hyde's sunglasses did little to conceal the sadness he was so obviously feeling and it didn't take a rocket scientist to work out that the photo album in his hand was probably the source of his pain.

"Yeah, everything's cool," he mumbled, closing the baby blue book and pushing it toward the centre of the table.

"What's that?" Jackie nodded in the albums direction.

"Oh," Hyde said, lifting his coffee cup, "Mrs Forman had some film developed today, photos of Johnny. She wanted me to come over n see them."

Jackie wanted to hug him so badly. She wanted to make him better. But all she did was put a hand on his shoulder and squeeze it gently. Tomorrow she could hold him.

"There must be some good ones in there huh? Ones you haven't seen before?"

Hyde turned his head and kissed her hand. "Yeah, there's some cool ones. Mrs F. got doubles n made this album up for us - I mean me."

"Well that's great, we can take it with us tom-"

Jackie's sentence was cut off when Kitty breezed into the kitchen, a tissue box in her small hand. Jackie quickly stepped away from Hyde.

"Sorry, Steven," Mrs Forman said as she sat down at the table across from him, "I know you don't want us all blubbering around you but it's just so damn hard not to. Whenever I see his sweet, little face I just..." The tears were streaming down Kitty's face, clearly not for the first time that afternoon. Jackie nervously chewed her bottom lip, wondering how many more tears the woman would cry tomorrow when she found out she'd not only lost Johnny but also Steven.

"It's alright, Mrs Forman," Hyde said, placing a hand over Kitty's. "You can cry all you want."

Like a little mouse not wanting to be seen, Jackie quietly moved through the kitchen. This moment didn't include her. This moment was between two people who knew and loved Johnny.

Suddenly Kitty turned around, prompting Jackie to stop in her tracks. "Oh, sorry, Jackie, I didn't even notice you there," she said, dabbing her eyes with a tissue.

"It's fine, Mrs Forman, I was just heading down to the basement to wait for the others. I won't interrupt."

Kitty smiled an empty smile, something Jackie wasn't used to seeing on such a bright, energetic lady. "They shouldn't be long, dear. Once 5 o'clock hits this house turns into Grand Central Station." Her words were followed by the nervous laugh she was so famous for prompting Jackie to smile a small smile.

"Yes, it sure does. Well I'll just be down there then," she said as she reached the door leading to the basement. "I'll leave you both to it." Not daring to look at Hyde, Jackie quickly turned and raced down the stairs. The excitement she felt earlier was again being replaced by guilt; guilt that was churning away in her stomach like a bad seafood chowder. How did she ever think she could get away with what she was doing so easily? People were going to be hurt. People she deeply cared for.

But it was hurting Hyde to be in Point Place and she cared more for him than anyone in the world.

Flopping down on the tattered, old couch she sighed and picked up an old Teen Beat magazine. Surely reading about what the stars ate for breakfast for the gazillionth time would rid the rollercoaster of emotions that were pumping through her body? She was sick of them. She was sick of never being allowed to be happy. It was as if her happiness always came at the expense of another's. Why did the universe not want Jackie Burkhart to be happy?

"Nice earrings."

She heard his voice before his heavy footsteps and swung her head around. "Aren't they gorgeous?" she asked, her fingers twirling the dainty diamonds.

Hyde sat down next to her and put his arm casually around the back of the couch. "Yeah, they're nice. They suit you."

"Everyone at work chipped in for them. They're my leaving present. I must admit, I was a little surprised they had such good taste...I mean, what some of those girls wore to work really had me questioning what magazines they subscribed to."

Hyde laughed. "Jackie, not everyone reads magazines to learn how to dress. Some people just wear what they like."

Jackie raised an eyebrow and looked Hyde up and down. "Well, I know that," she said. "It wouldn't hurt you to pick up a men's Vogue every now n again."

"Not gonna happen, babe. This is the offici-"

"Uniform of rock n roll," Jackie finished for him. "Yeah, you've told us all a million times before. I get it, although I really don't agree with it." Truth be told, Jackie wouldn't have him any other way. Sure she liked it on the odd occasion he donned a suit, but Hyde without band tees and jeans, well that would be like Donny minus Marie - it just didn't work. It just wasn't right.

Hyde rolled his eyes and pulled her head towards his. "Can it would ya? I know you love it, especially this one," he said referring to the AC/DC tee Jackie had just been checking out.

"Whatever." She was being Zen but the pink blush invading her cheeks had to be countering it, making it null and void. Oh well, with his eyes closed and tongue down her throat he hopefully hadn't noticed.

He used his hands to guide her down so that she was laying on the couch and hovered above her, placing wet kisses across her neck.

"Tomorrow, Steven. We leave _tomorrow,_ " Jackie mused, staring up at the wooden ceiling. "I can't believe it."

"Well believe it," he mumbled between kisses, "because it's happening and you better be ready by one, k?"

"Oh I'll be ready," she said, closing her eyes as Hyde's mouth moved further south. "So are we still dropping my car at W.B's? Are you sure he doesn't mind storing it for me? And what about my big things? You sure he has room for all of that? Cause I can find somewhere else, you know, a storage place or something. I really don't want to put him out-"

Hyde's head popped up, his forehead lined in annoyance. "Jackie, I've told you a thousand times, it's all good, W.B doesn't care. So can you just shut your mouth n open these legs?"

Now lines appeared on Jackie's forehead. "Excuse me? I can't believe you jus-"

"Kidding, Jackie! Kidding! Calm down, man," Hyde pleaded as Jackie smacked his back hard with both hands. Hyde sat up, grabbing the offending weapons and held them tightly above her head. He placed a soft kiss on her lips and smiled the sweetest smile. A smile that almost made her melt into the couch. "Sssh, babe," he whispered. "This is the last time I get to see you till tomorrow so lets not have it end in bruises okay?"

"Yeah I guess." Jackie relaxed her facial muscles and Hyde relaxed his grip on her hands. "You know, I think it's pretty sweet that you came over to spend some time with Mrs Forman, I know you find it hard seeing everyone."

Hyde's eyes dropped and he cleared his throat. "I came because she had photos." Of course he'd never admit to wanting to devote some time to his foster mother before he skipped town. But Jackie knew that was exactly why he was here today when no one else was around.

She ran her hand through his curls and tried to catch his eye, but his gaze was fixed on the arm of the couch. "I think you also maybe came because you're gonna miss her when we leave," she whispered.

"Pfft, whatever."

"Steven, we're making the right decision aren't we? I mean, I was thinking today, so many people will be hurt when we go."

He looked up, his eyes icy blue. "Jackie, seriously? Not this again. You're not backin' out on me now."

Jackie shook her head. "No, baby. I just can't help how I'm feeling. I feel so guilty all the time for wanting to be with you. I feel like I'm stealing you away from everyone and leaving a huge mess in my wake."

Hyde smoothed some hair behind her ear and sighed. "You're not stealing me away, I'm stealing you away. And sure it sucks that people will be bummed but y'know what? I don't really care. We gotta do what's right for us now, Jackie."

Hyde stealing her away. God it was like her teenage fantasies were all coming true. Although it used to be strict parents she wanted to escape, not bitch face girlfriends and memories of sweet little babies. He was leaving everything behind so that they could be together. It had to mean he loved her, even if he still couldn't say the words she so longed to hear.

"You won't hurt me again will you, Steven?" Jackie clasped his t-shirt, expecting him to dart up and storm off, angry with her constant need for reassurance. She hoped he would understand that he had made her the needy woman she had become. The willingness to forgive his past indiscretions didn't mean she had forgotten them.

To her surprise he didn't move an inch. "I will not hurt you again," he whispered as his warm hand curved around her neck. "I promise." His voice was full of sincerity; a virtue Jackie had only seen once or maybe twice in teenage Hyde and it filled her with hope.

"Good," she mumbled into his ear, "because I love you, Steven, and I wouldn't cope if I lost you again."

"Well you won't be losing me again so stop your worrying." Hyde propped himself up and smiled. "You're stuck with me."

"And you're stuck with me, which is good for you because you lov-"

Hyde quickly kissed her. "Don't push it," he growled after coming up for air.

"Well if you won't say it you better start showing it," Jackie warned, slightly pissed that Hyde would still only reveal his emotions to a certain extent. "And you can start with finding me a necklace to match these beautiful earrings. You know, my love for shiny things returned today."

"Not gonna happen, Jackie." A deep kiss silenced her and she soon forgot all about earrings, and necklaces, and for some reason, burgers; lost in a fantasy of waking up next to her Steven every day, and a reality of how wonderful it was to be kissed and touched by him. He was amazing.

And tomorrow, he was hers.

Girly footsteps on the basement stairs startled the lovebirds and they looked up to see a stunned Eric staring at them.

"Ah, hey," he said, fidgeting nervously with the cuff of his shirt. A shirt, Jackie thought, which did nothing for his pale complexion. He shouldn't wear cream and orange and she made a mental note to remind him of that fact later.

Hyde jumped off Jackie and grabbed his shades off the wagon wheel, quickly putting the on. "Hey, Forman, how's it goin'?" he asked as he sat down in his usual chair.

"Um, it was going good until I came down here and saw you two re-contaminating the place with your love germs." Eric sat down next to Jackie on the couch, pretending to wipe their 'love germs' off the couch.

Jackie rolled her eyes and crossed her legs. "Oh whatever, Eric. God you're so dramatic." She tried hard to cover up the embarrassment and guilt that she was sure was oozing out of her right now. The weird thing was though, Eric didn't seem too surprised about what he'd just seen. There was no hand over mouth, no loud girly scream. Just a waffly ramble about contamination and germs. Did he know about them? How much did he know?

"Really, Jackie? _I'm_ dramatic? I seem to recall you demanding your couch be taken to the dump because Fez once sat on it in his underwear. Now that's dramatic," he said with a curt nod in Hyde's direction as if searching for back up.

"Yeah, anyway-" Hyde cut in, clearly not carrying this particular line of conversation any further, "-what are you guys up to tonight? Thought we might do something, if you know what I mean?" He waggled his eyebrows and Eric smiled.

"Oh I know what you mean, my friend, and you can count me in. Oh, but only till 7, Donna's got us tickets to some play."

Jackie could see the disappointment creep over Hyde's face and she subconsciously tilted her head to the side in sympathy. He'd wanted to spend the last night in Wisconsin with his friends and it obviously wasn't going to pan out.

"Geez, Forman, grow a pair n tell her you have other plans."

Eric shook his head. "No can do, man. Each and every time I've 'grown a pair' she cuts me off for like a month. It's easier to give her the two hours and sleep easy knowing I can get sex whenever I want."

"Oh, Eric, stop lying," Jackie sighed. "You know you don't get sex whenever you want. You get it once a week after Donna's had a few wines."

Hyde smirked and nodded his head in admiration. "Nice," he said.

"Thank you, Steven." Jackie smiled.

"Oh my god, you two make me sick."

"Anyway," Hyde started, resting his elbows on his knees. "How about afterwards. I could pick you up after the play or whatever the fuck it is you're going to."

Eric ran his hand through his hair and stared off into space. "Probably not gonna work. We'll just hang tomorrow night okay? Least then Fez n Kelso can come. I know for a fact Kelso has convinced some poor girl to go out with him tonight n Fez has dinner at his host parents. So just come get me tomorrow afternoon yeah?"

Hyde shot Jackie a look before crossing his arms across his chest. "Yeah whatever, man. Tomorrow it is."

The three friends sat in silence in the basement for the next few moments. One dreaming about the sex he'd get after going to tonight's play, the other two quietly trying to commit the basement to memory, both knowing it'd be a long time before they were back here. A few times Hyde looked over at Jackie and smiled a knowing smile. He knew how she was feeling, he was no doubt feeling the same way. But they both knew they were doing the right thing. They would build new memories somewhere else. And they would build them together.

"Well-" Jackie was the first to break the silence, "- I guess I should be going now. Lots to do at home."

Eric didn't look up. "Yeah, whatever."

Jackie scooted closer to him on the couch. "Can I get a hug please?" she asked, putting her hands around his neck. His head jerked backwards and his eyes grew wide.

"What the hell, devil? No you can't get a hug!" He twisted and turned trying to escape Jackie's embrace but her grip simply grew tighter. Finally, like a six year old boy in his mother's arms, he relented and sat still, all the while refusing to hug her back.

"You're a great friend, Eric, you know that?" Jackie said, rubbing a hand up and down his back, noticing how the bones of his spine protruded out. God, how did Donna cuddle him, it was like holding a skeleton.

"Um, yeah, thanks?"

"I'll call you sometime," Jackie promised with a smile as she let him go.

Eric's brow furrowed and his eyes darted between Hyde and Jackie. Hyde shrugged as if saying to his best friend that he didn't have a clue what was up with Jackie either. "Yeah, fine, call me, whatever," Eric said as Jackie stood to leave.

"Great. Okay then, I'll see you boys later." She reached for the door handle and inwardly smiled when Hyde stood and walked over to her.

"I'll walk you out," he mumbled following her up the concrete basement steps.

Once the door was closed and they were safely out of Eric's earshot Jackie turned to Hyde and threw her arms around his neck. "God, Steven, that was so hard!" she cried into his chest.

"Hard? It was Forman, you hate Forman."

"Yeah I know, but still...imagine what it'll be like when I see Donna in the morning? And Fez? Oh my god I'm gonna be crying all the way to Seattle. There's probably no point wearing make-up tomorrow, it'll all be wasted."

Hyde held her close, letting her sob all over his tee. "Yeah, it'll suck, but it'll be worth it right?"

Jackie nodded. "Yeah, I guess. But I was excited before and now I'm just sad and I have to go home to an empty house and be sad all alone."

Hyde stepped back and used his thumbs to wipe away some of the tears trickling down her face. He took a deep breath and his lips tightened as he held her face in his hands. "I can't do much tonight about you being on your own, you're gonna have to suck that one up yourself. But, I do have somethin' that might make you feel a lil better."

Jackie studied his face wondering what the hell he was on about. Her tears ceased as Hyde removed his aviators. "Steven, what are you on about?"

He took another deep breath. "When you're sad tonight I want you to remember that I love you okay?"

Jackie gasped, three fingers covering her lips to conceal the excitement. Butterflies were fluttering in her stomach, fireworks were going off in her head. "Pardon, Steven?" she said shyly. "I didn't catch that."

Hyde rolled his eyes. "Yes you did, liar."

"No I didn't."

Hyde sighed and descended the stairs to the basement door. "You always have to push it don't ya?" he grumbled, his hand on the door.

Jackie shrugged her shoulders and smiled.

"Fine. I love you, Jackie, and I'll see you tomorrow," he said before opening the door. "Catch ya later."

And with that, Hyde was gone and Jackie was left buzzing like a fifteen year old school girl. There hadn't been doves, or diamonds, or banners, but Hyde's declaration of love meant more to Jackie than all of her favourite things put together.

Stuff the diamond earrings, Steven had finally given her a real reason to smile.

...

Cassidy parked her car outside the Forman's house and sighed. She hated coming here. It was so boring. So nice. So Brady Bunch like. She would've preferred to stay at home with her friends getting wasted, but coming here meant she'd get to see Hyde so she'd gladly accepted Mrs Forman's dinner invite. A few hours making nice with the people he considered family would surely earn her some brownie points and maybe even a night with her boyfriend.

She locked her car and headed around the back of the house. Eric's car was in the driveway so he and Hyde were no doubt having some circle time in the basement before dinner. A bit of dope would put a smile on her face and make dinner funny, perhaps even bearable, so Cassidy hoped she was in time to join the boys.

As she reached the top of the basement stairs she heard voices, one male and one female. She crouched down at the side of the stairs, careful her shadow was out of sight, and proceeded to listen. The male was Hyde, no doubt about it, and Cassidy was sure the female was Jackie. The absence of shrillness made it difficult to tell.

 _"Yes you did, liar."_

Good, thought Cassidy as she pushed the leaves from an overhanging tree out of her face, he's pissed at the pushy brunette for something.

 _"No I didn't."_

 _"You always have to push it don't ya?"_

Cassidy smirked. Yeah Jackie _did_ always push it and that's how she'd lost Hyde in the first place. Or so Cassidy had heard. If Jackie had layed off of him maybe she would've kept him. Cassidy had used all of the Jackie info she'd accumulated over the years to learn what _not_ to do when it came to Hyde. She never pressured him, never forced marriage, never demanded gifts. She did blackmail him. But that didn't count.

Just as she stood to walk down the stairs Cassidy heard Hyde clear his throat before delivering the line that would destroy her.

 _"Fine. I love you, Jackie, and I'll see you tomorrow."_

Her hands began trembling, the garden became a fuzzy haze of colours, unrecognisable through her tears. Using all the strength she could muster, she stood up, her hand on the house helping guide her to the kitchen. She sniffed back the tears and prepared herself to enter the TV perfect world of the Forman's.

 _Fuck them all..._ she thought... _they will all pay for this._


	15. Chapter 15

_Saturday, August 8th, 1981_

 _Hyde's Place_

 _12.22pm_

Hyde waited for the slam of the door before walking out of his bedroom. He'd claimed the bed a few hours earlier after Cassidy had gotten up to smoke a cigarette. He figured he needed some decent sleep today, the road to Seattle was a long one, he couldn't afford to be tired.

The sight of the kitchen was enough to elicit a sigh and a frustrated rub of his head. He'd never known a chick to be this messy. Even Edna had cleaned up every now and again. But Cassidy was a different story. She just didn't care about keeping house. At all. When Johnny was around Hyde made sure to keep up with the chores and ensure the house was clean but since the little boy had passed away Hyde had given up caring about the house too. Now he just wanted out of it.

He poured a coffee and picked up the phone, ignoring the ants crawling over an old piece of pizza left on the kitchen counter.

After four rings Jackie answered. "Hello?"

"Hey, it's me," Hyde said between sips.

"Hey me, how are you today?" Jackie asked. Her voice was high and pitchy. She was excited. So was he, although he'd never show it.

"I'm good," he said flatly. "How was your night? You cope alright on your own?"

"Yeah I did. Fez called after his dinner so we chatted most of the night. Oh Steven, he had a terrible time with his host parents. They read him passages from the bible about the love between a man and a woman and implied to him that they think he's gay. Poor Fezzy was so upset! I mean, come on, the guy has plenty of girlfriends, he can't be gay."

Hyde smirked at Jackie's naivety and stifled a laugh. "Jackie, look at the guy! You can't honestly believe he's straight? What about the way he drools over Kelso?"

"He just looks up to him, like an idol. He's not in love with him or anything. It was me he loved, for many years I might add, so he's as straight as they come."

"Yep, okay then, whatever you say-"

Jackie interrupted him, forcing an eyeroll she couldn't see. "No, Steven, Fez is not gay. You can't go around saying that about our friend. It hurts him having people talk that way-"

"Look, Jackie-" Now it was Hyde's turn to cut her off, "-I didn't call to argue about Fez, I called to see if you're all packed and ready to go."

"Oh, yes, yes of course I'm ready, everything's by the door waiting. I just need to take my rollers out in 20 minutes and I'm done."

Of course she had rollers in her hair. Of course she went to all that trouble when she'd only be sitting next to him in a car for 30 odd hours. Hyde knew she'd do it, but that didn't mean he understood why she bothered with all that crap. She was perfect with her hair tied up in one of those ponytail thingy-me-bobbies, she needn't go to all that effort when he was the only person she'd be seeing.

"Okay, well I just gotta take a shower n I'll be over. So I'll see you soon yeah?"

"Sounds good. Oh, but, Steven-"

"Yeah?"

There was a pause. Hyde would've bet a thousand bucks that she was biting her bottom lip. "Have you told Cassidy yet?"

"Nope."

"Well are you going to?"

Hyde looked around the kitchen again. The dishes were piled up in the sink. A dirty frying pan was sitting on the stove attracting flies. A bottle of milk left out was turning a foul shade of yellow. None of it was his mess; he was barely there after all. In his mind Cassidy didn't deserve an explanation as to where he was going, she deserved a lesson in housekeeping, but he would still give her one. In written form.

"Yeah I'll leave her a note," he grumbled.

"A note? Really? Can you say everything you have to say in a note? Don't you think it's best to say it in person?"

"A note will do."

"I think you should at least make it a letter-"

"Yeah whatever, Jackie. I'll see you in an hour okay? Make sure those rollers are out. See you soon." He hung up the phone as Jackie continued to ramble about letters and notes, and opened the kitchen drawer, rummaging through it until he found a letter pad and a pen. Letter writing wasn't his thing but it had to beat talking so he smoothed out the paper and started writing.

 _Cassidy,_

 _By the time you read this I would've left town. Hope you aren't too bummed out but we both know that what we had wasn't working. I've paid the rent up until the end of the month and there's a couple hundred dollars in the jar so that should keep you going for a bit. Anything else I've left you can keep, sell, burn - whatever. Thank you for Johnny. He really was a cool kid and it was awesome having him for the short time we did. I know you're still sad about him passing away and me leaving probably isn't gonna help you any, but I'm sure you'll bounce back and carry on with your life. For the record, I strongly recommend rehab, you might find things are a bit clearer without all the drugs. But yeah, whatever, it's your life._

 _Anyway, good luck with the future._

 _Hyde._

Hyde reread the letter a few times, making sure it didn't sound too asshole-y. He didn't love her, or even care about her that much, but he still didn't want to be a dick. She had been the mother of his child after all and for those few weeks after the baby was born Hyde had even started liking her, sort of. Her fixation on Jackie, drug use, and refusal to name him as Johnny's father had driven him away though, and there was no going back now. He sealed the letter in an envelope and propped it up against the empty fruit bowl for her to find later. Hopefully when he and Jackie were miles out of town.

After a quick shower Hyde grabbed his toothbrush and the last of his clothes and threw them into the duffel bag hidden under the bed. Next he gathered up his records - Cassidy wasn't keeping those - and put them into a box. And that was his life; a box of records and a duffel bag of clothes. It was depressing but he knew it wouldn't be forever. In a couple of days he and Jackie would have their own place and would be accumulating things together. Nice things. Things that would be looked after.

Hyde shoved his box and bag in the far corner of the Camino's flatbed and almost cringed at the small amount of space his gear took up. However, knowing the amount of crap Jackie would be bringing, he decided it was a good thing he travelled so light. In half an hour his car would be filled with suitcases of all shapes and sizes and copious amounts of girly shit. Hyde just hoped the stuffed animals weren't making the trip to Seattle. They were better off in W.B's garage where they could be conveniently lost, or stolen, or victims of a fire.

He started the engine and didn't bother glancing up at the old house. There was nothing there for him anymore. Everything he wanted was waiting for him - hopefully without rollers in her hair - in Kenosha. He turned up the stereo and let Memory Motel by the Stones become the theme song of his departure.

He was free. Finally.

But just as he reached the road he realised he'd forgotten something. Something important. Jamming the car into park he ran out of the car and up the front steps to the house. The little blue bunny. Johnny's bunny. He was taking it. The soft, squishy rabbit didn't mean shit to Cassidy but to Hyde it meant everything. He'd bought it for his son the day after he was born and he'd made sure the little guy slept with it every night. Since Johnny's death the bunny had sat on the abandoned cot, in the dark room, probably waiting to be saved. Hyde figured maybe one day he and Jackie would have a child of their own and the toy could be a present from the new kid's big brother.

Yeah, he was getting that bunny.

With bunny in hand Hyde strode down the hallway, eager to get on the road. Jackie would be waiting. So was Seattle. He was so fixated on getting the hell out of there he didn't notice the blonde blocking the front door, or what she was holding in her hand.

"Going somewhere?"

Hyde stopped in his tracks and blinked. It couldn't be real. She couldn't be here _ri_ _ght now_ , not when he was so freaking close.

He glanced at the white envelope still sitting on the kitchen counter. She couldn't know anything. He could still talk his way out of it. "Just going to pick up Forman," he casually explained.

Cassidy's eyes narrowed as she kicked the front door closed behind her. "With Johnny's rabbit?" she questioned, "do you and your friends often cruise around with soft toys? Or is today a special occasion?"

"Oh," Hyde said, eyes darting down at the blue bunny in his hand. "Mrs Forman is babysitting for one of her nurse friends, I thought the kid might wanna play with this."

Cassidy scoffed. "Oh, okay." She walked slowly to the kitchen counter, closer to the letter that would tell her Hyde was leaving her. "Now, what's this?" she said, picking up the envelope. "Have you been writing me love notes, Hyde?"

Hyde's heart was thumping in his chest at an almost dizzying pace. Fuck he wanted to get out of there.

"Yeah, somethin' like that. Hey, we'll talk about this later huh? Better get this over to Mrs F."

"No, I want you to be here when I read this," Cassidy said, her voice almost robotic. "It's not everyday a girl gets to read a love letter from her boyfriend with him in the room. Take a seat with your rabbit." She gestured to the tatty couch with her hand, keeping her brown eyes locked on Hyde. It was as though they were slowly and silently drilling holes in him. God he was pleased he was wearing his shades.

He cleared his throat. "Look, man. You read it and I'll just quickly drop this off to Mrs Form-"

"I said SIT DOWN!" Cassidy screamed while tearing open the envelope.

Hyde was fucked. He just knew it.

He took a few steps toward her and reached out to snatch the letter from her hand. She couldn't read it, not with him in the room. He'd have to think on his feet. Maybe tell her the truth. This shit had to be over. But his actions were no match for Cassidy's reflexes and she swiftly shot her arm in another direction before Hyde could get it. Her chest rose as she exhaled and pulled the white piece of paper out, unfolding it carefully.

Hyde watched as her eyes scanned the letter. She wasn't reading every word, surely? No one could read that fast. But she was getting the gist that's for sure. Her breathing was becoming rapid and her hands were shaking. He looked at the door. It was only 6 or so feet away but running now just seemed stupid. He had no option but to face her and explain why he was going.

"You're leaving me?" Cassidy asked quietly, her eyes still on the letter.

Hyde inhaled and stared up at the ceiling. "Yup," he exhaled, hoping like hell the rest of the conversation was this calm.

"For her?"

"Her who?" Hyde asked.

"Jackie. Are you leaving me for Jackie, Hyde?" Cassidy's lips were tight, almost curled under as if tucked into her gums.

Hyde shook his head. "No, of course not. She's seeing Kelso remember? This has nothin' to do with her. I'm leaving because this -" he gestured between the two of them "-isn't working. And it hasn't ever freakin' worked."

Cassidy wiped her eyes and slammed the letter on the kitchen counter amongst all the other crap. "Yes it has. We had a child together, how can you say it wasn't working? I gave you everything, Hyde. I gave you a son. We had a family...a home...a life together. How can you just leave me when I love you?"

Hyde took a step back, away from a sobbing Cassidy. If she was looking for comfort she was looking at the wrong guy.

"Yeah we had a kid together, but I've told you before, I never loved you. I know that sounds harsh but it's the truth. We're over, man. Sorry." That had to be the end of it. Hyde had said all he had to say regarding the matter and as far as he was concerned they were done. Hell, he'd paid the rent, left her some cash, _and_ talked to her before he left. That was way more than his mom had ever done for him when she'd gapped it. "Good luck for the future," he added as he walked to the door to freedom.

"No, Hyde, you're not going anywhere. Especially not with _her._ " Her voice was calm and even, so Hyde turned around to tell her once and for all that Jackie had nothing to do with his decision.

"For fucks sake," he said, shaking his head. "For the last time, Jackie has noth-"

"I heard you two yesterday-"

"Who?"

"You and Jackie. I heard you tell her that you love her and that you'd see her tomorrow. I know there's something going on with you two. I know that the minute you leave here you're gonna go to her and give her everything you never gave me."

"Cassidy, you've got it all wrong. I didn't mean what I said to her, you got it all out of context. I was just tryi-"

It all happened so quickly. One minute Hyde was walking toward Cassidy trying to keep Jackie out of this mess, the next Cassidy was pointing a handgun straight at him. The bullets that hit didn't hurt at first. It was the shock of what was happening when the shots rang out that forced Hyde to stop walking. The pain came later when he sat down at the kitchen table.

"You fuckin' shot me," he said in disbelief, one hand clutching his left shoulder, the other clutching his stomach.

Cassidy stood in front of him, the small handgun held loosely in her trembling hand. "I told you not to mess with me, Hyde. If I can't have you no one will," she said between tears.

A burning sensation was spreading from the bullet wounds through Hyde's body now and he could feel the blood seeping through his t-shirt. It was steadily increasing. He needed to stop it. Holding onto the table he tried to stand but was overcome with dizziness.

"Cassidy, take me to the hospital," he ordered, falling back into the chair.

"No," she said, still standing there watching him as he began bleeding to death.

Hyde licked his dry lips and clamped his hand harder on the wound to his stomach which appeared to be the worst of the two. "At least get me something to stop the bleeding...please...or call 911 and leave."

"I told you, Hyde, if I can't have you no one will."

She really wanted him dead. She was that crazy and hated him that much that she could stand there watching him slowly die. If he'd thought his life sucked this morning it'd just gotten a whole lot worse.

For twenty minutes Hyde looked longingly at the phone. It was only a few feet away in the kitchen but he knew he wouldn't make it there. His head was so fuzzy and his body was feeling weak and numb.

"Please, Cassidy, please pass me the phone. I swear I won't tell anyone you did this," Hyde pleaded. He was finding it harder and harder to stay awake now so was using his moments of lucidity to beg for his life. But his 'girlfriend' just stood in front of him with a vacant look on her face.

"No can do, _man_. Should've loved me, Hyde. Should've treated me better. Should've fought for us instead of pining after _her_." She kicked his chair and he toppled off of it landing hard on the dirty wooden floor. The pain was now excruciating and he closed his eyes.

 _Him and Jackie, sitting in the Camino cruising to their new life in Seattle. She's smiling as the breeze coming in through the open window blows her hair all over the place. He tells her she shouldn't have bothered with the rollers this morning. She tells him she doesn't care, at least she looked good when they took their 'leaving' photos. She will curl her hair again when they get to Seattle for their 'arriving' shots. She snuggles closer to him and sets Johnny's bunny in between them. She thinks it was a beautiful idea to bring the toy and wants to give it to their future children. He lets her think that that was her idea even though it was the reason he'd brought the thing in the first place. She kisses his cheek and he can smell her vanilla scented shampoo. He is finally free. He is finally with her. He is finally happy._

A sharp kick in the abdomen roused Hyde. "Still alive?"

He groaned a little and tried to open his eyes. There was blood on the floor now. His blood. And it was forming little red rivers that ran all over the dining room floor.

 _Fuck!_

He wanted to plead for his life again, just one more time, but he couldn't even open his mouth, let alone speak. He watched as white cowboy boots walked across the wooden floor to the door. The door opened and Hyde felt a rush of warm air on his face before the boots disappeared outside and the door slammed shut.

His eyes closed again.

 _Jackie..._

* * *

 _A/N: Uh-oh...stupid crazy Cassidy!_

 _Thank you so much for reviewing...they do make my day!_


	16. Chapter 16

_5.46pm_

 _Same day..._

If Michael Kelso had learned anything in his 22 years it was that playing with flare guns and turning up at Steven Hyde's place unannounced were two things to avoid. So that's what he did, he avoided doing those things, despite the fact he was sure it killed him a little each time he saw a flare gun with its safety lock firmly in place. Not going to Hyde's place without calling first, well that didn't hurt him at all. It hurt more getting frogged in the arm and pushed down the steps by Hyde.

"For a bright guy, Forman, you're pretty dumb you know that?" Kelso said as Eric pulled the Cruiser into Hyde's driveway.

"Kelso, don't be calling me dumb when what you just said makes no sense at all."

"Eric, I'm afraid I have to agree with Kelso on this one. You know how angry Hyde gets when we come over here...this won't end well," Fez said from the backseat.

Eric stopped the car and pulled the keys out of the ignition, turning slightly to face his friends. "Look you two wusses, Hyde wanted to hang last night but we were all busy, he'll be happy to-"

"Hyde's never happy, Eric," said Kelso with a frown.

Eric rolled his eyes. "Okay, he won't be _happy_ but he'll be somewhat pleased to see us, especially when he sees what we have in here." Eric tapped the glovebox where the boys had hidden a stash Kelso had just stolen from one of his brothers. "I'm telling you, stop freaking out, and go get him."

Kelso looked at Eric in horror. "Oh _no..._ this was your wise idea! I said we should've just waited in the basement but you wanted to come get him so _y_ ou go get him!" Kelso was adamant; there was no way in hell he was gonna be the one to piss Hyde off today. Usually he enjoyed messing a bit with his oldest friend and winding him up but these days it wasn't fun like it used to be. Hyde wasn't the same anymore. He was sad, and everyone knew not to piss people off when they were sad.

Well everyone except Forman.

Eric sighed. "Fine, don't go you big sook." He turned and smiled at Fez. "You'll go won't you little buddy?"

Fez shook his head and furrowed his brow. "No, I'm not going. My arms are already sore from all the blow waving I did at work this morning. They cannot possibly withstand a punch from Hyde. They are my work tools, they need to be protected."

Eric opened the glovebox and reached passed the baggie and rubbish. Much to Fez's delight he pulled out a Baby Ruth. "Please, Fez?" Eric asked, dangling the candy in front of Fez with a stupid grin on his face.

"No problem, amigo!" In a flash Fez was out of the car and running up the steps to Hyde's front door holding his chocolate treat.

"All too easy," Eric whispered proudly while Kelso slid back in his seat and folded his arms. It was hot, way too hot to be sitting in Forman's old car. All he wanted to do was get Hyde, smoke the film, find a pool to do some bombs in, then maybe convince the boys to have some beers and hit the clubs in Kenosha. Last night's date had been a complete dud, preferring talking over making out. Kelso had friends to talk to, he didn't need another one. If he was paying for dinner he wanted some action, not conversation. Tonight he would find someone up for a little fun.

He looked up and watched Fez knock on Hyde's door for the third time. Sticking his head out the window he yelled, "Just try the door, dude. His car's here, he must be in there."

Fez shrugged and looked at Eric for further instruction. Eric nodded so Fez opened the door.

The scream. Kelso was positive that scream travelled from his friend's mouth, to the car, through his nose and mouth, and hit his stomach with a thud. And he was sure it'd stay embedded there for a very, very long time.

Eric's door flew open. "What the hell?" he cried as he bolted to the front door with Kelso trailing behind.

When they reached the door all Kelso could see were Hyde's boots and some splatters of blood on the floor and dining room wall. The sight was enough to steer him back out onto the porch. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't speak. He couldn't do anything.

"Is he breathing?" he heard Eric yell at Fez.

"Just," Fez answered.

"Kelso, call 911!" Eric screamed. But Kelso didn't move. He couldn't. He just stared out at the street at the cars going by. People were going about their daily business as if everything was fine. Their lives probably were fine. Their friend probably wasn't lying on the floor covered in blood.

"NOW!" Eric shouted.

Kelso ran a hand over his face and forced himself to move. As he rushed past his three friends he dared himself to glance at them. Fez was white. Really white. He was mumbling things like, "stay with us, Hyde," and "we're here, you're gonna be okay my friend," in Hyde's ear, while Eric was tying something around his stomach. Actually, it wasn't just something, it was Eric's shirt. Eric was now shirtless.

Kelso grabbed the phone on the kitchen counter and dialled 911. The operator asked all sorts of questions, some of them only Eric could answer while Kelso played middle man.

"She wants to know what happened, like why is he bleeding?"

Eric was still frantic, running around the house gathering anything he could find to tie around Hyde. "He's been shot, Kelso! He's bleeding 'cause he's been fucking shot!"

Shot? Who the hell would shoot Hyde? Well okay, Kelso himself did once shoot him but that was only with a BB gun and wasn't _really_ intentional. Plus it didn't do this amount of damage. He didn't even turn into a Cyclops in the end.

"He's been shot," he told the operator. "Eric," he called out again, "she wants to know how many times."

"Looks like twice," Eric yelled back as he tied a scarf around Hyde's shoulder. "Once in the shoulder and once in the stomach. And tell her to hurry the ambulance up! He's barely breathing!"

Kelso reiterated everything his skinny friend had said to the operator and she assured him the ambulance wouldn't be long which was true because one minute later the sirens could be heard coming up the street.

"Thank god," Eric muttered, pushing down hard on Hyde's shoulder.

Kelso felt helpless as the paramedics got to work on Hyde and countless cops descended on the crime scene. Eric was busy giving them all the details they needed and Fez was still talking to Hyde as though the guy was awake and chatting back. Both were covered in blood. Both were trying to help. Both were of way more use than Kelso felt he was or ever could be.

They followed the gurney to the ambulance and Kelso's eyes stayed on Hyde. He was pale, deathly pale, and had a breathing mask on. His whole body was covered in blankets and Kelso was thankful he didn't have to see the blood anymore, he could pretend his friend didn't have bullet holes in him.

"I'll go with him," Eric said as he climbed into the back of the ambulance and sat at Hyde's feet. "Kelso, call my parents and tell them to meet us at the hospital. Here's my keys-" he threw the keys to the Cruiser to Kelso "-meet us there."

Kelso didn't wait for the ambulance to leave, he pushed past a couple of cops and walked back to the phone to call the Forman's.

"This is a crime scene, you can't be in here," one of the cops yelled at him.

"Whatever," he mumbled back as though Hyde's spirit had entered him. He dialled the Forman's number and watched as police moved from one room to another. Some were fingerprinting, some were rifling through drawers, some were placing little evidence numbers around where the shooting had happened. One was talking to Fez who by now must've been all talked out and had become a blubbering mess.

When Red answered the phone Kelso said a silent prayer thanking god it was the old man and not Kitty that he had to deliver the news to. Just as he'd thought, Red took the news calmly and matter-of-factly. No big questions, no tears, he just wanted to know which hospital to go to then he was gone. Thank goodness. Kelso was just keeping it together himself, he wasn't up to consoling anyone else just yet. He hung up the receiver and reached for Eric's keys that he'd dropped on the counter when he'd walked back inside. Picking them up he noticed a piece of paper half covered in Hyde's messy writing. Intrigued he picked it up and read it. Hyde wasn't around after all, he was safe from any physical damage that could be handed out for sticking his nose into the guy's business.

And Hyde's business it was.

He was leaving Cassidy. Today. Kelso's mouth fell open as he read the leaving letter and penny's began dropping. The envelope had been ripped open, the letter was open, Cassidy was no where in sight, Hyde had been shot.

Surely not? Surely Cassidy wouldn't have shot him for leaving her? Yeah girls could be crazy but this was a whole new level of crazy. This even surpassed crazy Caroline's craziness.

He stood for a moment, still holding the letter and watched the activity going on around him. The cops needed to read this. They needed to know that Hyde's girlfriend was a potential suspect. Just as he was about to hand it to an older, female cop one of his old police trainee buddies walked down the hallway.

"Hey, Kelso," Sean said as he entered the kitchen, "sorry about your friend."

Kelso shook Sean's hand. "Thanks, man. Yeah it sucks big time. Hey, ah, I dunno, but I reckon you needa look at this." He handed Sean the letter and the short, blonde man read it.

"That's interesting," he agreed. "Any idea where we could track this Cassidy down?"

"Nah, sorry. We didn't know her all that well. No clue where she hangs out."

"Fair enough." Sean popped the letter into a clear plastic bag and put it under his arm. "Hey, Kelso, look, you know a Jackie Burkhart right?"

Kelso nodded, somewhat confused that his old buddy might be hitting him up for an introduction at this particular time. "Yeah, but, Sean, once she hears about this I don't think she'll be into any blind dates any time soon. Give it a few months, aye?"

Sean rolled his eyes and pulled out a diary from under his other arm. "No, idiot. I found this is Cassidy's drawer," he said as his gloved hand flicked through the pages. "It's some kind of hate book. This Cassidy really has it in for Jackie. I'm just about to take it to my sergeant but just wondered if you had any idea why she hated her so much."

"Well aside from the obvious, Jackie _is_ Hyde's ex-girlfriend, I dunno? Like I said, none of us have ever had much to do with Cassidy, that includes Jackie."

Sean nodded and thanked Kelso for the letter before heading outside to see his sergeant. Kelso nodded to Fez that it was time for them to leave and they both walked to the Cruiser. As they walked in silence, both shocked by the evening's events, more pennys began dropping in Kelso's head. It wasn't 'til then that he remembered the other week when he'd stayed at Jackie's with Hyde and had found out that the exes were sleeping with each other again.

Jackie and Hyde were having an affair. Hyde was leaving Cassidy. Cassidy kept a Jackie burn book. Hyde got shot.

Kelso gripped his collar suddenly. What if Jackie was next.

Just then an out of breath, red faced Donna ran up the driveway.

"Oh my god, what's happened?" she panted leaning against the Cruiser's hood.

Fez put an arm around her waist and lay his head on her shoulder. "Hyde's been shot," he told her. "We turned up here today and found him laying in a pool of blood. Eric's with him at the hospital."

Donna's eyes darted around the yard and the street. Cop cars everywhere. Cops everywhere. Nosy neighbours everywhere.

"I can't believe it," she said, small tears flowing down her cheeks. "Red just yelled that something had happened and that they were going to the hospital and then left. I've been calling everyone and none of you answered so I ran here to ask Hyde. This is unreal! Who the hell would wanna hurt Hyde?"

Kelso had a pretty good idea who would wanna hurt Hyde but he didn't want to speculate just yet. His friends would think he was crazy. This was better left in his head until he had it all figured out.

Fez shrugged. "We don't know. Maybe a pissed off dealer? Or one of his mom's exes? I guess we'll find out when he wakes up and can tell us."

"So he's gonna be alright?" Donna sniffed and rubbed her tears on her t-shirt sleeves.

"Course he'll be alright," Kelso enthused. "This is Hyde you guys, nothing can stop him! He'll be awake bitchin' n moaning tomorrow, you'll see." Kelso himself wasn't sure that what he'd said was true but seeing the small smiles on his friend's faces was worth telling a lie for. God he hoped it wasn't a lie. Hyde had to wake up.

"Where's Cassidy? Is she okay?" Donna asked, suddenly standing up. Both guys shrugged and muttered they didn't know. "She called me not long ago, she never mentioned this so she obviously doesn't know," Donna said, confusion now etched on her face.

"What did she call you for?" Kelso asked. He knew the girls were kind of friends but he was pretty sure they didn't have girly chats like Donna and Jackie used to have. There must've been a purpose to Cassidy's call today and whatever it was he was sure it had something to do with what had happened to Hyde.

"Oh not much. She said she was writing out her sympathy thank yous and had one to send to Jackie. She didn't have Jackie's address and of course neither did Hyde so I gave it to her."

"Oh that's nice of her," Fez said sadly.

Like hell, thought Kelso as he opened the door to the Cruiser. "When was this?" he yelled at Donna.

Donna shrugged. "A little while ago. Why?"

Kelso was angry now. Cassidy wasn't writing thank you notes today, she was too busy shooting her boyfriend. And she certainly wasn't writing thank you notes to Jackie, she was too busy writing nasty things about her in her fucked up book.

"A little while ago w _hen_ , Donna?" he growled.

"Like, I dunno, half an hour ago maybe? Why? Do you know where she is?" Donna was still standing in the driveway hugging Fez. Both of them looked miserable but right then Kelso's mind was on his ex-girlfriend in Kenosha. He'd deal with everyone else when he knew Jackie was safe.

"I have a fair idea," he said as he jumped in the car and started the engine. He didn't look at the others when he slammed the car into reverse and screamed down the driveway. He didn't hear them call out. He didn't see them run after him asking where the hell he was going. Kelso was a man on a mission. One friend was in hospital and it'd be over his dead body that another one ended up there too.

...

 _6pm_

 _Jackie's Apartment_

 _Kenosha_

Jackie blew her nose and threw the tissue into the overflowing trash can by the couch. He'd let her down a _gain._ He'd broken her heart a _gain._ She'd been made a fool of by Steven Hyde _again._

How could she have been so stupid? So naïve? What made her think that this time would be different? He was always one paranoid thought away from fucking up their relationship but for some crazy reason Jackie had really believed that he'd finally grown up. She actually thought that he could communicate now, talk before act, speak before run, _work_ at their relationship before bailing on it. Never in a million years did she think he just wouldn't show up.

Pulling her legs up onto the couch she scanned her apartment. Everything was packed up ready to go. Everything had been packed for two days. She scoffed knowing it was going to take her another two days to freaking unpack it all. It would also probably take two hours to beg her landlord to let her keep the place. He'd been furious when she asked to be let out of her lease contract but being her usual, charming self she had managed to convince him to relent and give a poor girl a break. But after Hyde's stunt today there was no charming left. He had finally turned her into a bitter, twisted shell of the woman she once was and she didn't feel she had it in her to sweet talk asshole landlords anymore.

Then there was the job.

 _God, the job!_

New tears pooled in Jackie's eyes when she realised she was now jobless. Jobless with diamond earrings. How stupid was she going to look when people realised she was still in town? She would be the joke of the station. The girl who said she was off to the big city with her childhood sweetheart but in reality was just a big loser on her own. No boyfriend, no home, no job.

 _Asshole!_

She hated him and was fairly sure that if she ever saw him again she'd kill him for doing this to her. _He w_ as the one who wanted to go. _He_ was the one who had begged her to go. _He_ was the one that said he needed her. _He_ was the one who had convinced her that they'd work this time.

 _He_ had told her that he loved her only last night.

But _he_ was the one who had stood her up.

 _He_ was the one who had ruined them.

She'd tried to call him once but the phone just rang and rang. He was probably busy fucking his real girlfriend and having a good laugh at Jackie's expense. She'd also tried calling W.B forgetting that he was already in Seattle. After those calls she'd given up, resigned to the fact her future did not include Steven Hyde. Never again would she let those blue eyes and cheeky grin reel her in. Never again would she let those arms wrap around her. Never again would she take any scrap of affection he threw her way and turn it into something magical.

She was done with him.

Smoothing out her pretty summer dress and wiping away the last of her tears, Jackie made a promise to herself. She would not cry anymore over Hyde. She would not let him bring her down ever again. She was bitter, yes, but so is dark chocolate and the bitterness of that always leaves eventually. In time she would feel better.

In time she could, and would, move on.

A knock at the door startled her and her immediate thought was Hyde. Had he finally come for her? She ran to her make-up bag and pulled out her compact to check her eyes. Sure she was furious with him but she still wanted to look half decent when he did show his face.

The knocking grew louder so Jackie threw her compact onto the couch. "Coming!" she called as she swiftly walked to the door to see who was on the other side.

* * *

 _A/N: Thank you so much for reviewing! New chapter will be up soon_


	17. Chapter 17

Jackie's face fell when she saw who had been knocking at her door like a maniac. "God, Michael, what the hell do you want?"

Kelso pushed her inside and slammed the door. "I'm here to get you. Now grab your shit n let's go," he said, his chest heaving from running up her stairs.

"Get me? To go where exactly?" Jackie sat on the couch and crossed her legs while Kelso stared at her pile of suitcases. "I'm not in the mood to go anywhere. Especially with you."

Much to her dismay Kelso yanked her arm and pulled her up, ignoring her screams. "Jackie, we don't have time to muck around. I see you're already packed so grab a bag and let's get outta here."

"Michael, I said I'm not go-"

"Damn it, Jackie, we have to go!" Kelso yelled, picking up a pink floral suitcase and carrying it to the door.

Jackie huffed and collected her make-up bag up off the couch, shoving it into her handbag. "Fine!" she yelled back. She had spent the day waiting for her ex-boyfriend to come and get her and he finally had, only he wasn't the right ex-boyfriend. "Ew," she moaned as she followed Kelso down the stairs and to the parking lot, "you're all sweaty, Michael, ever heard of a shower or deodorant or a Laundromat?"

Kelso ignored her and quickened his pace to the car, which to her surprise was Eric's Vista Cruiser. "Get in," he ordered, throwing her suitcase into the backseat.

"Charming much?" Jackie asked, slowly becoming more irritated at being kidnapped by Kelso. "You know manners wouldn't go amiss. Actually, simple conversation or, god forbid, an _explanation_ about what the hell is going on would be appreciated as well."

"I'll explain when we're outta here," Kelso said, his eyes darting all over the empty parking lot.

Jackie stopped by the car door and looked around wondering what on earth was making Kelso so sketchy. "Are you looking for someone?" she asked, "Or are you on something? Coz if you're on some weird trip I'm telling you right now I'm not going anywhere with you...I value my life way too much, mister." She wanted to add, 'even though my life sucks shit right now' but kept that bit to herself. She'd eventually pour her heart out to Kelso, but not while he was acting like a space cadet.

"Just _get in the car,_ Jackie!" he ordered.

Jackie narrowed her eyes. "I will when you will."

Kelso narrowed his. "Well I'm waiting for _you_ so get in the damn car."

"After _you._ "

"Ladies first," Kelso said through gritted teeth.

"First time you've ever called me a lady, you must be trippin'", Jackie said with a roll of her eyes. "But as I said, after you."

Kelso was growing more and more agitated which was making Jackie more and more suspicious. When he finally relented and screamed an angry "fine!" at her she couldn't help the smirk that crossed her lips. She was a woman scorned today and no man would tell her what to do, even if he had kidnapped her.

Before she had even closed the door Kelso had started the ignition and once he heard the slam his foot went hard on the gas. He was a man possessed and the speed at which he was driving prompted her to grip the door handle tightly in her hand.

"Have you been drinking, Michael?" she asked as he sped out of the parking lot and onto the street, overtaking cars on the way. "Because I haven't so y'know, I could always drive. You'd just have to let me know where we were actually going."

"I haven't been drinking," he muttered, his eyes darting up to look in the rear vision mirror every few seconds. Jackie spun around to see what had him so concerned but all she saw was Kenosha disappearing into the distance as they flew down the highway toward Point Place.

"Well maybe you should slow down a little huh? You're gonna get a ticket and when you do don't be expecting me to go halves. I don't even want to be in this stupid car." No, if Jackie had her way she'd be at home bawling into a bowl of noodles watching Gone with the Wind.

Kelso said nothing so they sat in silence for the next few minutes until Jackie grew bored of looking out the window. "Okay, so I know we're going to Point Place. What I'd like to know is A) why? and B) what's the damn hurry? and C) why do I need a suitcase?"

"We're going to the hospital," Kelso said, his tone lower than usual.

"The hospital?" Jackie asked as an uneasy feeling crept over her like a cheap blanket. "Who's in the hospital?"

Kelso glanced at her before looking back at the road and she knew it could only be one person. "Hyde," he said softly. "Hyde's in hospital."

Jackie rolled her eyes and folded her arms. "Huh, what'd he do this time? Get drunk and fall off the water tower again? Or get drunk and get in a bar fight? God he's an idiot." Typical. She'd been at home sobbing all afternoon while he'd been out getting wasted celebrating fucking her life up again. It was textbook Jackie and Hyde. God only knows why Kelso felt the need to rush and pick her up. She was the last person who wanted to be nursing his sorry ass back to health.

"I wish," Kelso mumbled, his foot pressing harder on the accelerator.

"Huh?"

"I wish that's all that had happened," he said. Jackie furrowed her brow and tightened her grip on the door handle as Kelso cleared his throat. "He got shot, Jackie. Hyde got shot."

Shot? Someone took a gun and _shot_ Steven? No way. This was not happening.

"What do you mean? How? Why? When?"

Kelso shifted a little in his seat. "We turned up there this afternoon and Fez went in, and screams, and...Hyde, on the ground-" he closed his eyes for a second "-and blood. Lots of blood..."

"Was he breathing? Talking?" Jackie's heartbeat was as erratic as Kelso's driving. It was all over the place.

Kelso shook his head. "He wasn't talking. Barely breathing. He got shot, Jackie. _Twice._ In his own fucking home man..."

Jackie's hand balled into a fist and swung at Kelso's arm as she finally let out a scream. This was too much. This couldn't be happening. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." she mumbled over and over again after Kelso yelped and rubbed his arm.

"It's fine," he said, pulling her rocking form over to him and wrapping an arm around her. "He's gonna be okay, Jackie. He'll wake up n he'll be fine." He kissed the top of her head as she sobbed into his sweaty t-shirt. She had cursed Hyde's name all afternoon and wished he were dead and all the while he had actually been dying. It was like a really, really bad movie. A movie she didn't even want to be in.

"Who would do this, Michael?" She was shaking and had to cling to Kelso's shirt to stop herself hitting him again out of frustration. "Why would anyone want to hurt Steven?"

Kelso shrugged. "I dunno," he whispered into her hair. "But I did find a letter on the kitchen counter. Hyde had written it to Cassidy...a letter telling her he was leaving town, and her. And, Jackie, no ones seen her."

Jackie sat up and stared at Kelso. His forehead was creased, his eyes were bloodshot. "Michael, you don't think...you surely don't...Cassidy?" It couldn't be. Not Cassidy. She loved Hyde way to much to want to kill him. Sure she was a skanky bitch but she wasn't psychotic. Or so Jackie though.

Kelso's silence spoke a thousand words and when he said "I think it was her," Jackie was barely listening. Her thoughts were consumed with Hyde and how him laying in a hospital bed was all her fault. She should've left things alone. She should have stayed away after Johnny died. Hadn't the poor guy been through enough in his relatively short life?

"It's all my fault," Jackie said into her hands as she closed her eyes tight and cried even harder.

"No it's not, Jackie," Kelso said, his sympathetic hand now rubbing her arm. "The chick's a nut job. No wonder Hyde was leaving her."

Memories danced through Jackie's mind like little pieces of a puzzle trying hard to fit together. Hyde had been adamant that he couldn't leave Cassidy and stay in Point Place. He had insisted that he and Jackie leave together, telling no one. He had gone so far as to employ Kelso as a decoy to ensure that Cassidy didn't learn of their affair. Had he known how unstable she was all along?

But why hadn't he told her?

Kelso cleared his throat and moved his hand back to the steering wheel as they drove past the 'Welcome to Point Place' sign. Each and every time Jackie passed that sign she felt a sense of home; a sense of security. This sleepy little town, with it's cute little houses and dinky little shops had always been somewhere safe. But today it was as though an eerie danger had cloaked the town and the sun was even in hiding. Only black clouds and empty streets greeted them as they made their way to the emergency room.

"One more thing, Jackie," Kelso said quietly as he parked the Cruiser next to Red's Toyota.

Jackie sniffed and wiped her face with her hands. "Yeah what is it?"

"I'm positive she knows about you and Hyde. Y'know, about you guys doin' it again."

"Oh." Jackie nodded nervously and fidgeted with the hem of her skirt. She looked up again at Kelso and noticed how dark his brown eyes had become as he stared down at her. They were filled with sadness and concern. And she had a strange feeling that his emotions weren't aimed solely at Hyde. "God! Michael! You don't think she's after me now do you?"

He didn't have to answer her with words. His eyes, the lines on his face, her suitcase in the back seat, said it all. Kelso was worried.

And so was Jackie.

...

 _Point Place Emergency Centre_

 _7.10pm_

"Kelso, you dillhole!"

Those were the first words Jackie heard when she and Kelso walked into the hospital waiting room. Freaking Donna.

The redhead stood up as Jackie walked past her, blocking Kelso from walking any further. "Where the hell did you go, dude? You left me and Fez standing there! We had to walk all the way here."

Kelso ran an exhausted hand through his sandy coloured hair and exhaled. "Sorry, Donna. I had to go get Jackie."

Donna glanced at Jackie then back at Kelso who was trying to side step his way around the lumberjack and sit down. "Geez, couldn't you have dropped us off first? And what about Cassidy? Did you find her?"

Shaking his head Kelso scanned the room for Eric. The skinny man was sitting in the corner wearing one of his dad's jackets. It was far too big for him and Jackie couldn't help wondering why he was wearing such an ensemble.

"Hey, Eric," Kelso said, walking towards him. "How's he doing?"

Eric stood up as Jackie rushed over to hear the news. "He's in surgery. An emergency blood transfusion or something. The bullets don't seem to have done any major damage but the amount of blood he lost is the problem." Eric was pale and looked to have aged about 10 years since Jackie had seen him yesterday. "Man, they reckon if we hadn't found him when we did..."

Fez let out a small whimper from his seat next to Donna and the taller girl put her arm around him. "He's gonna be okay, Fez," she reassured him.

"Is he?" Jackie quietly asked Eric. "Is he gonna be okay, Eric?"

"It's Hyde," Eric shrugged tiredly. "It'd take more than a couple of bullets to keep him down."

Jackie took a seat next to Donna not at all convinced that what Eric said was true. Through all Hyde's bravado over the years she had always seen a little boy on the verge of giving up. Yes he had fought his way through many of the obstacles life had thrown at him but Johnny's death had nearly destroyed him. Did he really have any fight left?

"You okay, midget?" Donna asked when Jackie's head fell on her shoulder.

"I guess," Jackie replied, trying hard not to crumble into a blubbering mess again.

Donna sighed and rested her head on Jackie's. "This is just crazy huh? I can't begin to imagine why someone would do this to Hyde-"

"mmmm."

"-and like, where the hell is Cassidy? Why hasn't anyone found her yet? She should be here."

Jackie had to physically stop herself from flinching when Donna said Cassidy's name and Kelso's sly shake of his head reiterated to her that no one in the room knew of his suspicions. They probably all figured Hyde's shooting was a random act. As if random acts like that ever happened in Point Place.

"Where are Mr and Mrs Forman?" Jackie asked, attempting to change the topic.

"Red's talking to the cops, Mrs Forman is getting coffees," Donna explained.

"Oh okay." Jackie snuggled in closer to Donna, pleased her kind-of best friend wasn't being difficult today. She needed her friends, now more than ever, and couldn't cope with any snide remarks. It wasn't the time to rehash old wounds. It wasn't the time to question people's actions. She knew Donna thought it odd that Kelso had raced to pick her up but Jackie really didn't feel like explaining her affair with Hyde to Donna right now. It'd come out eventually. Hopefully by then she had the strength to cope with Donna's wrath.

All eyes turned to the door when Red and a police officer walked in.

"Any news, dad?" Eric asked, his eyes now wide with hope.

Red shook his head. "Not yet, I'd say we're in for a long night." His attention fell on Jackie and he placed a strong hand on her shoulder. "You holding up okay, kid?"

Jackie forced a small smile and nodded, ignoring the confused look on Donna's face.

"Is Jackie Burkhart here?" the policeman at the door asked.

Jackie sat forward in her seat and raised a trembling hand. "I'm Jackie."

"Right, good, we need to have a chat with you so if you could follow me..."

Jackie's chest grew tight and her eyes shot to Kelso. Why did the cops want to talk to her? Did they know all about her sordid lovelife? Was she in trouble?

"Um, can Michael come with me?" she nervously whispered.

"Ah, yeah sure," the policeman replied stepping out of the room to wait.

Jackie stood up and picked up her purse. Everyone was watching her but for once it wasn't because they were admiring her good looks and great fashion sense.

"Why would the cops wanna talk to you?" Donna was sitting upright now, staring at Jackie who merely shrugged. To her relief Kelso flung an arm around her shoulder and led her away from any further questions from Donna.

"C'mon, Jackie, let's get this over with," he said as they left the waiting room.

...

 _11pm_

 _Point Place Emergency Centre_

Hate books? Stalking? Cocaine? History of mental illness? It'd been 3 hours since her interview with the police had finished but Jackie's head was still spinning. During the interview she had found out that Cassidy was well and truly insane and there was now no doubt in her mind that she had done this to Hyde, even if the cops were saying it was all circumstantial and they had no real evidence to charge her with. They would get her on the drug charges, apparently a small fortune of the stuff was found in the house, but until they had the gun or Hyde's statement they couldn't do much about the shooting.

There was also the small problem of not actually knowing where the looney tune was.

Kelso, Red and the police were all gravely concerned about Jackie's safety, all believing that Cassidy seriously had it in for her. But right now all Jackie was concerned about was Hyde and his recovery. She would deal with that bitch once she knew Steven was okay.

"He's been out of surgery for ages, why can't we see him yet?" Donna moaned as her head fell back on the wall. She looked exhausted. They all did.

"I told you all, I doubt anyone will be able to see him tonight. You should all go home and get some rest. Lord knows you all need it." Kitty was doing a good job of putting up a front and trying to be strong. Jackie could tell she had her nurses hat on and she was positive that when Hyde's foster mother was finally alone she'd whip it off and crumble.

"We're not leaving, mom. Not until we've seen that he's alright with our own eyes."

Kitty pulled Eric's head to her shoulder and he never tried to stop her. He closed his eyes as she soothed him with a tenderness only a mother could provide. Not that Jackie had ever felt that tenderness from her mother...she just guessed that's what it would be like.

"Son, you need to go home. You're exhausted. You saved your best friend's life today." Kitty squeezed Eric hard and smiled. "You're my little hero."

"I was there too, Miss Kitty," Fez chimed in from the other side of Eric.

Kitty reached over Eric and pinched Fez's cheek playfully." I know you were, dear. You're my hero too."

Jackie watched the exchange, her head on Kelso's chest, and smiled. Those guys were her heroes too. If they hadn't found Steven who knows what would've happened? A life without Steven in it...it wasn't a life she wanted.

"Jackie Burkhart?"

Jackie raised her head and looked at the door hoping to god it wasn't another cop delivering bad news. "Yes?"

Thankfully it was a nurse delivering good news. "Mr Hyde is awake now and has asked to see you, could you come with me?"

Jackie shot up, adrenaline pumping through her veins giving her a new lease on life.

Kelso grabbed her hand and for the first time that day Jackie saw him smile. "Tell him I say hi," he said, relief dancing in his eyes.

"Of course I will."

"Hold up, why does he wanna see her?" Donna asked everyone but Jackie. "They're barely friends. Shouldn't the Forman's go first?"

"He asked for her so I've come to get her," the nurse said as she gestured to Jackie to come along.

"Yeah, Donna," Eric piped in, "he's the patient, if he wants to see her then he can see her. I'm just pleased he's freaking alive and talking. I really don't care who he's talking to ." Eric smiled a knowing smile at Jackie and she winked back at him. He knew the deal. He had her back. For once.

...

 _Hyde's Hospital Room_

The room was quiet, albeit for the quiet beeps coming from the machines Hyde was hooked up to. Only a dim light glowed from a small fluorescent light above the bed, just enough to show what bad shape he was in. He turned his head as Jackie let the door swing closed behind her and she saw him smile.

"You stood me up," she said, slowly moving to the bed.

"Sorry," he whispered back. He moved his right arm over his body and opened his hand for her to take. She put her hand in his and squeezed. "Don't cry," he ordered, his voice barely audible.

Jackie wiped her tears away and told herself to be strong. The tubes, needles and bandages were hard to ignore though. They were tangible reminders that the love of her life nearly died.

"I'm not, I have allergies. The cheap linen in this place doesn't agree with me," she smiled. He smiled back and closed his eyes. "You tired huh?"

Opening his eyes a little Hyde said, "Yeah, been a busy day y'know."

"Yeah I guess it has." Jackie sat down on the bed next to him and he winced. Quickly she stood up, realising she must have hurt him.

"God, I'm sorry, baby! Did I hurt you?"

"My arm," he breathed out. "Come sit on the other side."

"No, I'll just sit here, I don't want to hurt you." Jackie pulled the only chair in the room closer to the bed and sat down. God she was dumb, why would she practically sit on a guy who had been shot and had just gotten out of surgery?

"Come here," Hyde said, patting the right side of the bed. Jackie shook her head. "Jackie, come here now." His voice was so strained, so quiet. It broke Jackie's heart to not only see him like this but also hear him sound so vulnerable.

"Okay then," she said, walking around the bed. "But tell me if I hurt you." She sat down and took Hyde's hand.

"You look pretty," he whispered.

"Oooh, you think I'm pretty?" Jackie teased.

"Lot's of pain meds, babe. I'm high as a kite." His eyes closed as she tickled up and down his arm, sometimes moving her hand up to smooth his stubbly face. As much as she wanted to talk and find out what the hell had happened she knew that that would have to wait until tomorrow. Hyde was too weak right now. Right now he just needed her to be near him.

And there was nowhere else she'd rather be.


	18. Chapter 18

_A/N: Thank you so much for the reviews! They are so motivating and I truly do appreciate them. By the looks of the traffic graph I lost a few readers after chapter 15 but I'm pleased I still have the rest of you! You must know me by now...there will always be drama and angst, what can I say...it's what I like to read so it'll always be what I write. Again, cheers for the reviews!_

* * *

 _Sunday, August 9th, 1981_

 _Point Place Emergency Centre_

 _7.02am_

Jackie's eyes flickered open as the morning sun suddenly burst into the room like a thunderbolt. Disorientated, she blinked through the light a few times before realising she was in Hyde's hospital room.

"Mornin'," he said with a grin, his eyes glistening blue as they bathed in sunlight.

"Good morning," Jackie smiled. She turned to the nurse who was opening the last of the curtains in the room. "Sorry for sleeping here, I know the hospital doesn't like that," she said.

The nurse winked and filled Hyde's cup of water. "Well the hospital didn't have much choice. Your boyfriend here wouldn't let anyone wake you and he can be quite threatening when he wants to be."

Jackie rolled her eyes and grinned at Hyde who shrugged his good shoulder. She could only imagine what Hyde had said to the hospital staff during the night and was rather surprised she'd slept through it all. Mind you, yesterday had been a rollercoaster for Jackie, a third of the day spent excitedly preparing to leave town, another third nursing a broken heart, and the final third praying like hell Hyde would pull through and survive. It all felt like a bad dream now. A bad dream that had travelled down her neck and remained there in a tight knot. She rubbed her neck as the nurse left the room.

"You sore?" Hyde asked patting the spot on the bed that Jackie had occupied for most of the night before claiming the chair as a bed.

"Yeah, I am a bit. Not used to sleeping in chairs I guess." She sat next to him and he automatically lifted his right hand to her neck and began rubbing. The warmth of his touch felt wonderful. Until Jackie realised he was the one lying in hospital. "Hey," she said, grabbing his hand, "you're the invalid, not me. I should be massaging you."

Hyde waggled his eyebrows and grinned. "Oh, massage away then," he said, looking down at his nether regions.

"Oh, right, ah, okay then." She wanted him to be happy and if it meant a quick hand job then she'd do it. She just hoped no one walked in and caught her in the act. But just as she went to lift the white cotton sheet Hyde stopped her.

"Jackie, I was kidding, man! I got shot twice yesterday so as much as it kills me to say this, I really don't feel like _that_ at the moment."

Jackie pouted and stroked his cheek. "Awww, my poor baby."

"Yeah, well, I'm sure it won't last long so make sure you're ready when I do feel like it. It'll probably be sometime this afternoon," Hyde said staunchly, his face flushing red. He felt embarrassed; weakness was not an emotion Steven Hyde wore well, it clashed with his belt buckles and concert tees. Not that he was wearing either right now.

"Well, I'll be ready when you are, puddin'." Jackie leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on his lips as his hand slid down to her hip, resting there. "Steven," she whispered, her face lingering only centimeters above his, "who did this to you? What do you remember?"

He sighed a little and moved his hand to his forehead, rubbing it hard with his fingers. Jackie knew it'd be difficult getting him to talk but she had to do it now before his room turned into the Forman's basement.

"I can't remember."

"Really? You can't remember anything about yesterday? At all?"

"I remember callin' you. I remember packin' the car, then forgetting somethin' and going back inside-"

"What did you forget?"

Hyde's fingers were now rubbing his eyes. He was either trying to remember or trying to feign a headache. Either way Jackie was going to push it.

"A stuffed toy... a blue rabbit. One of Johnny's," he explained. "I bought it for him. I wanted to take it with me."

"Then what happened?"

He sighed again, this time taking his sweet time to exhale. "As I was leavin' the house someone shot me. That's it."

Jackie licked her lips and stared at the monitors beeping and blinking away. He was full of crap.

"So you never saw the person?"

"Nope."

"Why would a stranger just shoot you, Steven? In your own home?"

"Probably wanted to rob the joint...I dunno."

"Steven, I've talked to the police, nothing was trashed, nothing was missing, nothing had been rifled through, and there was no sign of forced entry. You weren't being robbed, baby. You know who did this and if you don't admit you know she'll get away with it." Her words may have been a tad in his face but he needed to hear them. Cassidy couldn't get away with it and Jackie wouldn't let Hyde cover up for her.

Hyde closed his eyes and clasped the bandage on his stomach. "Jackie, I'm tired n I'm sore. Can we just drop this?"

Damn it, she was starting to cry. Again. How were there any tears left? "No, we can't drop this. Steven, the girl has devoted years to stalking me. She kept a book detailing her hate for me. She's a hardcore drug user and she fucking shot you! Why are you covering for her?"

He opened his eyes, shocked. "You know?"

Jackie nodded and placed her hand over his. "Everything. Baby, why didn't you tell me all of this? We could've worked it out together." He wouldn't look at her, his gaze trained on the white ceiling above him. "Steven, talk to me."

"I-" he started, "-I couldn't, man. I didn't want you all gett'n involved in the fucked up shit I was livin' with." His voice was low and gravelly, filled deep with sadness.

"Why not? We could've helped you."

His eyes swiftly locked on her and narrowed. "Really, Jackie? You would've helped me? After all the shit I've done to you over the years? Ha! I doubt that. And besides, I didn't want anyone's help...it was my mess and I had to fix it."

Jackie wiped her tears, suddenly feeling cold from the harshness of his words. "Well you did a fine job of fixing it on your own didn't you, Steven? Look where you ended up. And that basket case is still out there somewhe-"

"Fuck!" he screamed, slamming his balled fist onto the bedside trolley and knocking over everything perched on top of it. A plastic water jug flew off, it's contents gushing down Jackie's legs. She quickly rushed to the basin, pulling handfuls of paper towels out of the dispenser. It wasn't that having wet legs bothered her that much, her actions had more to do with suddenly needing some distance from Hyde.

"Jackie," he said, his tone now soft, "I'm sorry okay? I really don't wanna fight with you right now."

Jackie kept her back to him as she bent down, wiping the water from her legs. Thank goodness she wasn't wearing suede shoes. Once her tears had subsided she used the last paper towel she had to wipe her face and walked back to the bed. Standing next to him she said "I don't want to fight with you either but I don't get why you didn't tell anyone about this and I really don't get why you're covering for her."

"Technically I'm not covering for her, I haven't talked to the cops yet." He reached a hand out to her, a hand that she ignored.

"What will you say when you do?"

He paused for a while, staring again at the damn ceiling. "Fuck," he muttered, "she was my kid's mother, man. I can't stand her but I can't lock her up."

Jackie pursed her lips, her fists clenched at her sides. "Oh how very fucking noble of you. Shame she didn't give a toss about your well being when she goddamn _shot_ you!"

How could he even be thinking like this? She'd have to talk to his doctors, perhaps he'd been prescribed some pills that made him temporarily insane.

"Jackie, you don't get it. I keep fuckin' up, and when I do I always seem to take someone down with me. Look how I messed your life up. You would've been fine if you hadn't met me...you lost your job in Chicago, your friends...hell I drove you to date fuckin' Fez!"

"All of that is completely different. You didn't mess up Cassidy's life, she messed it up herself."

Hyde rubbed his eyes. He was getting tired now, she could tell. "But what about my kid? He didn't deserve the life he had. That's my fault for being a drunken idiot n sleepin' with the first piece of leg that hit on me-"

Jackie wanted to hurl. "I don't need details, Steven."

He glanced at her. "Sorry, babe. You just gotta see, Jackie, anyone who comes near me gets hurt. Whose to say what might've become of Cassidy if she hadn't had my kid? I drove her to do this, man-"

"I think the cocaine may've helped a little too."

"Yeah, well, that's true. I've just never been a snitch. I don't rat people out to the heat."

Jackie had had enough. He was talking crazy and it was doing her head in. Only one thing would get through to him and it was time he realised what he was saying. She picked up her handbag and flung it over her shoulder. "Okay, Steven, everything is your fault and you've ruined many lives. You owe it to Cassidy to let her have her freedom. Anyway-" she leaned over and kissed him on the forehead "- I really need a shower so I'm going to head home for a while. I'll be back in a few hours okay, baby?" As she pulled away he quickly grabbed her arm.

"Who's taking you home?" he asked, lines of concern crinkling his forehead.

"I'm taking myself silly. I can drive remember."

"No, Jackie, you can't be there on your own. Get Forman to go with you...actually scrap that, get Kelso, or better yet, Red."

Jackie wanted to smile, her plan was working after all, but she feigned ignorance and kept up her charade. "Why would I need one of them to come with me? I'm perfectly capable of getting myself home."

Hyde's grip tightened, preventing Jackie from walking away. "You can't be on your own, she's fucking crazy."

"Who's crazy?" Jackie said, her eyes wide.

"Cassidy! Cassidy's crazy n I don't want you goin' anywhere on your own. She hates you, babe, she'll try n hurt you." Everything about him screamed panic. Jackie was certain she actually saw the moment when he finally realised he had to tell the police the truth. It was when his grip relaxed and his eyes softened.

"Oh, so for the rest of my life I need a big strong man with me in case she comes after me? I don't know, Steven, that seems a bit over the top don't yo-"

He dropped her arm. "I'll tell the cops."

Jackie dropped her bag. "What was that?"

"I said-" he held out his hand and she took it, perching herself next to him on the bed "-I'll tell the cops it was her."

"You promise?" she asked, her eyebrows raised in suspicion.

"I promise I'll tell them it was her if you promise you won't be alone until they have her." He kissed her fingertips, his lips warm like his eyes.

"Deal," she smiled.

"Can we seal the deal with a proper kiss then?" Hyde pulled Jackie down next to him, guiding her mouth to his. The kiss was deep and warm, and if Jackie had her way it would never have ended but stupid doctors have rounds to do and don't give a crap about true love.

"Sorry to interrupt," the doctor said as he walked in followed by 3 junior doctors. Jackie quickly scanned the talent; none of them were hot, not like the doctors on TV. Lucky they'd be making truckloads of money, they'd need it if they wanted to bag a hot nurse.

"Could'a knocked," Hyde grumbled, planting one last kiss on Jackie before she stood up.

"Sorry about that." She smiled at the doctors as she picked up her handbag again. "I'll leave you all to it. Steven, I'll be back after a shower okay?" Hyde's face fell in disappointment. "I won't be long, baby. Anyway, everyone else is waiting to see you so I'll send them in."

"Tell them I'm asleep," he grumbled as she walked to the door.

She turned and winked at him. "Tell them yourself."

...

When Jackie entered the waiting room she was surprised to see everyone appeared to be showered and changed. Well, all except Kelso; he was still in the same manky t-shirt from yesterday and looked like crap. They all rushed out of their seats when Jackie walked in, eager to hear how Hyde was.

"How is he? Is he talking, honey?" Kitty asked as she pushed in front of Donna.

"What's he said?" Red asked.

"Can he move? Does he remember me talking to him?" Fez enquired.

Jackie smiled at their concern. If only Hyde could see how much everybody loved him. If he had known maybe he would've turned to one of them earlier. "Guys, he's okay. Well he's sore, and really, really tired. But he's talking, and moaning, and he's gonna live to see another day," she said proudly.

They all sighed in relief upon hearing her news and she was sure she saw Eric wipe a couple of happy tears from his eyes.

Kitty pushed a plastic container into Jackie's hands. "Now, sweetie, we've all been home and had some sleep, and something to eat, and showered-"

"All of you?" Jackie raised an eyebrow and looked at Kelso.

Kitty continued. "Well most of us. When the nurse told us that you were fast asleep and Steven wouldn't let them wake you we decided to go home so that we were fresh for today. Michael kindly offered to stay here in case you woke up and wanted to go home-" Jackie smiled at Kelso, he really was her hero "-so I brought you something to eat. Now sit down and get it into you. You must be famished."

Jackie took the container and thanked Kitty. The old lady really was just about the sweetest person in the world. "Mrs Forman, if you wouldn't mind, I could really do with a shower. Would you mind if I went back to yours for a bit? The doctor is with Steven at the moment but I've told him to expect you all in there soon."

Kitty beamed excitedly. "Oh of course you can go back to ours. You know where everything is." She turned to Red. "Oh I can't wait to see my Steven! I wonder if he can eat yet? Should I go get him something?" Red took her arm and led her back to their seats, explaining to her that hospitals actually serve their patients food and maybe if she wasn't so busy gossiping to the other nurses she would know that.

"I'll drive you to the Forman's, Jackie." Kelso yawned and rubbed his head. "I could use a shower too."

"No kidding," Jackie half teased, not noticing Donna standing next to her with her arms folded.

"So, ah, Jackie," she started, "has Cassidy been in?"

Jackie sighed and looked up at her friend. "No, Donna, she hasn't."

"What has Hyde said? He must be wondering where the hell she is."

"Why don't you ask him when you go see him huh? Ask him where his _girlfriend_ is. Ask him why she hasn't been in to see him. Just leave me out of it." Jackie turned her back on Donna and gestured to Kelso that it was time to go. He promptly stood up and walked over to her.

"Well, Jackie," Donna said before Jackie could leave. "The thing is, you're kinda in it aren't you? I mean you stayed with him the whole night which meant none of us could go i-"

"God, Donna!" Jackie swung around, her shoulders raised, her voice low. "Cassidy doesn't even have a freakin' Trans Am and you're still all over her! Like I just said, ask Hyde what's going on with her. I'm going home for a goddamn shower!" As quick as a flash the little brunette turned on her heels and marched out of the waiting room with Kelso. "God she's annoying!" she muttered as they reached the Vista Cruiser.

"Yip," Kelso agreed. "And I think she might be eating a whole lotta humble pie before the day's out."

...

 _Forman Residence_

 _40 minutes later..._

Wrapped in a towel Jackie opened her suitcase out onto Laurie's bed hoping like hell it wasn't her suitcase containing only lingerie and sleeping attire. She hadn't bothered to check which case Kelso had grabbed when he'd kidnapped her. A move she was now lamenting.

To her relief, however, the contents were somewhat decent. She could pull an outfit together, she just wouldn't have matching shoes to go with it.

 _Dammit!_

After dressing in a pair of black shorts and a tight purple t-shirt Jackie knocked on the bathroom door. "Michael?" she said through a small gap in the door. "Are you decent?" Steam was pouring out of the gap smothering Jackie so she pushed the door open wide.

"Damn, Jackie! I'm in the shower!" Kelso yelled from behind the plastic curtain.

"I see that and make sure you stay there!" Jackie yelled back as she sat herself on top of the bathroom vanity.

Kelso popped his head out from behind the curtain, his head covered in foamy shampoo. Waving a back scrubber in her face he said "Now don't you go peeking-" a grin crept over his face "- unless of course you want to...and if that's the case might I suggest you hop on in?"

Jackie rolled her eyes and laughed. "Michael, even with 2 bullet holes and barely any blood pumping through his veins Hyde would still kick your ass."

"Yeah I know." Kelso pouted and swiftly pulled the curtain back in place.

Before he could resume singing Jackie had to ask him a question so she moved closer to the curtain. "Hey, Michael, you know when you were at Steven's yesterday-"

"How could I forget."

"Yeah, well, um did you happen to see a bunny rabbit anywhere? Not a real one, like a toy one?"

"Umm, maybe? I dunno, Jackie. I wasn't really taking much notice of anything except _my friend dying on the floor!_ " His voice was loud and irritated so Jackie apologised and swiftly left the room.

But not before grabbing Eric's car keys off of the vanity. She was finding that rabbit.

...

As she drove to Hyde's house she was pleasantly surprised when 'Heroes' by David Bowie came on the radio. She loved this song, even though it did sometimes take her back to bad times with Hyde. She'd played it over and over again each and every time they'd broken up. To her it was a love song. A love song about two lovers who desperately wanted to be together but because of so many obstacles couldn't be. It was as if the song were written for them. However when she'd played it for Steven after the Sam debacle was over, and explained what it meant to her, he'd laughed and told her it was simply a song about two people Bowie had seen kissing by the Berlin Wall.

Whatever.

To her it was a love song and each time she kissed Hyde Bowie's voice was in her head singing _"and we kissed, as though nothing would fall"._

Nothing would fall for them again. They would become a reality.

She was sure of it.

She parked the Cruiser on the road and briskly walked up Hyde's driveway, only slowing down to gently trail her hand along the El Camino. The black car was hot to the touch as the morning sun pelted down on it. There were so many memories in that car...and Jackie was sure there were still so many new ones to make.

Once on the porch she peered through the dining room window. The scene before her was one of horror. Steven's blood was everywhere. Bile rose from her stomach and she had to physically make herself swallow it back down. She couldn't be seen puking all over his yard, that would attract attention. This mission had to be quick. In and out. No cops. She made herself look through the window again, ignoring the blood, and soon spotted a blue rabbit underneath the dining room table. It appeared to have come out of the ordeal relatively unscathed, only a few drops of blood on it's little face. After trying the window and finding it locked she ran around the back. Surely Hyde and Cassidy weren't the type to lock _every_ window.

Sure enough, it didn't take long to find a window open. Bummer for Jackie it happened to be their bedroom window. Bile threatened to surface again as she hoisted herself in and scampered through the room, blocking out thoughts and images of the two of them doing it.

 _Ew! Get the bunny and go!_

As her feet clip clopped toward the dining room she cursed Kelso out loud for grabbing the wrong case. She looked ridiculous in black high heels and little shorts. Maybe she had time to stop at the mall on the way to the hospital? She really could do with some new espadrilles...

But all of a sudden wearing stilettos wasn't such a bad idea. Raising her foot she slammed it hard into a lump on the couch.

"Wake up, bitch!" she screamed as Cassidy opened her eyes.

* * *

 _A/N 2: I know this last part was a bit disjointed...I'm just so sad about Bowie passing away and wanted to include him somewhere in this chapter. As I've got my updating mojo back I didn't want to rewrite too much of the chapter and hold up the rest of the story. Oh what a sad day..._


	19. Chapter 19

Cassidy flinched as Jackie's sharp stiletto heel jabbed into her back. She rolled over to face her morning attacker with a look of surprise. "You?" was all she uttered as she slowly sat up.

Adrenaline was pumping through Jackie's body, accompanied by the nauseous feeling she still hadn't been able to shake since first peeking through the dining room window.

"Yes, me," she yelled, a commanding hand on her hip. "Who were you expecting? The cops?"

The small blonde ran her hands over her face before staring at the ground. She looked tired. The attempted murder business must be tiring work.

"The cops...my mom...psych doctors...whoever..." She stood up and walked to the kitchen, her shoulder brushing Jackie's arm as she passed her. The goosebumps appeared immediately but Jackie was too fired up to care about her body's nervous reactions. Frustrated by Cassidy's nonchalance she followed her into the kitchen which turned out to be the wrong place to go when one was feeling as sick as she was.

"God, don't you ever clean up this place?" she asked, screwing her face up at the mess. Her poor Steven, having to live like this. How the hell _had_ he lived like this?

Most likely because the silly guy believed that living in a dump was all he deserved.

Cassidy rinsed out a dirty glass and poured herself a water. Each gulp she took further infuriated Jackie as she rapped her long nails on a small piece of counter top not cluttered with crap. Finally Cassidy finished her drink, set the glass down, and turned to look at Jackie.

"How _we_ live is not your concern." Her eyes were dark, her hair a blonde tangled mess.

"Maybe not," Jackie started, folding her arms across her chest, "but you trying to kill Steven most certainly is."

To Jackie's disgust Cassidy merely shrugged her shoulders as though Jackie had just scolded her for forgetting to pick up milk on her way home. This woman didn't care. About _anything._

"Did you hear me? I know it was you who shot Steven."

Cassidy looked her at her, expressionless. "Yeah, well, he's still alive so all's well that ends well. Now if you wouldn't mind, I needa take a shower."

Jackie had to shake herself to check that this was real. Usually when one of her friends was acting weird she would ask them what they were on, but with Cassidy it was more a case of her being on nothing. She was clearly on a downer from the biggest high ever.

Blocking the weirdo's exit from the kitchen by stepping in front of her Jackie said, "Seriously? You are seriously gonna have a shower now? Do you realise every cop in Point Place is looking for your skanky ass right now?"

"Well they clearly aren't looking that hard, coz I'm right here...and I'd like a shower," Cassidy snarled. Finally Jackie was getting somewhere. Finally Cassidy was showing some emotion.

"Poor Cassidy wants a shower, boo hoo. Poor Steven wants to be able to move his left fucking arm and get out of a hospital bed but he doesn't have that luxury right now, thanks to you!" Jackie clenched her jaw as another surge of adrenaline hit her. God she wanted to punch the bitch's face in right now but first she needed answers.

"Thanks to me?" Cassidy's eyes shot up at Jackie. "I suggest you take a look at the part you played in all of this, Jackie. If you hadn't come creeping around again none of this would ever have happened. Hyde wouldn't be in hospital, you wouldn't be here, I'd be in the shower..."

Jackie's lips curled at the audacity of the woman. How the hell could all the blame put on her? Sure, she'd take some of it, getting involved with a guy who had a girlfriend certainly wasn't something she was proud of, but how could she have foreseen this? She had expected someone to be nursing a broken heart, not bullet wounds.

"Look, Cassidy," Jackie softened her tone, apologies shouldn't be yelled, she'd learned that from her mother. "It was wrong of me and Steven to go behind your back and I sincerely apologise for doing that." With sorrys out of the way Jackie raised her shoulders, and her tone. "But, _you tried to fucking kill him!_ That's all on you! Did he deserve a slap in the face? Yes. Did he deserve some ripped up t-shirts, yes. But getting shot? No! He didn't deserve that, Cassidy."

"Yes. He. Did." Cassidy spoke slowly and with conviction. Her stare boring into Jackie, past her eyes and deep into her brain, making her shudder.

"No, he didn't," Jackie said calmly, realising just how messed up the girl standing before her was. This wasn't a chick who'd just lost it in the moment during a drug induced rampage; this was a chick who, now sober, absolutely believed that what she'd done was right.

Cassidy went to move past Jackie but the taller brunette grabbed her arm causing her mismatched socks to slide her across the wooden floor. Still holding her as she composed herself Jackie asked, "Why? Why did Steven deserve to die?"

Sunlight streamed in from the kitchen window and onto Cassidy's face; a face, Jackie noted, that was more weathered than most nineteen year olds. She'd been through the wringer, that was clear. Shame she had to go through it one more time with Jackie.

Pulling herself out of Jackie's grip Cassidy stood tall, well as tall as she could for someone so short. "He broke my heart, that's why." Her voice trembled like her hands but Jackie could see she was trying to keep it together. Jackie was the master of trying to keep it together, she knew every trick in the book. The way Cassidy pursed her lips. The way she steadied her breathing. Tell tale signs. "He left me for the person I hate more than anything in the world."

Jackie gasped. A lot of people hated her, but this was some serious hate. Enough to spawn a book and murder. "Me?"

Cassidy glared at her and nodded. "You."

"Why? What did I ever do to you? You took _my_ boyfriend remember? You had a child with _my_ boyfriend. He left me to be with you and your son. If anyone should be doing the hating revenge thing it should be me." Jackie folded her arms and stared down at Cassidy. "Oh, and by the way, I also hate you. Loads. I just have better things to do with my time than stalk you."

Closing her eyes Cassidy sighed. "See, princess, you just don't get it do you? You don't even remember what you did to me. You probably don't even recall that I even went to your high school."

"Sure I do. You had a stupid crush on Steven and then went on to become a huge slut. How could I forget?"

"Fuck, I hate you," Cassidy said through gritted teeth, tears pooling in her eyes.

"Okay." Jackie sighed. "I'm sorry for calling you a slut but I just call 'em as I see 'em and you did manage to ge-"

"Shut up, Jackie!" Cassidy was no longer trembling, now she was shaking, her face so red Jackie thought she was going to pop like one of Eric's zits. "Why was I a slut, huh? Did you ever ask yourself that? Why did I do the things I did? Did you ever stop to think about what your actions did to me, or were you too busy staring at yourself in the mirror and congratulating yourself on your perfect life?"

Jackie blinked rapidly as she tried to take in Cassidy's onslaught. For the life of her she did not understand how she had contributed to Cassidy's misery; other than being the love of Hyde's life of course. "Cassidy, you're rambling. I don't know what I did to you that was so bad. I mean seriously, it was high scho-"

"Exactly! It was high school and for me it was a _new_ high school. Do you know what it's like to start a new high school?-" Jackie shook her head and listened "-It sucked! I was short, and skinny, and had a big mouth mom who poked her nose into every aspect of my life. I had no friends in this town and no life. All I had was Hyde. He was the only one who was nice to me at school."

Hyde? Nice? That was news to Jackie. She'd heard him be called many things at high school - burnout, tough guy, cool - but never _nice._ Cassidy read Jackie's confused gaze and elaborated. "I'd sit under the bleachers at lunchtime and smoke cigarettes, he'd be there too, we hung, talked, smoked-"

Yeah, that made sense. She probably had the smokes and he was probably talking so he could score them off her.

"-and he really got me...he understood me. He told me it didn't matter whether or not people liked me. He said that the 'cool' people were really the fucked up ones. He was...he was..."

Her voice trailed off into silence and for the first time that morning Jackie felt a tad sorry for her. She knew for a fact that Hyde barely remembered Cassidy from high school but here she was describing him as though he were her everything. She'd put him on a pedestal that he didn't even know he had been standing on.

"Yeah, he's a good guy," Jackie mumbled as Cassidy wiped her eyes.

"He was more than a good guy, but you...you and your 'perfectness' ruined it all," Cassidy spat, her face still red. "It wasn't enough that you had the supposed 'hottest' guy at school- that idiot Kelso- plus every other guy after you, you had to chase down and land Hyde too. The one guy that got me. The one guy that wasn't like all the others."

Jackie rolled her eyes and shook her head. She loved Hyde but god, he was nowhere near perfect and Cassidy was downright delusional to believe he was. He was a guy after all and they all messed up somewhere along the line.

Plus, she couldn't help the fact he fell head over heels in love with her.

"Cassidy, I'm sorry that Hyde chose me over you. It sucks but that's just what happens in life. I'm sure if you'd looked you would've found somebody else just as great."

Cassidy was pacing the small kitchen, still shaking, still red faced, still out of her mind. Jackie scanned the counter for the phone deciding this conversation needing wrapping up, preferably by the police. She just needed to get to the other side of the kitchen without making it obvious.

"Oh. My. God. You still don't remember do you?" Cassidy yelled, her hands flying to her own head and grabbing her hair. "I had seen him watching you at cheer practice when you were still with Kelso. I'd seen the way he looked at you and drooled after you. So I tried to be like you...I joined the cheer team, I did my hair all Jackie-like, I tried to get in with the popular kids. But it wasn't enough...when we went back after summer he was with you. He didn't come to the bleachers anymore, he hung out with you. God, and then Suzy fucking Samuels - who was supposed to be my _friend_ \- goes and tells you that I liked him so you go on and _destroy_ my life!"

Jackie's forehead crinkled. At first she'd been overcome with the knowledge that Steven had been drooling over her when she was with Michael, but then she'd found out she'd somehow destroyed Cassidy's life. So much for one girl to comprehend in one go.

"How? How did I destroy your life?"

Cassidy stopped pacing and turned to Jackie. "First, you got me kicked off the cheer team. Then you told everyone I was after your boyfriend-"

"Well, lets be fair, you were-"

" _Then_ you told every single person in the damn school that I was having sex with my brother! That was it, that lie effectively ended any friendships I may have made, and any chance I had of enjoying my high school years. Thanks, Jackie, you fucking bitch."

Jackie's eyes were wide and she knew her mouth was hanging open. For the life of her she couldn't remember spreading that rumour but even she had to admit it did sound like something teenage Jackie would say. It was nasty. It was low. It was uncalled for.

But it was also in the past and there wasn't anything she could do now to change it.

"Cassidy," she said quietly, nervously playing with her bracelet, "I'm so sorry. You didn't deserve that at all and it was a horrible thing to say. You can't help who you fall for - god I know that more than anyone - and you absolutely shouldn't have been punished like that. I am truly, truy sorry for what I did back then." She knew her words would mean nothing to Cassidy, especially now, but at least she'd said them and meant them.

But still, what had happened between them years ago in no way justified what had happened yesterday.

"Apology not accepted."

Jackie sighed. "I didn't think it would be, but I meant it. One thing though, yeah I was a bully and a bitch to you but you sure got me back for it. Every time me and Steven broke up you were all over him like a leech until he finally gave in to you. You made damn sure we broke up that last time. You and I were even, Cassidy. Until yesterday."

Cassidy dragged her hands down her face, pulling her cheeks so hard her face distorted. "No, Jackie, we weren't even. Me n Hyde were a family and you destroyed that-"

"You weren't a family. Once Johnny passed away you were just two people existing in the same house." Cassidy's tears were like nails down a blackboard for Jackie; she hated them. They were washing away her anger and replacing it with guilt. No, it wasn't her fault their baby had died. It wasn't her fault they had broken up. Cassidy had shot him. Jackie had to remember that. "My heart broke for Steven - and you - when your baby died. And I know it must've been awful for you when you knew you were going to lose Steven as well, but you could've moved on. You still had a future. But you ruined it the minute you pulled a gun on him."

Cassidy screamed and banged both her fists down on the counter sending plates and glasses tumbling over the side and smashing on the floor. Jackie jumped and automatically went to pick up the shattered pieces before noticing the knife in Cassidy's hand and recoiling in fear.

"No, Jackie," Cassidy said as Jackie slowly stepped back from the counter toward the door. " _You_ ruined my future years ago. _You_ took everything from me, which is why I tried to take everything from you. Why should you get Hyde and I get left with nothing? That doesn't seem fair to me. Wasn't it enough for you that I lost my son? Why take my man away from me too?"

Jackie's eyes stayed fixed on Cassidy's right hand and the dirty knife she held in it. Calmly she said "Cassidy, I said I'm sorry, but I love Steven, I always have. Now why don't you put the knife down and go and take that shower, huh?"

"Think I'll pass on the shower," Cassidy smirked before lunging at Jackie at full speed. Jackie raised her right arm in front of her face - if anything was getting cut she sure as hell was making sure it wasn't her greatest asset - and felt the sting of the knife as it pierced her skin and tore down her forearm.

"Bitch!" she yelled, lifting her leg and booting Cassidy in the stomach with all the force of a 200 pound man, or Donna. Cassidy's body jerked back and she tumbled to the ground, dropping the knife as her head smacked hard on the floor. Swiftly kicking the knife across the kitchen Jackie took a breath before jumping on Cassidy, straddling the screaming girl's waist and holding her down. "You shot my man and cut my arm you skank!" the small brunette shrieked as he pounded Cassidy in the face with her bloodied hand. " _No one_ messes with Jackie Burkhart... _or_ her boyfriend!"

Jackie had done some shitty things in her life and telling people that Cassidy and her brother were doing it was definitely one of the shittiest, but kicking the girl's ass right now felt good. It felt right. It felt just. After all, she was done apologising.

And where apologising ends...

* * *

 _A/N: Thank you a gazillion for the reviews...love them!_

 _Sorry this chapter was shorter than the others and was only one scene. You have no idea how much I wanted that scene over n done with so once I'd finished it I just pressed 'save' and moved on lol. Next chapter up soon._


	20. Chapter 20

_10am_

 _Point Place Medical Centre_

Hyde closed his eyes, desperately craving sleep. His body was sore, his head was sore. Getting shot sure took it out of a guy.

But someone really didn't want him to sleep this morning.

"I'm just so sorry, Hyde," she sobbed all over his arm.

He tried to shake her off but her grip on his arm was so tight that she didn't even notice his wriggling; or his discomfort. "Don't even worry about it, Donna. It's fine. I'm fine. No need to cry, man."

She lifted her head finally and he wanted to laugh at her red puffy eyes but instead he forced a small smile. "No, Hyde, it's not fine. Your girlfriend shot you. Your girlfriend was a drug addict, and I didn't even know and I didn't even see it. You're one of my best friends and I could've lost you."

Dammit she was crying again. He'd already had tears this morning from Kitty and Fez and now it appeared to be Donna's turn. He wondered if they would've cried so much had he been shot by a random burglar instead of someone they'd let into their homes and lives. The whole situation was fucked up and everyone was feeling it, precisely why he hadn't told anyone other than Eric about how crazy Cassidy was to begin with.

But now they all knew and now they were taking it in turns to come and talk to him about it.

Like he wanted to talk right now.

"Yeah, well ya didn't. I'm still here, so we're good."

Donna rubbed her nose with a tissue and sniffed. "Hyde, you're far from good. Look at you, you're in hospital with a bullet stuck in your shoulder." She squeezed her eyes shut. "This is just so crazy."

Hyde looked at the door willing someone to walk through it and save him. He'd gladly take Fez sucking on candy over Donna crying at this point. Donna wasn't meant to be like this, she was meant to be strong, and chilled. She was supposed to suck it up and then cry all over Forman later. Speaking of Forman, where the fuck was he? Hyde had asked him to explain the details to everyone to save Hyde the job and the tears. He'd figured they'd all sit in the waiting room internalising what'd happened before coming in to see him and pretending everything was hunky dory. But no. They were now filing in one at a time and crying all over him. If he could walk he would've been out of that room 45 minutes ago. Hospital gown n all.

"Y'know, Donna, I'm pretty tired, so I should probably get some shut eye...doctor's orders n all." He nestled his head into his soft pillow hoping the visual prompt would aid the verbal one.

No such luck.

"I won't stay much longer, I know you need your rest," Donna said, sitting up a little in her chair. "I just want to say how sorry I am that we couldn't help. I could wring Eric's scrawny neck over this...I can't believe he freakin' knew how messed up she was and didn't tell us!"

"Hey, don't blame Eric. He didn't know everything, only the drugs part. Oh, and the part about me hatin' the chick. I'm sure if he knew she was gonna try n kill me he would've spoken up." Hyde patted her hand awkwardly and she smiled a little.

"You sure? Coz I don't know if that dillhole would recognise a dire situation if it slapped him in the face."

Hyde chuckled. "Well he saved my life didn't it? If that wasn't dire I dunno what is. Maybe your girlfriend isn't the pansy we all thought he was."

"Hmmm, maybe." Donna's smile disappeared and Hyde sighed. She wasn't gonna freakin' leave until she talked about _everything._ God he wished Jackie was here. His little pocket rocket would thrive on this drama and would for sure happily talk about it for hours on end. Where was her mouth when he needed it?

He cleared his throat. "Yeah, so, I kinda need to ge-"

"So, you and Jackie, huh?" Donna asked much to Hyde's dismay. Dammit! He wanted Jackie here to talk _for_ him, he didn't want to lie here talking _about_ her.

"Uh, yeah I guess."

"How long?"

Hyde shrugged. He wasn't a chick, he didn't mark down in his diary the exact moment they kissed, or fell for each other again, or did it. "I dunno, few weeks?"

Donna's gaze was intense, too intense for Hyde, so he studied the bowl of fruit next to his bed instead.

"Before or after Johnny...you know.."

"After," was all he said.

"Do you love her?"

Hyde's eyes narrowed as he turned to look at his friend. "C'mon, Donna, you know I don't love people." He grinned. She didn't. So he went back to counting grapes.

"I didn't ask if you loved people, I asked if you loved Jackie." She sat back in her chair and folded her arms. It reminded him of the time she'd found out about Cassidy and the baby. The redhead had been furious and had tracked him down at Grooves, ordering him out back so that she could unleash her fury. She had told him that day that she was done with him messing with Jackie and that if he loved her he had to prove it and make things right. He'd tried - real hard - to do that but life has a funny way of throwing up obstacles and fucking things up.

"You know the answer to that," he mumbled nervously.

The roll of her eyes told Hyde she was skeptical about his intentions and he didn't blame her. Jackie was her best friend and had cried on her shoulder way too many times over him.

"Y'know, Hyde, I wish I did know the answer to that because then maybe I could work out whether to buy her a bottle of champagne or 10 boxes of tissues. I mean, she just keeps taking you back and you keep fucking her around. Hasn't she been through enough? Can't you just let her get over you?"

Hyde ground his teeth. Who was she to come in here and grill him over Jackie? "What me and Jackie do or don't do has nothin' to do with you, Don-"

"Nothing to do with me? She's my best friend! I'm the one she comes running to when you screw nurses, or won't commit, or _do_ commit to someone else, or have a kid with someone who isn't her. I'm the one that watches her self-esteem crumble and I'm the one who has to try and build her back up again."

"Ain't you the one who also chooses my girlfriends over her?" Hyde shot back snidely, deciding he preferred sad, sorry Donna over angry Donna.

Donna's hand flew to her chest and her eyes widened. "What was I supposed to do, huh? You were both my friends and I never wanted to chose sides. I tried to be there for both of you and if that made me look like a bitch then I'm sorry. But, Hyde, you and Cassidy had a child together, I could hardly ignore her and help Jackie make voodoo dolls could I? I had to at least try n get along with her-" She shifted her weight in her seat and stared down at the floor "-I wish I hadn't bothered now."

The room went silent as they both contemplated what had been said. He knew Donna was right - about everything. Jackie had put up with way too much crap from him and he knew she deserved way better but he couldn't stand aside and let her find someone else. He wanted to be her way better. He had been given a third, or fourth, maybe fifth chance with her and he wasn't gonna stuff it up this time.

Hopefully.

"Hyde," Donna said softly as she leaned forward and held his hand. "You know I love you and I'm so grateful to God that you're okay. I'm just...I...I'm just begging you not to hurt Jackie again. These last few months have been going good for her and if you're not serious about her I think you should let her go now so she can put herself back together and carry on. Don't waste her time, dude."

Hyde rubbed the palm of his hand hard into his eye. Fuck he was tired. And now he had a headache. "I don't plan on wastin' her time, Donna."

"Good."

"Good." Hyde pounded his pillow a few times with the hand he could still use before eyeing Donna who hadn't stopped staring at him. "Well, seein' as we have that sorted, you mind if I get some shut eye now?" he asked. Donna stood up, shoving her hands into the pockets of her jeans.

"Still friends?" she said, stepping closer to his bed.

"Course we're still friends. Take more than some crazy girlfriends, wives, and bullets to make me hate ya."

Donna smiled but before she could say another thing the door flew open and Kelso strode in. Hyde hated to admit it - even to himself - but it was good seeing his oldest friend again and try as he might he couldn't shake the stupid grin that was now plastered on his face. Perhaps nearly dying had made him soft?

"Hyde! My man!" Kelso was at Hyde's bedside waiting for a high five. High five's weren't really Hyde's thing but nor was being shirtless in a bed surrounded by his friends so he gave in and slapped Kelso's hand. Kelso winced, the slap being harder than he had anticipated, and tried to smile through the pain.

"Howzit, Kelso?"

Kelso sat down in the chair Donna had just vacated, pain still etched on his face. "Dude, you have no idea what we've been going through. God, the vision of you lying in a pool of blood is gonna haunt me for a long time."

The grin on Hyde's face grew wider. "I guess every tragedy has a silver lining then?"

"What's the silver lining?" Kelso asked, looking between Donna and Hyde. "Big Red, what's the silver lining? Has Hyde got some sorta super powers now he has a bullet stuck in him? Coz, man, that'd be so cool. Like I bet we could just keep shooting him in that arm n the bullets would probably just ricochet off of it..."

Donna rolled her eyes and slapped his shoulder. "No you moron. The silver lining is that Hyde is now gonna haunt your dreams," she explained.

Kelso's jaw dropped and he furrowed his brow. "How's that a silver lining? Why would you wanna haunt me, Hyde?"

"Kelso, it was a joke, man. Course I don't wanna haunt you. There are many, many people I'd spend eternity haunting before you." Number one on Hyde's list had always been Edna; she deserved to have the shit scared out of her a few times. Paybacks for scaring the shit out of Hyde a million times when he was a child. The crap she pulled on him still haunted him.

"Oh, that's good." Kelso folded his arms and sat back in the chair. "Hey, I'm pleased you're okay. Woulda sucked if you'd died."

Hyde chuckled at his friend's honesty. "Yeah... yeah it would've." He watched Kelso for a moment, wishing he could find the words to thank the man. Sincerity didn't come easily, especially when he was talking to the boys, but this time he knew he owed Kelso a proper thank you, not a half-assed attempt complete with back slap. "Hey, Kelso, ah," he started, "Eric told me what you did, man. Y'know, you figuring out the Cassidy shit n goin' straight to Kenosha to get Jackie..."

Kelso shrugged. "No problem, Hyde, it's fine."

 _Too easy, I didn't even have to say the words 'thank you'._

"Nah, man." Hyde begrudgingly continued, taking care to avoid Donna's watchful gaze. "I'd hate to think what Cassidy would've done to Jackie if you hadn't gotten to her first-" Donna's eyes were nearly burning a hole in him now "-so, y'know, I really appreciate you lookin' out for her."

"I'll always look out for Jackie," Kelso said, his words suddenly making Hyde uncomfortable. "She's one of my best friends, just like you guys. But yeah, I know how much she means to you, dude, and once I knew you were gonna survive I thought I'd better save her so that you wouldn't kill me." Kelso grinned and Hyde grinned right back. For three years the guy had been his nemesis but Hyde finally knew now that he could count on Kelso, and more importantly, he could trust him.

"So where is she?" Kelso casually asked. "Bathroom?"

Donna shot Hyde a confused look before turning to Kelso. "What do you mean 'where is she'? She went home with you for a shower."

Panic washed over Kelso's face as he nervously stood up. "Oh yeah she did. We came back here together but I lost her when I...when I...when..." He was nearly at the door, stuttering like an idiot, while Hyde was trying hard to sit up.

"When you what, Kelso?!" Hyde yelled, clutching his stomach in pain.

Donna ran a hand over his forehead. "Hyde, lie down, you can't sit up." She looked over at Kelso. "I'm sure Jackie's fine, right Kelso? She's here at the hospital right?"

Kelso nodded, his eyes as big as saucers, and pulled the door open. "Yeah, yeah, she's round here somewhere."

"Kelso! Where is she?" Hyde bellowed, frantically jolting his head from side to side trying to avoid Donna's hand. "If something's happened to her, I swear, I'll-"

Just then Fez ran through the open door, tears streaming down his face. "Oh my goodness you guys! Jackie's just been brought in! In an ambulance!"


	21. Chapter 21

_Twenty minutes later..._

Mindful of his wounded stomach, Hyde carefully attempted to roll to his left and reach for the nurse's buzzer hanging over what he assumed was the drip feeding his body antibiotics. Upon hearing a loud sigh he stopped and rolled back on the bed.

"Well what do you expect me to do?" he muttered, staring up at the ceiling.

"That was exactly what I thought you'd do which was why I put the damn thing up there," Red stated, nodding toward the buzzer. "You have hounded those poor nurses enough in the last 20 minutes. When they know something, they'll come and tell you. You bugging them every three seconds is only making them angry." Red picked up the paper from his lap and continued reading leaving Hyde to wonder how anything the media was spewing out today could compare to what he was currently going through. Nothing was more important than knowing whether or not Jackie was okay; even cars that ran on water took a backseat.

"Can't you go find someone? Just see if anyone knows anything?" he asked Red.

The old man looked up from his paper with a raised eyebrow. "Son, Kitty will come back when she has any information. You just need to be patient. Why don't you eat some grapes or something." He handed Hyde the fruit bowl and Hyde shook his head.

"I don't wanna eat, I wanna know if she's okay. And where are those other morons? Why haven't they come to fill us in?"

"Steven, I'd say they're staying away because they know that you're being a whiney little girl-" Hyde's eyes widened in fury at his foster father's word's "-Now we're all worried about Jackie but you have to remember that she's in the right hands, whatever's happened to her. The doctors are looking after her and you lying there going on n on is not going to bring us news any faster."

"Yeah but-"

"Yeah but nothing, Steven. You've nearly torn your sutures once this morning trying to get out of that bed...so will you please, for the love of god, just lie down and wait? Preferably with your mouth closed."

Hyde did as he was told and lay still in his bed. He ignored the anger brewing like a storm in his head and the worry flooding his veins. Being helpless sucked. And being guarded by Red Forman sucked even more.

Putting his arm over his forehead he said "When I can move again I swear to god Kelso is a dead man."

Red slammed his newspaper shut and threw it on the floor. "We've been over this. You can't blame that idiot this time. He'd done a good job of looking after Jackie...it wasn't his fault she's a sneaky little minx and snookered off with the keys without him knowi-"

"Not his fault?" Hyde yelled. "He shouldn't have taken his eyes off her. He was supposed to be keepin' an eye on her, not havin' freakin' showers!" As far as Hyde was concerned it was Kelso's fault, no one else's. He knew Jackie nearly as well as Hyde did and he should've known that one way or another she'd put herself in harm's way. He should've watched her like a hawk until Cassidy had been caught.

Yeah, it was easier to blame Kelso for this mess. When Hyde was angry at him he could ignore the guilt that was almost killing him. He'd spent years blaming Kelso for his own fuck ups and he wasn't about to stop now.

For once, he told himself, this wasn't his fault.

It was Kelso's.

Red stood up and crossed his arms. "Look here, Steven. That boy drove like a bat outta hell to get Jackie after you were shot, and while the rest of us were getting some sleep and something to eat he sat in his dirty clothes for seven hours waiting for her and making sure Cassidy wasn't around. I know he tests all of our patience but he's a good kid and he means well and I'll be damned if I let you punish him for this."

Hyde clenched his fist at his side. Who else was he gonna punish? Someone had to be punished and it couldn't be Jackie...the only other option was Kelso. "Whatever," he mumbled as Red sat back down.

The next half an hour went by torturously slow with no sign of anyone; well no sign of anyone with Jackie info anyway. The nurse had come in to check Hyde's wounds which had been awkward. Before Red had taken the buzzer off him Hyde had laid into the nurse about her refusal to take him to find Jackie so now the old duck wasn't talking to him. Hopefully a shift change was coming soon; if he had to see nurses every twenty minutes he'd prefer they were the smiling ones who handed out lollipops, not the ones who scowled and thought he was an asshole.

Fucking nurses.

"She's okay!" Hyde's head jerked in the direction of the door and the beaming face of Kitty Forman rushing through it. "She needed stitches on her arm and has a few bruises but the main thing is she's okay!" Kitty giggled, practically skipping to the bed.

Hyde cleared his throat and tried to conceal his relief. "Well where is she? And what the hell happened?" he asked.

"She's just finishing up with the doctor and then I'm sure she'll be in to tell you all about it," Kitty explained, laying a hand over Hyde's. "Until then, why don't you get some sleep, honey? You've been awake and anxious all morning, it won't be helping your recovery any." Hyde was tired, to the point he was pretty much seeing two Kittys standing in front of him. But he couldn't sleep; not until he'd seen Jackie and found out what had happened between her and Cassidy.

"I'll sleep later."

Red was now next to Kitty, shaking his head. "There's no point, Kitty. This one won't listen. He'll sellotape his eyes open if he has to."

"Fine! I'll close my eyes for a minute if it'll keep you lot happy," Hyde said gruffly. "But I'm not going to sleep. I'm just resting my eyes."

Kitty smiled as he closed his tired eyes and pulled the sheet up over his chest. "Oh you're a good boy, Steven," she cooed. "You rest for a bit and before you know it Jackie will be here."

The darkness was good. So was the quiet. Hyde's body was bruised and battered making it hard to even breathe but the feeling was not new; he'd felt this way long before the shooting. He'd felt this way since his son had died and his only reprieve from the discomfort came in the form of a bubbly brunette with a killer smile and the heart of a saint. If he'd lost her today he would've well and truly lost everything. There would've been nothing worth fighting for.

Lulled by memories of times spent with his son and times spent with Jackie, Hyde found it increasingly difficult to fight the urge sleep. If happy memories filled his dreams rather than the nightmares that had plagued him for months perhaps it wouldn't hurt to succumb to it for a few moments? So he relaxed his muscles as images of Jackie and Johnny danced through his weary mind. In his dreams he had them both and they both loved him as much as he loved them. In his dreams Johnny was a happy little baby, doted on by Jackie, adored by Hyde, growing older in every dream. Why would he ever want to wake up from this perfection?

How could anything ever compare to his dreams?

Yeah, it couldn't hurt to dream for a little while.

...

 _Two hours later..._

When Hyde woke up all he could feel was a numb, tingling sensation in his right arm. He tried to move it but couldn't and when he looked down all he could see was shiny brunette hair.

 _Jackie._

He wiggled his arm underneath her trying to wake her. "Jackie! Wake up!" he whispered into the top of her head.

She stirred a little before turning her head and looking up at him, her eyelids still heavy. "Hey, you," she said, her voice husky from sleep.

"Hey yourself," Hyde smiled. Jackie pulled her body further up the bed until her head lay beside Hyde's on the pillow. It was then he noticed the dark black and purple bruising around her left eye and the small cut on her cheek. His stomach flipped and he suddenly felt sick. "What the fuck?" he said, his smile gone.

Jackie arched her body so that he could pull his arm out from under her, and she grabbed hold of his hand before resuming her position on the bed. "Ssssh, baby, I'm alright. It looks worse than it is. I'm fine." She placed their entwined hands on his chest and he glanced down at the thick bandage that covered her whole forearm.

"What the hell did she do to you?" A huge part of Hyde wanted to know every single detail about what had happened, but a fairly big chunk of him wanted to know nothing. That was the part that knew once he had the gory details he'd blame himself.

Jackie grinned deliciously. "You should be asking what I did to her. That bitch won't be getting out of bed for a week," she said proudly. "I got her back for you, baby. No one hurts my puddin' pop and gets away with it." She kissed him softly on the lips. He pulled away.

"I didn't need you to go there and 'get her back for me', Jackie. You said yourself that the cops needa deal with her. I can't believe you fuckin' did that. Do you know what could-"

"Steven," Jackie interrupted, propping herself up on her elbow, "everything's okay. I wasn't seriously hurt. The cops have her now and won't be releasing her anytime soon. Don't be angry with me."

Truth be told he wasn't angry at her. Or Kelso. He was angry with himself for bringing this craziness into everyone's lives. He was like Friday the 13th, or a black cat, or walking under a ladder - he brought bad luck to everyone.

"I'm not angry with you," he mumbled as Jackie stroked his sideburns. He gently ran his fingers over her bandage. "So how'd ya get cut?"

Jackie's eyes widened. "I got s _tabbed,_ Steven! How badass is that? Sixteen stitches, baby." Hyde shook his head as Jackie proudly recounted her bitch fight with Cassidy. If he had to estimate he would've said the story took around eight hours to retell, even though Jackie had only been at Cassidy's for around half an hour. It was fairly easy weeding out the extra bits Jackie had included for dramatic effect and by the time she was done he was pretty sure he had a decent enough picture of what had happened.

"I can't believe you told everyone that she was fucking Chris, man," Hyde said, trying to stop the laugh that so badly wanted to escape his mouth.

"I was seventeen. A seventeen year old can't be held responsible for what comes out of her mouth." Jackie raised her eyebrows. " _I_ can't believe she thought you were _nice._ That is not a word I would use to describe you back at high school."

"Hey, who took you to prom? And who let you buy him boots when you were all sad over Kelso?"

Jackie's face softened and she leaned down to kiss him again. "Oh yeah, I forgot about that. I guess you were quite nice." She pecked at his lips a few times and he cursed his left arm for not being able to move and pull her down on top of him.

"Gimme a proper kiss," he ordered.

"Oh, well since you asked so _nicely..."_ She giggled before placing her lips on his and parting his lips with her tongue. The warmth of her mouth, the touch of her fingers caressing his face, the weight of her leg over his, made it easy for Hyde to forget the bruises on her face and the cut up her arm. Right now they were just two horny teenagers foolin' around in the Forman's basement. Much like his dreams he didn't want the moment to end.

He didn't wanna deal with reality.

She broke away first and when he opened his eyes he saw a look of seriousness cross her face. "Mrs Forman said you should be able to come home next week," she said, tickling his neck.

Home? Where the fuck was home?

"Yeah, so the doctor said."

"I have a bit of grovelling to do to my landlord but I'm hoping I can keep my apartment so I thought, that maybe, you might wanna move in with me? Let me take care of you. Nurse you back to health." She winked and he smiled, even though he felt like complete and utter shit. She'd left her job and her apartment _for him_ and now she had nothing but was still willing to look after his sorry ass.

The feeling had returned to his right arm so he ran his hand through her hair. "I'm sure I can go back to the Forman's, you don't needa worry about me."

"But I want to worry about you. I love you remember?"

She loved him. He had put her through hell over the years but she still loved him. Why?

"Jackie, you have enough to deal with. You gotta get your job back, n your apartment...you don't need to add lookin' after a cripple to your list. I'll be fine at the Forman's for a bit." The basement. The freaking basement. He always ended up back there. It was as if it were his destiny to lurk below the happy 'normal' folk for his whole life.

Jackie furrowed her brow. "I can sort all of that no problem. By tomorrow afternoon I guarantee I have my job back and all my stuff unpacked. Please come home with me, baby?" Hyde was sure that she whispered 'please' into his mouth when she softly kissed him again, and it broke his heart. She was battered, bruised, and bleeding but still begging him to let her take care of him. Did he even deserve her?

"Okay," he said when she pulled away. Jackie's face lit up, even her eyes smiled above him.

"You'll come home with me?"

"Sure. Beats the basement n Red's moaning n groaning."

Jackie rolled her eyes and lay her head on his chest. "Oh, I'm flattered to know that living with me just beats out a manky old basement and a grumpy old man."

"And you should be flattered," Hyde teased as he stroked her hair and kissed the top of her head. "Because I think you forget about Mrs Forman's cooking. A man needs to eat, Jackie, so I'm expecting big things."

He couldn't see her face but he knew her well enough to know that she was biting her bottom lip, worried about how she was gonna cook for him everyday and not kill him. God he wished her cooking was his only worry...


	22. Chapter 22

_Friday, 28th August, 1981_

 _(Three weeks later)_

 _6.35pm_

 _WLIP Radio Station, Kenosha_

Jackie walked back to her cubicle and tossed the day's weather and traffic notes into trash can, relieved that her second week back at work was over. The shift change had been hard to adjust to and combined with the embarrassment of grovelling for her job back she had begun to feel like the office joke. Before the 'Seattle Incident' she had enjoyed her job tremendously. Sure it was hard sometimes getting up at 4am but morning reporting was fun and fresh and exciting. The morning drive-by programme had a huge following and was what most of the reporters aimed to be part of. But now she was stuck on the afternoon show, a less popular programme with hours that didn't suit her. She was sucking it up though and doing her job well hoping that one day the situation would swing back in her favour.

"Are you coming for a drink, Jackie? I think we could all use one after being stuck in here all afternoon." Lisa, the newsreader on the drive-home team, peered over Jackie's cubicle fanning herself with a magazine. Jackie eyed the tall woman's smart dress suit and pearls. She was so sophisticated and worldly and everything Jackie one day hoped to be.

"Not tonight, Lisa," Jackie replied, trying hard to not let her disappointment show. "Thanks for the offer but I have to get home. Maybe some other time?"

Lisa nodded understandingly. "How's he doing? Any better?"

"We're getting there," Jackie sighed. Everyone in the office knew about the shooting. Hell, everyone in Wisconsin knew what had happened, much to Hyde's chagrin. After a life spent flying under the radar it was killing Hyde that he had become front page news. A shooting in small town Point Place was news enough but the love triangle aspect had made the story even juicier so newspapers and magazines had clamoured for any little detail. When Jackie had asked for her job back the station had asked for the scoop and she had given it. Hyde had been furious.

And even though they were becoming yesterday's news Jackie wasn't sure Hyde was over it.

Lisa pulled her handbag over her shoulder as the rest of Jackie's co-workers signalled that they were ready to leave for the night. "Well, I better go," Lisa said with a smile. "Hopefully you can make it out with us next week huh? You look like you really need some time for you. It can't be easy working full time and looking after your boyfriend."

Jackie smiled and waved to the others before looking up at Lisa. "Like I said, we'll get there. He won't be like this forever," she said with just a hint of hope. "And yeah, next week sounds good."

"Good on ya, Jackie." Lisa turned to join the others. "Have a good weekend, hun."

"You too. Bye Lisa," Jackie called after her. Once everyone was gone Jackie reached under her desk for her handbag. It was close to seven, she had to get home, Hyde would be waiting for his dinner. She hated admitting it, even to herself, but everyday it was getting harder and harder to be enthusiastic about going home. He was always so miserable, so distant, so unwelcoming. It was a far cry from what she'd imagined it'd be like when he moved in.

When he'd first moved in things had been great. Hyde had seemed like he was really trying to make a real go of it with her to the point that he actually let her fuss over him. She bathed him, helped him dress and even cut up his food for him. They would watch movies together and laugh. But as much as Jackie tried to pretend everything was okay she knew, deep down, that every time he looked at her face all he could really see were the remnants of her black eye. His eyes would grow dark as they lingered too long on the yellow bruising and he would shut down. He never spoke about her bruises or her cut arm, actually, he never spoke about _anything_ and Jackie knew it was because he felt guilty. It didn't matter what she or anybody else said he would always blame himself for what had happened. And Jackie worried his guilt was going to tear them apart.

...

 _20 minutes later_

 _Jackie ( & Hyde's) Apartment_

The music was at a disturbingly high level even with the door closed and Jackie dreaded what her neighbours were thinking. God if her landlord heard it she would for sure be kicked out and she was already on shaky ground with him; she didn't need any fuel tossed on that fire. She unlocked the door and was greeted with the same sight she'd seen for the past 3 consecutive nights; Kelso, Fez, Eric and Steven in a circle. Sighing, she walked straight to the stereo and turned it down.

"Sorry, Jackie," Eric said from his spot on the couch next to Hyde. "We didn't know it was loud."

"I didn't even know it was _on_!" Kelso ginned before ramming a handful of potato chips in his mouth.

Walking into the kitchen Jackie threw her bag on the kitchen counter before immediately opening some windows. The air in the apartment was thick with smoke and she was sure she was getting high just being in there.

"I'm surprised you guys can even talk. Look at you all, you're beyond stoned...my god." The state of the guys, particularly Hyde, infuriated Jackie. She had reached out to Eric last week, concerned with how withdrawn Hyde was becoming, and they'd both agreed that one, if not all, the boys would make regular trips to Kenosha to check in on him while Jackie was at work. Having contact with people was important, but getting so stoned that he couldn't speak was just annoying. Hyde slept everyday 'til 11am and Jackie left for work just after one so her nights with him were important. However she was starting to think they weren't very important to him.

Burying her anger deep inside she walked over to Hyde and sat on the arm of the couch next to him. He didn't look up. "How was your day, baby? What did the physiotherapist say?" she asked with a smile.

Slowly he turned to look at her, his eyes bloodshot and barely staying open. "Huh?"

"The physio...for your arm, you had an appointment today...what did she say?" she asked again.

Hyde licked his lips a few times and stuck his tongue out. "I'm so thirsty. Are you guys thirsty?" He looked at his friends who all nodded wearily. "We need water. Water's good, man." God, he could barely talk. Jackie kicked off her heels and stomped into the kitchen to get him a glass of water. When she came back she scowled at the others.

"What have you lot done to him? Look at him, he's a mess!" she growled.

"We didn't do anything, Jackie. He had the film, we merely indulged with him a little," Fez said with puppy dog eyes.

"Yeah, we were being supportive friends. We supported our friend in his quest to get high as a motherfu-"

Jackie quickly cut Kelso off. "I get it, Michael. You're all as stupid as each other." She began clearing the empty cookie boxes and chippie packets off of the coffee table and threw them in the trash, trying hard not to let her threatening tears spill. Why wouldn't he talk? Why was he being like this? She swallowed hard when she felt someone walk up behind her.

"Jackie." Eric's voice was a soft whisper. "Look, I'm sorry you have to come home to this, I just don't know what else to do."

Jackie turned around. "Oh of course, Eric. What else is there to do with your friend who is injured and probably depressed but get blown out of your minds. Coz as you can see-" she gestured to Hyde on the couch "-it's really helping him."

Eric ran a hand through his hair and shrugged his shoulders. "Jackie, you know I -we- wanna help him but he doesn't want help. He just wants to sit and mope and not talk. The only time he smiles is when he's stoned. We're not bringing him the stuff, he's already rolling it when we get here."

Jackie knew Eric was telling the truth. Over the last two weeks she had started finding stashes all over the apartment and what had once become something her and Hyde indulged in together was now something he did on his own whenever her back was turned.

She sighed as a tear fell from her eye. "I know...I know that's all he wants to do. Its just, well, _I_ used to be able to make him smile and now it's like he doesn't even want to look at me. I just don't get what's going on with him."

"Jackie, in nine months Hyde has broken up with you, moved in with a chick he didn't even like, become a dad, buried his child, got back together with you, left the mother of his kid, got shot, and watched you walk into his hospital room after being stabbed. I dunno, but I think that's a lot for anyone to go through and to be honest he hasn't dealt with any of it properly. He just pushes it all deep inside and tries to forget." Eric cocked his head to one side and put a hand on Jackie's shoulder. "I know he's being a dick to you right now but I also know he really loves you, Jackie. Just hang in there okay?"

Jackie nodded before wrapping her arms around Eric's neck. Caught off guard he wobbled on his feet for a moment and then returned the hug with an arm around her waist. "Thank you, Eric," she whispered. "I know you're right, about everything, it's just hard y'know?"

"Yeah, I kn-"

"What's goin' on in here? Donna not givin' to ya, Eric so ya trying to get in on mine?" Hyde stood in the doorway, eyes half open, his jaw clenched. Eric quickly dropped his arm from around Jackie and stepped back.

"C'mon, Hyde, don't be silly, it's not like that!" the skinny man said with a nervous smile.

Jackie rushed over to Hyde. "Baby, I was upset and Eric was just talking to me."

Hyde glanced down at her before looking over at Eric. "Why would you talk to him when you're upset? You hate each other." Jackie was more than surprised at Hyde's paranoia; it had always been reserved for Kelso and Kelso alone. The fact he was questioning her and Eric was beyond absurd and she really wanted to laugh, but the tension in the room wouldn't allow such a reaction. So she placed an arm around his waist and tried to calm him down.

"Steven, you know Eric and I are friends and you also know that there is no way I'd ever go with a dork so I think we just need to put this down to too much weed."

"Yeah, man," Eric started, "and you know I think she's the devil, I wouldn't touch her for fear of bursting into flames."

"Well, I know what I saw, and don't think I haven't heard you two on the phone at night either. I'm not an idiot." Hyde shuffled his arm about in his sling, his right hand clenched tightly at his side.

 _How dare he talk like this,_ Jackie thought as she rubbed her hand across his lower back to stop herself punching him. Weed or no weed he was being an asshole and she was sick of it.

"Hyde, I only call to see how you ar-"

Jackie cut Eric off and turned to face Hyde. "Baby, you need some food. How about I heat up the dinner I made you this morning." She went to the fridge and pulled out meatloaf and mashed potatoes. "There's plenty for everyone. Eric, could you get the plates please?"

Hyde stepped in front of Eric. "I can get the plates. You go back out there," he said to his friend nodding toward the lounge where Fez and Kelso were now watching TV.

"Hey, it's no trouble, I can get them," Eric said.

"I _said,_ I'll get 'em." At Hyde's angry tone Eric quickly walked out of the small kitchen leaving a very tired Jackie and a very pissed off Hyde to sort dinner. Everything he did, from getting the plates to pulling out the cutlery, was difficult for him - high, with one arm in a sling - but he refused her help. When he dropped a glass he cursed so loud Jackie almost dropped the meatloaf all over the broken shards of glass on the ground.

"Steven, please go and sit down, baby. I can do this okay?" Tears were coming again and she'd be damned if she'd let them spill all over dinner. She needed him out of the room.

"I said I'd help, Jackie. What - I break one glass and now I'm an imbecile incapable of doing anything useful?" He tossed the forks onto the counter and stared at her, his aviators not concealing the anger in his eyes.

Jackie looked away and began slicing the loaf, embarrassed that their friends could all hear what was going on. This wasn't the perfect life she'd hoped for with Steven, this was more akin to what everyone had assumed their life would be. And it was killing her to have them proved right.

"Of course you're capable," she softly said. "I just mean that you don't _have_ to help. I want to look after you remember? Once you're better I'll be expecting you to do all the cooking, so you may as well make the most of me in the kitchen - it won't last forever." Jackie plastered a small smile on her face and prayed that everything would change once Hyde's arm was healed. It had to change. They couldn't be like this forever.

"Whatever," he mumbled as he sauntered out of the kitchen.

"Yeah, whatever," Jackie mumbled back.

...

 _Two hours later_

Jackie was curled up on her bed watching Dallas. Oh how the glitz, glamour, and bitchiness excited her. No matter how crappy her day had been the Dallas drama always managed to perk her up and make her forget as she got lost in a world of ranches and oil and shoulder pads and feuding brothers. It beat out morons and weed, dorks and foreigners every time. But when she heard said dorks call their goodbyes and close the apartment door she knew her reality would soon be walking into the bedroom they shared and for the first time she wished he wouldn't. She wanted to be left in the make-believe world of Dallas.

Ten minutes later the bedroom door opened and Hyde came in, a towel wrapped around his waist.

Jackie glanced over at him before resuming her gaze on the TV. "You should've called me, I would've helped you," she said.

Hyde was at the dresser searching for a pair of boxers. "Nah, I managed." He pulled on his shorts and threw the towel in the basket in the corner of the room. "You want me to leave the light on?" he asked, pointing a thumb into the lounge. Jackie shook her head, her heart pounding as he climbed into bed next to her. Usually on a Friday he didn't come to bed until after Dallas was finished so she found it both infuriating and intriguing that tonight he chose to come to bed early.

"Do you want me to turn it down?" She asked the question with full intentions of leaving the volume as it was, no matter his answer.

Hyde propped his pillows up next to her. "It's fine," he said, his arm slightly brushing against hers as he lay it on the duvet.

It was like they'd never met. Like they weren't two people who loved each other. Like they hadn't made love a thousand times before. And Jackie hated that she didn't even know why they were like this. She didn't know where it had gone wrong.

Trying hard to focus on Patrick Duffy, Jackie lay as still as she possibly could. If she moved she risked accidently touching him and _he_ had to be the one to make the first move. _He_ had been an asshole. She was not going to unintentionally invite any physical interaction tonight. No way.

To her surprise Hyde spoke first. "Sorry," he said so quietly she almost missed it.

"Pardon?" Yeah, he deserved to suffer.

He rolled over so that he was facing her and cleared his throat. Jackie could smell soap and shampoo and was struggling now with her earlier thoughts of not touching him. She loved being in his arms when he was fresh out of the shower.

"I said I'm sorry."

She still wouldn't look at him, even though she wanted to. "Sorry for what?"

"For earlier. I know I was a dick n you didn't deserve that."

"Did you say sorry to Eric?"

"No."

"I think he might deserve an apology too don't you think?"

He sighed, she rolled her eyes. Why was it so hard for him to admit when he was wrong? "Yeah, probably."

For what seemed like an hour, but in reality was more like five minutes, they both lay in silence; Jackie watched TV, Hyde watched Jackie. She waited for him to say something else but he didn't and it was becoming clear that he wouldn't anytime soon. Like so many times before it would be up to Jackie to try and fix them.

"Steven," she whispered when the ads came on.

"Yeah?"

"What's going on with you?" Jackie snuggled under the covers and turned to look at him for the first time since he'd come to bed. His face was sad, even his eyes had lost their blue and she wondered how long it'd been gone. Had she not noticed the darkness in his eyes or had she not bothered to look, choosing instead to play happy families with someone who wasn't happy.

"Whaddya mean? The physio reckons a few more weeks n my arm should be way better."

Jackie shook her head and put her hand over his under his pillow. "No, I mean with you...us...you're not the same. It's like you don't ever want to talk to me or be around me. I don't know what I've done."

"You haven't done anything."

"Is that the problem? Is it something I'm not doing, because, Steven, just tell me what it is and I'll do it." Sounding desperate just didn't matter to Jackie anymore. There was no way she would let go of this relationship without a fight. She had done that once, when a stripper wife had rolled into town, and she had regretted it ever since.

"No, Jackie, it's nothin' you haven't done, it's not you okay? You're cool, you're awesome." Hyde pulled their hands out from under the pillow and lightly kissed hers. It was the most affection he'd shown in two weeks and it nearly made her want to cry...again.

"Then what is it? Why aren't we like we used to be? Why aren't you like you used to be?" Dallas was on again but Jackie didn't care. The only thing she cared about was lying next to her holding her hand, and it felt amazing.

"I'm trying," he said rolling onto his back.

"Trying to what, baby?"

"I'm-" He dropped her hand and put his over his forehead, "- I'm tryin' to be me again. I'm trying to be less pissed off - happy - or whatever." Jackie didn't think it was possible, but she was sure her heart broke into a million pieces for Hyde, and in a surge of protectiveness she wrapped her arm tightly around him. They lay there for a while and then her hand found it's way to the small bandage over his stomach, and her fingers gently trailed over the smooth cloth. "Jackie, don't," Hyde growled. He hated her touching, or even seeing, his wounds just about as much as he hated seeing hers. She moved her hand back to his waist and hugged him.

"Tell me how to help you," she said before noticing the wet patches on her pillow from tears she hadn't noticed falling.

Hyde kissed the top of her head. "Just don't leave me."

"I won't." The sound of the TV became a blur as thoughts and ideas bounced around in Jackie's head. What could she do? How could she fix this? How could she fix him? Could she fix him? By the time she looked back at Hyde he was softly snoring. He looked so peaceful and Jackie hoped his dreams were better than his current reality. She stroked his cheek and gently put her lips on his. "Sleep well, baby," she whispered. "I love you and I'm not going anywhere."

* * *

 _A/N: Awwww don't hate! How could Hyde go through all he's been through and be fine in a couple of weeks? Well maybe he could...but not in my head! They'll get there in the end though. Thank you so much for reviewing x_


	23. Chapter 23

**_Warning: Little bit of sexy time toward the end. Don't read if you know you shouldn't._**

* * *

 _Saturday, August 29th, 1981_

 _11am_

 _Jackie & Hyde's Apartment_

Hyde sat on the edge on the bed staring at the floor. The sun was streaming into the room, flooding it with light and warmth and illuminating the framed photos of Johnny placed on Hyde's nightstand. Jackie had framed the pictures and while the gesture was nice, Hyde also found it somewhat irksome as slowly the apartment was turning into a shrine for the little boy; photos were popping up everywhere making it harder and harder for Hyde to forget. The photos were constant reminders of something Hyde didn't want to have to remember. Remembering was hard. Remembering hurt.

The sound of Jackie singing completely out of tune to Kim Carnes' 'Bette Davis Eyes' filtered through the closed door. It was Saturday morning, Jackie's cleaning morning, and she insisted that the only way she could get through such menial work was to blare her music as loud as she wanted. Under no circumstances was Hyde allowed to touch the stereo on a Saturday morning, ever. As much as he hated his mind being polluted with such crap, Saturday mornings had never really bothered him and even today he imagined her out there, no doubt wearing her tiny shorts, wiggling her ass as she dusted the apartment top to bottom, singing her little heart out. Ten months ago he would've been in there watching her clean until he couldn't stand it any longer and would rip the products out of her hands and carry her to the bedroom. The cleaning would end up taking the whole day and Jackie would moan that his interruptions were holding her up, but she never really put up a fight. Her form of resistance was a half-pie pout as she undid his belt buckle.

How he wished his life was still that carefree and easy.

The door opened bringing a strong scent of furniture polish, and Hyde turned to see Jackie standing there smiling. "Oh, you're awake?" she said as she walked over to him.

"Yip." Jackie stood in front on him and wrapped her hands around his head, pulling his face into her chest. She felt so nice, so soft, but he still found himself unable to hug her back.

"Want some help getting dressed?" she asked.

"I can do it, I'm nearly there."

Jackie looked down and smirked. He had managed to pull his jeans on but had struggled to do up the button. He felt like a hopeless mess. He was a hopeless mess.

"Looks like you need some help with that." Jackie raised one perfect eyebrow and nodded to his crotch. "You wanna hand?" she asked suggestively.

He shook his head, stood up, and began fiddling with the offending button. It was times like these he envied dorks who didn't give a fuck what they wore. Sweatpants and shorts would've made life so much easier but he just couldn't bring himself to rock them during the day. His reputation was already in tatters and he wasn't about to give people more to talk about.

"Look, all done," he said with a little too much pride in his voice. Cringing a little - what 21 year old man gets off on doing up his own damn button? - he stepped around Jackie to get to the dresser. Pulling the drawer open his lips curved slightly upward. There were his tees, ironed and folded into neat piles, on top of a horrendously floral, scented, drawer liner. He'd never had so much space for his clothes before and it was nice having someone take care of him the way Jackie did, although he could've done without the drawer liners.

"So," Jackie started as she began making the bed, "I was thinking, why don't you come with me to the grocery store today? We have dinner at the Forman's tonight and I said I'd take a dessert and I thought you could come with me to get the things I need. Maybe we could even go somewhere for lunch? It's such a beautiful day out there, shame to waste it in here."

Hyde pulled on a Ramones t-shirt and sighed. "Why are we going to the Forman's tonight?"

"For dinner, Steven, I just told you that."

Hyde watched as she positioned what looked like 87 cushions on the bed. "Yeah but why can't we have dinner here? What's the point of going all the way to Point Place for somethin' we can do here?"

"Because it's nice to go out and see people. We have dinner here every single night." She was dusting now, picking up the photos and delicately wiping the glass before carefully setting each one back in it's place. Everything she did was so dainty and perfect. She was so perfect. And he was ruining her, messing up her ordered life.

"But I like having dinner here." Hyde sat himself on the window ledge, the hot sun beating down on his back, while Jackie cleaned their bedroom around him.

"So you're telling me you'd rather eat my cooking than Mrs Forman's? I don't believe you." Jackie grinned over at him and he couldn't help grin back. She was so damn cute.

"Believe it, babe. I'd rather stay here and eat whatever you rustle up than go to the Forman's tonight," he said truthfully. It certainly wasn't Jackie's cooking that had him wanting to stay home on a Saturday night; she still couldn't cook for shit. It was the thought of going out and seeing people, people who'd want to talk, that had him reeling.

"Well sorry, Steven, I've said we'd go and so we're going. It'll do you good getting out, you haven't left the apartment in over two weeks and it's not fair making the Forman's come here to see you all the time. They're so old-"

"Jackie, they're not that old-"

Jackie raised an eyebrow. "Yes they are, they're over 30, _well_ over 30. They're old. So you need to visit them once n a while."

"Fine," Hyde grumbled as he shuffled off the ledge and onto his feet. "But I'm not going to the grocery store. You're on you're own with that one." He turned his back to her and walked out of the room, resigned to the fact he would have to go the Forman's tonight, but adamant that he would not be going to town with her today.

"Oh you are soooooooo coming, mister!" Jackie yelled after him. He rolled his eyes and continued into the kitchen for his usual breakfast of muesli and fruit. Cooked breakfasts in the Burkhart residence were reserved for Sundays and Sundays alone. Jackie reasoned that if they ate fry ups everyday they would get fat and how could they be the hottest couple in Wisconsin if they were both fat? Hyde had tried to bargain for at least two mornings of bacon and eggs but she wouldn't have a bar of it. She also wouldn't have a bar of sugary cereals so every morning he ate cereal that tasted like cardboard and reminisced about his glory days sat at Kitty's kitchen table.

Just as Hyde sat down at the counter with his bowl of crap the phone rang. Knowing that he wouldn't answer it Jackie bounded into the kitchen and picked it up. She breathed out a 'hello' before her expression changed and she handed the phone to him. "It's Susan Wilson," she said, her hand covering the mouthpiece.

Hyde sat for a moment and chewed the cardboard in his mouth. He couldn't be fucked talking to Cassidy's mom but he'd always known this day would come. Taking the phone from Jackie he cleared his throat. "Hello."

"Hyde, this is Susan," she said so matter-of-factly it almost felt like a business call.

"Hey, Susan, what's up?"

"I'm letting you know that we have cleaned out _your_ house and that there are a few things left boxed up in the lounge that you might want. If they're not collected by Wednesday then they're going to the tip."

The house had crossed Hyde's mind a couple of times in the last few weeks but he'd chosen to ignore it. He couldn't deal with going back there. It was hard enough trying to move forward, he couldn't risk looking back. "Um, thanks for doing that. Look I have what I need outta there, the rest can go." He stirred his muesli around with the spoon, avoiding Jackie's eyes fixed on him. She was dying to hear what Susan had to say and would want a retelling of the whole conversation word for word. Dammit.

"Oh, okay then, if you're sure there's nothing you want-"

"I'm sure. Hey, thanks again for clearin' it out."

"Well someone had to, and as usual it was left up to me to fix the mess you and Cassie created." Susan was pissed off, no doubt about it, and Hyde didn't blame her. But he also didn't feel like an argument with her today.

He swallowed hard. "Susan, I'm sorry, about everything-"

She cut in. He knew she would. "Are you though, Hyde? Are you sorry? You haven't once called me to ask about Cassidy. You haven't tried to make amends or explain yourself-"

Now he was pissed off. "Explain _myself_? What's there to explain huh? Your daughter shot me 'cause she's a nut job, what else is there to say?" Susan sniffed a little and Hyde suddenly felt bad for making the woman cry. Cassidy was her daughter and he could only imagine what it'd be like to have your grandson die and then your daughter go to prison. Lowering his tone he said, "Susan, I'm sorry okay? How is...she?" He turned away as Jackie threw her hands up in the air and glared at him, but not before catching a glimpse of the cut that ran nearly the length of her forearm. It turned his stomach every time he saw it. This time was no different.

"Nice of you to ask, _Hyde,_ " Susan said, sarcasm dripping off every word. "She was moved from the hospital to a psychiatric facility last week. Her ribs are still mending, the doctors said it'd take a while. Your little girlfriend sure has a lot to answer for." Hyde bit his tongue. Three cracked ribs and a few bruises from Jackie were no less than Cassidy deserved for all she'd done but he had to play nice. So far no charges had been laid against Jackie but if he pushed Susan too far that could change.

"Psychiatric facility?" It didn't surprise him at all that that was where Cassidy was, Lord knows it's where she needed to be.

"Yes, the one in Madison. She's always suffered depression but the doctors are now testing for schizophrenia, maybe bipolar, they're not sure. Her behaviour was extreme-"

"No kidding."

Susan continued, "-and so unlike her so we need to get to the bottom of it. Cassidy needs help, not prison."

Hyde nodded although he could care less where the chick ended up, so long as it was away from him and Jackie. "Yeah, I guess," he mumbled.

"Which is why I hope that when this ends up in court you won't make things too difficult for her. I mean, she was your son's mother, and she's been through so much, and...and..." Dammit she was crying again. Between her crying and Jackie's piercing glare Hyde was beginning to wish he hadn't gotten up this morning. "...and she's my daughter, Hyde. I can't have her put away for years and years."

"From what I hear court isn't gonna be anytime soon so how's about we cross that bridge when we come to it, huh?"

"Yes, I suppose you're right-"

"Okay then, Susan, thanks again for doing the house, appreciate it." Hyde went to hang up the phone but Susan wasn't quite done.

"One more thing," she said, much to Hyde's annoyance. "Is there any chance you could pay Cassie a visit? She's been asking after you and I know it'd mean a-"

Hyde looked over at Jackie leaning against the sink. Just a tinge of yellow was visible around her eye, so faint that no one else would probably notice it. But Hyde did. He knew every line, freckle, and blemish on her face and thanks to him and Cassidy the only part of her he ever seemed to see lately was the cut on her cheek and the fading black eye. Still looking at Jackie he said into the phone, "Not a chance in hell," before slamming it onto the hook.

"Well?" Jackie rushed over to him. "What did she want?"

Hyde looked back down at his soggy cereal. "She cleaned out the house, wanted to know if I wanted anything."

"And? You talked about more than that. I heard you say something about a psychiatric place...have they locked Cassidy up in the looney bin?"

"Yeah. She went into the one in Madison last week or somethin'."

Jackie sat down on the barstool next to him, eyes wide with curiosity. "Why? What do they think is wrong with her?"

"Jackie." Hyde dropped his spoon into his bowl and stood up. "I really don't feel like talkin' about this shit now alright? Cassidy's in Madison, the house is packed up, it's done. I'm done." He needed a smoke, real bad.

"Done with what? I only asked a couple of questions, Steven. This concerns me too you know."

He fucking did know. He knew all of this crap concerned Jackie and it made him sick.

"I need a smoke," he said, walking into their room to get his stash. A smoke would relax him. A smoke would help him forget for a bit.

Jackie was hot on his tail. "No, Steven, you don't need any weed this morning, we're going out remember?"

"I already told you, I'm not comin' to the fuckin' grocery store with you. You're a big girl, Jackie, you can buy dessert on you're own." He rummaged around in his drawer and found his weed tin. Just the look of the shiny, silver box made him feel better. But before he could even close the drawer Jackie had ripped the tin out of his hand. "What the hell, Jackie, give it back, man!"

Jackie held the tin with both hands behind her back. "You don't need this, baby. You need to get out. You need sunshine." Her damn eyes were glazing over with tears. The second woman he'd reduced to tears in ten minutes.

"Don't tell me what I need."

Her pink lips trembled as she walked backwards toward the door. Was she scared? Of him? "Steven, you told me last night that you were gonna try. You said you wanted to be happy again. Let me help you."

Hyde ran his hand over his beard, trying to calm himself. It was dumb to fight over weed, he knew that, but she didn't realise that weed was helping him. Going to the grocery store and having everyone whisper about him wasn't gonna do anything but make him angrier.

"Please, Jackie, gimme the tin," he said softly. He held out his hand but she wouldn't give him what he wanted.

He watched her inhale sharply and puff her chest out, readying herself to take him on. He felt bad for her, she was never gonna win with him. "No, I'm not giving this to you because you don't need it. All you do everyday is sleep and smoke this shit, when what you need to be doing is talking...preferably to me, your girlfriend. That's right, Steven, I'm your girlfriend in case you forgot. But this tin-" she held out the tin, he couldn't take his eyes off of it, "- sees more of you than I do. You are shutting me out and I hate it. Please let me help you." Jackie was crying now. Fully crying. The tears dropped out of her eyes, trickled down over the yellow bruising, before crossing over the small cut on her cheek. He wanted to wipe them away, but he couldn't bring himself to touch her face. He didn't want to hurt her anymore than he already had.

"Have a smoke with me," he offered, forcing his eyes to look into hers instead of watching the tears.

Her barefoot stomped on the floor and her expression quickly changed from sad to angry. "I don't want a fucking smoke with you! I want to _talk_ to you! I want us to go out together...to be a normal couple! I don't want -" her hands darted out in front of her gesturing between them, "-this!" Bursting into a fit of sobs Jackie threw the tin at Hyde and fell onto the bed, burying her head into the pillows. Hyde stood still, looking at the tin, then at Jackie, then at the tin, then back at Jackie. Finally, he sat down next to her, gently patting her hip.

"Sorry," he quietly said, as her body shook underneath his hand. Jackie said nothing but after a few minutes her crying subsided and she turned to look at him.

"You know," she whispered, wiping her eyes, "you say sorry a lot now. It's getting kinda old."

"You sayin' I should stop apologising?" Hyde grinned and raised his eyebrows but the grin quickly disappeared when Jackie scowled at him.

"No, I'm saying you should stop doing the shit you need to apologise for. I'm the best girlfriend you're ever gonna get, Steven, and you're treating me like crap."

Jackie was right. Totally, without question, right. But Hyde just didn't know how to fix anything. When he looked at her he felt guilty. When he looked at photos of his son he felt guilty. When he talked to Cassidy's fucking mother he felt guilty. It was slowly eating him up and he didn't know how to stop it.

He dared himself to touch her, to run his hand through her hair like he had a trillion times before, and her face softened when he did. "I know, Jackie, and you're right, about everything."

Jackie stroked his face. "So how are you gonna make things better?" she asked.

"Um, y'know, I haven't thought that far ahead yet-"

Wrapping her hand around the back of his neck Jackie pulled his face closer to hers. "You could start by kissing me. You haven't done that in a while." Her tongue swept over her bottom lip and Hyde closed his eyes. He would think of that, not the cuts and bruises, and try and give Jackie what she wanted.

"I can do that," he said before capturing her mouth with his. Her lips were so tender, her mouth was warm and full of want, so Hyde gripped a handful of her hair and deepened the kiss. She arched her back, wrapping both arms around his neck, pulling him down on top of her. As he tried to manoeuvre himself a sharp pain shot across his stomach and he flinched.

Jackie quickly broke the kiss. "Oh my god! Are you okay?"

Hyde pecked at her swollen lips. "Yeah, babe, I'm fine." He wasn't really fine and he wasn't really sure how this was gonna work. He had one arm in a sling and a bandaged stomach, hardly lover of the century material. But Jackie wanted this, she wanted to be close to him again. He had to find a way to make it work.

Or not.

Jackie pushed him up. "It'll be better if you're lying down, baby. Let me do the work, just let me know if I hurt you." Before he knew it he was lying down and Jackie was already straddling him. This girl wanted it. Bad.

He grinned as she carefully removed his sling. "You been plannin' this, doll? You got it all figured out huh?"

Raising an eyebrow she stopped what she was doing and stared him in the eye. "Yes, Steven, I do have it all figured out. So be quiet and help me get this ratty t-shirt off you."

Hyde lifted his arm as she removed his tee. "I like it when you take charge," he said before slapping her ass.

"If you like it so much you should start listening to me more often."

Within minutes Jackie had them both stripped down to nothing and the warmth of her naked body on his had every nerve in Hyde's body aching for her. Twirling a finger in his curls Jackie stared at him for a moment, her mouth only centimetres from his. "Oh, puddin'," she sighed, "I've missed you."

His right hand reached up through her hair. "I've missed you too," Hyde admitted before pulling her mouth down onto his. She tasted so sweet, like candyfloss, and he just wanted more of her sugary goodness. All he could think about was her sweet mouth and how hot it felt to have her hovering above him on all fours. He had to have her.

Deepening the kiss, his hand trailed from her hair down her smooth back and to her buttocks. He gently pushed her ass down, so that her core was so close to his hardness he could feel her heat. Jackie let out a little gasp when she felt his erection press between her legs and she stopped kissing him. He opened his eyes and was sure he got harder, if that was even possible. Jackie was gazing down at him with dreamy eyes, and plump pink lips, her hair tumbling over her shoulders. Fuckin' perfection.

"You sure, baby?" she asked. "I don't wanna hurt you." Her face was the picture of innocence but when she lowered her head and started teasing his neck with her tongue her game was up. He was so damn hot all over he needed some relief.

"C'mon, Jackie," he whispered into her ear, "get on." Jackie giggled, as she nibbled and licked his neck and jaw, her warm centre still hovering just out of his reach. Curse his damn stomach! Try as he might he could not thrust himself into her. He was at Jackie's mercy and she was loving every bit of it.

"Do you want something?" she asked seductively, leaving a trail of wet kissed across his neck as her hands wove through his hair.

Hyde was still pushing on her ass but it was pointless. "Yes, Jackie, you know what I want." She was driving him crazy with a desire he hadn't felt since he was a teenager. It was like he was seventeen and all worked up and hot and bothered only for the chick to remind him she was late for curfew and had to go home. It was frustrating as hell.

But then he remembered he could do something now that he couldn't do to those innocent teenage girls. Without warning he shuffled down the bed a little and quickly slid a finger into Jackie. He felt her breath catch and her attention left his neck.

"Naughty boy," she growled as he pumped into her wetness, much to her delight. "Oh my god." She was moaning, and sucking his lip, her tongue darting in and out of his mouth, as she moved her body in time with his hand. Then suddenly, he stopped. "Steven, keep going."

"Do you want something, Jackie?" Hyde grinned as he put his hand under his head and looked up at disappointed Jackie.

With both eyebrows raised she said, "oh you're good alright," before lining herself up and sliding onto him, enveloping him in her warmth and sweetness.

Half an hour later Hyde was spent, and rather proud that he'd lasted that long with Jackie riding him like a pro. She was lying with her head on his chest and her leg across his, breathless. "That was amazing," she panted, her body hot and sweaty.

He kissed the top of her head. "Sure was." It was as though he was in some post-sex afterlife. Every part of him felt good. Tired, but good. He hadn't felt this close to Jackie in the last couple of weeks, emotionally or physically. Perhaps all they needed was to get their sex life back on track and then everything else would fall into place? They'd always been hot together and even with Hyde partially disabled they still were.

Yeah, sex was all they needed. He hadn't felt guilty once since they'd both been naked.

Jackie rolled over onto her back and sighed. "God, I need a shower. We still have to go to the store."

"You're not still makin' me go with you are you? Haven't I done enough exercise today?" Hyde smirked and picked up her hand, kissing it.

"Excuse me, _I_ did all the work just then buddy. You so owe me. I'm all sweaty thanks to you." She furrowed her brow. "And yes, you do still have to come with me."

"How's about we make a deal...you go to the store, and while you're there I'll take a shower then we'll both be ready to go to the Forman's when you get back? Sound fair?" Hyde was feeling good right now, he didn't wanna ruin it with unnecessary public scrutiny. "Please, babe?"

Jackie turned to face him, her eyes wide with hope. "Promise you'll be ready _and_ that you'll act like you want to be there when we get to the Forman's? Tonight means a lot to me, Steven, we haven't been out as a couple since last year. I want everyone to see that we're good...that we're gonna make it."

"I promise, Jackie, we'll have a good night, okay?"

...

 _Forty minutes later..._

Hyde stretched out and rolled over. Jackie had only been gone a couple of minutes but he figured he should get moving; she was excited about tonight and it was nice seeing her happy for once, he didn't wanna ruin it. He swung his legs over the side of the bed and bent down to pick up his discarded clothes. As he crouched over something caught his eye, something shiny. His tin.

No.

He was not gonna ruin it. Jackie was happy. He felt pretty good too.

He didn't need to be stoned.

He picked up the tin and tossed it onto the nightstand, accidently knocking over one of the photo frames. Hyde looked to the ground. Johnny. There he was, stuck in time smiling from behind the shattered glass. Bright blue eyes that would never look at Hyde again. Tiny little hands that would never grow any bigger. A gummy little mouth that would never say a word.

Without even thinking Hyde rolled a joint and smoked it.

Yeah.

He felt better. And Jackie would never know.

After a quick shower he went back to his bedroom and got dressed. Sitting on the bed to put on his boots he noticed the broken photo frame and the tin next to it.

He rolled a joint and smoked it.

He felt better. He just needed a little sleep.

A little nap wouldn't do any harm.

He closed his eyes.

...

 _Five hours later_

The last of the setting sun penetrated through Hyde's eyelids and as much as he tried to fight it he knew he had to get up. Jackie would be home soon and they had dinner at the Forman's. He opened his eyes and yawned loudly.

"Jackie! Babe, are you home?" ABBA was blaring from the lounge much to his dismay so his girl had to be around somewhere. He sat up and the first thing he saw was his weed tin with a piece of paper sitting on top of it. Running a hand over his tired face he yawned again before picking up the note and reading it.

 _It's 5pm. You have broken my heart. I asked for one night, Steven, one night._

 _Fuck you._

Hyde's stomach dropped. He checked his watch, 6.25pm.

He had fucked up. Again.


	24. Chapter 24

_Saturday, August 30th, 1981_

 _6pm_

 _Forman Residence_

Hiding her emotions was not something that came easily to Jackie Burkhart. When she was kicked off the cheerleading team she made sure everybody knew about it. When Kelso and Hyde had cheated on her she openly sobbed on the nearest shoulder. And when her daddy went to prison the basement was nearly flooded with the tears of a girl whose life was falling apart. But right now, standing in the Forman's kitchen, Jackie was smiling as she listened to Kitty waffle on about the price of pork chops. Her heart was broken, her mind was all over the place, but still her smile remained.

No one needed to know about the latest Hyde mess.

"They are just so cheap, Jackie! I very nearly bought 6 packs. I mean, it's pork, and the boys just love pork. You really should get down there on Monday and get some for Steven. Pork chops and mashed potatoes, he'll love it!" Kitty smiled proudly as she pulled the roasting tray out of the oven and turned the juicy chops before sliding the tray back in and closing the door. "My poor Steven," she said with a small shake of her head, "it's a real shame he wasn't up to coming tonight. I'll do a big plate up for you to take home for him."

Jackie continued smiling and poured herself a glass of wine. "That'll be great Mrs Forman, I'm sure he'll be thrilled."

 _Because he'll no doubt have the freaking munchies the asshole._

Kitty picked up her wine glass and sat down next to Jackie at the table. "Now tell me, sweetie, how is Steven doing? He was very quiet when we saw him on Tuesday. Is everything alright with him?" Her forehead was lined with worry and Jackie didn't have the heart to tell her that Hyde wasn't alright and was now relying heavily on drugs to help him get through the day. She didn't want to concern Kitty with issues that Jackie herself should be taking care of. The problems were between her and Hyde and they had to fix them. Eventually.

"He's fine, he really is," Jackie said as sincerely as possible. "Sure he gets a bit quiet sometimes but he's still in a fair bit of pain, and, well, he's been through a lot you know?" Was she trying to reassure Mrs Forman or herself that Hyde's problems were no big deal? Jackie wasn't sure.

"Well make sure he talks to his doctor about pain meds, Jackie. The pain should be bearable, it shouldn't be bringing him down okay?" Kitty patted Jackie's hand a few times and smiled just as Eric and Donna walked in.

"Hey, midget!" Donna walked straight over to Jackie and enveloped her in a hug, something she had been doing quite regularly lately. Jackie put her arm around the redhead's waist and squeezed. She was enjoying their rekindled closeness, especially now Hyde was being so difficult.

"Hi, Donna," she said as Donna pulled away. "Hi, dork." Eric rolled his eyes at Jackie's greeting and looked around.

"Where's Hyde?" he asked.

Jackie shifted uncomfortably in her chair and took a large sip of her wine.

"Our poor Steven wasn't feeling well enough to come tonight," Kitty explained. "So we'll do up a big plate for Jackie to take home for him. Oh! Donna, did you see that the butcher is having a huge sale on pork chops? It's just fantastic. You must go and buy some on Monday, you just never know when you'll see prices like that again."

Donna laughed and winked at Jackie. "Yes, Mrs Forman, I'll be sure to get down there on Monday-"

"Yes you must. I've told Jackie too. My boys love their chops, don't you, Eric? So you girls need to buy them when they're cheap."

Kitty rambled on for another five minutes about all things relating to pork chops while Jackie imagined smacking Hyde over the head with one. She still couldn't believe he had gotten himself so wasted that afternoon, especially after she thought they'd made some progress. Silly her had actually believed that he wanted to try, that he wanted to please her, and not just sexually. But he was full of crap.

"You okay, Jackie?" Eric quietly asked while Donna and Kitty moved to the freezer so Kitty could show off her purchases.

Jackie shrugged. "Same as always, Eric. I'm on my own."

Eric's eyes darted toward his girlfriend and mother before looking at Jackie and nodding toward the door. Jackie picked up her wine and followed him outside where they leaned against the El Camino. She waited for him to say something but he just stood there, in his dorky Star Wars t-shirt, with his arms folded across his chest.

"Well?" Jackie said. "Are we just gonna stand here all night or are you gonna ask me what happened?"

He turned to look at her. "What happened, Jackie?"

"He promised me he'd come tonight. He promised me he would try and be happy." She scuffed her sandal back and forth over the concrete and avoided looking up at Eric. "But as soon as I left the apartment he got himself so stoned that he went to sleep and couldn't be woken. Not even ABBA at full volume could wake the prick."

"Oh-"

"Yeah, 'oh'. He's an asshole, Eric. Why do I keep going back to someone who doesn't really want me?"

"C'mon, Jackie, Hyde wants you. We all know that," Eric said as he put a reassuring hand on Jackie's shoulder. "You two were gonna run away together remember. He was gonna leave everything behind to be with you. Why...I don't know, but there must be something about your shrill tone and never ending need to organise make up that has him hooked."

Ignoring Eric's jibes, Jackie continued. "Us leaving together wasn't because he wanted me, it was because he wanted to get away from _her._ He was just taking me along for the ride so to speak. He just didn't want to be alone. And I fell for it." Jackie bit her bottom lip to stop herself from crying. "I'm such a fool."

Eric ran a hand over his chin, which, Jackie had noticed, was covered in stubble. He looked older, less like the scrawny teenager she had spent years antagonising. "Look, I'm telling you, if he didn't wanna be with you he wouldn't be at your apartment. He's just going through a bad time and yeah it sucks that you have to deal with it day in day out but it'll get better, Jackie. It will."

"When?" Jackie's gaze finally left the driveway and fell on Eric. "When will it get better, Eric? I can't keep living with someone who ignores me. I spent my childhood living with people who did that, why should I spend my twenties doing the same?"

Eric opened his mouth to say something but the sound of the sliding door opening stopped him. Donna stepped out wearing a large smile and holding an even larger glass of wine. "Oh man," she said as she approached them, "if I never have to talk about pork chops again it'll be too soon."

Jackie giggled. "Tell me about it! It's all I've heard about since I got here. I was beginning to wish Red would hurry up and get home from fishing. Talking about fish would've been a welcome break from talking about pork."

Donna clinked her glass against Jackie's. "Agreed," she said. "hey, Jackie, Hyde's on the phone for you."

Jackie's whole body tensed and she looked over at Eric nervously. Talking to Hyde was just something she didn't want to do right now. He was either going to be angry at her for leaving without him or he was going to apologise, again. Talking about pork chops was the preferred option if it was still available.

"Oh, Donna would you mind telling him I'll call him later? It's just nice, y'know, having a wine and chatting to you guys."

Donna's face grew puzzled. "He said he just wants a minute. I think he was hoping you'd go and pick him up, he's feeling better now or something."

Her grip on her glass tightening, Jackie felt her face flush red with anger. "I can't go all the way back to get him, I've been drinking," she said before sculling the rest of her wine, the acidic after taste lingering in the back of her throat.

Eric stepped forward and pulled his keys out of his pocket. "I'll go get him, I haven-"

Jackie put her hand on Eric's arm stopping him. "No, Eric, you're not going to get him. He didn't want to come before so we're not all rushing around after him now just 'cause he's changed his mind." Jackie flipped on her feet and made her way inside. "I'll go talk to him."

As she entered the kitchen she saw Kitty on the phone flapping on about pain medication and doctor's visits. Stopping briefly to pour herself another wine Jackie suddenly felt dizzy at the thought of talking to him. She needed a break. From everything.

"She's right here, honey, I'll put her on. Love you!" Kitty handed the phone to Jackie and went back to the stove to check the peas.

Pulling the phone into the lounge and sipping furiously on her drink, Jackie prepared herself to speak. "Hello?"

"Hey, Jackie. Come pick me up?"

The nerve of him! "Excuse me? I'm not coming to get you, Steven."

"Look, I'm sorry, okay? I shouldn't have had a smoke, I fucked up," Hyde said, his tone softened.

"Yeah you fucked up alright, and I'm sick of it," Jackie whispered into the phone, "and I'm also sick of your apologies."

"I'll make it up to you, babe, I promise. I'm all ready, just come get me n we'll talk."

"Talk? We won't talk, Steven, 'cause you'll probably be stoned again. Besides, I can't come, I've been drinking." Jackie sipped her drink and let out a big 'aahhh' for Hyde's benefit. She hoped he was pissed off and hungry and lonely. It was no less than he deserved.

"Drinking?" Yip, he was pissed off. Jackie smiled. "How are you gonna get home?"

She shrugged. "I'll probably stay here or go back to Eric n Donna's house and stay the night there."

"I want you to come home, Jackie." Hyde's voice was low and even, the way he always sounded when he was serious and trying to assert authority.

"Well I can't tonight. I'll come back in the morning."

"Fuck!" Jackie jumped a little when he yelled. "I'll come n fuckin' get you then." He hadn't driven since the shooting but Jackie knew that if he was desperate enough he would make himself, pain or no pain.

"You can't," she said. "I have the Camino and I also have the keys to my car. I need some space, Steven, we'll just talk about this tomorrow okay? There's leftover meatloaf in the refrigerator, I'll see you in the morning." As she hung up the phone she heard Hyde yell at her to wait but she didn't care. He'd had his chance and he'd blown it, so now she wanted him to sit and stew. Although she knew he'd probably just roll himself a joint and go back to sleep.

"Is he coming, dear?" Kitty asked as Jackie finally let go of the phone.

Jackie took a deep breath and turned around. "No, Mrs Forman. there's plenty of food at home so he's just going to watch some TV and get some rest. We both decided it's probably best that I stay in Point Place tonight so that I don't wake him when I get home." Jackie felt bad lying to Kitty, but it was better than the truth. Hyde's surrogate mother had lost enough sleep over him lately, she didn't need to be worrying about him and Jackie. "Rest assured though, Mrs Forman, he is super excited about me taking those chops home for him tomorrow!"

Kitty smiled proudly as she mashed the potatoes into a fluffy texture. "Oh goodie! He does love his chops!"

...

Once dinner was over, dishes were done, and Red's fishing stories had been told Donna and Jackie retreated to the porch with their wines. The air was cooler, cool enough to elicit goosebumps on Jackie's arms, but was also a welcome relief from how claustrophobic she had felt inside. Hyde, Hyde, Hyde. Between pork chops and fishing the only other topic had been him and it was doing her pretty little head in.

"Everything okay with you?" Donna asked as they sat down on the cushioned chairs.

Jackie rubbed her bare arm and looked up at the starry sky. It was gonna be a beautiful tomorrow. She wished she had someone to spend it with. "Yeah, I'm fine," she said. Even though she was feeling closer to Donna than she had in months she still didn't want her to know about her and Hyde. He and Donna had always been so close; so close that sometimes Jackie had felt like the third wheel. Scared of being judged by her friend, she decided to keep her troubles to herself.

"How's Hyde? I haven't managed to get over to see him this week. Between the radio station and my community college courses the days just get away on me. I feel really bad."

Jackie playfully slapped Donna's arm. "Oh you silly lumberjack! Don't feel bad. You have enough to worry about what with feeding Eric up for the winter n what not. Steven's fine, he has nothing to do all day but watch TV, listen to his crappy music and smoke weed...he is in Steven heaven right now," she joked. Both girls laughed and for a moment Jackie felt like her old self. Her and Donna, sat outside the Forman's, talking about boys, laughing. But in the pit of her stomach lurked an uneasy feeling that just wouldn't go away, no matter how much she smiled or how much wine she consumed.

"Yeah, sounds like Hyde's idea of paradise." Donna sipped her wine and ran a hand through her hair. "Hey, Jackie, you know if there's ever anything you need to talk about I'm here for you right? I mean, I know things were awkward with us when Cassidy was around n all, but I hope you still feel you can count on me."

Jackie smiled as Donna reached out and grabbed her hand. She did know she could count on Donna, just not when it came to Hyde, but that probably had more to do with Jackie's own insecurities than anything Donna had done.

"Yes, Donna, I know I can count on you and if I ever felt like you could be of some assistance to me of course I would ask you. Which reminds me, soon it will be Fall, I'll need some help rearranging my wardrobe, you better set aside a day to help."

Donna laughed and quickly dropped Jackie's hand. "Yes, princess, I'll be there," she said.

"Great, and once we're done with mine we'll get on to yours. Just putting a flannel shirt over a t-shirt doesn't constitute seasonal change, Donna, it just shows how lazy you are." Jackie grinned over at Donna indicating that she was half-pie joking but was also pleased to be having this time with her. The sparkle in Donna's eye told her that Donna too enjoyed their time together, even if Jackie was sticking to small talk. "Hey, Donna-"

"Yeah?"

"Is it okay if I stay at your place tonight? I've had a few drinks and really don't think I should drive all the way home."

"Yeah of course but you know Eric can drive you home, he hasn't been drinking," Donna offered.

Jackie nodded toward Hyde's Camino parked in the Forman's driveway. "But then I'll just have to find a way to get here tomorrow to get the car, it's just easier if I stay and go home in the morning."

Donna grinned a goofy grin. "But won't you miss your puddin' pop?" she sing-songed, "and won't he miss you?" Donna's voice went low and doing her best Hyde impression she said, "Jackie, I miss you, babe, I need you here with me."

Jackie rolled her eyes and stood up. "We _can_ spend one night apart, Donna. Now come on, lets go back to your place before I have to look at Red's bucket of fish again. Oh," she said turning back to Donna, "and the sheets on your spare bed better be nice, or you'll be remaking it."

"Yes, sir!" Donna laughed as she followed Jackie inside to get Eric and their bags.

...

 _Saturday, 29th August, 1981_

 _9.30pm_

 _Donna and Eric's Apartment_

 _Point Place_

Jackie was sprawled out on Donna's couch in a fit of giggles as Donna told her a story about Kitty walking in on her and Eric having sex. A glass of wine dangling precariously in her hand and with tears in her eyes she said, "Oh my god, Donna! He is such a mommy's boy! I can't believe he gave her a key to your apartment!"

Donna was sitting on the floor, her back leaning against the couch, pouring the last of the wine into her glass. "I know! And you'd think he would've told me he had _before_ we decided to have afternoon sex on our couch!"

"Ugh!" Jackie said in between giggles. "I can't believe I'm lying on the couch. I'm just too drunk to care right now! Remind me to throw these clothes away tomorrow."

The two friends didn't notice Eric walk into the lounge until he spoke. "Donna, do you mind not telling her _everything_? And devil, I'm not a mommy's boy, she wanted a key so she could do our cleaning while we're at college. Oh, and don't be surprised if she has one to your apartment too. She can be quite persuasive when she wants to be." He waved his toothbrush in Jackie's face and she flicked it right out of his hand. "Thanks, Jackie, you owe me a toothbrush."

"Whatever, Eric," she slurred. "Hey, change the music for us would ya? Led Zepp reminds me of you know who and it's my night off, I don't need to be thinking about him right now. Put something fun on."

"Yeah," Donna agreed, "put something on we can dance to. I feel like dancing!"

Eric walked over to the stereo and began flicking through the albums. At first no one heard the knock at the door, but when it grew louder Eric quickly went to answer it.

"Hyde, how's it?" he said as Hyde walked through the door.

Jackie's head swung up and the smile fell from her face right as Donna jumped up and threw her arms around Hyde's neck. "Oh my god, Hyde! It's so cool to see you! Lemme get you a drink," she said as she stumbled to the fridge to find him a beer.

His eyes were locked on Jackie as he mumbled 'hellos' to Eric and Donna and before she knew it he was crouched down on the floor in front of her.

"Hey," he said, his hand stroking her cheek. Jackie sat up, angry that he'd come to ruin her night. She was here because she didn't feel like arguing and she knew they'd end up arguing. They always did.

"How did you get here?" she asked as he sat down next to her.

"Cab."

Donna walked back in and handed him a beer. "Awwww, puddin' cabbed all the way here to see his girl. That's so cute." The redhead's eyes fluttered mockingly and she grinned like a Cheshire cat.

Jackie gulped her wine and rolled her eyes. "Oh shut up, Donna."

"Hey, I think it's cute," Donna said, swaying a little on her feet, "I think you two are so cute, all cuddled up on the couch. They're cute, right Eric?" She turned to look at Eric who was still standing by the stereo. "Hey, weren't you gonna put something on for me and Jackie to dance to? Get up, Jackie, we're gonna dance remember."

Jackie shook her head and placed her glass on the wooden coffee table. "I have a bit of a headache sorry, Donna. I don't think I can dance now," she lied.

Eric put his arm around Donna and glanced sympathetically at Jackie. "Yeah, Donna, I think it's time we go to bed anyway. We promised my mom we'd go to church in the morning."

Donna's arms fell loosely around Eric's small waist and her eyes briefly closed. She was hammered, much to Jackie's relief, and wasn't picking up on the tension that had filled the room since Hyde's arrival.

"Eric, I hate going to church. I wanna dance with Jackie..." Donna complained as Eric led her to their bedroom.

"I know, Donna," Eric said before looking back at Hyde and Jackie, "Night guys."

"Goodnight, Eric. Thank you."

"Later, Forman."

Once the bedroom door was closed Jackie stood up and began gathering up the glasses and bottles, taking them to the kitchen. Her head was swirling, and looking at Hyde just made it swirl faster. Why couldn't he have left things until the morning?

Standing at the sink she felt him come up behind her, sliding his hand around her waist. "You girls are pretty drunk," he said into her ear.

Jackie bristled at his touch and she concentrated hard on washing the few dishes in the sink. "So?"

Hyde kissed her neck. "So nothin', I was just sayin'." His hand smoothed under her t-shirt and across her bare stomach. It was so warm that in her inebriated state she almost forgot why she was angry with him.

"Steven, why did you come here?" Jackie asked. "I said I'd be home in the morning."

"Because I wanted to be with you, it's stupid you stayin' here while I'm home on my own." He was trailing kisses along the back of her neck, nudging her hair out of the way with his face, acting as if everything were fine between them. It was typical Hyde behaviour; if he were mad with Jackie she had to grovel for a week, but if she were mad with him a few hot kisses would make everything better.

But not this time.

She turned around to face him. "No, Steven, what was stupid was you getting wasted and falling asleep after promising me you wouldn't. I'm sick of it. If you're not asleep you're angry, if you're not angry you're getting high, and so the circle continues. I don't fit anywhere in your schedule."

Hyde took off his glasses and hooked them into the collar of his black hoodie. "C'mon, Jackie, yes you do."

"Where? Where do I fit in? Tell me?"

He raised his eyebrows and grinned. "Today, earlier...you were in my schedule then," he said, referring to their lovemaking that afternoon.

"First time in weeks that's happened," Jackie scoffed. "And then you went n ruined it." His face fell as she pushed past him and moved into the lounge to finish tidying up.

"C'mon, Jackie. I've said I'm sorry and I'm here now aren't I?"

Jackie flicked the stereo off and swung around to look at him. "Yeah, well maybe I wish you weren't," she started, her voice soft so as not to disturb Eric and Donna, "maybe I wish you could've let me have a break from your crap. Maybe I wanted a night to myself."

Hyde's whole demeanour changed and he stood straight, his eyes losing their softness. "A break from my crap ya reckon?" he snarled. "You want time on your own, Jackie? Take all the time you need. I'm done with this shit." He strode purposefully to the door without so much as a glance in Jackie's direction and she suddenly regretted her words. Yes she was angry. Yes she wanted some time to herself. But if he left now he might do something rash that they'd both end up regretting in the morning.

Rushing over to him she didn't notice Eric's Styx album on the floor and as she stepped on it the smooth cover slid across the plush carpet causing her to tumble to the ground. Hyde's hand was on the doorknob but his eyes were on her as she fell at his feet. "Fuck, Jackie!" he said as he bent down. "Are you okay?"

Jackie grabbed at Hyde's hoodie as he helped her up, embarrassed, but physically fine. "Yeah I'm good," she mumbled, eyeing the offending album evilly. "Stupid Eric and his stupid records."

Hyde wrapped his arm around the back of her neck and kissed her head. She breathed in his familiar scent and held his hoodie tight in her hands, not wanting to let go.

"Yeah, stupid Styx," he said, weaving his hand through her hair. "Anyway, I'm pleased you're okay." He softly kissed her forehead before saying, "Guess I should get goin'. I'll see you in the morning yeah?"

"Wait, Steven." Jackie clung to his waist as he reached for the door. "Where are you gonna go?"

He shrugged. "I'll just walk over to the Forman's."

"No," she whispered into his chest. "Just stay here. With me."

Hyde tilted her chin up with his finger and stared her in the eye. "You sure? If you want a break I can give you a break."

Jackie sighed. "Right now all I want is some sleep," she said. "And I want you next to me okay?"

"I can do that," Hyde smiled as Jackie led them to the spare room.

...

Hyde lay in Eric and Donna's spare double bed with Jackie curled against his body. Her head lay on his chest, her hand lay where he imagined his heart was, and her right leg was draped over his. Her breaths were evenly spaced, they had been since she'd fallen asleep twenty minutes ago. Fuck he wished he could fall asleep.

Lying in the dark, listening to Jackie's breathing, Hyde decided he'd dodged another bullet that day. Not a bullet that would've physically hurt, like the one lodged in his shoulder hindering movement in his left arm, but a bullet that would've hurt emotionally. He didn't deserve Jackie, but he couldn't be without her, and he knew he had to find a way to let her in. He had to be more emotionally available to her. But emotions sucked -big time- and burying them away had always served him well. Okay, maybe it hadn't served him _that_ well, but he just wasn't that guy; he wasn't Forman or Fez, and he wasn't sure he wanted to be. But he did want to keep Jackie.

Gently wiggling himself out from under her he heard her groan.

"Not again, Steven, I'm too tired," she moaned.

He grinned. "You're off the hook, babe," he said kissing her lightly on the cheek. "Twice in one day is a fair effort, go back to sleep. I'm just gonna grab a water." Jackie rolled off him and pulled the blankets high around her neck while Hyde grabbed his boxers off the floor and put them on. The apartment was deadly quiet so he closed the kitchen door when he turned the light on so as not to disturb anyone. It only took two steps forward on the cold linoleum floor for him to wish he'd stayed in fuckin' bed. There, on the fridge, staring at him was photo upon photo of Johnny.

One photo in particular caught Hyde's attention and against his better judgement he walked over to take a closer look. It was of him, Red, and Kitty, with Johnny in her arms, taken a week or so after his birth. They were sat on the Forman's couch, all smiling proudly. Even Red. Hyde's stomach dropped as the familiar feelings of failure, guilt and sadness washed over him. Trembling, he ripped the photo out from under the plastic apple magnet and went straight to the corner cupboard. It didn't take long to find what he wanted. Sitting there, amongst all the other herbs and spices was Eric and Donna's stash. Hyde threw it on the counter before opening the second drawer to find the papers and a lighter. What was he doing? A huge part of him wanted to go back to bed and hold Jackie, maybe show her the photo, maybe tell her how shit he felt. But a bigger part, the stupid unemotional part, rolled the joint and perched on the counter next to an open window.

As Hyde inhaled his first toke the kitchen door opened. "Hyde, man, what the hell are you doing?" a tired looking Eric asked before closing the door quietly behind him.

Hyde discretely slid the photo under his thigh and held the joint out to Eric. "Pleased you could join me, Forman," he smiled.

"I don't want to join you, it's like, midnight. I'm just wondering what you're up to. Jackie's gonna kill you if she gets up." Eric shuffled over to the counter and lent against it.

"She's out to it, man. She'll never know." Hyde brought the joint to his lips again and dragged hard, trying to ignore Eric's disapproving look. The skinny momma's boy had no idea what Hyde was going through right now, so he had no right to judge him.

"Hyde, I talked to Jackie tonight, I know what happened today. That's why I can't believe you're doing this tonight, dude. Are you, I dunno, _trying_ to piss her off?" Eric folded his arms across his chest and stared quizzically at Hyde. If Hyde wasn't so buzzed he would've punched him then and there.

"No, _Forman,_ I'm not tryin' to piss her off. I just needed this. If you're pissed I raided your stash you can calm down, I'll pay ya back tomorrow."

Eric shook his head. "I don't care about the stash, I care about what's going on with you-"

"Nothin's going on with me. I couldn't sleep, I wanted a joint. It's no big deal." Hyde exhaled the last of the smoke and stubbed the roach out on the outside ledge. "We've done this plenty of times before, Eric, I don't get why you're up lecturing me about it now, man."

"Because things are different now, Hyde. We used to do this all together-"

"Not always," Hyde interrupted.

"-okay, not always, but most of the time. It was something we did for fun, it was never something we needed to do to help us function."

Hyde rolled his eyes. "Oh my god, this is some sorta after school special." He jumped down from the counter, not noticing the photo fall to the ground. "If ya don't mind, I'm going back to bed. Night, Forman."

"Hyde, wait. Is this what this is about?" Hyde turned around to see Eric holding the photo in his hand. "It's Johnny isn't it? You haven't dealt with his death and now it's all hitting you."

Hyde scoffed. "Whatever. It has nothin' to do with him."

"Then why did you take the photo off the fridge? Why did you need a smoke tonight?"

Hyde's heart thumped in his chest as his mind scrambled in a fuzzy marijuana haze. "Told you, couldn't sleep."

Eric stepped toward him, still holding the photo. "Hyde, you never cried when he died and I'll bet you still haven't cried-"

"Not everyone cries, Forman."

"But everyone grieves. Tell me, how have you grieved?" Eric's questions were seriously pissing Hyde off now and he regretted ever getting out of bed for that damn drink of water.

He shrugged. "When did you become a shrink, Eric? As far as I knew you were gonna be a teacher."

"Look, dude, all I'm saying is that until you talk about it, or acknowledge how you're feeling, you're gonna stay a mess, needing this -" Eric held up what was left of his stash, "- to help you sleep. And I'm telling you, you're pushing everyone away, especially Jackie, and how much more of a mess are you gonna be once she leaves?"

Eric was in serious danger of killing Hyde's buzz. Too many nerves had been hit, too many truths had been spoken, and Hyde didn't know what to do with any of it. So, before he left the kitchen and went back to bed, he said the only thing he could say when he had to protect himself, "Whatever."


	25. Chapter 25

_Sunday, September 6th, 1981_

 _8.45pm_

 _Jackie & Hyde's Apartment_

Jackie stacked the last of the dishes away and joined Hyde on the couch to watch the Sunday feature film. They'd had a good weekend together; granted, they hadn't actually left the apartment and enjoyed the sunshine, but it had been a drug-free, argument-free couple of days and that was good enough for Jackie.

Sliding onto Hyde's lap she screwed up her face. "The Longest Yard a _gain_?" she moaned. "I'm sure this was on not that long ago. Why do they think we want to watch sweaty prisoners play football?"

"It beats the other crap movies they usually put on," Hyde said, tossing his aviators onto the coffee table. "I don't mind this one."

Jackie tucked her head into the crook of Hyde's neck not really caring what movie was on. As long as she was in his arms, and he wasn't stoned, she was happy.

"I s'pose," she sighed. "I'm so tired I'd probably only get through half of it anyway."

Hyde nudged her with his shoulder and she felt his bristly beard catch in her hair. "I thought you liked Burt Reynolds? Didn't you once tell me he was the only man who could pull off a pornstache?"

"Yes I do and yes I did. He's super hot and you looked super weird when you tried to rock that thing. God, just the thought of it makes my skin crawl." Jackie hated thinking back to those days. At the time it was like living in a bad dream, one she couldn't wake up from. Steven was an asshole with a creepy moustache; Eric was in Africa; Donna was blonde; Michael was gone; and she was dating Fez. It was a horrible, horrible time and one she wanted to forget."

"Yeah," Hyde agreed, lightly pulling at the whiskers on his chin, "it probably wasn't my best move."

"None of your 'moves' that year were your best," Jackie snapped without thinking.

Hyde quickly pulled her closer against him. "Now, now, Jackie, let's not get into that." He kissed the top of her head and just the touch of his lips seemed to take away the bad thoughts that had resurfaced. They hadn't argued about Sam since they'd been back together. A skank he'd accidently married to spite her when he was 19 just wasn't important anymore. There were bigger things to worry about now. There was no need to scratch at old wounds.

"Sorry," she said, her tired eyes drifting to the TV. "Anyway, what are you doing tomorrow, baby? Any appointments?" Hyde didn't answer her, his attention locked on Burt Reynolds careering around Palm Beach in a flashy car followed by the police. Jackie waved a hand in his face and he frowned. "Steven, I asked you a question."

"What?" Hyde said, trying to dodge her hand and see the TV.

"I asked what you were doing tomorrow."

"Um, thought I might go in to work," he mumbled nonchalantly as though it was something he did everyday. As though it wasn't something Jackie had been waiting for him to do for freaking weeks...

She quickly jumped up onto her knees and cupped his face like a proud mother. "Oh my god, Steven, are you serious? You're going into Grooves tomorrow?" For Jackie this was unbelievable progress and would no doubt lead to other things, like dinners out, or movies, or trips to the mall...

Hyde's eyes darted momentarily from the television to Jackie. "Yeah," he shrugged.

"Oh this is wonderful!" Jackie threw her arms around his neck and began showering him with kisses. "You should've told me sooner, I would've ironed a shirt. I guess I can do it in the morning, what tim-"

Hyde jerked his head out of her firing line and frowned. "Jackie, what's the deal, man? You're acting like I've never worked a day in my life. Don't make this somethin' it's not."

Jackie pouted but her eyes smiled as she stroked his cheek. "It's a big deal, baby. It shows you're getting better, and it's gonna be so good for you getting out of here everyday. We're moving forward." She kissed him softly on the lips. "This is the best news ever, Steven."

When Hyde slipped his tongue into her mouth Jackie closed her eyes and let herself imagine their future together. Over the last few months she hadn't dared let herself get carried away with such fancy illusions as her past had always proved that the higher you build your dreams the further they have to fall. The Seattle Incident had been a prime example. But now, with Steven seemingly on the mend, perhaps things could work out for her. Perhaps they would make it as a couple.

So wrapped up in her thoughts Jackie barely registered that she was now lying down on the couch. She hadn't even noticed Hyde's warm hand sweeping up her thigh, pushing the skirt of her dress high around her waist. On loop in her head was his words, _'going into work'_ accompanied by an image of him smiling a _real_ smile, one that she hadn't seen in a long time. He would get that smile back, she was sure of it.

With a surge of enthusiasm usually only reserved for the Black Friday sales, Jackie made light work of Hyde's belt and ripped open his jeans while he sucked furiously on her neck.

"Damn, Jackie," he groaned, lifting his head to look at her. "I should'a gone back to work weeks ago."

Jackie swept her tongue across his bottom lip while he gazed down at her with lust filled eyes. "You're going tomorrow, baby, and that's good enough for me," she said as Hyde settled himself between her legs.

...

 _Friday, 11th September, 1981_

 _5.10pm_

 _The Lake_

Hyde crouched down at the edge of the lake and scooped up enough water to fill his cupped hands. The instant he splashed the cool liquid over his face and hair he felt revived. Even the little droplets running down his chest and arms were enough to wake his hot, tired body, giving it the fuel he needed to drive home. He wiped the last bits of moisture across his forehead before making his way over the pebbly shoreline to the track that led to his car.

He had tried to go to Grooves that week. Once. On Monday morning he'd strolled into his business, wearing a t-shirt ironed by Jackie carrying a lunch made by Jackie, with every intention of working. Randy had been pleased to see him and had given him the full rundown of how everything had been going. Business was fine, staff were happy, place was still standing. The world had kept turning without him and his girlfriend was beyond ecstatic that he was re-entering said world. It very nearly made him happy.

As he unlocked the Camino he remembered sitting behind the counter that Monday, checking the books. Randy had done a good job keeping the place ticking. Hell, the pretty boy had done a better job than Hyde and he was impressed. He had glanced up a few times, watching the customers as they flicked through the albums, and to his horror he found most of them were watching him right back. They didn't care about the records, they were too interested in the freak show sitting at the counter. Remembering how claustrophobic he had felt in Grooves that morning he tugged at his t-shirt collar as he sat down in his scorching hot car. He couldn't stay in that store that day. No matter how much it meant to Jackie. He'd lasted an hour. Maybe next week he'd try for two.

Driving through Point Place Hyde thought of Jackie's face that Monday night when she'd asked him how work had gone. Her eyes had been wide with expectation and sparkled like he had never seen before. She wanted to hear that he'd had a great day, and that he was looking forward to Tuesday and every day after that. So that's what he'd given her. He given her more lies to protect her from the truth. Bursting her bubble seemed too cruel, stringing her along was kinder.

Jackie didn't need to know that he spent his days hiding in his old room at the Forman's or at the lake. It would only hurt her to know that he timed every call he made to her perfectly so that she wouldn't try and call him at work. It would kill her to finally realise she was shacked up with such a loser.

This way was better.

And he would try again next week.

The sight of Jackie's blue car parked in it's usual spot in their apartment carpark surprised Hyde. She was never home before 6.30pm and as he parked the Camino he suddenly felt uneasy. He got out of the car and walked the short way to the apartment, the whole time reasoning with himself that her presence was no big deal. She might be sick. She could've forgotten something. She might have walked to work. Jackie being home didn't mean he was busted; or so he kept telling himself.

Taking a deep breath he opened the door to find Jackie dressed up to the nine's checking her make-up in the lounge mirror.

"Hey, babe." He greeted her casually, masking the guilt that was churning through every vein in his body.

"Hi," she said without looking at him.

Kicking the door closed behind him Hyde took the opportunity to admire the view. She was wearing a new dress, it had to be new. He would've noticed a black, strapless, skin tight dress that hugged her in all the right places; no doubt about it. His eyes trailed up from her stiletto clad feet, past her smooth tanned legs, to where the dress ended, mid thigh. She was hot, smoking hot.

"You look good," he remarked, standing behind her. As he wrapped his arms around her waist he caught the subtle fragrance of her perfume and his guilt subsided, replaced with a desire to have her. He brushed the brunette locks off one of her shoulders and kissed her olive skin. "Are we goin' somewhere?" Hyde asked between kisses. "I don't remember you mentioning a party?"

"I'm going somewhere," Jackie replied. "I figured you'd be exhausted from work so wouldn't want to come."

He stopped kissing her and looked up. "Well where are _you_ going then? And actually, why aren't you at work?"

Jackie tossed her compact and brush into her bag and swung around. "Speaking of work, Steven, how was your day today? Busy selling albums? Lots of customers? Plenty of paperwork?" she enquired, her eyebrows arched.

"Ah, yeah, to all of the above." Hyde moved back, overcome with uneasiness again, and sat on the arm of the couch. "Busy day, y'know."

"No, Steven, I don't know, why don't you tell me?" Jackie's voice was way too calm for Hyde's liking. He knew she knew, but if she didn't know, and he said it, he was fucked. Clearing his throat he scrambled for an answer.

"Jackie, Grooves is Grooves. Same old same old. Now why don't you tell me where you're goin' 'cause I'm not sure I want you goin' anywhere dressed like that without me." He flashed his trademark grin, the one that usually worked with Jackie, but she remained stoic.

"Well," she said with a hand on her hip, "I've had an awful day, Steven. You see, I decided to do something nice for my boyfriend today and I went and got us both a nice lunch and took it into his work-" Hyde's stomach dropped to his workboots; he was fucked, "-and my gosh, you can imagine my surprise when I got to his work only to find he wasn't there today. I mean, he had kissed me goodbye this morning and _said_ he was going to work-"

Hyde stood up and stepped toward her only for her to quickly walk to the kitchen counter and grab a beer. "Jackie, look-"

"and _then,_ " she continued, "imagine how I felt when I find out that he hadn't actually been into work all week? My boyfriend has lied to me all week..." Jackie's voice trailed off as she sipped her bottle and stared at the corner of the ceiling. He knew she was fighting the tears. He had seen her do it so many times before.

"Jackie, I'm sorry, I can explain." Could he explain? If he could've, he would've on Monday night, but he couldn't then, and he probably couldn't now. He moved to hold her hand but she pulled it away.

"No, Steven, no more lame excuses, no more sorrys. I can't do this anymore." He caught her eye for a moment, and in that moment he saw so much sadness that he wanted to punch himself in the arm. She wanted to break up, again. Because he had fucked up, again.

"Babe, just listen to me." He followed her into the kitchen. "I went in on Monday, did Randy tell you that? It was just hard, man. Like it was hard havin' to see people n shit...I had to get outta there." The truth. He'd actually told her the truth.

"And you couldn't tell me this on Monday why?"

 _Because I like seeing you happy...because I didn't wanna disappoint you...because I didn't want you to see how weak I am..._

Hyde could've given her any number of reasons but instead he shrugged and shook his head, his arms crossed defensively across his chest.

Jackie rolled her eyes. "A shrug? That's it?" she said, flicking her hair over her shoulder in one brisk motion. "Typical."

When she picked up her handbag Hyde panicked. She couldn't leave, not now, like this. "Jackie, wait," he said stepping in front of her, his hands on her arms. "Where are you going? Don't go out now, we're talki-"

Her eyes narrowed and for the first time in a long time she regarded him with disdain. "Talking? No, Steven, I'm done trying to talk to you. You should've tried talking ages ago. I'm going to have some drinks and _talk_ with the girls from work. While I'm there -" she opened their bedroom door, "-I suggest you finish this and get out of here before I get home. Leave the key on the counter."

Hyde stepped around her and looked into their bedroom. His duffel bag sat on the bed, half packed. His drawers were opened and his t-shirts were hanging out waiting to return to where they'd come from. Shoes, albums, jeans, boxers...all his, strewn across the room. "What the fuck?" he exclaimed as Jackie pushed past him heading toward the door.

"Oh," she began, "sorry, I started packing then I realised I'm always cleaning up your messes. You're a big boy, your hand is way better, you can sort this mess yourself."

Hyde's fist clenched at his side as he stared at his crap. "Are you fuckin' serious, Jackie?" he asked through gritted teeth.

She turned to him. "I'm so serious, Steven. I'm done."

His heart was pounding and he fought the urge to smash his hand through the fucking wall. She had lied. Only two weeks ago she had promised she wouldn't leave him again but she was full of it, just like his fucking mother. The line between love and hate is a small one and right now Hyde could've sworn he hated the small brunette glaring at him from the doorway.

"You're done?" His voice was calm, a far cry from the rage building inside of him. "I hope you're sure of that, Jackie, 'cause once I'm gone I'm gone. Don't come lookin' for me next time you're scared or need protectin'. Don't come cryin' to me when you're all alone n realised you made a mistake-"

"The only mistake I made was believing that you loved me...that you needed me..." Jackie's voice was so small and Hyde knew she was crying. His breathing grew rapid as his inner turmoil grew. Should he break down now and tell her he loves her, tell her he needs her more than anything? But he'd told her that shit two weeks ago and here she was, kicking him out.

 _Bitch._

"Last chance, Jackie." He was being an asshole, covering up the pain he felt in his chest at the thought of her walking out that door. "If you leave that's it, I won't be here when you get back. You can take it all back now..."

From across the room he could see her bottom lip quivering and her small hand trembling. She didn't want him to leave anymore than he wanted to leave. So why was she doing this? All over him not going to work. It was a freaking joke and one that he'd make sure she'd regret.

"Steven," she whispered. "I want you to pack your things and go."

Hearing her words forced the rage inside of him to take over and he picked up her make-up bag and threw it at the wall, the contents scattering all over the lounge. "You fucking bitch!" he spat out at her. "I'll fuckin' go then-"

A quiet tap on the door silenced him but when Eric Forman stepped inside, looking all sad and broken, his verbal onslaught continued. "Forman? You called fucking Forman?" He looked from Jackie to Eric. "What and you raced over here to help me pack I s'pose? 'Poor Hyde, needs my help again, boo fucking hoo'. Well I'll tell ya what, Eric, I don't need you and I don't need _her_. So you can both get on outta here and let me get my shit."

Eric stood next to Jackie, his eyes wide with worry, his hands dangling nervously at his side. "No, Hyde, I'm just here to see that you're okay-"

"Well as you can see I'm just peachy. So you can fuck off now." The pain in his chest was excruciating and the humiliation of his best friend witnessing him being dumped was just making it worse. How could she have called Eric? Was it not enough that she'd just broken his heart.

Eric tentatively walked closer to Hyde. "Look, I'm here now, why don't I give you a hand packing. Maybe we can go grab a beer afterwards."

"Some beers sound good actually." Hyde glanced at Jackie and smirked. "Maybe we can check out that topless waitressing bar down the street, heard there's some pretty hot ass there n I think I'll be wantin' to get laid tonight."

Jackie's soft cry turned into a loud sob and she covered her mouth with her hand.

Eric looked at her concerned. "Hyde, dude, don't be like that-"

"Like what, Eric? Like a single guy lookin' for some action?" He was talking to Eric but staring at Jackie coldly. "She's chuckin' me out, technically I'm single so I can do what I want."

"But-"

Jackie cut Eric off. "Steven, can't you see why I'm breaking up with you? I love you so much but you keep hurting me with your lies. You won't talk to me...for a while there you wouldn't even look at me. What am I supposed to do?"

"Oh, well you do what every broad does when she's sick of a guy- chuck him out." Hyde's smirk faded as his rage took hold again. "You," he said with a calmness that belied his anger, "are just like my fucking mother and I fucking hate you just like I hate her."

Jackie's sobs filled the room as she fell back against the door but Hyde could've cared less. She'd done this to herself. She'd driven him to this. It was all her fault.

"Not cool, Hyde, not cool at all. " Eric's face was one of disgust and Hyde wasn't sure he'd ever seen the guy look so angry. "Get your stuff and let's get outta here."

Hyde stared at both of them, the woman he loved and his best friend, both standing there against him. Two people that had always hated each other were now united by their disgust in him. How could they turn on him? They were assholes.

He stepped toward them and they both flinched. Good, they were scared. Pointing a finger between them he said, "You can both fuck off. You both make me fucking sick and I don't need either of ya. So get."

To his surprise it was Jackie that spoke. "We haven't done anything to you, Steven. You did this all to yourself. You made the choice to be like this."

If she had shot him then and there it wouldn't have hurt as much as her words. How could she say he had chosen any of this? The rage tumbling around in his stomach twisted so tightly he thought he was gonna snap in half and now even his left hand had managed to clench into a fist.

"I did this to myself?" he said, his eyes boring into Jackie. "I did this to myself?" he repeated. "Are you saying I chose this life? That I wanted my parents to leave me? That I wanted you to go to Chicago? That I wanted to find you n Kelso in that motel room?" Hyde didn't know where the words were coming from, all he knew was that they wouldn't stop. "You think I wanted to marry that stripper and fuckin' stay married to her. I hated that part of my life, and the worst part was watchin' you carry on with Fez of all people-"

"Steven, I-"

"-let me talk, Jackie. You wanted me to talk now I'm talkin'. Are you saying I wanted to end up with a drug whore psycho girlfriend? Do you really believe I chose to get shot and that I took some pleasure in you gettin' stabbed? 'Cause, Jackie, I don't get how any of that is entirely my fault." Hyde's breathing was so quick it felt like he wasn't getting any oxygen. His body was too tense, too angry, but he couldn't find a release.

Jackie wiped her eyes, black mascara smearing across her cheeks. "No, I'm not saying it was all your fault. I'm saying that you made choices, sometimes silly choices, and you have to live with the consequences. But, Steven, the Sam stuff doesn't even matter now, I'm not even talking about her-"

"But you're saying you reap what you sow? Is that your point?"

Jackie hesitated. "yes...no...oh I don't know." She was sobbing again. Loudly.

Eric put a comforting hand on Jackie's shoulder before turning to Hyde. "Do you think you reap what you sow, Hyde?"

 _Yes I fucking do..._

Hyde glared at Eric and shrugged. "Dunno," he muttered, daring Eric to keep going with this.

"Do you think some kinda higher power is punishing you for all your fuck ups? Maybe, I dunno, because you hurt Jackie so much in the past someone up there isn't gonna let you be happy-"

Hyde was getting agitated. "Fuck up, Forman, you know I don't believe in that crap."

Eric raised an eyebrow. "I think you believe in karma - what goes around comes around n all that - and I think you might feel a little guilty about the people you love getting hurt. I think you might think it's your fault...that they're being punished for your sins."

 _That's exactly how I feel..._

"Forman, shut up." Hyde's hands a _nd_ jaw were clenched now and if he didn't find a release soon he was gonna explode.

"Hyde, what happened to John-"

That was it. That was all it took for Hyde to unravel. In one foul swoop he kicked the wooden coffee table over, breaking two of it's legs. He heard Jackie scream as the heavy object landed on an armchair, but he still wasn't done. Storming across the room all he could see was Forman and that mouth that wouldn't stop flapping. He grabbed his best friend by the scruff of the neck and threw him up against the wall.

"Steven, no!" Jackie cried to no avail.

"I fuckin' told you, Eric. I told you to shut your mouth," Hyde yelled into Eric's face. Much to Hyde's annoyance Eric stayed calm. His arms dangled at his side, his face appeared more concerned than frightened.

"Why do you want me to shut my mouth Hyde? Why don't you want me to talk about Johnny? Would you rather me talk about Cassidy stabbing Jackie? Is that a better topic for us?"

Hyde's eyes were clouding over in rage and his throat was starting to hurt where a lump was forming. This wasn't good. He couldn't see this night ending well.

"I don't wanna talk about any of it!" he shouted. "I want you to just shut the hell up!"

Eric's eyes were so wide and staring so hard into Hyde's that Hyde had to look away. "But I want to talk about Johnny, Hyde. I want to know how you feel about him dying. I want to know what goes-"

"Shut up..." Hyde's heart was racing. He was gonna have a heart attack for sure.

"-on in your head. Do you dream about him?-"

 _Every night..._

"-do you wish it had been you and not him?-"

 _Everyday..._

"Do you think it's your fault he died?"

Hyde wanted to punch Eric so bad. He had pleaded for the guy to shut his mouth. The idiot was torturing him with words and it was killing him. He could feel Jackie behind him, pulling at his t-shirt, trying to get him off Eric and he knew if he pulled his arm back he'd smack her in the face. He'd hurt her enough over the years, he couldn't do that to her.

Eric's words, his face, Jackie's screams, were piercing. They were becoming a mish-mosh of sounds and colours, none of them made sense anymore. For a moment it was like he was in the eye of a tornado, everything was spinning around him, but suddenly it all stopped.

Calmness.

No screaming. No taunting. No crying. No flying coffee tables and make-up bags.

The rage was gone.

He was on his knees, in a quiet room. Slowly he opened his eyes and let the wetness fall. It was so unfamiliar, so foreign to him but it was pointless trying to fight them anymore. He was spent. He was done.

She was at his side, her arms wrapped tightly around his bicep like she was scared to let go. "I love you, baby," she whispered over and over again as his tears fell.

Eric was in front on him, leaning back against the wall, a friendly hand resting on Hyde's knee.

Hyde sniffed and wiped his cheek on his shoulder. It was a waste of time though, years of built up tears were waiting to spill, there was no point trying to get rid of them just yet. He closed his eyes, tears streaming down his face, and prepared himself to ask the people closest to him the question he'd asked himself over and over again.

"Why me?"

* * *

 _A/N: Two more chapters to go n we're done! Thanks so much for reviewing, you're all awesome x_


	26. Chapter 26

Every answer she could give to his question would be a cliché. None of the numerous responses currently popping into Jackie's head would be of any use to somebody like Hyde.

 _Because bad things happen to good people..._

 _Because sometimes life isn't fair..._

 _Because God works in mysterious way..._

 _Because it's all part of God's plan..._

They were too generic, she couldn't say them. So she chose to stay silent, holding him tightly as he sobbed, praying that Eric would once again come to the rescue. The dork didn't disappoint.

"Hyde, I honestly don't know why you've been hit with so many shitty things in your life," he said, "It's just not fair." Eric's skinny hand squeezed Hyde's forearm before he sat back against the wall, his head making a small 'thud' sound as it hit the wood.

Hyde looked up. "But it's what I deserve," was all he said.

Jackie hated hearing him talk like that. She could handle the tears, she could handle the anger, but she couldn't handle the self-blame. Her Steven was noble. He was loyal. Sure he had made some stupid decisions and stuffed things up on occasion, but what teenager didn't screw up at least a few times during their formative years? His mistakes certainly didn't warrant the repercussions he believed he'd brought upon himself, and she had to tell him that.

"Steven-" Her voice was croaky, partly due to the tears, partly because she was so damn nervous, "-Johnny passing away wasn't some kind of punishment. He didn't die because of anything you did in the past. None of it's your fault."

"Jackie's right." Jackie's eyes shot up and landed on Eric. Wow - the Star Wars freak had actually said she was right. That was an admission she'd store away and use at a later date, right now she'd let him continue. "You aren't being punished, man. What happened with Johnny could happen to anyone, the doctors told you that-"

"Yeah, but they also said havin' smoke n shit around a kid isn't good. That bitch was always smokin'...I should'a gotten him outta there."

"Come on, Hyde, you tried. You would've been done for kidnapping if you'd taken him."

Hyde's arms tightened around Jackie's waist as his forehead dropped onto her shoulder. She felt the moisture from his tears on her bare skin and decided nothing had ever felt so refreshing. He was finally letting go of his stupid pride and opening up.

"Fuck," Hyde wiped his cheek with the back of his hand and nuzzled his face into Jackie's hair. "I never should'a messed with her in the first place," he said, "If I hadn't been such a dick to Jackie we would've still been together and I never would'a gone to that bar and nailed Cassidy. None of this shit would've happened."

It was hard but Jackie bit her tongue. Now was not the time for 'I told you so's'. They couldn't rewrite history. They could only deal with the here and now and right now an 'I told you so' would've been as welcome as a Vegas stripper. It also didn't help that Jackie was dealing with her own guilt right now. Guilt that was stewing in her stomach despite her best efforts to shut it down.

"Well, what's done is done, dude," Eric said matter-of-factly. "All you can do now is try n move forward. Beating yourself up is getting you nowhere and when you're busy punishing yourself you're actually punishing all of us at the same time, especially Jackie."

"I know," Hyde said quietly into Jackie's ear.

"So what are you gonna do about it?" Eric's asked, causing Jackie's breath to hitch as she anticipated what Hyde would come back with in exchange for his friend's confronting tone.

But in a night full of surprises, Hyde's response fit the theme. "I'm gonna try n sort my shit out," he said without a trace of anger in his delivery. "I wanna move on."

"And how are you gonna do that?"

"You seem to have all the answers, Forman, why don't you tell me?"

"I know of a good grief counsellor, I could get the number over the weekend-"

"C'mon, Eric, I appreciate your help, man, but therapy ain't for me," Hyde said, a small smile creeping across his face. "I'm just not that guy. I'd rather shoot myself than talk to a stranger 'bout my problems." Jackie and Eric both stared at him, concerned. "Guys, chill out, I'm not gonna shoot myself. It was a figure of speech."

"Yeah, well, I still think some grief therapy is what you need, Hyde. I know you'd rather wallow in a dark room writing angry letters to the government but sometimes it helps to talk."

"I've talked haven't I? Hell, I even cried, which by the way, you better not tell anyone about, Eric. What happened here tonight stays between us. Got it?"

"Goes without saying," Eric assured him. "Anyway, I'm gonna get the number and if you feel like using it you can-"

"I won't feel like using it."

Eric checked the time on his watch before standing up. "Well if you change your mind it's there," he said. "Look, guys, I better get going, Donna will be wondering where I am. We were meant to be going to Bob's for chicken Pinciotti tonight. Lucky me." He rolled his eyes and looked totally unenthused about his dinner plans.

Jackie and Hyde both stood up to see their friend off. "I'm sorry for interrupting your plans, Eric, as unappetising as they are," Jackie said as she wrapped her arms around Eric's neck. "Thank you so much... for everything. I really appreciate you coming tonight."

"No problem." Eric briefly returned the hug before awkwardly stepping toward the open door. "Geez, Jackie, we've gotta stop this whole touching each other thing, people might start thinking we're actually friends." Jackie laughed as Eric called out a final goodbye and closed the door. It was weird, this new relationship with scrawny Eric, and Jackie was surprised that he was the person she'd found herself leaning on lately. But he was the only other person in the universe who knew Hyde like she did and she'd grown to like the guy. He was a friend now, not just a friend of her boyfriend's like he used to be.

...

For what seemed like an eternity Hyde and Jackie stood staring at the closed door. It was like the awkward moment at dinner parties when the mutual friend disappears to fetch a drink and two strangers are left scrambling for something to talk about. Without Eric keeping the conversation flowing the apartment was deathly silent, and strangely claustrophobic.

"So," Jackie said, turning around to face Hyde, "what now? Are you hungry? Thirsty?" Small talk. Offers of sustenance. What a way to lighten the mood. Jackie cursed herself for skirting around the real issues but she wasn't sure she could cope with them without Eric in the room.

Hyde glanced over at her, his arms folded across his chest. "Ah, no thanks, I'm good. I might just get started on this mess." Jackie followed his gaze across her living room. Make-up strewn all over the place, her coffee table balancing precariously on an armchair. Visual reminders of how Hyde could go from 0 to 100 in less than ten minutes.

She sighed. "Just leave it, I'll clean it up tomorrow, it's Saturday remember...cleaning day."

"I made the mess, I'll clean it up." Hyde picked up her floral make-up bag and began his quest to make things right. He searched under the couch and came up with a lipstick; behind the TV he found her favourite blush; resting atop a pile of fashion magazines he spotted her mascara. Everything was there, and everything was returned to the bag. He'd cleaned up his mess. But he hadn't said a word about fixing things with Jackie, or whether or not he even wanted to.

"Where do you want this?" he asked, holding up the bulging bag.

"Oh, here-" she held out her hand and took it, "-I'll put it away. Thanks."

Jackie hurried into the bathroom and quietly closed the door behind her. Everything that had happened since she'd stepped into Grooves earlier that day carrying croissants and cake had been exhausting and she needed a moment to regroup. Taking a warm washcloth to her face her mind danced with memories of her and Hyde. He'd been her everything, her hero. He'd punched a guy for calling her a bitch, accompanied her on shopping trips when Kelso had tossed her aside for used trash, given her somewhere to stay when her parents seemed to forget they had a teenage daughter. And now, when he'd so desperately needed her, she had been willing to throw him out. Why couldn't she have been his hero? Jackie Burkhart was not usually one to give up; not on a math problem or a tricky cheer tumble...hell she'd even spent a day making Big Rhonda look semi-decent. But she'd given up on him, the one person she loved more than anything.

And what made it even worse was that she'd promised him she wouldn't.

A light rapping at the door startled her and she quickly dabbed her red, puffy eyes with the washcloth.

"Jackie?"

"Yeah?" she said, trying to conceal the guilt in her voice.

"Can I come in?"

Jackie checked her reflection in the large bathroom mirror. She looked like shit, she felt like shit. But in a small, one bedroom apartment there was next to no chance of avoiding Hyde, so she opened the door and forced a smile.

"Of course you can."

Hyde shuffled in and as he passed her to lean against the vanity his familiar scent invaded her senses. Normally his scent, just like his presence, incited feelings of excitement or love or longing or passion, but right now she only felt sadness. Sadness for him because on top of having a crap life he also had a crap girlfriend.

"Jackie," he began. She held her breath. _I'm sorry,_ she thought, _don't hate me for giving up on you._ "I'm sorry." His voice was an octave lower, his shoulders slouched making him seem a few inches shorter.

She shook her head. "No, Steven, don't be sorry." Twisting the washcloth in her hands into a pretzel, Jackie forced herself not to cry. "I should be the one apologising, not you."

Hyde's expression was one of confusion, his forehead lined, his eyes narrowed. "You? What've you got to be sorry for? I'm the liar, I'm the one that fucked your apartment up. I'm the asshole."

"But I'm the one that gave up on you...I packed your things...asked you to leave-" Dammit, tears were forming and no amount of willing them away was gonna stop them falling.

"I deserved that, Jackie. I deserved losing you. I've been a dick to you and I wouldn't have wanted me around either." He ran a hand over his face, his eyes momentarily leaving Jackie's to look at the tiled floor. He was taking full responsibility for their troubles, for the first time ever, and while this would've excited the old Jackie, right now she wanted to share the load. She wanted to unburden him of some the guilt and remorse he'd been carrying around.

"No, Steven, I shouldn't have pushed you as much as I did. I shouldn't have expected you to go back to work so soon, or to want to do normal couple-y things with me. I drove you to lie to me."

Hyde stared straight at her, almost into her soul and his voice was so soft, so un Hyde-like when he said, "C'mon, Jackie, seriously? This is not your fault, man. All'a this is all on me."

She wiped a tear from her cheek and looked at him. Her Steven. The poor orphan boy who never could seem to catch a break in life. Whose only constant was the Formans. The man whose tough exterior wouldn't break, even for her. "Why couldn't you talk to me? she asked. "Why couldn't you tell me the photos of Johnny were killing you? Why couldn't yo-"

His head fell back and he focused on the ceiling. "I just couldn't. I'm not a talker-"

"Is it because I'm like her?"

"Who?" His eyes were back on her, once again confused.

Jackie swallowed down the lump in her throat. "Your mother. Is it because I'm like her that you felt you couldn't talk to me?" When Hyde had compared Jackie to Edna it had cut her like a knife. It'd hurt more than the haiku, more than his lips spitting the word 'bitch' in her direction, more than him claiming to want to fuck skanky topless waitresses. He hated Edna; for abandoning him, for not believing in him, for not caring about him, for not loving him. If he thought Jackie was anything like his mother their whole love affair was doomed to fail. And that thought sickened her to her core.

Hyde's face paled and his mouth fell open. "Jackie, I...I didn't mean that."

"But you said it. Easily. Do you think I treat you like she did? Is it because of Chicago? Because, Steven, I never meant to make you fee-"

He was shaking his head, both hands running the length of his face. "No, no, Jackie." His eyes shot to her, pained, full of remorse. "Baby I was being an asshole, I promise you I didn't mean it. You're nothin' like Edna." The words were coming a mile a minute as Hyde scrambled to reassure Jackie that his flippant comment wasn't based in any sort of truth. "She's a bitch, and you're...you're..."

Jackie wiped both her eyes, her heart pounding as she waited for him to get the words out. "I'm what?" she asked.

"You're everything to me." Hyde's face was a blank slate, the complete opposite of Jackie's which was positively beaming. But his blue eyes were glistening with moisture Jackie was sure he'd never let fall and were the most sincere she'd ever seen them. This moment, these words, would be recorded in her fluffy pink diary and kept forever.

"Everything?" She smiled. Hyde nodded as a corner of his mouth curled upwards. "So I'm forgiven then?" she asked.

Hyde shrugged and folded his arms. "There was nothin' to forgive." He lowered his head, his eyes looking up at her through his dark eyelashes. "More to the point, am I forgiven?"

Jackie playfully tapped her index finger on her chin as if pondering whether forgiveness would be granted. She couldn't help the mischievious grin that appeared on her face, that grin that for sure would alert Hyde to what was really going on in her head...the man knew her so well he probably already knew how hot for him his few words of devotion had made her. As she toyed with Hyde for a few more moments she cursed the bathroom for being so big and her earlier decision to stand by the door away from Hyde. What she wouldn't give to be in his arms right now...

"Okay," she finally breathed out. "I'll forgive you. Even though I do think I was a bitch and need forgiveness more than you do."

"Seriously? Jackie, I said you did nothin' wrong-"

"But I-"

Hyde took a hand out of his pocket and pointed an accusatory finger at Jackie. "Are you makin' this a competition, Jackie? Whose more in the wrong?"

"No," she replied, trying to hide the fact she kinda was.

He stepped toward her. "Coz if you are, you're not gonna win. Everyone knows I'm the biggest asshole out..."

"I'm not making it a competition, Steven, I'm merely stating facts. But if it _were_ a competition I would totally win." As Hyde slowly crossed the bathroom, Jackie's heart fluttered. They weren't talking about whose fault it was anymore, they were making up. And there was something about making up with Hyde that made fighting with him almost tolerable.

"Oh would you now?" Hyde said as he leaned his arm against the wall next to Jackie's head, his warm breath on her cheek causing her stomach to flip.

"Yes I would," she whispered. "Because I can bring down an enemy in less than a day."

Hyde smirked and placed his other hand on her hip, rubbing the silky fabric of her dress. "Lucky I'm not an enemy then." When his mouth began leaving wet kisses on her bare shoulder her eyes fell shut and all she could mumble was an 'uh-huh' in agreement. He hadn't initiated such intimacy in weeks and it felt good to be wanted by him again. Jackie knew this wouldn't solve all of their problems - Hyde verbally opening up to her was what they needed - but right now, it was a start. "Lucky," he murmured onto her shoulder, "coz we make such a good team."

His mouth was working it's way up her neck, his hand on her hip almost burning through the fabric onto her bare skin, and it was taking all Jackie's self-control not to rip open his jeans then and there. But she'd made it through years as Kelso's girlfriend and managed to avoid sex in a bathroom -public and/or private- and that wasn't about to change now.

Her head fell back against the wall as Hyde coaxed her leg up and wrapped it around his waist. "We do make a good team, Steven," she whispered, her hands creeping up his chest.

Hyde's mouth was on her jawline, licking, sucking, nibbling at her sensitive skin. "There is no one," he said, his mouth millimetres from her skin, so close she could feel the his soft beard moving as he talked, "I'd rather go into battle with than you."

When Jackie felt his other hand slide down her side and creep behind her thigh she knew exactly what he wanted. So she wrapped her arms around his neck and swung her other leg around his waist. Her tight mini dress was now bunched up around her waist, as Hyde grinded against her. The feeling of him between her thighs, the sensation of his mouth on her neck, it was nearly too much for Jackie to handle.

"Bedroom. Now." She begged as her hands pulled on his hair.

Hyde didn't say a word but his quick steps to their bedroom, and the growing hardness Jackie could feel between her legs as he carried her, told her that her idea was well received.

Once in the much more comfortable, one hundred times more romantic, sanctuary that was their bedroom, Hyde lay Jackie down on the bed. She pulled his t-shirt up, desperate to touch all of him, and he whipped it off before tucking a hand under her back.

"Fuck some of your dresses are harder to get into than Point Place High after dark," he moaned as he searched for the zipper.

Jackie directed his hand to her side. "It's a hidden one, silly. No one wants to see a big tacky zip on an expensive dress like this."

Hyde unzipped the dress and pulled it down, over her feet, before throwing it on the floor. "I don't wanna see it either," he said, holding her leg up as he kissed his way down it. "I just wanna get it down and off you."

Jackie giggled as she watched a shirtless Hyde press his mouth on nearly every inch of skin on her leg. Oh how she loved him...oh how she loved _this._ But the half packed duffel bag and his other belongings scattered across the floor were becoming a distraction. They were reminding her of how close she'd come to losing him. How close she'd come to losing _this._

"I'm sorry," she whispered as Hyde settled between her legs, his eyes glossed over in desire.

"Huh?" He propped himself up, arms either side of her head and looked down at her.

"For that," she said, her head nodding to the floor, her hands running up his strong back. "For packing your things."

Hyde glanced down at the floor then back at her. He shrugged. "Do you still want me to go?"

Jackie gasped at the suggestion. "No!" she said defiantly, wrapping her legs around his waist as if trapping him there with her forever. "I don't want you to ever go. I want you with me forever."

Hyde's expression turned almost dreamy and his smile was one that belonged to the cat that got the cream. "Good." He lowered his head before capturing her bottom lip gently between his teeth, sucking it for a moment, and only releasing it to whisper into her ear, "Coz I don't ever wanna leave. And starting from right now, I'm gonna prove it to you."

Jackie smiled triumphantly before Hyde's lips crashed down onto hers.

 _He's gonna prove it to me?_ she thought as his tongue sought out her own.

Now _that_ was something she couldn't wait to see.

* * *

 ** _A/N: I am truly sorry for the long delay...I had serious trouble with this chapter and wasn't sure if it would ever get posted. The biggest thank you EVER to ldiaz054 for all her encouragement...she is a star!_**

 ** _Thank you also to those that have reviewed/faved or pm-ed, I really do appreciate the support!_**

 ** _I'm pretty sure there is only one more chapter to go...the big questions are...How will Hyde make it all up to Jackie? ...and...Will he go to therapy? Stay tuned to find out..mwah!_**


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